Michael Barrymore

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Another decade on from his fall from grace, whinging queen Barrymore, of Strike It Duckie, and swimming pool fame, whines that he wants to be back on the telly doing what he does best – getting on the tits of ITV viewers

“The people feel they know me” he cries – well, they knew the faintly camp, ingratiating figure who took the piss out of old ladies on ancient game shows. Yes the people know him for that and as an annoying twat that fell from grace over alleged sordid behaviour years ago.

There is nothing worse than an elderly po of desperately trying to get off JSA and back into the limelight, totally devoid of self respect. He is yesterday’s man and he would do better to fuck off and just enjoy the easy money he gets from the DWP.

Express

Nominated by W. C. Boggs.

73 thoughts on “Michael Barrymore”

  1. Barrymores my kind of hot-tub sounds like a ratings winner..

    First guests ant and dic.
    A tush tucker challenge.

  2. Can’t really agree with this cunting. Michael Barrymore is/was very funny. Loved his Kangaroo dance. Brilliant on ‘Seaside Special’ and ‘Strike it Lucky’. My sister in law does an ace impression of him. A colossus of comedy. ‘Allwight!?’ That Lubbock business was a real bummer,

  3. Maybe a revamp of ‘Through the Bumhole’ or Blind Rape’?

    Or maybe ‘The Chase’ where if you lose you get Lubbocked by Mark Labbett.

    Survey says…. you are a washed-up old poof.

  4. I am going to make a prediction that he will be given a part in Eastenders.

    Wait and see.

  5. Anchor the Bibby Stockholm in his swimming pool. The fuckers won’t dare try to escape when they find out what’ll happen to them if they do.

    • Perhaps he could be the entertainment officer on The Bibby Stockholm a sort of Seaside Special 👍

  6. The biggest mistake he ever made was working for the wrong network.
    If he’d worked for the BBC he’d have been protected and great efforts made to cover up his misdemeanours.
    Plus, he could have moved into politics by using social media to hold forth about his political views, under the shield of being ‘freelance’ and therefore unsackable.
    Silly bugger.

    • Very true, untouchable by the law obviously., bet he would have got through a few runners. Fuck off Barrymore you had it and blew it in every way possible, now stop whinging and take it like a man.

    • Exactly. No cunt under 60 will recognise him.
      Then again no cunt under 60 still watches terrestrial channels.

  9. He gets people asking him when he’ll be back on TV?
    Who? senile old cunts?

    Barrymore hasnt been on TV in a generation.

    Who is he kidding?

    Fuck off and live out the rest of hour life with whatever dignity you salvaged after the swimming pool adventure.

    Sad old cunt.

  13. Suggest he checks into the Huw Edwards’ Ward for Mental Health issues.

    Will have him back on TV faster than he can say top, middle or bottom

  14. That Stuart Lubbock story is extremely murky business.

    You’d think Barrymore would keep a low profile really. Not want to be on the telly.

    • “…You’d think Barrymore would keep a low profile really. Not want to be on the telly….”

      You’d think so but such a desire would only apply to people who are emotionally, psychiatrically and socially normative. The thing to remember about Buggermore is that his defining characteristic is his ego. THAT is the character trait to which all other traits, emotional responses and behaviours such as self restraint, regret, shame embarassment, honesty etc are subservient. it is a mediated form of psychopathy.

  16. If he really wants to get back on tv might I suggest he murders Tony Blair “only joking ” should get him plenty of coverage.

    • Lead item on the BBC News website at the moment.
      How many people have died today because the doctors are on strike? No mention of that, but why would there be? Those victims are British, so they don’t matter.

    • Just wait for the ‘migrants welcome’ mob to hold a fucking vigil

      The French side of the channel, fuck all to do with us, if they didn’t allow all these cunts to wander around Calais and inflate fucking enormous rubber dinghies all this shit would go away.
      These ‘boats’ can be seen from space 😂

    • “BBC News – Migrant boat sinks in Channel killing six people”
      = work in progress

      Don’t cross the channel in a dinghy = Zero chance of drowning
      I save my sympathy for those that deserve it.

      Same for cunt’s who go mountaineering and then ther’s heavy snow and a team have to risk their lives to find and rescue them …. Fuck that. You make your bed – you lie in it.
      One less dumb fuck

  18. Maybe in these days of tolerance to the lgbt lot he could host a tea time slot game show to see how far celebrity Gay contestants can take a oiled baseball bat up their shitter.!

    • Wanksock, it seems, is going to be participating in Celebrity SAS. I hope he has a fatal accident, the disgusting sleazeball.

  20. Fucking saucy bent cunt, should have been locked up years ago. But let’s not forget the role of the useless star struck coppers here. They failed to secure the crime scene and allowed evidence to be removed. The whole thing was a fucking shambles. Barrymore definitely struck it lucky and if I was him I’d stick to cruising for rent boys and keep my dirty mouth shut.
    Cunt.

  21. If anyone is interested, it is half time between England and Columbia ((girls footie), 1 – 1

    There is whole different meaning to between the ‘lines’ , I hope someone has checked the medical bag of the Columbian trainer 😂

  22. Come on Columbia and to make it a good double, that Barrymore croaks it on his return.

  24. How’s about a new show where he goes out to the Channel with the RNLI and whoops with delight at every sinking bathtub rammed with 300 zillion goat shaggers?
    I know , very harsh – only 6 confirmed washed and another 10 hiding from the soap…..
    PS, why are the RNLI bringing back the cunts when they are only a few miles from Francekistan?

  25. Comedy legend.

    Poor man’s Lenny Bruce.
    I couldn’t breathe with mirth at his catchphrase

    ” Alwioght! Don’t tell yer dad!”

    Sadly missed from Saturday night.

    Better than that cunt Jim Davidson.
    Fuck me.
    Like finding a growth on your bollocks.

    Nick nick? Get fucked🖕

    • In my book Barrymore is up there with your greats.
      Bernie Clifton
      Your Duncan Norvelle
      Your Sid Little.
      Roger Decourcey.

      But that Jim Davidson.☹️
      He was always ‘ entertaining the troops ‘
      Wasn’t he?

      Jesus.
      I’d of surrendered to the Argentinians if expected to sit through his act.👎

  26. My kind of music was brilliant when he did the musical interlude, I don’t know if he was taking the piss or thought he could sing.

    But I remember a version of call me al and I had tears of laughter running down my face.

    Never been able to find a clip.
    Now I’m worried that I made the whole thing up..

  27. Another digression.
    On whale tongues arrival at Bayern, his first word was achtung ! He nearly drowned the press.

  28. How about a remake of the Brittas Empire with Michael Barrymore as Gordon Britas the manager of a Leisure Centre?

    Too soon?

  29. Last I heard he was working at Homebase. Maybe he and a few other Saturday night entertainers should create a cinematic universe – they could use CGI to bring back Bruce and Cilla.

  30. Barrymore: Former Butlins Redcoat. New Faces winner 1983. John Cleese impersonator without O-levels, A-levels or a degree.

    Career nose-dived in 2001. In 18 short years he lost it. No way back from that. But he had £2m and a house with a pool. Probably gets repeat fees from Challenge TV for repeats of Strike It Lucky and the rebranded Strike It Rich. Become rich with £1000 prize money? I don’t think so. Pissed off he missed hosting Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.

    Talentless cunt. I’ve been to Haven recently and the “Animation Team” (teenagers that dress up in animal suits for the kids) are actually talented and can sing and dance and not just say “awright”. Fuck off to Spain and start up a grape farm.

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