Experts

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‘Listen to the experts.’

I’m honestly sick of this mentality that we should listen to these ‘experts’ in lieu of thinking for ourselves. It was experts who advised Churchill to return to the Gold Standard. It was experts who advocated for appeasement. It was experts who failed to see the financial crash coming.

So no, I will not listen to the fucking ‘experts.’

Nominated by General Tso’s Chiggun

36 thoughts on “Experts”

  1. Listen to your own Jüdgëmënt thats all,
    These ‘experts’ have a agenda, either lying on some lefty viewpoint or lying on some goverment viewpoint.
    All can suck my plums.
    Look through the bollocks you can usually see a angle of some sort.

  2. I’d probably want an expert if I was having open-heart surgery.

    🙂 .

      • Oh I have Cunstable….it’s as black as Gandhi’s arse and as hard as fucking bell-metal…that’s all.

      • hes wid da angles now babe serve tha old cunt rite…ha ha (lots of smiley faces) you ok babe

        Afternoon,DCI

  3. I have watched these experts queuing up to give opinions. They all seem to be experts in hindsight.

  4. Why do they always go for the usual suspects? There’s plenty of ‘experts’ on Farcebook, Twatter, The Daily Hate and other Soshul Meeja sites with no experience in fuck-all bar scratching their arses that are always willing to give you their ‘expert’ opinion on anything. There’re one or two on this fine site, too.

    I visibly shudder at the opening gambit, ‘Do you need a hand, I’m a first aider….’.

    • I can understand that DCI, though it’s got to be marginally preferable to ‘let me through, I’m a necrophiliac…’

      • As long as I could film it!

        What’s the only warm thing left inside a female corpse?

        My cock.

        Coat’s on….

  5. It is inconceivable that the ‘experts’ were lending money to people who couldn’t afford to repay it, what was in fact money the lenders didn’t actually have, and then collecting as much of it together as possible tying a ribbon around it and then selling the debt to other people who couldn’t afford the actual risk, however that’s what happened 😂 they called it Casino banking

    Fucking experts, give a scenario to 10 economists and you get 10 different answers,
    What gets me are the cunts who have all the answers after the fact and claim they would have done things differently.

    You don’t need to be an expert to work out that if a virus starts in China stopping it involves making sure it doesn’t get out of China, that’s what the WHO is supposed to do. Just going test, test, test doesn’t really cut it.

  6. I’m an expert in telling people to go fuck yourselves.
    Go fuck yourselves.

  7. So much for the expert advice on social distancing, lockdown and gatherings of people? Went aaaaht to get a takeaway today and the place (Harrow Road) was heaving with cunts probably up to no good or simply hanging abaaaaaht because of the nice weather.
    Too many people in British cities and too many plebs and unimportant people getting in the way.
    My expert opinion is that they should make all the plebs live outside of London and give them a day pass or to enter for work etc, after that they can fuck off aaaaht of town.
    Go fuck yourselves.

    • The whole purpose of London is to concentrate cunts in one shithole. You can keep the fuckers.

      • London should only be for the mega cunts like me CC. These lesser cunts are getting in the way. 😁

  8. Politicians get the experts they deserve. They get shit selfpromoting ‘experts’ who have in fact passed their academic sell-by dates and have spent years as shit selfpromoting management , because the politicians all have arts degrees and have no way of judging the experts’ quality.

    Speaking as an expert…

  9. Always so many experts when it comes to policing matters. Little cunt, looked like an adverrising type, in a queue the other day as I was waiting for my lunchtime sarnie, bleating how many police cars went to an incident that turned out to be for one cunt. His face was a picture when I loomed over him and asked for a loan of his crystal ball so the police could use it to generate the appropriate response and how was his application for the police going as an expert like him should be fast-tracked. Cunt went as red as his tie as everyone looked at him. Mumbled something about paramedics doing a good job and fucked off. ‘Yeah, and so do the police’ was my retort. I’m going to be my own patient one say

  10. Speaking of experts, I had the misfortune of hearing David Lammy on Radio4 earlier this afternoon. Apparently he had a friend who died from Covid-19.

    And an uncle too…

    He didn’t say he doesn’t like to talk about it though. But he will.

    • Poor old Lammy! It’s such a fucking waaycist, that virus, singling out the BAMEs like it does.

    • And I believe Covid19 started in Grenfell, caused by whitey to be mean to the poor BAME’s – an “expert” who “lost a friend” there told me..
      “Experts” told us to appease the nazis – that worked well.
      “Experts” were hired to change the Common Market into the European Commission and the European “Union”.
      “Experts” told us to join the ECU – which was a disaster.
      “Experts” told us to join the ERM, which brought the UK to within 20 minutes of being declared bankrupt.
      “Experts” repeatedly told us to give up Sterling and adopt the Euro.
      “Experts” told us it was wise financial policy to give Mortgages to people with no income, jobs or assets – but luckily it didn’t lead to a credit crunch and Worldwide financial disaster which the poor will spend the rest of their lives paying for.
      “Experts” have failed to predict a single major financial downturn in the last Hundred Years.
      “Experts” told us Thalidomide was safe.
      “Experts” told us nuclear power was safe and would half our electricity bills.
      “Experts” told us China was benign.
      I am glad I do not have this kind of expertise.
      “Experts”? – if I could borrow from DF and JTC for a moment – “Fuck off and get to fuck”.
      Excellent nom 👍

      • I reckon experts don’t even know how to wipe their own arses. Of course, I’m prepared to admit I could be wrong. Unlike a expert.

      • Interesting post that Freddie – “experts” remind me of toilets – lots of them about and generally full of shit.

  12. The kind of expert I’d like to meet is a pretty twenty two year old who knows her way around a cock. But I wouldn’t want to get engaged or anything.

    • You’re absolutely right Cuntybollocks, the experts who matter are too busy doing their fucking jobs to appear on endless cunt news shows.

  14. I have had to bite my tongue and met a few experts, I am not one.
    My first inclusion into the world of “Blowing shit up” involved the instructor throwing the delay fuse a little bit close to us.
    Later in life I hat to meet the “Mine Man” their explosive technician, I looked him straight in the eye reached out my hand and had a 3 finger hand shake, that was worrying.
    My French colleague (mentioned him before) was part of an assault group in Sisak,
    A lorry had been rammed side ways across a street forming a barricade, a very effective one I may say, so their explosive expert had been called up, The plan was simple, blow the truck and and push through with the BVP,s .
    He went forward to check the handy work and apart from the plastic the chap had thrown in a shit load of anti tank mines for good measure (different blast speeds one cuts one crushes) (36,000ftps as opposed to 21,000ftps).
    So the story is, The expert Pressed the button, the truck fucked off likewise the buildings on each side, the blast and the dust cloud fucked up the assault group and there was a very big hole in the ground.

  15. In 1997, two academics, Robert C. Merton and Myron Scholes, won the Nobel Prize for Economics for developing a “pioneering formula for the valuation of stock options”, according to the halfwits in Stockholm who chose them. Anyone with a modicum of financial sense knows that options are dynamite and cannot be valued as they nothing but a bet. That is the whole point of them. You might make a bomb if you are lucky but you will be blown up by a bomb if you are not

    Scholes was a founder of a hedge fund called Long Term Capital Management which made amazing returns of over 40% in its first years. However, in 1998, a year after the Swedes – or should that be Turnips – chose Scholes, the fund lost $4.6 billion overnight. Why? Because the Black-Scholes theory was full of holes and had overlooked anomalies in the market.

    Maybe they would have been better choosing that well-known intellectual and financial expert Paul Scholes and his mate Gary Neville.

  17. I was amazed to hear on Wireless 4 on Friday that departmental stores will try to get customers back by employing “Social Distancing Advisers” to nurture the worried well, those Karens who will not venture out without their cricket boxes over their noses. Can you imagine? No doubt Jess Phillips and all those people who signed up to be “contact tracers” will be joinging their ranks. I suppose it beats gawping behind the lace curtains of suburbia.

  19. Plenty of experts on Twitter.

    I know this because they’ were keen on telling me so. They teach children a subject therefore they are ecperts in their field.

    I think it’s called the Dunning-Kruger effect.

    It’s a bit like an RE teacher who takes extra curricular stargazing sessions calling himself an ‘astronomer-bishop’.

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