Royal fans (2)

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I’d like to nominate ‘Royal fans’ and the newspaper stories where they ‘go wild’ because Kate Middleton had a ladybird land on her arm or some other such innocuous nonsense.

The royal family, like all truly rich people, utterly despise their subjects and quite rightly so. The average Ant and Dec or Strictly watching, shopping at Iceland moron ought to be abhorred.

Even if you think they like you, they don’t, as bloodnutted royal arse-kisser Nicholas Witchell found out when he heard then Prince Charles referring to him as ‘that awful man’.

Does King Charles have even an ounce of respect for the flunky who wipes his backside for him or puts the toothpaste on his brush? Of course not.

This lot are even more pathetic than the sort of twat who worships regular celebrities, who might, at least, acknowledge where they’ve come from.

Grow a spine and stop simpering over chinless inbreds who’d step over you if you were having a heart attack without even thinking to order their servant to call you an ambulance.

Daily Fail

Nominated by Thomas the Cunt Engine.

76 thoughts on “Royal fans (2)”

  2. Charles was waiting decades to become King.
    You would think that over that time he would have formulated some ideas on how he wants to present himself as monarch.

    Since his coronation has he actually done anything at all?
    Has anyone even seen him?

  3. I have met these types – they’re the trainspotter versions for royalty, and probably spend all their waking hours scanning the media for the latest bit of news about TRF and go into orgasm when Charles waves at them in a crowd of other sad cunts.

    They would argue its only a bit of harmless fun, but when you visit their homes and every room (including the bog, probably) is coated with RF memorabilia, you just know they’re oddballs and will probably stab you in the eye if you deign to criticise any of them – even Sparkletits herself!

    That said, I do have full-size nude pics of Kate Middleton from her OnlyFans secret-society pages; I even have an exclusive pic of her going down on Migraine, and signed by both of them.

    She’s a right old goer, is our Kate!

    • I can’t see the attraction of Kate Middleton.

      She is plain and skinny.
      No meat on her at all.

      It must be like fucking a bin bag full of coat hangers.

  4. The institution of royalty just baffles me. How does it survive year in, year out? What purpose does it serve? Why should I feel loyalty towards it or indeed, identify with it in any way whatsoever?

    • The answer is simple : it’s a lot cheaper than President Blair…

      • I don’t know Dio, a lot of the cost of the monarchy is hidden in various other budgets. All heads of state cost eye-watering sums but the point is we could elect a replacement for President Blair. Also Blair’s reputation is so low I think I could beat him in an election.

      • It’s not just the cost and the royal family bring in tourist revenue.
        Just imagine another self serving lying 🤥 politician with goodness knows what powers.
        Scary stuff

  6. Bert and Doris Nutter stood patiently waiting in the rain for the chance to wave a plastic union flag at a carriage with a disinterested chinless German in it?

    Not for me.

  7. They are not just the royal family of Great Britain.
    They are the royal family of more than a dozen other countries.

    I bet that none of those other countries have to contribute to the pleasure of having a royal family.
    Just the UK.

    If they are so good for tourism then they should be fucked off to Tuvalu or Papua New Guinea where their tireless efforts will be better appreciated.

    Give them mud huts to live in and pay them slightly more than the average wage.

    Useless, scrounging, six toed cunts.

  8. Surely the height of crazy royalty worship was when Y shaped coffin Diana snuffed it? For a few weeks there this country went absolutely batshit crazy. I can only describe it as mass hysteria and you had to be there to believe it.
    Totally fucking mental!

    • Fortunately I was living in Denmark at the time.

      Unfortunately there was nothing but maudlin ‘Princess of hearts’ bullshit on TV for two weeks.

    • Indeed; that incident can be flagged as the point that the English people became worthy of contempt.
      You remember the size of that sea of flowers?
      Ridiculous.
      My sister cried for 2 weeks after Diana died. Probably not helped by me asking her if she was “some sort of spastic?”!
      Oh, and thanks for posting my nom, Admin.

    • None of you could do what Diana did.

      Being Chauffeur driven around the World First Class Shaking the Hands of Aids victims with a Barge Pole & Standing a Mile from a Mine Field with a ‘How Awful expression on her face’

      The skill she has for that can’t be Bought

    • I was living near the Shand-Kydd* place when Diana snuffed it. I clearly remember absolutely nothing happening. The papers were full of it. The radio was full of it. But nobody on the street gave a fuck. Not a flag, not a bunch of flowers, not a tearstained message written in crayon by an obsessed mong and pinned to a teddy bear. It was really heartwarming. (There was more local concern when Frances Shand-Kydd later got done for drunken driving, but the charges were mislaid by the polis so that was ok.)

      * her mother, for those who don’t know.

  9. In the middle ages when people thought a monarch was by divine right of God,
    They believed a touch from the king could cure ailments such as scrofula and plague .

    Prince Andrew would of loved it.

    • Morning MNC…I believe that a hands-on experience from Kate Middleton might cure my balls from being full of jizz.

      • Morning Thomas👍

        Kate seems nice enough but not much in the tit department.

        I prefer a bit of meat on a lass
        Not all skin an bone
        like the leftovers of David Lammys KFC

  10. OT. Hopefully this is the weekend when the Gaza Strip gets bulldozed into the sea.

    Come on you four by two’s !

    Now’s your time 🇮🇱

    Go get those fucking rag heads 👍

    • Morning Jack.
      Out of the Israelis vs Palestinians
      and
      Russia vs Ukraine
      Which conflict do you give less of a shit about and are sick to death of hearing about?!

      • Morning Thomas. That’s a difficult question to answer.

        As I despise the Ivan’s and rag heads pretty much the same.

        The rag heads by a short head.

        Ideally, after sorting out the Palestinian Johnnie’s out. Israel should send Iran back to the Store Age.

        It’s where they belong.

        Cunts.

    • Thanks for the heads up, Jack.

      This means at some point this weekend, assorted Al-headbags and their blue hair allies will be marching down Kensington high Street.

      Time to dig out my IDF t-shirts. That really pisses them off.

    • Little bit baffled by the assumptions here:
      Is grabbing other peoples’ land and dispossessing the original legal owners (a) A Good Thing -hooray for Israel or (b) A Bad thing- boo for Russia?

      Just asking.

  11. I’d be quite a fan if they went full Henry VIII,smashed fuck out of “the government”,raised a peasant army and drove all the illegals into the sea at the point of a bayonet.

    Then I’d have a twenty foot Royal Standard atop my country cottage..

    Til that happens they are no better than benefit cheats with expensive hats.

    Oh and fuck the mentals who fawn over them.

    Morning Gents.

  12. My favourite Royal fan was the late The Lord Norman St John-Stevas. Member of Queen Maggies, Cabinet he made Jacob Rees-Mogg look and sound like a docker. His specialist subject was the analysis of constitutional issues as they pertained to the monarchy. If there was an etiquette involved, St John-Stevas had it off pat. A limp- wristed caricature? Maybe, but he knew what had to be done if the Prince of Wales farted in public ie St-John Stevas would cover up by saying ‘Excuse me!’ Fucking brilliant, I bet the Royals miss the mad cunt.

    Good morning, everyone.

    • Just as sad and pathetic are the royal ‘experts’ whose vacuous observations and lofty opinions ceaselessly foul the already despicably vile and sycophantic Dailies Express and Mail. Who the fuck gives a shit? If the royal family were to go this shower of sad bastards would have to go too. IMHO the only expert royal is Andrew, Prince of Shaggers.

  14. Gold plated parasites in my book, they even have the lowest of the low characters/cunts and scandles Andrew, Fergie and their inbred looking daughters, Halfwitt Harry Hewitt, his gold digging whore and their stories, Charlie boy and Diana, Phillip the Greek waysist and these dodgy, scamming, lying collection of cunts are the head of the country.
    The queen had some respect from me but honestly the only thing the rest are good for ripping the piss out of on Spitting image and Southpark, they serve no purpose, cost a fortune and are a huge embarrassment, get rid of the cunts.

  15. “The royal family, like all truly rich people, utterly despise their subjects” Really? How the fuck would you know?

    • Apparently they call us great unwashed ” Grockels”.

      Not sure what that means?
      But I object to it.

      Cheeky kraut fuckers

    • You think the royal family like the British people?
      Don’t be so utterly ridiculous.

      • Do you think anyone in a position of power gives a fuck about the people?

        The conservatives sure don’t, Labour despise the white working class more than anything else.

        Once some cunt gets a sniff of power or fortune the ladders are pulled up and it becomes us and them.

  16. Either they are the top echelon of the shadow government who eat rodents and drink children’s blood or they are a leftover from history who now function is the focus of our national identity.

    The royal family could be abolished tomorrow and nothing would improve. The country would still need a head of state and you can be sure the money we spend on the royals would still be spent on pomp and grandeur.

    As Dio points out we’d end up with a president Blair or more probably at the moment some ethnic in their place. The royals give a sense of continuity that a president wouldn’t.

    However with the passing of the queen the remaining members of the family don’t inspire much confidence that any of them understand the importance of the role or have the necessary strength of character to fulfil it adequately with the sense of duty required.

    Charles seemingly wanted to be king without doing the hard work his mother dedicated her life to when she became monarch.

    At the moment the royal family are still my preference, I can’t abide the idea of us going full US and having a Biden like head of state.

  17. Now the Queen is dead, I see some sanity regarding these useless cunts has emerged. The sort who fawn over royalty are the sane sort of gimp who banged pots and pans with spoons for the National Covid Service, and gurgle with glee over the likes of Strictly and Gogglebox

    Senile feeble old cunts. They really do think the royals are great people because of birthright.

    Such people belong in the 1100s, snivelling, grovelling, doffing their caps and launching their shit out onto dirt roads. They are that backward. They bang on about President Blair as a n autonomous reflex but dont have the awareness to realise he would need to be voted for, so embedded is their desire for an unelected ruler.

    The fault is not with the idea of a republic or president, it is their limited imagination, which is how they became the cheerleaders of royalty in the first place.

    Good nom, Mr Cunt Engine.

  18. WTF as Skidmarkle to do with the Royal family? She will be be POTUS in 2028.. than she can really go to town on the white supremacist Limeys.
    Only joking, the cunt.
    Beautiful morning here, I hear the Jocks are flooded…..

  19. Legend has it, that Catherine the Great was regularly fucked by a horse. How’s that for Trooping the Colour.

  20. Make the most of them, they are the only white people in the top job in this country at the moment.

    Though that will change soon enough..

    Collect some of that DNA off one of the stonehenge builders and bingo meet new King jaffa umbongo..

    • Sophie Edinburgh looks really filthy.
      She must need some serious poke, being married to that down-market Noel Coward.
      Meanwhile, the new monarch – Talbot!!!) looks increasingly. Like Dobby the wanksock elf…

  22. The people who fawn over the royals also presumably lap up the celebrity stories too. They want to read all about their wonderous achievements.
    The Daily Fail had 12 different stories about the Beckhams the other day.

    • Did they have one why he chose not to sue Rebecca Loos despite suing everyone else for libel when he’s had the need to do so ?

  23. I shop at Iceland
    Oh dear!
    Can’t say i’ve ever watched strictly though, i suspect my brain would implode.

  27. God save the king? Fuck the king I say, verily a cunt among cunts. And the same goes for every Daily Mail reader, they are all cunts to a man as well. Royals and royalist tosspots alike!

  28. Only thick people think they do a lot for British tourism . Paris is visited by more holidaymakers than London and they headjobbed their Royal family a long while ago

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