Lock down UK

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So we have been expecting this for some time to curve the spike.

So Cunter’s, what are you up to? what are your secrets to isolation and are you the fabled bog roll hoarders.

Please comment below.

Admin

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213 thoughts on “Lock down UK”

  1. Apart from not being able to go to the library this is normality for me.

    you see cunt immunity! we have shunned the fuckers for years! good stuff carry on cunting!

  2. Isolation? Read books, catch up on TV? X-Hamster? Hoarders and stockpilers? I’d give the cunts a 9mm pain-relief tablet right between their selfish fucking eyes.

    Frontline NHS so it’s only a matter of time for me!🚑🚑

    • +1 for x-hamster 😉

      I can not understand the members interest in that site! X videos has far more content and a much vaster library of Dwarf porn!

      • Me and my sister much prefer pornhub. Excellent library of fisting movies.

      • I was once informed that there is a website devoted to ladies licking arse grapes (piles). ‘Pilelickers’ or something.

        I’m not googling it to check, fuck that. What the fuck is wrong with this world?

  3. Yesterday I went to the local asian corner store and bought 48 cans of Skol Super so I won’t really care about anything until I run out of beer. Got food, got arse wipe and a garage full of motorcycles to piss about with. It’ll be heaven not having to go out for a few weeks.

      • Same here. Couple of vintage bikes to sort and a big pile of old radio gear to get working prior to being shoved on eBay.
        Plenty of scoff and alcohol so fuck going anywhere.
        Joys of self employment 😀😀😀

      • Done! Last week 2k+ profit, this week £11.00 so far – only a matter of time before I go feral and start leaping out hacking pieces off fatties for dinner – and I am much faster on my feet than those perspiring porcines!
        Realistically speaking, I can go another 2 Months with no income then I will have to fold.
        Could I also suggest all fellow ISAC’ers drop The Chancellor of the Exchequer an email to ask him to move his f*cking a*se and DO something about this ASAP.
        rishi.sunak.mp@parliament.uk – I think my situation will have gone belly up before anything is done and I am sure there are many others in a worse situation than me.

      • Hope things go ok for you Foxy, your a decent bloke an its hard to stomach when your business takes a hit.
        Im working this week but if they say im to stop.
        Ill be fucked within a month.
        Pay me to stay home I’ll do it but cant survive on benefits, to many overheads.

      • Yeah, I’ve got a vintage Mrs to sort out. It’s a dirty job but somebody has to do it.

      • Rissen, I got pagowin arseho if like? Popurar with Chinese peepur. Better if pangowin arse just have shit. Then eat up it speshu magic make dingdong velly big. Eat du pangowin shitty arse. Good for you.

      • Sounds infinitely better than the fucking absolute shite left on my local Tesco shelves …..
        panic buying hoarding CUNTS !!

  4. But is it lockdown? The cunt Boris speaks with forked tongue. There is still nothing mandatory here. We don’t have the police resources to enforce this. Have the police been instructed to stop knocking on doors chasing hate crimes? I think Boris is doing his best to hand Labour a lifeline. Get fuckin’ tough you idiot.

    • Until Boris brings about martial law you’ll still get millions of cunts completely ignoring his diktats.

      The fact that you had hundreds of cards queuing in Snowdonia last weekend; or hundreds of people walking through parks in London (according to the BBC tonight), it is clear some people just do no give a shit!

      So even after tonight’s statement you’ll still get twats doing whatever they want in complete deviance, as well as knowing the old bill can’t cope.

      Boris isn’t responsible for the sheer selfish stupidity of some people in this country short of locking the fuckers up

    • Bertie he’s acutely aware of us freedom loving Brits so he is tempering orders with requests.
      He’s relying on our good will so we must comply and use our nogins. If arses behave like arses then the bizzies will lift them.
      It’s tough but we got to do what we got to do.

      • The bad news Bertie. During Obama’s time and Iraq there was a debate what the word ‘surge’ meant. A surge of soldiers.
        Cut to it – with the pictures coming out of Italy we will soon know what the wird ‘surge’ means.
        The good news. That number in Italy is crucial. And there is a glimmer of hope that they have reached the peak and started to turn the tide.

      • The trouble with Boris, Mac, is that nobody Knows when to take him seriously. When you lack statesmanship, you have difficulty taking people along with you.

  5. My plans? Xbox, YouTube and Netflix. Oh, and Andrew Roberts Churchill book.

    • Red dead online poker for me. Playing tight aggressive gameplay (lots of folding) so the game goes on all day.

      • I’ve been meaning to try the Red Dead games for a while. Any good?

  6. I am a key worker (NHS) and thus, it is business as usual for me. My parents are old but savvy and my boyfriend is working from home. We have a garden and a large house so, in the event of any marital discord , I can always go to my study and watch you tube. Sure, I miss the gym,cinema and Starbucks, but dying of some Chinky bat flu is not something I relish.

    God save the Queen.

      • Will this save the Villa from relegation Ron? At least they have cancelled the Olympic bore fest and London Pride, little Owen wont be happy. With any luck Notting Hill Carnival too, should improve the Met’s crime stats if nothing else.

  7. Cunt is as cuntish does. Or words to that effect. Far more people will die of chlerosis of the liver than flu. Fuck iiiiittttt……………

  8. Cunt is as cuntish does. Or words to that effect. Far more people will die of chlerosis of the liver than flu. Fuck iiiiittttt……………

    • About 400 people a year die from liver disease in this country.

      336 people have already died from Coronavirus in this month alone.

      Current estimate 100,000+ to die in the UK.

  9. At first i admit i thought this was all bollocks, bit over the top, people being mardarses.
    Not so much as the body count rises.
    Ive social excluded last couple of days, enjoyed it!
    Working this week an just see how it goes, Bojo said can go to an from work.

  10. Boris has just given his speech and for me, it’s too soft. We have too many thick, selfish gimps who just won’t fucking listen. Or care. The cops just said they only want to ‘police by consent’. Those idiots in places like London and Brighton (hmmmm interesting, eh) will not listen, I’m telling you!

    Get the tanks out for the lads, Boris! Grrrr. Etc.

    Me? Stay in. Read. Watch telly. Listen to music. Get the odd bj off the mrs if I play my cards right. Post bollocks on the internet.

    • I get what you mean but this is the UK not fucking China or Russia.
      Remember they serve us we don’t serve them so they must walk a fine line.

      • True but these are extraordinary times. Getting tough will save thousands of lives. Worth it for a few weeks in my opinion.

  11. If I’m cooped up with my missus for weeks on end, it won’t be a virus that kills her….

  12. Being self-employed in IT, I’ve had to call it a day on visits to SMBs and peoples’ homes, which means a loss of income (will the government pay 80% of my wedge? doubt it!)

    Just been on the Guardian’s site and already its taking pot shots at Boris for being “slow” with the lockdown compared to EU countries; which is ironic because a few days ago they were warning that any lockdown would be draconian and an over reaction!

    Cunts

  13. Little yellow bastards, hopefully tescos still open and has rum, if not, its going to be Fahrenheit 451 all over again.
    That is all.
    Arse biscuits.

      • Many thanks for your offer of such grand munificence, however I have successfully provided my bitter self with sufficient vittles. I suggest enjoying it yourself while catapulting ball bearings at any random walker.
        Good day to you sir.

  14. Look busy and keep your pecker up, that was the advice I was given.

  16. I will still be going to work as I can’t work from home, Boris said it was ok. Wait to see if company policy has changed and they can then tell me to stay at home.
    Have the police enough resources to enforce the restrictions, and what happens when the force is also hit by the virus.
    Main thing I am concerned about is my Mum and making sure of her wellbeing and that she has enough to eat.
    Other than that, the world is full of cuntish cunts.

  17. Well, I’m self-employed 3D Technical Artist and will suffer similar issues to Technocunt as the CAD that I use comes from China… and well, you guessed it.

    Basically my work has all but stopped…

    My wife works away and is stuck where she is for the moment (get in) so I can do whatever I want and I bloody well will 😉

    • I’m similar, I’ve worked from home for 15 years down in SW Somerset (web, app design, photoshop and after effects, illustrator et al) but I have an office in Bristol (Just been shut down) with a dozen employees. It’s going to be tight, we’ve just had several large contracts cancelled in the last week. I may have to get them all on three day weeks for a while, I’m not sure yet but I think we can pay full wage until end of May maybe. That’ll mostly likely mean myself and tother director going without wages. I’m fortunate to have a little saved up though so we’ll do the best we can for them. We have a company vid call on Skype every morning, everyone has to wear stupid hats each day and look like silly cunt totherwise it’s a bog roll in the kitty, full Indian headdress for me tomorrow and to fuck with your appropriation bollocks 🙂 it’s the little things…

  18. I am happy to self-violate, as decreed by Bozzer – not the type indulged in by B&WC, mind – I’d put me fucking back out trying…

  19. Day 9 of lockdown here in rainy Spain. Got a big project I’m working on in my house so keeping busy, Mrs is enjoying doing more cooking and baking. Shops full if we need anything which is a bonus. Weather has been shit in these parts since it started so not missing out on sunny days at the bar and I’ve not spent a single penny in ten days so not all bad.

  20. Thanks Admin. For once I might have more time to post. As for bog roll, I’m good, I don’t need any, my 21 year old tabby is a great substitute, and the cunt licks himself clean, it’s a win win. Can’t ya just tell I’m one of those fortunate fuckers that lives alone.
    I’m a locksmith, so apparently, I’m a key worker….
    On a more community spirited note, I can rent out my cat, either for walks or the day after you’ve dragged all the shit out of your bin to make a curry….fuck that poncy paper currency.

  21. well it will be business not as usual for me but old school (you know , back in the day and all of that shit 20 years ago)
    My firm is now on lock down, known customers only (account which includes your council providers) and guess who gets to run the gate!
    I am reasonably well protected, I have a full face mask but I do miss the command stick which made people fuck off when I pointed it at them.

  22. Up here in west Norfolk the police are stretched on a daily basis ( anywhere between 5-10 coppers on at any particular time) and whether you liked the idea of pcso’s or not they all got made redundant 2 years ago now so no local policing at all round here. The amount of fuckwit families and feral kids will no doubt pay no mind to all this and will go about their daily business of being cunts. No fines will deter them nor will the parents pay it anyway so I fear when the police start getting ill ( and I know of one already ) who will take up the slack? The Specials? Ha ha. The army?
    Have to wait and see I guess but it looks slightly ominous if this goes on for more than 4 weeks.
    I work for the NHS so will be going in to work. Just 11 cases tested positive here, 8 in beds 2 dead and 1 sent home as of today.
    No real panic but some of the young ones at work are serious snowflake contenders.
    Keep safe everyone, over before we know it and one massive piss up down the boozer when it’s all lifted.

    • Wtf do you mean up here in Norfolk. That’s south for me. It was fucking snowing here two days ago.😆😂

      • Accept my apologies still getting used to living here after 20 years. 😷

    • Maybe the government will finally fund the armed forces. It would be nice to have 500,000 troops instead of the 74,000(?) we have now.

    • Seems like a worrying percentage of deaths. As a percentage of infections to deaths, we’re miles worse off than Germany, Switzerland and Austria (worldometers site). It is worrying. I think Germany have had less than half our deaths with 5 times the number of infections.

      If you get it, fuck off to Germany if it’s possible. Get in the back of a lorry seems to work for many.

  23. I would just like to thank our amazing internet porn sites who do an amazing job at a time like this

  24. Won’t make the slightest of difference to me. I never socialise anyway. Only ever go out for exercise and to shop for perishable fresh foodstuffs. Got no transport so we’re used to using online delivery service for the bulk of our provisions.

    I think Boris got the balance about right.

  25. Well I will be back to ICU nursing which I escaped from five years ago. But this time it will be in a makeshift unit in the hospital with unfamiliar ventilators and staff with no ICU experience. If it all goes completely tits, they are anticipating that we will run out of drugs and oxygen. It’s going to be marvellous and on my days off I won’t be able to see my family. Fucking bastard dirty bat munchers. Betty is not amused.

  26. If we continue on our current trajectory then 6000 could be dead in 2 weeks and the NHS will be on its knees.
    All because selfish bellends who think this is all a bit of a laugh or know better couldn’t stay out of the pub last Friday night and fucking idiots in their thousands decided to march up Snowden.
    The lack of common sense in this country is embarrassing.

    • Is it too much to ask for that if 6000 are dead in 2 weeks can they all be parking Stanleys? 🙄

  27. How long do the government believe they can keep a lid on the citizens? Review in 3 weeks? The army will be on the streets before then I suspect. The enriched capital like many other cities will go bang before long.

    What price will we pay for this? Is the cure going to be worse than the disease?

    I hope we all make it through with our lives and property intact.

  28. X hamster….. dirty bastards.
    I will read,watch old videos,cook,do gardening and exercise like a demon you lazy fat cunts.
    Oh and keep up with this tip top site.

  29. Went out between 8-9 tonight and it was like a fucking ghost town, hardly any cars either.
    Staying at home? Well there’s nowhere to go anyway…..cunt has closed everything. Now they’ve got us where they always wanted us…..stuck in front of the idiot box. Watch out for the brainwashing. Oh…….and don’t forget to wash your hands.

  30. I’ve mastered the art of wanking without the need of toilet paper – sorted…

    • Aim for the toilet/use a sock/fire in the underpants before you put them in the wash.

      Any other suggestions?

      • I had a wank this afternoon watching Little Caprice being fucked by a big black cock. Used up one kitchen towel and two pieces of toilet paper and I still had to change my underpants afterwards.

      • A posh wank anyone? You could use the neatly tied rubbers to make a beautiful string instrument if you stretch them enough. Each wank will contain differing amounts of pork butter, so you can select the right notes….

      • The rubbers could then be used for an impromptu performance of Ode to Joy, sadly all the rage at the moment.
        Re Die Frumpenfuhrer, I am waiting for a wireless announcement on Vierter Reichsrundfunk, followed by Bruckner’s 7th symphony (adagio) and chunks of Wagner…

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