Ignorant Motorists

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The absolute worst cunts on the roads around my locality is the “grochel motorist”, a species only seen between Easter and Autumn,

They seem to enjoy a sort of “supremacy” of back roads with their poor driving skills and ignorant attitude,

The other day I reversed for one of these cunts for nearly 600 yards to a passing place to save the cunts the attempt of reversing 2 car lengths on a country lane near me, and you know what the cunt couldn’t even acknowledge me, just looked straight ahead, and scooted past like a pearly king,

Now I don’t know whether these cunts get their licenses from Lucky dips at the local post office or they must bribe the examiner to pass them, if you can’t reverse, stick to the main roads where you can travel unimpeded and think your some kind of fucking “god”,

Really I just wanted to drag said cunt out of his fucking Range Rover and kick him in the bollocks to ensure he doesn’t breed another generation of entitled cunts!!!

Learn to drive properly you do späzmô cunts!!!!

Nominated by: Captain Quimson

31 thoughts on “Ignorant Motorists”

  1. I spend a lot of time on the roads or used to as most are just car parks nowadays.

    Driving a vehicle is at the limit of most people’s physical and cognitive abilities. Factor in other distractions they have like their phones/Facebook updates, kids screaming in the car, dogs, food at the wheel.. I’m amazed there at least 100 deaths a day.

    As for reversing, there are very few if any that can even attempt it and don’t get me started on the white van driving Ivan’s and dooshksa speeding around narrow lanes at 80mph plus in their left hand drive vehicles with no tax or insurance.

  2. “I reversed nearly 600 yards to a passing place.” ? Where do you live…..Peru? Katman-fucking-du?
    Be grateful you are not sharing the road with a couple of coachloads of immos on their way to a Peaceful funeral.

  3. Years ago I had an old couple in a Mini Metro expect me to reverse a combine to let them through. It was a narrowish road with trees that narrowed it even further at combine height…stupid old bastards had driven past a gateway where they could have pulled in but chose to sit looking at me from the middle of the road instead. I gestured at them to get off the fucking road,put my hand on the horn,switched all the night-time cutting spotlights but they were having none of it and just continued to stare at me… eventually I got sick and crept towards them with the reel going…that did the trick…old Fart shoved his chariot into reverse and shot backwards…straight into the ditch..still,at least I could then get past.

    I have also in the past blocked the main road into the village for over 20 minutes by refusing to reverse off the single lane bridge because a fella shot on from the other end when it was my priority…I sat nose to nose with him and got my flask and paper out when he wouldn’t back up.Eventually one of the timber-wagon drivers who were held-up told the fella that he might as well back up because he knew me and knew that I simply wouldn’t shift…as the fella reversed the length of the bridge I drove forward virtually touching his bonnet,revving my engine and making gesture at him….gave him a cheery wave as he pulled into the side,off the bridge,where he should have stopped in the first place.

    • Hehehe, 😀👍
      Some silly cunts out there.
      Use your loaf and have some manners.
      If in a Toyota Yaris dont expect a HGV to reverse round a corner for you!!
      Let him pass!!
      Few weeks ago, id dropped off my labourer and coming down a road of double parked cars,
      Halfway down, a school bus appears,
      Rather than wait 15seconds so ive passed he too starts up the road.
      Blocked.
      Someone has to reverse.
      He says hes not allowed because children on board.
      I say I can’t because of 6ft blind spot.
      So, we sat in a standoff for 10minutes while a load of kids made ‘wanker’ gestures at me.
      In the end the bus driver had to leave his vehicle and act as a banksman helping me reverse.
      No cunt won,
      Everyone was pissed off.
      I returned the wanker gesture to the kids.

      • I remember one night witnessing this. Neither would back down. The night falling. Cars backed up. Then negotiations from the drivers backed up. I think what happened in the end they both reversed so nobody won.
        Strange feeling the cars nose to nose…in the late evening…
        Could make a short story out of it I thought.

      • ‘Your labourer’ ?

        How common. Most of us on here have staff to drop labourers off.

    • I also once had the local Police come and tell me that I had to pay for the damage after I jumped out of my vehicle and kicked the front wing of a car when the driver wouldn’t get out..he tooted his horn at me when I was having bother with the clutch at some traffic lights…local Plod told me better to pay for the wing than get taken to Court

  4. Great nom. All I expect is a simple gesture of thanks. For some it’s beyond them. I can normally tell if a thanks is coming and I’m ready with hand or finger gestures of my own if I feel disrespected. In some cases I move forward so they have to hear my rage. This is often “you cunt”, “you fat cunt”, “you Pàki cunt”, “you ugly bitch” you fat bitch”, “you’re a wanker”. I’ve even got out a few times. Had a dooshka get out once and told me he lived here, I said “I don’t give a fuck, I was born here so fuck off”. I’ve thrown various items as they pass without a thanks. Bananas, half eaten roll, apple cores, even a full cup of hot tea, all gone towards the windscreens of these ‘I’m better than you’ cunts. For me and the miles I do this is an every day occurrence and really, really pisses me off. I just can’t let it go, ever. It’s so easy to just lift your fingers from the steering wheel and go ‘thanks mate’ but as with so many things today it’s beyond them. Cunts.

    • My chief irritation is Cunts that don’t use indicators…particularly on roundabouts….the same as you say about lifting your finger to say thanks,how fucking hard is it to push an indicator lever and give people some fucking clue about what they intend to do ?

      Morning,Rob
      Morning,All.

      • Remember years ago when the indicator stalks were first moved over to the wrong side of the column? (EU law I presume.) I followed a car where the indicators were being used in the wrong direction consistently. Said car turned out to have the same destination as me and after parking up I approached the lady driver in all innocence and said to her that it seemed the indicators on her shiny new car had been wired wrongly. Turned out she had learned and still had fixed in her mind that you moved the stalk up to turn left and down to turn right.

  5. It’s the height of the tourist season here in the Lak District, and needless to say the country lanes and villages have turned into temporary carparks by the SUV and caravan set!

    Big fuck off 4x4s parked any-which-way, blocking driveways, laybys, and of course single-lane roads, forcing oncoming traffic to drive on the pavements and almost knocking over pedestrians (some of which are probably the same tourist cunts who parked their 4x4s!)

    You can hear people tooting their car horns, shouting and calling other motorists selfish thoughtless cunts! No one wants to back down or reverse, or do anything that would mean getting off one’s high horse.

    As a consequence delivery vans can’t deliver food to local shops; the emergency services can’t do their job, and basically the entire road network becomes one big logjam of cunts not being able to go anywhere due to the thoughtless few!

  6. I have a car gathering dust, try to walk whenever I can. Keeps the BP down and my joints working. Added to that there’s a school nearby and if you move your car that’s it for the day.
    I do watch the arguments amongst parents and fellow neighbours about driveway blocking and reversing.Its a fact that many women can’t reverse which maybe explained by men telling them 8 inches is in fact 3 or 4.
    Not me of course.
    I’m in the lakes next week to add to the chaos but after reading this, Mrs Infidel will be at the wheel. Sounds like Mad Max out there.

  7. No need to worry, the great green revolution will sort everything out, the electrification of cars, vans, trucks will ensure the number on the roads will be halved by 2050.
    Roads littered with stranded flat battery cars, mobile charging units flying around to get people going.

    In the meantime, keep calm and carry on.

  8. Great nom. The latest motoring related ‘habit’ that gets my blood pressure up is cunts that stop dead in front of us or pull over to the fucking RIGHT when we’re on blues and sirens. The RIGHT!! On a CAT 1 blue-light run, the other day, I had a dozy bitch, cruising in Lane 2 on an empty dual carriageway actually stop in Lane 2 rather than pull over into the EMPTY Lane 1. I just slammed on the brakes, stopped and kept the bullhorn going and my crewmate gesticulated for her to pull over, for fucks sake. We did stop and wind down the window to give her some constructive feedback on her filthy driving habits. No complaint, yet😁 And pulling over to the right? What the FUCK is that all about??? And the ‘Are you going to be long’? crowd wind me up, too. It’s a fucking ambulance, mate, blue lights flashing, it’s a fucking emergency and someone’s having a worse fucking day than you. I did shout at one dozy cunt:

    “Depends how long we take to get the patient’s heart started and him breathing again”.

    Complained and I got a rap on tje knuckles. We usually radio for the police, and, they’re very sypathetic to us and fuck the motorists off at high port.

    • On a busy dual carriageway I saw and heard an ambulance approaching fast from behind.One car moved over to the left, all the others moved over to the right and more remarkably the ambulance driver appeared to have expected the cars to move right. I was the driver of the car which moved left so I wasted no time getting out of the way. Can’t explain it to this day, although this was in London.

      • We anticipate people being cunts, most of the time. You, however, were correct in your manouevre.

  9. Lord F: I had exactly the same experience on a narrow bridge as you. Exactly.
    Fucking uncanny.
    This was an old cunt on the biggest Mercedes I have ever seen.
    I was halfway across the bridge and it was my right of way. Helping a mate move in with his bird, in a large self hire van.
    The cunt lurched onto the bridge, slammed on, then did that gesture, flicking the back of his hand at me to reverse.

    I shook my head. A ten minute stand-off ensued, only broken when my mate poured us both a cup of tea from his flask and I opened the paper, then, with little finger extended, started to drink my tea, with exaggerated daintiness.

    He capitulated and reversed back from the entrance-probably a retired judge or company director who had got his own way for 70 years.

    As we passed, I waved like her majesty at him.

    The funniest thing, his wife, (skeleton thin, sour faced, severe cheekbones, polo neck with pearls), has sat completely motionless, staring forward, no talking, for ten minutes, looked like she was verbal long the cunt up completely, for letting the oiks win😂

  10. Become the Toad of the Road and buy a Range Rover. Give your neighbours a reason to hate you.

  11. Most cunts drive a car that’s too fucking big for them. SUVs, pickups, those dreadful VW T5s or whatever, and none of them passed a test in a car bigger than a mini. They have no idea how wide their motor is, and depending on the type of cunt driving, they will either bully oncoming traffic into pulling in, as they use the whole of the road to get through any congestion, or stop and wait like a tit, even though you could get a bus through the gap easily.
    A lot of said bellends live in terraced housing, and think nothing of what the size of their vehicle impacts on the available parking spaces, or if they have a chavvy van for the weekend and something boxy for commuting, it’s fuck the neighbours, I’ll park outside their house.
    People are cunts.

    • Re terraced housing, that’s two fuckoff gigantic bloated looking cars per terraced house round my way. One fucking great people carrier for wifie to carry the single infant 200 yards to school twice a day, one obese BMW for Daddy’s commute to somewhere else where there is no parking either.

      • My street in on average three per house, his and hers cars, and a works van or a hobby mobile. As kids are to lazy and don’t like spending money on anything other than entertainment, they don’t leave home til at least late 20s early 30s, so their cars get added to the mix.
        Some cunt bought the house opposite and turned into a rental, now there’s three jobless cunts in there with a car each, all newer than mine.
        All cunts.

      • And Gutstick they are all peacefully being sponsored by the likes of us?

  12. I used to live in a short cul de sac. One day I drove into it to find a car coming the other way. He stopped behind our neighbour’s car and waited for me to pass. I pointed to the driveway that he was stopped in front of showing I wanted to go there. He just sat there and wouldn’t move. I turned the engine off, got out, locked the car and went into the house. He was still there 20 minutes later when he relented and reversed so I could get onto my drive.

  13. Driving through the East End one afternoon at school finishing time, surrounded by cars driven by peacefuls in burkas collecting the offspring. The lack of parking and reversing skills beggared belief. If half of them had passed a driving test I would eat my undercrackers.

  14. Its the fuck knucles who indicate one way and then go the other, these cunts should be dragged from their cars and fucked with a wire brush until the can quote the highway code like a Jahova witness can quote the fucking bible…..cunts

  15. Used to live in an upstairs flat in an un-named city in E of England. As in many cities, on-street parking was at a premium.
    Next door neighbours had an entire house, and ALSO their own driveway. But would they fucking park their fucking car on their fucking driveway? Nah, no fucking chance. The wife seemed to think that she was the owner of a space outside our flat. We told her to use her bloody drive, but she was not having any of it. Her husband said nothing, just stood there looking embarrassed.
    She was a snotty bint, always going on about how she’d got married in a cathedral. PhD in geology, all the sexual allure and intelligence of a lump of rock.

    • I apologise on behalf of all decent geologists everywhere. And can confirm that the matrix from which a core has been drilled can be vastly more exciting than some of the females on offer in Earth Sciences – though perhaps not a poorly consolidated conglomerate.

  16. Very appropriate picture that was chosen for this cunting. This breed of vehicle-born cunt always seem to drive either modern Land Rovers, Range Rovers or more specifically AND typically………. Range Rover Evoques. Arrogant, stuck up, nuevo-riche pricks.

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