(Old school film directors – Day Admin)
Never has the term visionary been so misapplied as it has to these cunts.
M. ‘Night’ Shyamalan – Had a couple of hits but since Signs has produced cringeworthy shite. Signs was marred by aliens being allergic to fucking water, on a planet covered in fucking water.
J.J. Abrams – made a career from copying Spielberg for one film then Michael Bay for the rest of his career without ever mastering how storytelling in films actually works.
Helped destroy both Star Wars and Star Trek, simply by rehashing plots of previous films of each property (not a ‘franchise’, you goddamn dirty Yanks) and making them for fans of The Fast and Furious films.
Rian Johnson – Made a decent science fiction film with Bruce Willis in Looper, but fucked up the middle of the new star wars trilogy and went on to direct Knives Out, another film that cheats the viewers and doesn’t seem to care.
Colin Trevorrow – yet another one-hit, one -tit monkey who made a middling indie film about time travel (Safety Not Guaranteed) and was given Jurassic World to play with. Effectively a special needs remake of the original that American geniuses lapped up, and a betrayal of the series created by Michael Crichton.
Trevorrow is another cheap no-mark drafted in by Disney to write and direct the last chapter of the Star Wars films but it didn’t meet Kathleen Kennedy’s warped expectations so he was given the boot.
Josh Trank – Another one-hit indie wonder who was hired by Fox to reinvigorate their mostly unadaptable Fantastic Four property but he ended up going nuts in his hotel and making no improvement on the relatively solid efforts of Tim Story in the noughties.
Understandably, more has come out as to what led to Trank’s unravelling during production and it seems the studio were making things much more difficult than as previously revealed.
Still, one decent Indie film about kids gaining superpowers is not a reason to throw wunderkind at him.
As for the subject matter, will a stretchy genius, a Brooklyn heavy made of bricks and a woman who turns invisible but gets a lot of revealing nosebleeds ever belong outside of a comic book? The character with the most cinematic ability (the human torch) has the least interesting personality..
A film of the fantastic Four should’ve been made when Dean Jones was still driving Herbie.
Joss Whedon – creator of Buffy; The Vampire Slayer and destroyer of the art of dialogue. Raked money in for Marvel with the Avengers but ultimately created the trend for soulless billion dollar cartoons-posing-as films.
Turns out this male feminist treated actors like cunts when working on the set of Buffy, and to think the bastard attended Winchester College.
Oh, so did Seumas Milne and Rishi Sunak!
As for cinematic visionaries there’s also James Gunn who ‘caught lightning in a bottle’ with his entertaining cartoon Guardians of the Galaxy but has put nothing but more spandex dross since.
Last and perhaps least of the irritants is Zack Synder. known for his over the top, hyper-stylised adaptations of comic boo… sorry, ‘graphic novels’.
Snyder has stayed with the trusted formula but things fucked up for him as Warner brothers tried to copy the success of Marvel and Disney and created such bloated, moronic CGI epics of their own as ‘Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Fuckpigs’ and ‘Fuckpig League’, the latter of which fell into disarray during production for all sorts of reasons too boring for most cunters and all too embarrassing for the actors and studios involved although the one that is most ridiculous is worth explaining; in one of these films Superman has a CGI top lip because Henry Cavill wasn’t allowed to shave his moustache as he was filming Mission Impossible with not-gay micro-tyrant Tommy Cruise.
One scene depicts Superman being brought back to life with a light-up Rubik cube. It made me think, ‘if only these ‘visionary’ cunts all perished so that Tony Scott could return to the living, the entertainment industry would be all the better for it’.
I include this link for reference, and because it made me laugh…
Nominated by: Cuntamus Prime
(Just a quick note to say there will be an additional and highly topical Nomination at 11am today. Thanks – Day Admin)
I like the Coen brothers and Quentin Tarantino.
Or should I say I enjoy their films.
I don’t know much about Film directors,
so take CPs word for it they’re a shower of shite.
I like the story of George Lucas making the original Star wars and getting on the wrong side of the British film crew,
who got bolshy and difficult nearly giving him a nervous breakdown.😁
5
Peter Cushing and Alec Guinness saved Star Wars, along with Gary Kurtz, Lucas’ producer.
3
Never heard of any of these cunts. Dont watch juvenile superhero shite. or cartoons.
13
Neither do I…. (now).
1
I put it all down to drink,drugs and rampant sexual depravity.
What was this about again?
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‘…drink, drugs and rampant sexual depravity.’ Theirs, or yours?
7
Up until the turn of the 2010s I used to be a bit of a film geek/nerd/cunt, watching at least 3 or 4 films (not fucking movies) at the cinema every week, and a shedload more from DVDs and Torrent sites.
So many great directors between the 1930s to the 00s. But they’ve either become worm food or gone woke. Only to be joined by the new kids on the block, some of which are listed above.
Some of them see themselves as the next Big Thing – the next Spielberg, Lucas, Hitchcock, Scorsese or Peckinpah. But none of them come anywhere near because they just don’t know how!
That said, a lot of new directors do want to become edgy and develop old-school ideas. However, the studios tell them to fall into line and follow the Yellow Woke Road or else – just look at the shitfest going on over at Disney!
But there are still plenty of independent directors and studios churning out good solid films. But the problem is getting the films out there to a waiting public given that the studios, cinema chains, TV broadcasters and streaming sites are either all owned by the same companies, or are in cahoots with each other and only release Hollywood-approved films to the masses, while the Indie films are kicked into the long grass.
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‘the next Spielberg, Lucas, Hitchcock, Scorsese or Peckinpah’
As a critic/director (Oliver Stone?) recently observed, the modern generation of directors haven’t lived colourful or dangerous lives, and dont know or talk to anyone outside their LA luvvie bubble, although if you’ve read Peter Biskind’s ‘Easy Riders, Raging Bulls’ Spielberg and Lucas were exceptions and prototypes of the modern ‘geek’ filmmaker, Lucas with his withdrawn demeanour, plaid shirts and only vice was hamburgers.
quite a contrast to producers like Bob Evans snd Don Simpson.
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Back in the 70s I was a great admirer of the then new kids on the block – Lucas, Spielberg, Coppola, De Palma and Paul Schrader = labelled “The Brat Pack”
I recall the even older-school generation of directors from the 40s to 60s regarded the Brat Pack as “Young no-nothing, know-it-alls, who haven’t learnt their trade!”
But to be fair to most of these young kids, they did learn the hard way, taking years to develop their ideas while trying to convince the big studios to take them on – especially Coppola and Spielberg.
His story behind the making of Jaws in 1974/75, was particularly telling as he battled with the bosses at Universal to give him more time and money to finish off what the producers – Zanuck/Brown – thought was going to end up being a B-Movie filler or a support to an A-Movie feature.
Jaws, went way over budget and way over schedule. But the end result was the term “blockbuster” with cinemas packed up and queues stretching for almost a 5th of a mile in some cases. That and the studio picking up over a $billion in revenue over it 40 year life span.
And then of course came Lucas and Star Wars. He went through the same shitfest with Paramount as Spielberg did with Universal 2 years earlier. But the rest is history.
Today I really can’t comment much on the new directors because I just don’t bother anymore. They’re catering for the younger generations and that’s fine I guess.
6
Modern film has gone the same way as modern music, everyone has run out of ideas.
Critics with agendas to push may claim that certain individuals are ‘ground breaking’ or ‘pioneers’, but it’s all bollocks. And of course, wokery has buggered a lot of it up.
Like music hall or skiffle, it’s had its golden age and that’s that.
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Can’t be ‘visionary’ and mainstream. The restrictive requirement of woke make it impossible. I started watching the series about big pharma based on Poe’s ‘The Fall of the House of Usher.’ Within no time at all we had been introduced to tow sets of bum boys – one black, obvs, and a pair of cat flaps. Fuck off.
The Koreans are the only people making decent films. No black or gay quotas, but plenty of original ideas. Looks quite an attractive country too. Going forwards, not backwards.
Good morning, everyone.
11
Personally I feel television over the last 20 years has led to the downfall of cinema.
less interference and smaller budgets when it comes to tv..Good scripts are the key..
You can’t be very visionary when endless studio executives and producers are sticking their oar in every five minutes.
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You can direct a rubbish script but it will still be rubbish. It might look good, be well shot and well acted but if the story and characters are cack, cack you have.
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But not to worry.
The proles will pay and flock to see it, no matter how dire it is.
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I haven’t been to a cinema in years.
1: I’m a tight arsed bastard.
2: I’m fucked if I’ll pay good money to have my senses and intelligence assaulted by the latest CGI driven,Woke heavy “blockbuster” bollocks.
“It’s a cinematic triumph, an epic barnstormer of a movie!” The Guardian.
No it isn’t you lying cunts.
It’s a rehashed, plotless,strobe lit, 500 decibel, billion dollar plane crash of a film. Made worse by shoe horning women, bleks, blek women, kids, blek kids, poofs, lesboids, blek poofs and lesboids etc etc into key roles.
So now I just hit the torrent sites and download the latest and greatest, cast it to the “smart” TV, settle down with Mrs Gripper and wait for my piss to boil.
Which doesn’t take very long.
My wife will sit through just about any cinematic pile of shit going.
She doesn’t appreciate my somewhat noisy but well intentioned critiques and will often cordially invite me to leave the the room.
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Where Josh Trank is mentioned by Cuntamus Prime…the film he’s referring to is called “Chronicle” and is well worth a watch.
A splendid film indeed.
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I don’t go to the cinema any more.
Too loud and with fat cunts sitting nearby stuffing and slurping slurry in their gobs for two hours.
I think not.
Most stuff streamed is shite as well.
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Streaming is a con. More and more ‘content’ is edited for ‘modern audiences’.
I know several people who have go back to physical media.
Same with Kindle and similar.
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Last time for me was 2014. Some woman had a supermarket bag and she kept reaching into it to loudly open packets and munch on the contents.
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Studios and overpaid under-skilled arrogant directors have ruined the cinema. You can’t beat Hitchcock and Kubrick when it comes to film making, the greatest of the great directors in my view.
Jurassic World is worth watching though for some of the magnificent shots of Bryce Dallas’s ample ass provided by the director. Maybe all is not lost.
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Bryce’s arse was it’s only saving grace.
Fuck me, 500 people running up and down the same road for 15 minutes during the aerial attack
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Who directed Debbie does Dallas? Not all directors get the credit they deserve!
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Debbie Does Dallas Part 2 was one of the few films where the sequel was better than the original. The phrase “ it’s delicious “ uttered by a minxy Eurasian bird as she swallowed down a mouthful of baby batter whilst sitting on a pool table became a regular feature at our family Sunday lunches.
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I’d like to see Donald does Bryce Dallas (up the ass).
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I prefer the low budget films with dodgy lighting and a directly delivered although minimal script.
If it has ‘anal’ in the title, even better.
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This innocent film technically has ‘anal’ in the title, Odin:
https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0400000/?ref_=nv_sr_srsg_4_tt_7_nm_1_q_banana%2520land
The write-up is quite apt too!
“A small girl has adventures in her grandmother’s back yard”!!
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Bravo Thomas.
You clearly foresaw the disappointment on my face when I clicked on the link. 🙁
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If you like old-school directors/films, I suggest you try and grab DVDs/BluRays of these films before they become obsolete with the advent of streaming.
DVDs will some be going the same way as VHS tapes. But with streaming it means the TV studios and owners of streaming sites such as Amazon, Netfucked and Disney can censor films all over again. Even 18-rated films are often reedited for woke-approval before being streamed out.
Therefore films like Straw Dogs, Dirty Harry, French Connection et al. They were all originally rated “X” or “18” by the BBFC back in the 70s, primarily because of excessive violence, bad language and sex scenes.
But these same films (and many others) are being censored again to do away with racist, homophobic/transphobic scenes and conversations so as not to offend anyone.
Yes, by all means show someone having their legs amputated with a rusty knife or being gutted with an axe (“Saw” and “Hostel”), but don’t, whatever you do, call them a hurty name!
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Fortunately I was able to foresee the future, with the aid of early dvd recordings from the FilmFour subscription service and even the bbc when normality was key.
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The beeb once went out of their way to shock, before being told what to do. Similar to the way Britain won wars and are now being forced to kowtow.
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Tend to go for real life cinema without a muzak soundtrack, with human everyday individuals that have interesting stories to tell.
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EastEnders.
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Is that bellenders ?
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This is why I only really watch porn.
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Or, as the more artful of those on this esteemed site refer to it, ‘films with extremely graphic adult content’.
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I quite like the new fad for cinema ‘firsts’; eg Nia DaCosta, first black female director to tank a MCU so-called blockbuster full of unlikeable girl boss characters.
Aka ‘The Marvels’.
Morning all.
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You amuse me sometimes Ron, when you pull our pissers.
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and It’ll be ‘men to blame’ when Disney finally pull it.
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Film snobs love to tell us what we’re meant to appreciate because we don’t have the intelligence to work it out for ourselves. We should be admiring the work of Bresson, Tarkovsky, Godard etc because these people are auteurs and if we want to be thought of as intellectuals then we have to agree.
I knew I wasn’t an intellectual after I’d sat through Tarkovsky’s ‘Stalker’ which turned out to be over two and a half hours of boring shite. And I don’t go along with those who favour particular directors and praise every film they make, as though they can do no wrong. I’ve enjoyed lots of films whose directors have then gone on to make real clunkers.
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As soon as you mentioned “film snobs” I instantly thought of that know-it-all cunt Mark Kermode – that pretentious arsehole who loves any old shite, but dresses it up like he’s some kind of cinematic intellectual.
He would probably say “Ms Snow White and the 7 Depraved P3rverts” was on a par with the Godfather and Gone with the bleedin’ Wind!
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Most of those cunts can never explain why though.
Emperors New Clothes.
There was a surprising amount of that guff around some of the Star Wars shite Disney have put out, including The Last Jedi and Andor.
‘You just don’t get it maaan’
Shut up would you. It’s fucking Star Wars mate.
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Yes like that fucking teddy boy lookalike Mark Kermode. Every film he recommended I used to have to avoid like the plague. They were all shit. Thinking about it isn’t a kermode what you have a shit in?
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ah Technocunt beat me to it
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He looks like Ronnie Kray’s bastard love child, if that was possible as Ronnie was as dodgy as a rubber ladder.
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I agreed with Kermode on Silent Running, but nowadays he’ll sing the praises of any anti-Trump/Brexit allegory, such as ‘Don’t Look Up’.
It was smug, tone-deaf, unfunny shite.
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Fair play to him on this one tho;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nunmg2QopP4
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It is a shame that brilliant film makers and critics, are criticised on here.
Get your peepers on the Drogma cinema series, that you don’t know what I’m talking about, obviously.
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Hipster spotted.
They’re films, Sammy. You might as well criticise us for not having heard of your favourite dinosaur.
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In all walks of life C P, the minority subjects are always far superior.
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The majority of cunts on here do my job for me. What they suggest, I simply avoid.
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What is the ‘Drogma cinema series’? Didn’t come up in the search.
Did you mean the Dogme 95 cinematic movement? If so, I did see von Trier’s The Idiots when I was about 20.
It was shite.
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Sorry Prime, my apologies. The Idiots is less likely to be made today. I did give the shy the idea for having sex if pretending to have a screw loose.
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But you did answer the question at the end. Probably too young.
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‘Drogma’
😆
no wonder i’d never heard of it.
Thought somebody had made an anthology about Didier Drogba’s mum.
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Too young?
In the Emperor’s New Clothes it takes the child to point out the obvious.
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Stanley Kubrick, David Lean, Sergio Leone, John Ford, Alfred Hitchcock. Those were the greats.
Cunts now who do all that Marvel shite and just butcher Star Wars and Star Trek are simply sacks of shit who peddle woke crap and treat the art of cinema like video games. Absolute bollocks.
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‘Theme park rides’ is another comparison I quite like (made by Kermode).
A burning yellow wheelie bin of clinical waste is another comparison.
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What I really should be doing is keep to myself the wonders of cinema and not bother any of you that doesn’t appreciate it.
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Courtier’s reply there, Sammy.
‘You just don’t get it…’
Tiresome and hollow, coming from someone who appreciates it enough to butcher the name of it.
Ever seen Jackass?
Very similar to The Idiots, only under the pretense of entertainment rather than revolutionary cinema, and made by those goddamn yanks.
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You still don’t understand.
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