Depressing Songs

Posted on by

IsAC aficionados may possibly recall previous occasions when I’ve had a go at some ‘category’ of song which has pissed me off. I’ll have heard ‘Yesterday’ or ‘My Way’ on the radio, and gone off on one about ‘done to death’ songs. ‘Release Me’ will get me ranting about boring songs. ‘Honey’ or ‘Escape (the Pina fucking Colada Song)’ will start my motor running on the subject of nauseating or irritating songs.

Well today I added a new category to my ‘hate’ list collection; depressing songs. I was doing a bit of decorating in the kitchen, and an ‘oldies’ channel was belting them out; the Fabs, the Four Tops, Fleetwood Mac… great stuff. Then flaming arseholes, on came this right old pile of cunt; ‘in the year 6565 won’t need no husband won’t need no wife, pick your son and your daughter too, from the bottom of a long glass tube woe woe’.

Woe woe indeed. It was an effort called ‘In The Year 2525’ by a couple of cunts named Zager and Evans, which got to no.1 in 1969 I think. The wife, who was making coffee, did her Nan Taylor impersonation and opined “what a depressing load of old shit!”.

Indeed. Which begs the question, who forked out good money to listen to such a morbid sack of cack? Naturally this got us started on other miserablist tunes which have dampened our enthusiasm over the years. “Sinead O’Connor, ‘Nothing Compares 2 U’ ” said the wife. “Or what about Clapton’s ‘Tears In Heaven’, or ‘Famous Blue Raincoat’ by Leonard Cohen? In fact, just about anything by Leonard Cohen…”.

I quickly added ‘Alone Again (Naturally)’ from Gilbert O’Sullivan. Who could resist such inspiring lyrics as ‘I promise myself to treat myself and visit a nearby tower, and climbing to the top, will throw myself off…’. Or what about Michael Andrews’ heart-warming rendition of ‘Mad World’, you know, ‘the dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had’. Wasn’t that a Christmas no.1, along with that seasonally uplifting ditty ‘Another Brick In The Wall’ from Pink Floyd?

“Don’t forget The Verve’s ‘the drugs don’t work they just make you worse’ ” chimed in the missus again. “Oh, and ‘Mother Of Mine’ from that twat Neil Reid, and ‘I wasn’t there when my father passed away, I didn’t get to tell him all the things I had to say’. Mike and the bloody Mechanics”.

And on it went, listing all those songs which when played, can suck all the warmth and joy out of the sunniest summer day. I think we came up with enough choices to get us well on the way to a ‘Now That’s What I Call Depressing Music’ compilation.

So fellow cunters, if there’s a song which makes you want to lie in a warm bath and open a vein when you hear it, please feel free to add it to the collection. The more the merrier, and with a bit of luck, we could get it into the shops in time for Christmas…

Nominated by: Ron Knee

196 thoughts on “Depressing Songs”

  1. Wasn’t it Billy Connelly who said of country music that the songs are all like ‘Daddy was a cripple in Nashville’…

    • He also said of the aforementioned Sydney Devine that he was ‘the man who put the cunt in country music’.
      Superb!

      • Great nom as ever, Ron. Some depressing/sad songs are great. For example, I love ‘Reason to Believe’, ‘I’d Rather Go Blind’ and ‘Handbags and Gladrags’ all by Rod and the Faces.

        Modern sad songs are generally shit exceptions being the really mega depressing EMO stuff eg ‘The Black Parade’ by My Chemical Romance, which is fucking ace when played at almost deafening volume..

      • PS Eminem often writes about depressing shit, but in a sophisticated and upbeat kind of way. ‘Kill you’ is magnificent, IMO (as is ‘The Way I am’). The Marshall Mathers Album set him apart as the heir to Cole Porter when it comes to clever/slick lyrics.

  2. Peter Green wrote some pretty depressing songs but in a beautiful way.
    Man of the world for example 🎶👍

    • Saw him live a few times-a shadow of his former self.
      Brilliant guitarist-one if the true greats 👍

  3. Country music.
    Twangy guitars. Songs about blankets, divorce, dead dogs and depressed truck drivers….

  4. My extremely long playlist does not have depressing songs.

    When I was younger, I was a big Radiohead fan.

    Fuck me, I’m lucky to still be alive looking back. Great band, genius in fact, but depressing stuff.

    Ok Computer is still the best album I’ve ever heard, but I haven’t heard it for about 10 years and I don’t want to again.

  5. Every Pink Floyd album produced sits gathering dust on my CD shelf, because about 15 years ago I seriously had to pull my head out of my arse or end up bankrupt and homeless and I don’t want it sliding back up there.
    PS. Coldplay are cunts…

    • Roger Waters solo albums are wrist-slashingly downbeat too, but I still think Gilmour is the bigger cunt…

  6. When I split up with my first wife in ‘97, I spent far too long listening to the Tunnel of Love album by Bruce Springsteen. Which probably wasn’t good for my mental health.

    But it does have this gem which is one of the greatest love songs of all time. The way Springsteen and his future wife spend the whole video looking into each others’ eyes is fantastic…
    https://mikesplace2017.wordpress.com/2020/12/14/video-of-the-day-28/

  7. That fucking Adele is the queen of depressing dirges. Large girl meets boy. Large girl has one night stand with boy. Boy wipes his knob on he curtains and fucks off. Large girl thinks she is in love and has lost the love of her life.

    Large girl leaves her crusty curtains at the window as a shrine and then sings about the whole affair.

    “Hello, it’s me”

    Fuck off!

  8. Off topic but Kyle Rittenhouse has been cleared of all charges. Thank fuck.

  9. Holding back the years – Simply Red
    Angie – Rolling Stones
    Hello – Lionel Ritchie
    Absolutely anything by Adele or Coldplay

  10. Off topic but glad tidings, Cunters:

    Kyle Rittenhouse not guilty on all charges👍

    😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀

  11. Make no mistake-this is a massively important verdict.
    At last, the angry, protesting, left wing filth of Antifa & BLM, backed up and promoted by a corrupt MSM and Joe Biden himself, did not manage to p.ervert the course of justice.

    This could be the catalyst that gives hope to all right minded, free thinking individuals.

    😀😀😀👍

    (There’ a nom in the queue covering this news item. So please stay on topic – Day Admin)

  12. Armed with a semi automatic gun, he went to defend a friend’s auto franchise, like you do. Be the first thing that would spring to my mind, too.
    Riot! I’ll just grab my AK47 and go and defend my mate Neil’s garage.
    Would I fuck! I’d switch all the lights off and hide under the bed.

    • Defending his community for Antifa and BLM’s scum was a good thing. Even better, a few, including a kiddy fiddler ended up brown bread!

  14. Back on topic:
    Moat of the best songs are written by a artists that are having a shut time.

    “The Blues, ain’t nothin’ but a good man feelin’ bad!”

  15. Strange fruit has to be one of the saddest songs in the entire world, apart from that country classic
    ” I shot the dog, and I’m next”
    By Marvin Depressed As Fuck Twiter.
    or similar.

  16. For all their fanbsse may be a walking meme Linkin Park are a good example of depressing music done well.

    • Even got to the lead singer ‘in the. End’ , he off’d himself, can’t remember the name, Benny Chesterton or some such.

  18. ‘ Someone Saved My Life Tonight ‘ by Fat Reg.
    Tell me who it was Reg, and I’ll give the cunt a good twatting.
    Get To Fuck.

  19. What we’ve all missed is the National Anthem ‘ God save the Queen’
    Could anything be more dirge like or depressing than this?
    Billy Connelly did an excellent piss take about this.
    I’ll try to find it.

  20. 2 out of 3 ain’t bad by Mr M. Loaf – that’s dreary.

    A favourite of mine is the song ‘Easter’ by Marillion.

  22. I’m not a big fan of C&W music, but I’ve liked Johnny Cash discography, and less than a year before he died in 2003, aged 71, he wrote a really depressing song called “Hurt”

    It was essentially a celebration of his life, the ups and downs, the good times and bad. But when you look at him singing you realise he’s become a very old man, very close to death.

    The video is both depressing, but also incredibly powerful and emotive.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8AHCfZTRGiI&ab_channel=JohnnyCashVEVO

  23. Anything, pretty much by Depeche Mode. IMHO the greatest group ever.

    Martin L Gore. Depressing songwriting genius.

    • Doh!!!!
      How could we forget “Joy Division”!!!

      The great Ian Curtis-the daddy of depressing ditties!

      Come on Norman, where the fuck are you, on this?
      👍

  26. Does anyone else find Coldplay depressing?

    Dull as old dishwater. Dreary and dire.

    That “I will try and fix you” song of theirs is enough to have anyone reaching for the tablets.

    In fact, I hate their material and ideology full stop.

    • Not really. Dreary but not depressing. listening to Coldplay reminds me of the time me and my brother had to accompany my mum when she had a job cleaning council offices.

  29. I used to work with a cunt who would put Old Shep on a continuous loop on his computer, crank the volume up full and then lock his office door and bugger off for the rest of the day and leave it blasting out.
    Despite numerous warnings, he refused to stop as he thought it was hilarious and just harmless fun.
    We clearly didn’t share the same of humour as I found it hilarious and harmless fun when someone superglued his laptop to his desk and he didn’t.

  30. “Turn ’em on, turn ’em on
    Turn on those sad songs
    When all hope is gone
    Why don’t you tune in and turn them on”

    Fat Reg

    • Blue eyes by the same Reginald.

      What sick twisted psychopath would inflict that dirge on a relatively innocent population.

      Since Hitler died no one alive deserves that.

Comments are closed.