Puffed-up Ponsy Celeb Chefs.

Just read an interview with Michel Roux Jr (there was an earlier version of the cunt).

He is furious. He could have throttled the govt when they had the gall to close down his top persons’ cafe in the west end. I mean didn’t they realise these sort of people don’t contract viruses? They pay others to do that for them.

Roux says of the govt: “It was appalling what they did to us.”

Poor Michel (who trained those gentle, humble souls Gordon Ramsey and Michel Pierre White) is at his wit’s end. And really his prices are quite reasonable – £76 for a 3 course lunch (with wine). Or if you are more than just peckish an 8 course dinner (with wine) just £373. Each. I mean, it makes a change from maccyDs or domino’s.

He did furlough his staff though (thank you nasty govt).

And his restaurant is due to reopen soon but he is not sure there will be so many mugs around to pay such sums for fancy food now when it is, in reality, tomorrow’s waste product.

Will you be joining the queue for le Roux?

Like all celeb cooks (for that is what they are, not fucking artists) he is a pretentious prat.

Nominated by: Lord Helpuss

43 thoughts on “Puffed-up Ponsy Celeb Chefs.

  1. He’s just upset that he hasn’t been able to steal the tips of his employees. They guy’s a fucking grade a nob.

    • That reminds me of the Kitchen Nightmares episode with Amy’s Baking Company. Apparently they’re in Israel now and the woman has been in trouble with the law since.

  2. I’m sure before too long, he and the other cooks who ponce round TV studios powdered and painted, will be mincing in the kitchen again.

  3. Roux Snr fecked off to Swizzeland because of concern over public safety in the UK. Can’t really fault him for that observation! When I went there a few years ago there was no rubbish on the streets, everyone was quiet after 10pm, and it was predominantly white. Fucking incredible experience.

  4. It’s no surprise that these overblown fucking cooks are cunts. They rely on dull cunts to pay their prices. I will laugh my bollocks off when the fuckers go bust.

    • Very true, Dick Dribbler. I previously worked in catering for a number of years. It is a thankless vocation thanks largely to cunt employers. Working long hours for either a per shift agreed up amount; or being coerced by a culture of unity and silence to continue working beyond knock off time for the good of the establishment is standard operating procedure. These crook bloody practices are sanctioned by each individual employer and vary slightly from place to place. But the industry overall is rife with rorting, which includes massive overcharging for food items that cost a fraction of what they are sold for. I understand the basics of business. I know if I enter an eatery I am paying once I cross the threshold until once I leave. But paying to support small business and what it represents is markedly different to lining some greasy proprietor cunt’s pockets so he can walk away with a waterfront mansion and millions in the bank. Those in the link you provided are total cunts in my view. I especially dislike the George excrescence. Watching an episode of the Australian version of MasterCunt one time I concluded that he made Greg Wallace from a similar type of programme in your glorious country that I had seen when I lived there meek and humble by comparison. As for the ponytailed cunt. He started off alright. He worked hard, was very hands on and created a dedicated team of properly paid employees who together with their employer had a loyal following from the general pop. And importantly his prices were not stratospheric. But the cunt got greedy, and I think also might of started doing a lot of blow. Which in my book makes him even more of corrupt, suspect underage abusing cunt.

      • Apols for the slight butchered English. I hurriedly posted without proofreading. Please feel free to edit. Cheers.

      • George’s empire is crumbling from what I read, though I bet he’ll not be the one to suffer financially. Its always staff, suppliers, the ATO and the landlords that lose out.
        Greasy, ponytailed Neil Perry was my pet hate, though. Ate once at one of his Sydney Rockpool establishments (and suffered in flight Qantas meals “inspired” him). Distinctly average. A decent pub could have done as good a steak at a fraction of the price. Also called himself a chef but never had formal qualifications to do so. He really was just a cook. No surprise he’s now supposed to be retiring.

      • Yes I read about the retirement. With several unearned (by him) million no doubt. I took a rec. sortie into town a couple of months ago. Just to look at the forever changing streetscapes. Any rate I saw the ponytailed one. He had some bird in tow, a little Asian piece half his age. Difficult to say whether or not they were actually together. A less than difficult conjecture however was the way he constantly rubbed his nose. I watched him for a short period of time only, but his itchy nose was conspicuously suspect. I’m no wowser, Dick. I don’t drink, drug or smoke, but I am a senior competitive athlete so I cannot. Those who do good for them, say I. But I have worked for employers who blew their employee’s wages at the casino or up their nose. It is such a cunt of a thing to do it defies logic.

  5. Londonstan has enough vacious types to keep him in business, so don’t know why he’s so worried, London is starting to look a bit like Harare or Bulawayo now, spot the whitey was a game last time I was there, so maybe that’s why he’s worried as the effnicks mostly eat stolen sheep and curry not five star overpriced fare!, obviously he’s quite a wise cunt, as he’s seen his days in London maybe numbered!

    • I won’t be visiting his establishment. I have it on good authority that they don’t serve potato hash with beetroot.

  6. I’ve barely eaten anything during lockdown.
    Spent most of the time making myself throw up whilst wearing a thin waterproof jacket.
    Doctor reckons it’s Anoraxia….

    • Good joke JRC.

      Reminds of the PakistanI market trader who went on Mastermind.

      His specialist subject was:
      Anoraks: 1499 to 1999.

  7. What the fuck is he doing posing with a bust of Lammy, surely Lammy wouldn’t be allowed in a posh restaurant (well maybe a chigun shop with napkins).

    I see the government are bailing out the luvvies, theatres and museums, maybe the national museums and galleries should start charging entry again, the punter pays rather than saddling the whole country with the bill.

    I am afraid my taste buds probably wouldn’t recognise the difference in quality between and overpriced steak and a reasonably priced one, the cunts who overcharge because of the name should be referred to trading standards.

    • I used to earn good money when living in London and went to some fairly expensive restaurants but stopped because, like you, I simply couldn’t tell the difference between supposedly high end cooking and what I was capable of cooking at home. I also realised that I much preferred basic, simple stuff than anything extravagant, certainly more The Greasy Spoon than Le Gavroche. At home I can eat whatever I fancy, made the way I like it, with or without any extras and at a fraction of the price. No contest.

  8. Avoid paying for expensive oysters by simply drinking sea water from an ashtray….

    …a Viz top tip.

  9. Isn’t it so pretentious cunts can outdo all of their friends by spending a fortune on over elaborate bollox to show how successful and knowledgable they are just like they are when viewing art and claim to understand the artists genius when he paints an ashtray or unmade bed.
    Just rich cunts being ripped off but these days claiming they are socialists.

  10. Cooking. Turning raw stuff into food using heat.
    Anyone can do it – even chefs.
    Cunts, but I notice the lithping lowlife Jamie Oliver walked away with Millions after shutting his shite, overpriced overrated restaurants and making desperate people who were already broke destitute as he sits in his mansion.

      • I’m going to hate myself for saying it, but, I do like some of his recipes. Do them myself. Easy to do and versy tasty. He’s still a rubber-lipped cunt, though.

  11. If your food arrives all stacked in the middle of a plate surrounded by ‘jus’ in a neat swirl, just knock it over, spread it out and then complain that you don’t remember ordering from the children’s menu.

    Goodbye for now.

    • This evening I am having sausages with cheese and onion mash and baked beans. It’s all cooked, the sausages are cut into pieces, I will microwave the spuds, heat the sausage pieces in the beans and mix it all up. I can eat it with a spoon, read what’s on here and watch a Christmas film, all at the same time. And to prepare for this gastronomical delight I am partaking of a box of Asda Shiraz. My life may well be of the pleb varietybut it suits me just fine. Restaurants? Fuck ’em.

      • ‘Christmas film’? Which one? Can’t beat a good Christmas film. (I’m a cunt – so what?)

      • Movies 24 do Christmas in July, as it says, Hallmark romcom mainly but they suit my mood.

      • Wouldn’t surprise me if some of these cunt chefs did something similar in their restaurant kitchens, but pass it off as something posh and a la cunt, and “that’ll be £245.50, sir!”

  12. The Artist formerly know as Prince Harry has been spouting a load of ill informed malarky once again.

    What is the target of his soy-fuelled ire you ask?
    In his latest episode of ill informed wokery, he’s taken a swipe at the Commonwealth it appears.

    You know – that thing his Gran’s in charge of. That’ll be an interesting conversation over zoom with your Grandma won’t Hazmat.

    “It needs to acknowledge its colonial past”.

    Oh right of course. Well trouble is the Commonwealth in part was set up to right some of the wrongs caused by the British Empire.
    Many of the countries that are in the commonwealth have done very well out of being in the Commonwealth – like Canada, you know that country you went to live in (beautiful country btw) and then decided to move to the shithole that is LA.
    I believe India has done rather well out of it too.

    Forgive me for saying my dear boy, but you’ve done rather well out of the Commonwealth too haven’t you.

    Shame he can’t go and read a book about it and educate himself. He’s got plenty of time on his hands with no job or committments or anything.

    I’m going for a walk, he’s given me a tension headache.

    I’m just going outside for a bit. I may be some time….

    • Remember where the tent is. And make sure no eastern European squatter nicks it.

    • No doubt the next Commonwealth Games in Birmingham 2022 will either be cancelled or full of protesters.

      Of course one wonders what old Queenie thinks of the Boy Harry’s comments!

      Perhaps she should suggest he and Ms Sparkletits take a road-trip through a long tunnel with a drunk driver up front!

  13. Fat lip Jamie Oliver is a classic example of a celeb cook cunt being taking too seriously.

    He poked his big nose into school dinners and the cretinous Cameron govt allowed him to change the menu to what Oliver thought they should eat. So called healthy food.

    The result was that the kids stopped eating school dinners and took lunch packs instead.

    Jamie can’t even blame covid for his restaurant chain failure as it collapsed well before the pandemic. The real reason was that he offered overpriced crap and people finally sussed him out. He did blame brexit though. Cunt. And typical of his creed of cocky celeb cooks.

    • I hate that lispy fuck Oliver any cunt who gives kids the names he gave his should be in a fucking asylum fucking telling kids what they should be eating. Sure the cunt laid off staff before doing a million pound renovation to his house I heard he didn’t even pay them properly greedy slimey mongey cunt

  14. I remember years ago that cunt Nick Nairns marinading raw chicken and pork then after his cheffy bollocks pouring said marinade over a salad. He got called out for it, went all red faced and TV being TV they moved straight on. Celeb Chefs are cunts and chancers, and I wouldn’t be seen dead in one of their establishments. And don’t get me started on sweaty Rick and cheeky chappie Jamie.

  15. Oh please do start on them .
    Smug, egotistical, vastly overated cuts the lot of them. And they all look so unsavoury – I wouldn’t want any of these dribbling, lick-spittle twats anywhere near anything I eat.

  16. There’s a whole bunch of these so called celebrity chiefs/wankers They earn far too much money for doing virtually nothing The best bet is round them all up and put them on a desert island to rot 👎👎
    That smug foul mouthed so called hard man Gordon Ramsey being the first 👍👍

    • They could all live on that fat smug bastard James Martin Slice a bit off and fry him every day 👍👍

  17. The latest rabble can all fuck off into their ‘sous-vide’ but Keith Floyd was the bollocks.
    An original and the best culinary entertainment. I follow his example, sometimes I even make meals as well.

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