London Rickshaws

Posted on by

 
These tourist traps and tasteless monstrosities richly deserve a cunting.

London traffic is bad enough without these things clogging up the streets. They are an eyesore and a traffic hazard. Selfridges on Oxford Street, as well as other areas, seems to be a meeting place for them. There they can be seen in all their tasteless glory, bicycle rickshaws in various revolting hues and decor, some with pink fur lined interiors and fluffy dice, most blasting out tasteless Arabic or Latino dance music at ear splitting volumes. These contraptions are nearly always driven by shady Middle Eastern or South American types and they have the driving skills to prove it.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, the contraptions are uninsured, unlicensed and unregulated. There are tourist nightmare stories of gullible fools getting into these and being charged a few hundred pounds with menaces at the end of the journey. And how tourists can be seen in these embarrassing conveyances is difficult to understand. I would have to put a brown paper bag over my head.

These things belong in the Third World, not London. Oh, hang on, London is the Third World….

Metro

Nominated by MMCM.

40 thoughts on “London Rickshaws”

  1. Being charged hundreds of pounds for a ride of a couple of hundred meters in a deathtrap sums London in all its third world glory up nicely.

    Best quote from one of these cunts who charged some Dutch tourists a few hundred quid to go from Marble arch to Oxford Street; ‘I work my legs hard and play good music’.

    Well, there you go. Totally worth being ripped off blind.

    Fortunately they are about to be banned as they aren’t insured for fare paying passengers.

  3. I think they are supposed to appeal to the tanning salon brass who go ¨üp West” once a week to buy cheap tat from the clothes shops, who, if they could afford it, would take a white stretched limo. Brazen trollosp who enjoy the cheap music coming out of the bass laden smart speakers. A monument to chav vulgarity.

    • Last time I went to London I struggled to hear anyone English. All foreigners- tourists, shop workers, street cleaners, even cabbies seem to be foreign now. What a fucking shit-hole.

  4. These cunts are probably also living close to central London, probably in some grenfell type facility, otherwise they wouldn’t be able to get the cunting rickshaws to where they hustle. Probably sub-letting of some other foreign scroungers.

  5. why would tourists in London think a rickshaws a good way to see the sites?

    you want a black hackney cab driven by a cockney in a flat cap surely?

    if I went to Venice I wouldn’t hire a trails bike.

    or a donkey ride in Milan.

    A swarthy ethnic pedalling a mongrel bicycle isn’t a good form of transport anyway .
    probably a sex offender?!

    Like prince Andrew.

    • If I was ever to visit the tourist spectacle of your country cream gate Mis, it would be by being piggybacked on a stout washer woman called Elsie.

  6. I know from experience that Yanks tend to think that Londonstabistan is full of red telephone boxes, geezers with umbrellas and bowler hats and a swirling fog descends on the city at night. It’s all those old films they’ve watched you see.
    It must be a great disappointment to find it’s just a third world shithole full of w*gs trying to pick your pocket and rip you off. Oh well…….that’s progress.

  7. I wonder if a future Mare(!) of Londonstan might be the son/daughter of a rickshaw ‘driver’…

  8. Anyone who comes to London for fun deserves everything coming to them..

    Third world toilet run by a inbred smelly brown goblin..

    still nice to see labour unravelling..

  9. It won’t be long before we have auto-rickshaws (tuk-tuks) chugging it round like in New Delhi, although SuckDiq won’t like the black pollution they dispense. We’ve already imported lots of third world delights.
    Next: shitting in the street

    • They might be electrically powered, with Sadiq’s face beaming from a poster on the back. It will suit the demographic of brown poor cunts and green posh cunts.

  10. If you were to try and put one of those things on the streets in any other capital city in the world the police would arrest you and probably crush the fucking thing.

    You would get fined and you certainly would not get your rick shaw back.

    I suppose that the same thing would have happened in London if a group of young white entrepreneurs would have thought up the scheme.

    • You’re half right.

      My old paperboy in Roskilde branched out into rickshaw driving in Copenhagen. a six man rickshaw with battery power and a meeting table no less.

      Apparently he was doing brisk trade until the police pulled him for having no taxi licence, no insurance and no equivalent of an MoT. Which isn’t particularly surprising, because he’s black.

  11. Suckdick will be all for this third-world, bud-bud dingery.

    Councils will be empowered to issue rickshaw licences to operators who are insured and charge the ‘correct’ fares. Only rickshaws with licences will be allowed to legally ply their trade.

    The annual licence cost? I guess around £3,000, priced just below the cost of the congestion charge.

    Ker-ching. The brown goblin coins it in again.

  13. Take a look at the delightful Rickshaws in this Time Out article. Like something from a Hieronymous Bosch painting, peddling the damned to their rendezvous with the Devil.

    Not for much longer will we hear the freindly banter of the London cabbie. Now it will be (in a thick Arabic accent) “I ad’ that Diane Abbot in the back of the Rickshaw once”.

    Cunts.

    London is finished.

    https://www.timeout.com/london/news/westminster-council-is-cracking-down-on-rogue-rickshaws-in-central-london-102722

  14. By coincidence……

    One of the beaches near to me used to have car parks close to the shore.
    It’s a beautiful beach with many thousands of visitors every day.

    The car parks were shut to protect the sand dunes so the only access is a walk of about a kilometre and a half from other car parks.

    Cycling is a national sport in Spain and there are dozens of cycling clubs in most areas.

    So I made enquiries.

    Importing rick shaws is not difficult or restrictive.
    I already had an import licence for my main company.
    You can get rick shaws from India.
    I didn’t need covered ones as no rain protection would have been needed.

    A cycling club was enthusiastic.
    Getting paid for riding was a bonus and hauling passengers back and forth is good exercise.

    I had a trusted friend who would have run the business.
    4 euros for a return trip as long as the return part was before 6pm.

    Then I applied to the local council for a permit.

    Spanish red tape is notorious.

    I would have needed licenses, insurance, roadworthy certificates and dozens of other restrictions.

    This was for a rural area but the cunts in London can ply their dodgy trade without any permits, it would seem.

  17. I’m a welder fabricator by trade and the last company I worked for before moving to spain made anything and everything. I have to admit that we had an order to make a batch of these things and yours truly made them. Sorry lads, don’t throw anything too big or smelly at me.

  18. Put a couple of uv tubes in next to the pink faux fur and hey presto! A mobile tanning salon. Classy.

  19. This is a problem which became glaringly obvious years ago and should have been sorted by the law makers years ago. Why should it be OK for them to be totally unregulated? Any cabbie can tell you how tight the regs are on him and what will happen to him if he transgresses. Another anomaly is pizza delivery riders on mopeds who appear to run on L plates permanently and never take a test. Many of them are incompetent and a danger to themselves and others. Requiring a full licence to hold the job should be a basic requirement. I can’t think of another job where you would not be required to have a minimum standard in a necessary skill.

  21. Giving Donkey Back Rides without the donkey, would be less of a nuisance, cheaper and a lot quieter.

      • Indeed CP. There’s a lot the BBC have to answer for:

        The Fast Show – sailed close to the wind
        Lenny Henry – nig on nog and stereotyping poor Jamaicans
        Rastamouse – getting high off cheese and not very PC
        Savile – say no more…

  23. Suckdick will love this, and will insist that anyone earning less than £100k per year must travel by one of these things or rough it on public transport.

    He, on the other hand, will still be travelling in his bullet-proof limo, or whatever luxurious gas-guzzling car he tootles about in.

    And can you imagine all those eco-loons, JSO knobheads and woke celebs travelling by rickshaw in order to save the planet? No, neither can I!

    Of course if you make a complaint against these drivers, you’ll be accused of being racist given that most of them are not of these shores, shall we say!

Comments are closed.