Heather Mills and VBites

(Spot the Mad Cow! – Day Admin)

Heather Mills vegan food company, VBites, has gone bust. Oh dear. Maybe the public just don’t want to buy overpriced dodgy looking crap masquerading as food anymore?

Not according to Heather though. No, this was all a dastardly plan by the meat and dairy industry spreading misinformation (what, that it tastes better?), corporate greed, the cost of living crisis, the evil Tories and…drumroll please…Brexit. No plague of frogs or a Zionist conspiracy? Her dream of turning her native north-east into the “Silicon Valley of plant-based foods” as dead as a week old kale. Mark Zuckerberg won’t be looking over his shoulder just yet.

The aforementioned reasons given are what every business has to deal with and the paying public decided that they would rather eat the packet this shite came in than enrich this whiner. Anyway didn’t this chancer shake down Macca for millions? She should of snagged herself another gullible rich sugar daddy and given her a leg-up to indulge her hobby.

Marrying a Beatle, being vegan and having one leg is all this cunt dines out on. Oh, and now failed business woman.

Let It Pea this is the last we hear of her.

Daily Telegraph

BBC News

Nominated by Liberal Liquidator with additional supporting link from Minge Juice Bottler

75 thoughts on “Heather Mills and VBites

  1. If you took her plastic leg off her she couldn’t run away.

    Mind you who’d want to go where that scouse cunt had been?

    Finally,and incontrovertibly,vegans and their gigantic factories of chemical shite are Ultra Cunts.

    Gas them.

    • The thing is Unkle the vegan cunts produce enough gas as it is eating all those bloody lentils. You could run your oven for a year on what their flatulence.

  2. I’d volunteer to bite her V, but would be too busy worrying about her stump.
    Is it below or above the knee?
    Did she order McCartney to jizz on it?
    Does she use the stump to stir Bolognese made with VBites?

    • Hi Thomas,

      Cut the other leg off to even things up and carry on munching. Unless you cut the top half away and have the cunt & arse as a rucksack. Then you could have the occasional muff dive whilst out walking.

      • This is for anyone to have a go at. You could use her for amusement. Tell her to give you a blowjob and hop to it. When you’ve had enough of her, tell her plain and simple, to hop it.

    • You’re fooling nobody Cunt Engine.

      We all know you’d want her to rub her stump seductively against your legs whilst whispering sweet nothings in your ear.

    • After the collapse of his marriage, McFartney was asked if he’d ever go down on one knee again.

      “That’s a really disrespectful thing to call Heather,” he replied.

  3. Sounds like she doesn’t have a leg to stand on.
    She only went bankrupt because of her balance.

  4. What the fuck had Brexit got to do with selling dodgy vegan fungus food? Surely it’s all sustainable and local etc so what we do with Europe is irrelevant. Unless she’s saying that her clientele are still traumatised by brexit and have decided to eat meat as a result.
    Loopy.

  5. I heard that her leg was hacked off by a ex driven mad for meat after enduring a 5 month vegan diet.

    Dunno how true it is.

    She’s a savvy gold digger and I’m happy that she fleeced turkey necked pensioner McCartney.

    Who needs two legs with that money£££££?

    I’d never walk again if I was as rich as her.

  6. As far as I am concerned she can shove her products where the sun doesn’t shine.Horrible goblin.

  7. She’s right about the meat and dairy industries too.

    Little more than the Mafia.
    Especially Welsh farmers, the Taffia.

    Curdles Luciano
    Baby milk Nelson
    Moojuice Kelly
    And jersey Joe cheese

    • A mate of mine told me about the ‘Taffia’ in and around Swansea while I was visiting.

      Didn’t stop laughing for 5 minutes.

  8. why do all vegans claim that eating animals is murder, yet all vegan products are made to taste like the very same murder?

    • Don’t mention the deforestation their soy produce is causing, either.

      Or the whole abortion thing.

      Pro-abortion (especially in the UK and US) but vegan?
      Upsets them a great deal.

  9. Poor Heather. Now that her company has gone tits up, she’s having to use the bus.
    I saw her at the bus stop the other day and said “how are you getting on?”

  10. The old comments about a vegetarian meal “It would be quite tasty with some meat”, must still be as true now as the time when it was a bit trendy to have a veggie meal.

    Give Heather a Linda McCartney sausage to cheer her up 😂

    • Imagine the McCartney household on the day Linda died…
      “Kids, bit of bad news; your Mother’s dead. On the positive side, it’s real sausages for dinner!”

  11. The Heather Mills Business Plan:
    1. Marry a billionaire.
    2. Divorce billionaire and screw him over for as much as possible.
    3. Use this money to start a business using an idea nicked from the billionaire’s first wife.
    4. Open a factory making inedible ‘food’ out of sawdust and dry rot, then sell it at twice the price of the competition.
    5. Use your media connections to generate free publicity and believe your own bullshit.
    6. When the Company goes tits up blame everyone else but yourself.
    7. Find another billionaire and return to stage 1.

    • If she’s down to her last few bob, she could always write that explosive ‘bombshell’ book revealing all, about how she’d married Billy Shears, and the real Macca died in a car crash in ’66.

      How McShears was a tight cunt who had never written a decent song, and that.

      Allegedly.

  12. I don’t know if I’ve ever had any vegan food but I did once try some vegetarian sausages and they were very nice. And twice the price of pork so it’s a no go.

    • I would like the meat producers to try and gain business from the vegan/vegetarian cunts. These wankers call their veggie food after meat products, so maybe the meat companies could produce Beef Tofu, or Chicken nut roast???

  13. Just to show there’s no hard feelings, Macca bought her a plane for Christmas.
    But she’ll use a razor on the other leg.

    I’ll get me coat.

  14. I don’t really give a shit if people don’t want to eat meat or animal products. That’s their choice.

    I respect their choice, but they also need to respect my choice to eat meat and eggs and drink milk.

    That’s just it though isn’t it.

    If I were to force them to eat meat or drink milk they’d make me out to be some sort of fascist and they would have a point.

    Surely then by the same logic, if they were to force me to become vegan and not wear leather shoes, that would make them fascists.

    Oh no sorry I forgot, they are categorically right about everything all of the time.

    Bollocks.

    • There are ethical considerations to eating meat that do not apply to the eating of plants.
      The most obvious being that in order to eat meat sentient creatures (not dissimilar to ourselves) have to be killed, and all are too often cruelly treated prior to execution.
      Whereas the eating of plants does not involve any of said barbarity.
      I could go on but sense I’d be wasting my time here.
      PS: I am neither a vegan nor a vegetarian.

      • My mum’s old friend runs a dog rescue charity and used to be a vegan, but the diet made her ill.

        She now draws the line at ‘things with a face’.

        My thought on it is would it still be more moral to eat beef or lamb than octopus, given the octopus is arguably more intelligent, but lacks a face?

  15. Ptocessed Vegan food is pretty foul, but then so is eating a slaughtered animal. I’d rather eat this münter’s grisly, old minge than a butchered cow’s rump. Probably taste the same and certainly smell the same.

  16. My grandson has gone vegan. I no longer speak to him. Hes a lefty cunt too.
    After all the life lessons i gave him as a child; how to make gunpowder, how to make booby traps with pipe bombs, oh the list is endless. the little cunt goes all fucking woke. Ungreatfull little twat.

    • Mr Cunt engine makes booby traps all the time. I’ve asked for some tips. I’ve only got the cellophane across a car wash fed into the side rollers and coated with cyanoacrylate, perfect for the Surrey mums.

  17. As I like to collect rare and interesting objects, I offered Heather 50 grand for her foot a couple of days after her accident and she accepted.
    As it was sat there on the coffee table, I was considering what to do with it and had a eureka moment.
    Collecting one of my ‘guests’ from Hotel Fritzl (my love cellar), I performed some wonderfully advanced microsurgery to create this beauty:
    https://images.app.goo.gl/noENfaZKiAizwqGA7
    With hindsight, I probably ought to have included a spunk drain plug. It’s getting a little full.

  18. Well, I would still fuck her in the shitter then let her piss on me……on one leg.

    Afternoon everyone.

  19. She had an handsome set of norks before a breast reduction I seem to remember, sure there are photos of em out there but I dont have the technical ability to post.

  20. ‘Lick me out, she moaned.
    Cocking her wooden leg in the air.’

    A fantasy of mine.

  21. A trick I learned from count Arthur Strong is to have nice pork sausages for the meat and some veggie sausages as the veg for dinner. Healthy.

  22. Hooked that daft old cunt Macca, got up the duff by the silly old Scouse sod, and that kid is her meal ticket for life. I’ve rarely seen a trap better planned and executed.

    It’s nearly as clinical (and as cynical) as Yoko Fucking Ono reeling in that other daft gullible Beatle cunt.

  23. Ringo cracked it. Screwing The Spy Who Loved Me era Barbara Bach.

    I can imagine old Pete Best grumbling with bitterness ‘Fucking cunt! That should have been me!’

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