Jacob Graham – Anarchist/Nutjob

Jacob is a left wing anarchist.
He wants to kill 50 politicians.

I’m all for young lads having a hobby.

No problem so far.

Jacob idolised Ted Kaczynski the unibomber, he stockpiled bomb making chemicals in the woods,
Had a 3d printer for making gun parts.

But that’s not my problem with Jacob.

On one of his rants waving a machete about you can clearly see a teddy bear on his pillow.

What sort of terrorist sleeps with a fuckin teddy bear?!!!

He also lives with his mum,
Looks like a young woody Allen and is a Scouser.

Image is important.

Pretty sure Che Guevara didn’t live with his mum?

BBC News

Nominated by: Miserable northern cunt

58 thoughts on “Jacob Graham – Anarchist/Nutjob

  1. Only fifty….
    No work ethic these youngsters..

    I imagine Jacob is a bit crackers…

  2. Well thank fuck he didn’t let one of his fireworks off in Liverpool..

    We’d never hear the fucking end of it.

  3. Obviously never had a girlfriend. He needs to move down the road to Rochdale and join the Ropers. They’ll find him lots of girlfriends.

    He might even start shaving eventually.

  4. Why’s he got such big specs? Is he a Dennis Taylor fan? Is that the price tag on his headphones?

  5. He’s got that teddy bear on show intentionally so that he looks like an open and honest type who hasn’t got dozens of encrusted magazines hidden beneath the mattress. His bed will be touching the ceiling by the time he’s thirty, the wanker.

  6. I think we’ve heard the end him. Harmless, but best to nip it in the bud. We played games when younger without access to computers. Again a necessary evil.

    • He saw himself as a Robespierre type,

      “Behold! It’s the people’s poet.
      He’ll show us the way.
      Let’s follow him!”

      Bombs aren’t much fun.
      That Unibomber he worshipped,
      His devices blew a woman’s fingers off.
      She wasn’t some evil footsoldier of the Establishment.
      Just a woman earning a living to support her family.

      I think Jacob and his sidekick Rupert are going to see some pretty awful things in jail

      ” Shut your eyes Rupert and whistle a happy tune.
      It’ll all be over in the morning”.

  7. I bet he can’t take his teddy bear into prison with him?

    His bottom is going to get properly tickled every day.

    Nothing like a bit of Imperial Leather in the ass.

      • Or he will cut a little hole in the bottom of his teddy bear and dream about what he could have if he were free.

      • Wonder if his mates back in Liverpool write to him?

        “Gutted to hear about the bizzies lockin you up like Jake,
        Stay strong la.

        Hey Jake any chance you could ask your mam if I could have your clothes?

        Shame to waste them,
        And have you got any plans what your going to do with your computer?”

  8. Jacob looks the sort who would probably cut one of his fingers off while making a video before he even left his bedroom.

    Less 9/11 more 999.

  9. Jacob looks like the sort who can’t get the lid off the jar of gelignite.

    ” Mum!!! I need some help”

  10. Know online as destro the destroyer.

    Well I hope more thought went into his terror campaign than his online moniker.

  11. Brilliant nom.

    My mum went to a lot of trouble to make me a teddy bear when I was about two. This was back in the early 1950s, when decent teddy bears were somewhat expensive and probably thin on the ground, what with post war austerity still a daily reality.

    Anyway, I spent the next five years+ punching its lights out and kicking the shit out of it. I still have it, not in my bedroom I hasten to add, and it’s now a very sorry sight indeed. My mum must have been much confused (and not a little disappointed) by my behaviour towards her lovingly crafted creation, but my dad was a right bastard cunt and I had to take my anger out on something before my brother was born several years later.

    Always feel slightly guilty whenever it catches my eye nowadays.

    • I remember me and my brother laughing as we launched those plastic dolls with beean bag bodies down the stairs or through the bedroom window at my nan’s. They belonged to a cousin and were practically indestructable.

  12. You don’t have to be Mystic fucking Meg to foresee that young Jacob is going to be in possession of A Very Sore Bottom.

    He won’t be too happy about ‘ Gripper Norris ‘ off C Wing either. Who’ll be shooting his load all over his specs, on a regular basis.

    This is what you get for being a member of the vicious ‘ Far Right ‘.

    Get To Fuck.

    • I foresee his first encounter with his new cellmate going something like this:

      Slasher Reed: “Oright, what’s your name new boy”
      Jacob: “It’s, um Jacob, Sir”
      Slasher Reed: “Wanna play a game, Jacob”?
      Jacob: “Um, no sir”.
      Slasher Reed: “Well I do. let’s play mummies and daddies. Do you wanna be mummy or daddy”?
      Jacob (thinking fast): “Um, I’ll play daddy”
      Slasher Reed: “Good choice Jacob. Now come over here and suck mummy’s cock”.
      Jacob: *gulp*.

  13. Don’t remember ever having a teddy bear,
    But I had a soft monkey,
    A chimpanzee.

    Quite realistic, looked a bit like James Cleverly
    Accept not a speccy twat obviously.

    Anyway I was naughty once to often and my mum threatened to take it off me.
    Id of been about 4yr.
    I thought she bluffing!

    Never saw it again!!
    Broke my fuckin heart.
    I’ve never forgiven her and still to this day hold a grudge and wait patiently for the chance to take something away she holds dear.

    Like a oxygen mask😁

  14. ‘Destro the Destroyer’ was probably his Dungeons and Dragon moniker, not exactly Carlos the Jackal is he. More the Eunuchbomber.

  15. It all stems from watching films made by the cunts living in Canada’s cellar.

  16. Why dont these fuckers act and not continually gob off, soft looking twat. Now he’s going to clink for a fantasy all the agro he’s got coming for nought.

  17. This cunt looks like Dean Tavalouris from the League of Gentlemen.

    How can such a fucking flake be taken seriously?
    Like most leftie ‘anarchists’ he’s a sad spotty cunt who has a laptop covered in spunk and Wotsits crumbs. Absolutely laughable.

  18. He also looks like a young Shostakovich, who worked as a fireman in his younger days.

  19. When he’s approached in the prison shower by a geezer with a grenade tattoed onto his knob, he’s going to find out the true meaning of “weapon of ass destruction”. Ass-blasted by Dynamite Dong Dave.

  20. No ones going to take this idiot seriously until he gets rid of the teddy bear. Then we will see what he is all about, the little fruitcake.

  21. Not a problem with wanting to kill politicians but I’d like to take that machete and cut his fucking ears off based on his gormless face!

  22. Once he admits he is no friend of the alphabet people he will be well and truly fucked maybe even literally. Needs meds for certain

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