Eamon Holmes and his pigeon toes
A few nights ago I popped around to Mr Davies next door for a brandy and coke for a chat, he had the idiot lantern on and this advert came on, if you haven’t seen it it goes a bit like this;
R – come on you fat cunt let’s go for a walk
E – I’d love to me little rose of Tralee but being a fat cunt so I am, I must sit here as me legs are fucked from me obesity so they are!
R – why don’t you try my circulation boosting device, that should help?
E – okay my love I’ll have a go with it so I will to be sure!
A while later!
E – fuck me pink, dis ting is amazing so it is, I can now trot on me pigeon toes down to Burger King with no trouble so I can, jaysus I love being married to you me skinny harridan so you are!
It was refreshing to see a white couple on the box, but fucking hell, what a grade a cunt Eamon Holmes is, I thought I’d never have to see the west Brit cunt ever again!!!
Nominated by: Captain Quimson
He’s another cunt who will debase himself for money.
A magic foot spa?
Fuck off.
Any shithouse that sells equity release mortgages is a money grubbing whore.
An ultra Cunt.
Great nom Captain.
25
Hes a grabbing cuñt, hed sift through dogshite for a 10pence piece.
I suspect hes not even irish?
Put the accent on to make himself more interesting.
The boring fat slob.
17
His brother Barratt is a twat also.
23
MNC@ – And a plastic Manchester United “fan”.
What is it with these grasping fkers – they are already multi millionaires?
Oh yes – shameless greed and moral vacuity.
Although, in his defence – anyone who gets Langfords thunderous pair in their face when they look like an over inflated goblin is punching well above their weight, and anyone who hates Anthea Turner can’t be all bad! 😀
6
Imagine my disappointment when I saw Homes under the hammer on the telly programme listing and tuned in only to find this cunt wasn’t being bludgeoned to death with an Estwing.
10
An Estwing is far too nice a hammer for the job.
A Blackspur would suffice.
3
Marvellous piece from ‘Scenes we’d like to see’ on Mock the Week.
‘Today on Homes under the Hammer, we use this hammer on Eamonn Holmes.’
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Mock the weak!
12
The poor man’s Piers Morgan.
Hopefully him and Ruth ( and Piers Morgan) will meet a recently escaped Levi Bellfield next time they’re out for a stroll.
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Ruth’s feet, on the other hand, rubbing over your bellend with her toes, wanking you off…
Shit, have I typed that instead of thinking it??
Oh, the depravity.
17
Yeah would definitely fuck her.
6
I wouldn’t stir that cunts porridge.
3
Yeah, Ruth’s feet give me the ‘orn.
She’s always got nice sheer nylons on.
Nice set of pins for her age.
I think she would oblige DCI.
She would insist however, that that faux-Irish lump of lard should lick them clean afterwards.
10
Nice tits as well. She’d get a load on them too
9
I bet that cunts mopped up plenty of man mess during his time with her.
5
Great nom, CQ.
This cunt has dined out for years on being the poor man’s Terry Wogan. The genial Oirishman, who would sell his dead mum’s kidney on Ebay if it could make him some cash.
The only blood clot on that advert is Holmes himself.
The cunt.
12
Hahahaha brilliant PM. Yip Holmes the cunt is lower than a limbo dancer.
3
Great nom, CQ.
This cunt has dined out for years on being the poor man’s Terry Wo-gan. The genial Oirishman, who would sell his dead mum’s kidney on Ebay if it could make him some cash.
The only blood clot on that advert is Holmes himself.
The cunt.
Edited for naughty word that forms part of a dead Oirishman’s surname.
6
It’s rumoured that he sold her other kidney while she was still alive.
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RTC@ – Luckily for the lardy leprechaun he had sold her eyes prior to that so she couldn’t see him as he hacked out the kidney with a pocket knife!
3
He was pretty good in The Scarlet Claw.
4
He was pretty good in Ireland.
Should go back?!
That header pic above should carry a warning
‘not to be trusted around unattended creamcakes’
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Or in a schoolyard
4
Total utter scam artist.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=_jAuVsV6EmQ
How fucking low can you sink?
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Lower than a snake this cunt.
4
Fucking reptile. I bet that cunt hasn’t had to think about hawking his, no doubt, luxurious mansion to ensure he has enough cash to ensure he can afford some Whiskas pouches for his pet cat.
Cunt!
1
Never understood the appeal for him
Nauseous, boring slow witted and he thinks he is charming the audience the delusional dullard .
When I used to watch tv he was an a immediate switch the channel
6
Irish supports Man U sums him up
9
I fucking hate this ponsy prick. I’ve heard he’s also a nasty cunt to work with, proper diva.
He and his slag wife did a tellybox series once where they visited posh hotels and reviewed them, utter wankstain.
6
Hahahaha excellent. That’s what I remember most about that ad, Holmes and his fucked up feet. Wtf did she see in him, short arsed,pigeon tied, dumpty little Guiness gobbler?
4
Never heard of him. Phew.
2
Is this by chance the same scam device that cricketty cunt Botham used to advertise or have our trusted scientists invented more new technology in recent months?
2
He looks like an effeminate version of Bernard Manning who’s had too many botox injections.
3
Circulation booster?
Electric stool, with return electrode right up his arse. Switch on and boil.
1
Can’t stand this fat wanker, I bet he shits himself just to let his missus (slave) clean him up.! The cunt is to ugly for the Radio.!
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