Victoria’s Secret (2)


Victoria’s Secret – taking the fun out of life.

An example of how to lose your place in the market by kowtowing to the woke.

Have you ever wondered how to rekindle the passion in your relationship? A romantic meal for 2 in a fancy, expensive restaurant perhaps or a weekend away at the hotel where you spent your honeymoon? How about some raunchy underwear to set the pulses racing in the bedroom?

If it’s the latter then never fear, boys and girls, because Victoria’s Secret may soon have the latest solution and become the primary source of inspiration of gifts for the hard to please love of your life.

Yes, in the name of all that is PC they’ve brought on board Megan Rapinoe, the US bean flicking footballer extraordinaire (in her mind at least) who is guaranteed to give brewers droop to even the most desperate of dirty old men; Valentina Sampaio, a Brazilian tr ân nīė*, model and actress (supposedly); and former Miss World 2000, Priyanka Chopra Jonas, who has clearly changed her tune from her Miss World swimsuit days despite it having helped enormously with her current career in Bollywood.

Therefore, expect no more titilating, sexy see through, peephole, crotchless stuff. Expect instead to see a new range with adverts proclaiming something along the lines of:-

“Out soon, a Victoria’s Secret special available online only. It’s just what your non-gender specific acquaintance always wanted for the fossil fuel free December 25th Winterval. Yes it’s a rainbow motifed boilersuit printed with quotes by St George of Floyd and heavily perfumed with the ‘before & after’ scent of a vegan Vindaloo curry. Lined with the finest halal approved “Mekka” brand faux goat hair from Arabia it comes with a detachable and biodegradeable imitation black Rhino horn strap-on designed and personally tested by Sandi Toksvig.
Complete with a 12 months supply of palm oil free lubricant designed to sooth both dry f@nny itch and prolapsed bottoms. Made in Luton, UK by (mostly) TB free, undocumented migrants in eco- powered yurts from ethically sourced and sustainable soya beans”.
Modelled by the fat, shameless twerker Lizzo & O Jones.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-57508848

* The WikiP page for Sampaio currently makes mildly amusing reading as some wit seems to have slipped in an interesting and as yet unnoticed description of him/it as follows:-
“Valentina Sampaio
Born: 10 December 1996 (age 24) Aquiraz, Ceará, Brazil
Nationality: Brazilian
Occupation: Model, actress
Years active: 2016–present
Modeling information: Height 1.77 m (5 ft 9+1⁄2 in)
Hair color: Brown
Eye color: Green
Valentina Sampaio (born 10 December 1996) is a p ê r v ê r t ë d MALE Brazilian model and actor who thinks he is a female. He became Victoria’s Secret’s first openly “t ran sg end er” p ë r v ê r t model in August 2019, and became the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue’s first openly t ran sg end er model in 2020”.

Won’t be long before it gets spotted and changed.

PS. Apologies for the gaps and spelling of certain words in the attempt to bypass the usual WordPress moderation.

Nominated by: Dickie Dribbler

Then added to by: Dickie Dribbler

Bug ger! That didn’t take long. While I was laboriously typing away, the WikiP page for Sampaio was updated at 20:43 (UTC) on 17/06/21 to remove the P ver t references. Some people just have no sense of humour.

62 thoughts on “Victoria’s Secret (2)

  1. Hilarious nomination-and bound to effect our priapic Cunters like brewers droop😂

    Well cunted👏

  2. Good shot.
    The invasion of The Joyless Freaks continues.
    I hope the whole enterprise collapses and the “models” end up on crack giving 2 quid blowjobs to tramps.

  3. Some secrets are best kept that way – difficult if the “laydees” can be seen from space..

  4. Wasn’t this Arapaho bitch in the shit for some tweet from 10 years ago or something? Something about some Hawaiian bitch she was dildoing looking like an Asian or something? Anyway I know it was nothing and the lezza was keeping schtum about it. Funny how, if you are a fake lefty cunt like Harry Halfwit or that Trudeau cocksucker you can get away with murder but any normal bod gets hung, drawn and quartered.
    So Victoria’s Secret are going woke, lezza and butch are they? Well good luck with that little venture. I’m all for it myself. The more bummers and lezzas there are the more normal birds left for me. That’s the theory anyway.

    • FtF@ – Megan Rapinoe got a free pass for what she put – the England cricketer got crucified for putting less.

  5. I couldn’t really believe how ‘Victoria’s Secret’ hadn’t been challenged before. Just one of the anomalies sometimes when someone or something is given a ‘pass’. I mean its 40 years ago that poor Bob Hope was heckled st Miss World.

    And from the feminist perspective surely VS was/is even worse than Miss World with their feather boas and wings.

    A bit like Hugh Hefner became the champion if women’s sexual freedom dressing them in bunny outfits.

    Well they’ve jumped before they were caught. But the Rapinoe ‘woman’. of all people.

    I remember watching the ‘heats’ in the seventies at the seaside towns for Miss UK. All stood there in the freezing cold.. Seemed very innocent then.

  6. “you got owt in rubber luv?
    Victoria s secret, full of nice little sexy knickers and giggling young birds.
    Marvelous.
    But using pablo Escobars hippo as a model is a own goal.
    Young birds want to look like hot young models an be sexy,
    Not like some fat bloke who looks like Rusty Lee.
    The knickers all stretched out of shape with skidmarks in.
    Thats not sexy.

    Ps all Brazilians are deviant’s
    Why you get the term Brazil nuts and the nickname for a shaved fanny.

  7. Fuck me, look at that bird in the photo! Look at the thighs and jugs on it! Right up my fucking alley. She’d definitely get a massive pearl necklace from yours truly.
    No raaaaaaaay-shul prejudice in Freddie’s lily pond. No sir!

    • Its a bloke Freddy.
      You put your hand down there?
      Like Woolworths pick n mix.
      A handful of chocolate Brazil nuts.

      • Why is every cunt trying to spoil it for me? I’m traumatised and you’ve made me cry. How come there’s never a safe space when you need one?

        Fascist!

      • “Therefore, expect no more titillating, sexy see through, peephole, crotchless stuff”.
        Well that’s fked up my outfit for tonight then 😢👠

  8. Who the fuck would want to see some Bernard Manning tribute act in “smalls”?…they should realise that flimsy undies make for poor camouflage when you’re trying to convince people that you’re not actually just a Pig in a pair of knickers.

      • Hogs in Hosiery.
        Boars in Bras
        Sows in Silkies.
        Tamworths in Titty-trays
        Saddlebacks in Skidded Scuddies

      • Parrots in pyjamas
        Percy in panties.
        FFS! You just can’t imagine how fuckin’ hard it is shopping for a transvestite parrot.

  9. Hey, zoom in on the header pic,
    Look at the tattoo on the thigh!
    ‘323’
    Wonder what that is?
    The bus back to the favelas?
    Favourite at the chinkys?
    Dress size?

    • 323 is what the Yanks call an “Angel Number”. It’s a load of wokery pokery New Age bullshit about spirituality and all that bollocks. It’s just some arsefuckery some cunt has made up to screw money out of idiots.

      • Not sure what’s grimmer, the pic or having to go on that bus. I’d choose to ride neither.

    • MNC@ – I believe that is the emergency helpline for if “she” rolls onto some kid or falls over..

      • Speed dial for save the whale eh?
        Repulsive isnt she Foxy?
        My winky withdrew into my tummy like a tortoise in its shell when I looked at it.

      • No, MNC, 323 is not “the bus [sic] back to the favelas”; such transport as there is to those Brazilian slums do not have numbers. They are akin to the Dolmuș “services” to gecekondu bölgesi in Turkey. I thought you may be familiar with the latter from friends’ descriptions of their holidays in Bodrum, Marmaris, Ölüdeniz or suchlike. I know you personally never wish to visit such chavtastic public conveniences.

        It isn’t her “target weight” either, Mickey Blue Eyes – at least certainly not in pounds avoirdupois. Although the 323 might be convenient for Morrisons in Cheadle Heath, the “chick” is clearly not from round there. You’re just being deliberately obtuse there, Vesper Lentil. It’s self-evidently not an ear tag, Dick; you’re being silly.

        Freddie the Frog is closer to the truth with his “Angel Number” conjecture. In fact, “323” is a simple Caesar cypher¹ of “212”. Vernon Fox came closest of all with his emergency helpline hypothesis. +212 is, of course, well-known as the telephone dialling code for New York.

        Within various perhaps distasteful sub-cultures and by extension, “212” finds wide usage in various American cants and argots relating to a specific stratum of ne’er-do-wells from or connected with NYC.

        Azealia Banks released an eponymous catchy hit tune some years ago in this context.

        Look who’s back. Never change – DA

      • ¹ I was going to explain this, but decided to let Wikipedia do the heavy lifting and failed to remove the superscript.

        For additional clarity (and not for the first time) a link to Ms Banks’ 2012 début “hit single”. Perhaps ancillary numeromancy was in play in connexion with the year of release, on reflection.

      • Bloody snob. The dolmuș is the answer to our expensive and unreliable public transport system, if you only think about it. Economical, environmentally friendly and efficient, filling in the gaps between bus and train routes, doesn’t leave the pickup point (usually a bus station – we might have to build some) until it’s full of passengers, stops wherever you want it to, like a taxi, and on longer hauls will do refreshment stops. I particularly recommend the scenic run over a corner of the Taurus from Alanya to Fethiye…you won’t be bothered by tourists on the longer trips.

        A good illustration of the upside of Austrian economics as advocated by von Mises, incidentally.

        Apologies. Erudite pomposity is catching. Beware.

  10. They are clearly seeking to appeal to a niche market, whilst abandoning their core clientele. Not a good business move at all. Go woke, go broke.

    At least Ann Summers hasn’t gone the same way; if they have any sense they will quickly fill VS’ vacated seat and bring us some impossibly cute models with ample breasts.

  11. Fuck VS.

    If they want to explore/exploit new markets, then good luck to them. But just in the same manner wokes can cancel things/people they don’t like (and doing it extremely vocally over social media), then the silent majority of ordinary folk can simply do the same by boycotting the likes of VS, and see how they fair then!

    The wokey inclusion/diversity bandwagon is currently in full swing, but like with most trendy new things it will have a pretty short lifecycle, and in perhaps a couple of years time no one will give a shit and the likes of VS will no doubt revert back to its original formula in an attempt to win those very same silent majority of former customers back again.

    Yeah, good luck with that!

  12. Good nom this mr Dribbler👍
    For playing woke I hope VS lose massively.
    Once sales fall through the floor they’ll reconsider their stance,
    And Valentine hungryhippo will get its p45.
    Know your target customer.
    A Normal lass wants to be like a pin up for her self esteem
    Its like influencing blokes to buy undercrackers by having Stevie Hawkins modelling them!
    I buy my missus good strong bloomers from Outdoor Supplies UK.
    Strong and sensible!
    And I can use the elastic for my catapult.

    • MNC@ – Careful now Sir – I once spent money on a gal and she then expected the same every birthday – and furthermore, made some very specific and strongly worded complaints when she realised I had forgotten to take the “in loving memory” card out of the flowers! (In my defence I had no time to check as I was escaping an angry mob of mourners)..
      I wonder if Victorias next secret is to report a 50% reduction in annual profits?

      • Im more ‘Victorian Secret” Foxy.
        I wear Jack the Ripper undercrackers, makes my upper lip stiff,
        and put the missus in Bedlam lunatic asylum.
        We don’t talk about it though.

  13. Tits and ass, but just like a stick of rock the word MALE runs all the way through, there’s no such thing as trans, just an ellusion for the hormone imbalanced mentally ill.

    When it can naturally give birth with all the right bits, then a FEMALE it will be, till then a cut and shut.

  14. Its the way things are going to go nowadays, pretty girls will be a thing of the past, girls like Michelle Allison or Michelle Jenekke [check em out and you will see] women who can be athletes and sexy are all going to be replaced by gorillas like Penis Williams and the likes of the above trogg, and all this is to pander to the minority groups, woke, womens rights, trannies,animal rights,steriod abuse, ugly people all around the world all of which will be able to say, -look at that woman of colour, that obvoiusly works out or injects testosterone, how she can hit a tennis ball through a wall and yet finds being a mum really difficult, the realality is look at this cave man looking bitch who without tennis would be to ugly to be on tv moaning about being a woman of colour and a mum and woke bollocks.
    Bring back the pretty girls that are more famous for their looks than tennis and other sports like Anna Kournakova that blonde golf player and loads of others[see Michelles above], you know the kind of girls you can watch grilling a bacon sandwich or washing your car and make things like tennis, golf, athletics watchable girls that bring pleasure to life instead of the captain caveman types we are seeing more of now……

  15. Hahahaha I love this type of thing. I guarantees the imminent demise of any company that goes down this woke road. Within three years they’ve gone from sensible with sexy models to fucking insane with creatures out of a Hammer Horror film. Any company ignoring this woke pish is certain to benefit. I bet Ann Summers doesn’t do this.
    And wtf is the thing in the man suit with the short purple hair meant to be and who identifies with it? A minority of freaky wackos. Hahahaha brilliant.

  16. Look who’s back. Never change – DA

    Almost right. “I never change” for sure, rather like RTC, MNC, Dick, Unkle, Cunstable Pithy, Gutbucket, Miles, Sir Limply (is he on holiday?), divers Captains, DCI, Paul Trout Mask …. I almost forgot TBRILW/ROFL Coconuts there. Has he been detained under §28 yet?

    In fact (almost) every single regular here clings to the ruggèd cross of his/her “carefully crafted persona”, as I recall mentioning quite a while ago. Although this is to be expected, is as it should be and is undeniably accurate, it didn’t go down to well.

    Not quite, though, Admin. I’m not “back” but have been having a few days off. I don’t think I’ve looked on here in weeks (until yesterday).

    Best wishes

    It wasn’t a criticism. – DA

    • Feel free to continue, sometime I read right through and sometime I haven’t the energy to follow what may or may not be a train of thought, just put in something funny for us sad cunts

      • Personally I am grateful for his style over substance posts, as you can scroll past the boring drivel he culls from Wikipedia in a desperate attempt to appear intelligent.

    • You didn’t almost forget me, caught boring. I was first on your mind and we both know it, you just don’t like to admit it because I’m so far in your head you’ve taken to asking my permission out loud if you can leave the room 😉

      Mothers clothes in the dry cleaners so day off from pretending to be your girlfriend?

      LOL

      😂

  17. All these brands that used to peddle their shite to the super sexy have probably realised with COVID and people lazing around at home people have become super fatty, so new markets have opened up.

    Is their enough fabric to go round?

  18. How to kill a brand in a season.
    Victoria’s secret will disappear, as gladrags on a tubby or a freak is rolling shit in glitter.

  19. Each to their own – but promoting wrong as right – ain’t right.
    A secret best kept.

  20. The whole VS Corporate office that makes these decisions is made up of the worst phaggits and wokies that have completely lost all perspective on what is truly sexy and beautiful.
    It’s sad that the days of women like Adriana Lima, Marisa Miller, and Miranda Kerr are long gone.

  21. This shit has been tried before!

    The Dove soap real women adverts. A lineup of Dump truck sized women getting away from the previous adverts that Dove was just showing beautiful women! Like always it backfired like fuck because believe it or not their feedback showed that even other women don’t want to see a load of fat arsed Heifers in an advert, even if they are supposed to represent “real women”.

    Advertising 101: Show them what they can be, not who they are!

    Good moaning and fuck off!

      • Mm, yes, that’s what you’ve got to do to these lesbian and mincer chappies… stick ’em with the old pigsticking lance. Jolly good idea. When I was out in Injah…

  22. Anyone remember the old ads that featured quality models for women to aspire too, now any old freak or fatty will do.

    • I’ve heard the photo is a still from the new bond movie, that’s why Daniel craig is fucking off.

  23. Hope the cunts wound is everything he dreamed of and the bullshitter surgeon Dr Slice told him it would be. I doubt it though as they don’t speak out about their surgical outcomes as they want as many other cunts duped into the same fate.

  24. 60 odd replies and none mention the founder/owner of Victoria’s Secret Leslie Wexner. Bankroller of Jeffrey Epstein (jailed/dead), international trafficking of underage Ukrainian ‘models’ whom he sourced through Jean Luc Brunel (in jail awaiting…) and Peter Nygard (in jail awaiting…) long term associate of Ghislaine Maxwell (jailed awaiting a subcontract mafia hit) and her evil fat zionist cunt of a father Robert Maxwell (offed by Mossad, funeral attended by 6 ex-heads and the serving head of Mossad!) Gifted Epstein the New York rape mansion, financed his brother Mark’s properties which served as the ‘warehouse’ for these girls. Gave Epstein power of attorrney over his business interests !!??wtf! Long time associate of Mayer fucking Lanski fer fuck’s sake, and the Bronfmann crime syndicate. Founding member of the MegaDonors with Bronfmann (daughter Claire jailed for her involvement in the NXIUM peed0h procurement ring) and Michael Steinhart later to admit a certain Steven Spielberg to its ranks of corrupted shitbags.

    Wexner has been divesting himself of all his VS and L brands connections as fast as he fucking can over the past year and will disappear into Israel unoless Maxwell decides to plea bargain upwards in which case the cunt’s a dead man walking.

    Wexner = synonym for CUNT

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