Late cunts

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Fucking hell I’m so fed up of late cunts, not just coz they’re lazy, ignorant twats, but coz they give us decent tradesmen a bad name.

I live in a rented house (though I’ve just bought a place with my girlfriend, yet to move in), and there was a leak. I could’ve sorted it myself but as it’s not my place I’m not gonna fuck about with the plumbing.
The geezer was due at 10.30.
The cunt turned up at 2.
Didn’t answer my calls. Wasted my day. Turned up, but forgot his tools… so a job that could’ve started at 10.30 and finished at 10.45, started at 1400 and finished at 1530.
Cunt.

When I was self employed (sparks) I considered being 10 minutes late as LATE.
Now I’m employed, they consider 5 minutes late as moan moan fucking moan…
….fair enough in my book….

How do these ignorant cunts get, and hold onto customers?
How can anyone think it is acceptable to fuck people about like that?

My sis ordered a plumber a year ago. Didn’t turn up. Ordered another. Didn’t turn up.
My dad did the job.
2 days later one of them turned up to do the job…. what a lazy useless cunt. 2 fucking days late. I bet the cunt somehow still gets customers though coz, well, that’s just how tradesmen are….

NO WE ARE FUCKING NOT.

It gives us all a bad name and I really can’t understand how hard it can be when someone says:
“what time are you coming?”
To say:
“Ten thirty”
And then to turn up at ten thirty. Or by 11. Or within 3 fucking hours of the time you said. Or to call the client and tell them you’re running late

.
Or just to answer your fucking phone in the first place….

Useless cunts.

Nominated by: Deploy the Sausage 

42 thoughts on “Late cunts”

  1. Quite agree.

    Fair enough if someone has a legitimate excuse and lets you know but it is just arrogant and ill-mannered to just leave you hanging…do they think that you are so unimportant that they can treat you that way?…I know that over the years I’ve sent various people packing, after explaining my thoughts on punctuality and manners, when they did eventually deign to honour me with their presence.

    I always try to be places early…I’d prefer to sit and wait until the appointed time rather than be late and treat people so disrespectfully.

    • PS…most of these “I’m late…you can just sit and wait” Cunts tend to have the same lackadaisical attitude towards their work..it’s a good tip-off that they will probably do a poor job. If it is something urgent where I can’t just tell them to turn around and Fuck Off back to where they came from, I let them do the job and then tell them that I’ll be treating their bill with the same cavalier attitude as they treated me.

    • ….and more….when I used to do the bigger jobs I had a minibus that I used to pick up the crew…if anyone wasn’t ready, I wouldn’t wait. My thinking was that if one person kept six people waiting for ten minutes that was a full man-hour wasted just because some Cunt couldn’t crawl out of his bed on time.

      • Agree with all that, Mr Foxchaser-Fiddler as I fucking hate late cunts. However, there is an exception, I believe. Perhaps you can confirm? Mrs Twenty tells me that when it comes to social events, arriving up to ten minutes after the appointed time is considered ‘fashionably late’. I can see how arriving ten minutes early might be considered a bit previous, but better than being late (even then, I think it is better to lurk outside for at least eight of those ten minutes), but ten minutes late seems more likely to be fucking annoying to one’s hosts.

        Of course, I can quite understand royalty turning up late. The late King George the Fifth, for example.

      • I’m so rarely invited anywhere (and NEVER twice) that I really have no idea I’m afraid.

        Morning,Twenty.
        Morning,All.

    • I am the same . I always make sure I’m early for an appointment. Even meeting someone for coffee. It’s got something to do with our calvanistic, Presbyterian upbringing together with a dollop of Anglo Saxon decency.

  2. It’s very rude to be late but try telling that to the wankers who run the trains in this country and then watch them laugh in your face.
    You must have noticed that women are always, and deliberately, late. They seem to think it’s part of their sexual allure. In my world if you ain’t got big tits and arse you better turn up on time or you can fuck right off.

    • General faff time or faffage as I call it. Always tell a wimminz you need to be somewhere half an hour before you actually do, this way you might actually only be ‘quite late’.

  3. I work in IT, and self-employed. And I loathe being late for client-site visits (especially pre-covid)

    I always make pre-plans using Google Maps to work out how long the journey will take, often giving myself plenty of time, even if it means arriving an hour early than the appointed time.

    And if I am going to be late I will always phone (never text as that doesn’t sound too polite for certain clients) to tell them I will be delayed due to whatever.

    I was always brought up to appreciate being punctual, polite and letting people know where you are. But those simple standards – like most old fashioned ideals – seem to have been flushed down the bog in favour of some trendy woke bollocks!

    • Quite right techno, you will always respect a man by knowing that you can rely on him to be where he says he will be and precisely when he’ll be there.

    • Quite agree Techno, social norms like manners, punctuality and general respect have been on the decline for years. Just look at the state of modern parenting, education and militant snowflakes in the workplace.

  4. Absolutely agree. Delivery cunts the worst. The number of days I’ve taken off over the years to wait in for an important delivery, only for the cunts not to turn up or even answer their fucking phones is ridiculous.

    I’m with DF on this about shoddy tradesmen. My attitude has changed. If some cunt turns up 5 hours late to do a job after ignoring my calls/emails etc (and doesn’t have a fucking great reason like he was knocked out after an accident)…I tell them to fuck off and because I’ve now got someone more reliable to do the job later. And that yes, I could’ve called them and (if they answered!) let them know not to waste their time driving 10 miles, but you wasted my time you cunt, so fuck you. Enjoy the drive home without any of my money you cunt.

    • With you on this one. In the 90’s I was looking to upgrade my consumer unit and rang 6 electricians to get quotes. They all made appointments but only one of the cunts turned up. He was 2 weeks late (2 fucking weeks!!!) and expected me to be grateful he turned up at all. I told him to fuck off and never did get the unit upgraded.

  5. When I worked in teaching there was a twice weekly staff briefing at 8.40. The senior staff would troop in anything up to seven minutes late. I considered it to be their way of saying ‘we’re more important than you lot’. After this happened a couple of times I decided to allow two minutes grace and then leave. Fairly soon many of the 80 staff adopted my tactic and it was noticeable that the senior staff started to arrive on time.
    Mind you, I still regarded them as a bunch of cunts.

    • Im never late.
      NEVER.
      It was drummed into me by my dad.
      Im working today,
      I’ll have time to defrost the van,
      Nip the garage an pump up the tyres,
      Go pick up my helper.
      And still be 10min early.
      The only thing im late for is my period.

    • Remember a senior leadership team from lots of years ago they were nicknamed Jizz, bumble, bean, peado and cunt. Fairly accurate descriptions as it later turned out.. Useless cunts still meant that the rest of us could do as we pleased.

      (Your use of the word “peado” went into the MQ as it triggers WordFence. Best improvise next time round – DA)

  7. All part of the general lack of courtesy and good manners that is prevalent today.
    I blame the sixties / hippies for it.
    Fucking degenerates.
    Speaking of degenerates, Tony Blair was on the telly earlier.
    Looks rough.
    I think the contract with Satan may be nearing termination.
    You read it here first.
    Go Satan.
    Good morning.

    (Seems someone is running an uptick script again. ho hum – DA)

  8. I can only echo Deploy’s experience with some of those in the building trade.

    When I employed some bricklayers to work on my house on a Saturday, I had the mixer whirling and first gauge of muck ready for knocking up. Well, this cunt just didn’t bother showing his face. What was even more fucking irritating is that his boss didn’t have the courtesy to call me to regale me with his employee’s excuses until the following Thursday. By then I had found a replacement.

    It was most satisfying having this cunt apologise to tell me his employee would return on the Saturday for me to tell him to forget about it as I was through with unreliable tradesmen and his coke/piss head brickie and his difficulty in getting out of bed in the morning. Cunts!

    • I reckon I had the best brickie ever when I had an extension built in the 90’s. He turned up at 8am, worked till 10, had a 15 minute break and something from a flask he brought every day then worked till 12:30 when he vanished for a 30 minute lunch. Back at 1pm till 3pm, another 15 minute break then he knocked off at 5pm. He never accepted an offer of a drink from us, just used the toilet as necessary. What’s more, he was English, friendly and his work ethic, and pride in his work, was palpable. It was a genuine pleasure watching an expert at work.

  9. Good nom.

    A lot of the local tradesmen (not all) in my local area are so fucking bad in this regard, that they unwittingly help promote our small business.
    For the very simple reason that we actually turn up when we say we will and if for whatever reason we can’t, then we try to contact the customer at least 24 hours beforehand.

    • Rings a bell. Where I used to live tradesmen answered their phones/emails and actually turned up. Where I live now they don’t.

      I did have one, where I called twice to try to get some help, call me back two months later (WTF?!). Another one I have to use regularly needs to be called/emailed about 10 times to get an answer (if there was an alternative I’d jump at it).
      I can only assume there must be too much work and too little tradesmen. Or maybe they really are lazy and ignorant (unts (the standard of their workmanship puts them in this category all by itself).

  10. It’s all relative, in my last job I was rarely late until the relocated me to an office 40 miles away, then most days I was late into the office. Rarely late on site unless traffic or weather got in the way, my boss would sometimes raise an eyebrow but he knew that I’d be the cunt who spent the weekend working on customer issues or in one case worked 48 hours straight recovering a customer’s data and virtual servers when their cluster got hit by an encryption virus.

    The cunts at the other end of the clock who leave at whatever their designated clock off time no matter the problem are sometimes worse than they ones who are occasionally a few minutes late.

    Builders can be a massive cunt, turn up on time, 2 hours lunch, cup of tea x 10. Fuck off then go AWOL on another more lucrative job for days or weeks.

  11. “I’m late! I’m late! For a very important date! No time to say hello, goodbye! I’m late! I’m late! I’m late!”.

  12. 10:30?! That’s Popmaster time. Anyone who arranges stuff then is a cunt from the start.

  13. Another excellent nomination as all are. 🙂

    I’ve been late to work a few times. Legitimate reasons of course.
    I think me being late is to make up for having been born early.
    🙂

    Also, when babies are born early, can they not be put back in until ready? Like an undercooked chicken is put back in the oven until fully cooked?

  14. My personal experience is that it’s the effnicks are the ones who struggle greatly with punctuality.

    After years of being a tradesman I got promoted to a team supervisor (worst job I ever had)

    My team consisted of quite a few effnicks of various origin but it was mainly the afro-carribean ones who thought turning up at 11am for a 8am shift on a daily basis was the norm and of course I also had a couple of obligatory coccaine users who were incapacitated every weekday and also couldn’t get out of bed.

    After my first month of taking heat off customers for their lateness and general ‘could’nt give a fuck attitude’ I called a team meeting and basically told them I was sick of their shit and that disciplinary action against them would follow.

    I was shocked that within hours of the meeting ending I was inundated with legal threats from my employees various trade unions officials because I had threatened disciplinary action against them for their lateness and my HR department berating me for going ‘too hard’ on the lads and that they all do their hours in one way or another!

    That was the final straw for me. That same afternoon, I drove the short distance to our head office. Parked the van up. Walked straight into the operation manager’s office and told him everything that had happened. I then also told him to keep his job and give it to one of his coke heads or one of the many other cunts that couldn’t turn up on time.

    I then told him how soon they would be out of business which funnily enough happened 18 months later.

    The moral of the story is that by getting up early everyday, being on time for work, having a 100% attendance record and not being an arsehole for over 30 years of work life meant I could pay off my mortgage early, invest my money into property, have a big savings pool and ultimately tell the operations manager cunt to go fuck himself hahahaha.

    I remember opening a can of Stella on the train home not even remotely remorseful or worried about what my missus would say.

    Nowadays I’m a self employed sparks. I just take the small domestic jobs on and work Tue/Wed/Thurs. I’m always on time, I dont piss people around and if a job is too big, or I don’t fancy it, I’ll always be honest with the customer.
    Best thing is my property investments are paying dividends and give me the freedom to work how I want.

  15. I’ve never minded being late if it meant I was doing something that needed to be done beforehand.

    I did somewhat ironically laugh during my last job when I used to phone up or text folk and say I was running late, but would be there at so and so time. They’d thank me, saying that their actual Social Worker never bothered doing that.

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