Jimmy Osmond

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Perhaps one for Christmas, Admin?

LITTLE JIMMY OSMOND, CUNT OF CHRISTMAS PAST

For those of you who haven’t yet clocked up your half century, a brief explanation. The Osmonds were a singing group of five American brothers, mainly popular with pre-pubescent girls in the 1970s. As a prog rock fan at the time I could barely stand them. However it went from bad to worse when the runt of the litter, ‘Little Jimmy’, was foisted upon the world with this musical abomination. It topped the UK singles charts at Christmas 1972:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YriPIujLtsA

Maybe I’m being a bit unkind to nominate a 9-year-old as a cunt, but fifty years on I find myself still filled with an urge to violently rearrange his porcine features. So please indulge me and allow a 50-year anniversary cunting.

Merry Christmas all.

(Go easy, the poor cunt had a stroke in 2018 – NA)

Nominated by : Geordie Twatt

97 thoughts on “Jimmy Osmond”

  1. All kids need a good slap these days but Little Jimmy and his brothers back then deserved a fucking good kicking. Weren’t they Mormons or something like that? Bunch of wholesome grinning toothy cunts anyway.
    I seem to remember they had a sister who was a bit of a sort.

  2. No, no, no !! How can you object to “I’ll be your long haired lover from Liverpool” ? Ok – maybe you can. But Jimmy wasn’t the obnoxious one – that was Donny and Marie with their abominable show.

    If I remember correctly, the Osmonds were Mormons.

  3. A stroke eh !.
    I’d stroke him,gently,with a lead pipe.
    And yes,comfort Marie afterwards.

    • Crazy Horses!!!

      Poor little Jimmy,
      He had no choice,
      He was in a orthodontic singing cult.

      Hated by smelly flare wearing Joss stick burning Camel fans,
      Well, punk wiped that shite clean.

      RIP Jet Black.

      https://youtu.be/OYqllpnyWrY

      • Very toothy they were. Mind you so were the Gibbs.

        If they had done a song together all smiling…

        Talking of teeth. Was watching Celebs go dating last night. And they all had those plastic shiny ‘turkish teeth’.

        I miss a mouthful of mangled up yellow ones.

        As rare as ‘hen’s teeth’ now.

        Morning Miserable

      • Morning Miles👍

        I find those ‘turkey teeth’ really odd!

        Nowadays everyone wants to be a Osmond.

        Americans would stand aghast at my teeth,
        Crooked ones, loads missing, all a healthy yellow.

        I don’t really smile, I leer Miles.
        Like Ben Gunn.😃

      • You don’t happen to have a piece of cheese about you, Miserable? Many’s a long night I’ve dreamt of cheese – toasted mostly. 😂

      • Yes I watched it DCI. I apologise for the revelation.

        There was one moment when there was two couples talking.

        All had turkey teeth. Beaming they were were. Shining.

        Like electric neon smiles.

  5. I am a whisker too young to remember little Jimmy’s dirge first time around, but I do recall watching the sickly Donny and Marie show.

    Didn’t Marie end up doing some tacky hard-core porn? My old memory might be confusing her with someone similarly ‘wholesome’.

    Little Jimmy deserved to be thrown to Big Jimmy (now then), for this festive abomination.

    • I think a lot were bought as Christmas presents by grannies for their grandchildren.
      A few years later when the kids became teenagers they would have faced acute embarrassment when their mates discovered this in their record collection. So in 1980 a lot of them got their own back on gran by buying ‘There’s no one quite like grandma’, another musical atrocity worthy of a cunting in it’s own right.

      • Trouble was, granny actually liked the tune and when she wasn’t humming it she was playing the friggin record.

  8. Cunt of Christmas past? Surely that’s the preserve of that fucking wrinkly old Op YewTree dodger, Cliff ‘Capt Colostomy’ Richard! Mistletoe and Wine? Fuckoff, you wrong ‘un!

  9. History books like everyone to think that 70’s kids lived on a diet of Ziggy Stardust, Marc Bolan and The Sex Pistols. If only!
    Every time I looked at the telly it was Cleo Laine, Bonny Langford, Dame Cliff, The Osmonds and little Jimmy.
    The strikes, power cuts and regular IRA attacks had nothing on those fuckers when it came to lowering the nations morale.
    Oh well. At least we had Tiswas.

      • Savile and Glitter once performed a spitroast on a young Sophie Raworth.
        Which sounds terrible, but she was the one who initiated it, the dirty trollop.

      • Pete Townsend , Pictures of willie and the kids are alright.
        Definitely a cry for help or acceptance

      • And Townsend’s ‘A Quick One’

        🎶
        My name is Ivor,
        I’m an engine driver
        Please take a sweet
        Come take a walk with me
        We’ll sort it out
        Back at my place, maybe
        It’ll come right
        Why not be nice to an old engine driver
        Better be nice to an old engine driver 🎶

        Very topical.

        Morning Fenton. 😂

    • Mormons are fond of polygamy,
      No not sex with parrots,
      Having multiple wives.

      Not sure why?
      Sounds a recipe for disaster if you ask me.

      They’re heretics that live in Utah, America.

      They can’t have any stimulants,
      So no coffee
      No fizzy pop.
      The only thing they’re allowed are those vibrating eggs you shove up your bum.

      They all use them.

  10. I always have a problem with Xmas music per se’- especially those darkies who get all excited with things like “I Saw Mommy (sic) Kissing Santa Claus” – were the screechy voices harsh voiced wimminz or pansy boys?.

    All Xmas songs are an abomination

  11. good old Tiswas. I had the great pleasure of standing behind the buxom prick teasing co-presenter, Sally James, as part of and audience of other kids gawping at her tight arse and even tighter t shirts

    We also got “christened” by the phantom flan flinger and a bucket of cold water and a fake flan cake meant for Sally.

    she ducked and me and a few others got soaked. All good fun though and Sally and Chris Tarrant used to swear like troopers during the ad breaks.

    I got a free and very rare Tiswas t-shirt for my troubles.

    the only downside was that cunt Lenny Henry playing the black man for laughs. How times change. Anyway fuck him and his hypocrisy.

    good old Sally.

    • I’m torn when it comes to tiswas. The image of Lenny Henry keeps popping into mind, like massively unfunny racist prick who thinks he somehow important in the entertainment business.

  12. The Osmans appealed to a very niche market of plain, boring pre-pubescent girls.
    The type that only hang out with other plain, boring pre-pubescent friends.

    These girls quickly realised that they would never get fingered or even have their tits mauled by any boy while they remained Osman fans.

    The girls blossomed and the popularity of the Osmans rapidly went down the pan.

    They had to cancel a concert at our local Odean cinema because hardly any tickets were sold.

      • The ‘Osmans’

        That would have been a funny look group. The Osman family. As in Richard Osman.

        Mind you hes just got married and she looks attractive.

        You never know.

  13. A very worthy cunting Geordy, eveytime this warbling cunt comes on the telly i think to myself if i was stuck in a lift with little Jimmy and Hitler and had a gun with 2 bullets in it, i would shoot Jimmy twice.
    Mrs Fugly is a fan of the little cunt singing the most fucking annoying song, infact didnt this godbothering little twat sing Puppy love and long haired lover from Liverpool, 2 just as annoying songs……Thats fucking it, get my gun and 2 bullets….

    • Ah i got Jimmy and Donny mixed up, also i forgot about Crazy horses, so my comment stands for either or both, better get a couple more bullets

  14. I wonder what pop music Angela Rayner was listening to when she had her legs open for the first time, and what music was playing on the police car radio when Anthony Blair got picked up for cottaging and importuning. History should record these events for posterity “the potency of cheap music” as Noel Coward had it.

      • ‘Morning Thomas – a pleasure to watch the cunt injure himself, but, as you say, not too seriously.

        “Let me put this lead splint on your leg and drop you off at the ED at the bottom of this canal”.

        You’re welcome.

      • A thousand apologies. I was watching a repeat of ‘Pointless Celebrities’ and the pair of Ubercunts were on there, coincidently with ‘Little’ Jimmy Osmand.

  16. Fucking freak with a microphone.

    I’d bet serious money that operation Yewtree are looking closely into his past…….

    Nuff Said.

  17. Good nom.

    I feel the same about Jimmy Somerville.

    Creepy, pasty features, high pitched ‘vocals’ and a degenerate.

    Cyclone B and the Oven please Unkle.

  19. This reminds me of what Joan Rivers used to say about Marie Osmond: “She’s so goody-goody, even Moses couldn’t part her legs.”

    • Brilliant Joan Rivers gag.
      ‘Long Haired Lover’ is one of the cuntiest records of all time. Cringe factor 10.

      Morning all.

  21. back in the early 70’s we used to get Mormons riding bikes around our council estate banging on doors and trying to lure us youngsters into their cult. You could spot them coming in their black suits and sunglasses, they looked like CIA characters out of the Xfiles

  22. It’s inarguable that the Osmonds were utter freaks, but their track “Crazy Horses” did kick butt.

    Well I liked it anyway…

  24. Another has-been fuck off cunty Cliff Richard wannabee cunt.

    Go away, sit in your armchair, pissing yourself with your hot chocolate and knitted blanket.

  26. People bang on about how great the music was in the 70s, maaaaan, but they are editing out of their minds endless naff acts like, The Osmonds that were ubiquitous as fuck for years and years and years.

    But they are what they are, The Osmonds. They aren’t promoting degenerate shite like the popstars of today, aren’t going “Deathcon 3 on the Jews.”
    What the cunt is that all about?

  28. Little Jimmy. Arguably the worst Christmas No.1 of all time. Certainly from the ‘good old days’ anyway. None of the modern ones count, because, since the mid 90s, they are all bad (Spice Girls, Band Aid remakes, X-Factor shit, that Ladbaby twat, Ed Sheercunt etc).

    But, in those days, the Christmas chart topper was a big deal, and people actually went out and bought the record. None of this ‘streaming’ Ginger Gargoyle Sheercunt and Titless Swift from a fucking iphone. Nearly a million people went out and actually bought the Slade ‘Merry Xmas Everybody’ single. The Christmas No.1 then was usually a mix of the traditional, the cheesy and occasionally the plain bizarre. Either seasonal ditties by Mud, Johnny Mathis or Slade. Sentimental novelty crap like ‘Long Haired Lover From Liverpool’ and ‘There’s No One Quite Like Grandma’. Or strange ones like ‘Another Brick In The Wall’. But it was all part of the whole festive thing, as was the Christmas Top of the Pops. In our house, we haven’t watched it as broadcast for several years, because it is now utter shit. Now, there are no real groups on it. Just a load of dance bollocks and rap dark personages, Little Mix slappers, and shite fat doughboys like Capaldi and Sheercunt. All presented by some loudmouthed millennial sambeau twat. Alex Scott will probably be doing it this year. We do, however, have copies of every Christmas TOTP from 1971 to 1985, and we do watch them at this time of year. Better than the crap that’s on now (except Little Jimmy, of course).😉

    • Succinctly put, Norm. Jonah Lewie – retired on the royalties of ‘Stop The Cavalry’ plus his other couple of hits. Didn’t even get to number 1, but, the amount it physically, as you say, sold, it’d be number 1 all year. Seen him on documentaries and he seems like a nice, down to earth bloke.

  29. And the BBC are complete hypocrites as usual.

    They won’t repeat any Christmas TOTPs presented by Savile (the usual ‘But… But… bollocks). Yet they will have the cunt all over the channel, played by that insufferable luvvie turd, Coogan. The difference being what? His victims will get reminded either way. What a bunch of fucks they are…

      • Good to see yer, Ron.👍

        The Daily Mail wetting themeslves. Saying Coogan looks ‘eerily like Jimmy Savile’. No, he doesn’t. He looks like Alan Partridge dressed as Old Mother Riley. He also – of course – looks like a cunt.

    • Yeah, the Savile drama, The Reckoning – first of all, there was no, ‘reckoning’ for Savile, was there? The series has been delayed until 2024…

      https://www.tvzoneuk.com/post/thereckoningdelay-rep/

      I thought this would happen. No one wanted to watch this and in the aftermath of the Queen’s death, it was a certainty the series would not air at Christmas time. But 2024? I wonder if we will EVER see it. If Warner Bros. can mothball the $95 million Batgirl piece of shit, make it a tax right-off, then the BBC might do the same. No one will demand to see a drama about child corpse rapist desecrator. Well, maybe me, my mum and Frankie Boyle, but not your average nice person! 😀

      • And that cunt Coogan is only doing it to get ‘serious acting’ cred and a BAFTA. He reckons that this story ‘needs to be told’. But, if that’s the case, why have the BBC swept it under the carpet since Savile snuffed it? Coogan doesn’t give a toss about Savile’s victims. Also, we all know what Savile did and got up to, and they won’t dare show any of the worst bits anyway. Like corpse fucking and the like. So, what is Coogan actually ‘telling’ us? Fuck all. What a cunt he is..

      • It will be scene after scene of Coogan going, “uh-uh-uh-uh-uhhhhh!” and, “now then, now then, now then!” chomping on a cigar in a pink tracksuit while he stomps around a hospital or BBC corridors. All set to the pop classics of the day, like, err… this…

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oi7ds7Lmmrk

        Eeeeeek. 🙁

      • Well… Paul Gadd illegally had sex with proper, proper KIDS in Thailand. And in 1975 he tried and failed thankfully to rape a 9-year-old, so he was a proper monster-level rapist not a Jimmy Page type creep. Now he’s in Portland Bill Prison or whatever it’s called. They have a public café there where the prisoners work, so if you are ever down there with the family…

  30. Fuck me … digging’ deep with this one. Luckily, I wasn’t around when they were doing’ their ‘thang’. Surely victims of child exploitation but bringing a different hue to the other shite mob of that era ‘The Jackson Five’. They were all on my list of ‘cancelled’ forgettable fuckwits … and I absolutely forgot about them … until ya’ll just mentioned it. ➕🔥

      • I think one of the other Osmonds had brain cancer a few years ago, the one who played all the instruments. Must have forgot to wear his magic Mormon underwear.

    • ‘Luckily, I wasn’t around when they were doing’ their ‘thang’.’

      Taken them behind the bike sheds, would you? Somewhere in Worcestershire?

      If they’d have turned up.

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