An Emergency, “fuck me, it’s cold”, cunting for these total bellends:
You can just see these pricks sat in the pub drinking some blue shit and nibbling a tofu burger:-
“Yo, do you all want a climb?
“Sounds great Tarquin. Let’s pop off now”.
What an unbelievable shower of supercunts. They should have been left just a bit longer until their gonads had shrivelled up beyond active use. Utter cunts.
Nominated by Bertram Cuntatious DCO
Students? What are they studying……….advanced stupidity? Let them fucking die I say. That’s a few less useless fucking cunts fucking things up.
22
Oh the joys of Education at the highest Levels!
What a fuck faced bunch of fucking irrisponsible retarded fucking imbeciles, with shit loads of fucking shit in their moronic bone domes.
People risked their lives to rescue this bucket of pig shit!
Should have thrown the fuckers off the top!
23
Totally agree the fucking idiots
5
I was thinking this morehat the fuck are our universities doing turning out people who are thick as pig shit and claiming they have Oxbridge degrees. Of course a number of politicians spring to mind, but these twats take the biscuit. On Sunday the RNLI , all volunteers, have to go out and rescue some surfers. On Sunday for Christ’s sake. You really think before being allowed near any university there should be some sort of National Service, doesn’t have to be military but it should teach you how to wipe your own arse.
17
Failing that, teach them how to wipe somebody else’s arse since that might be the only job they’re capable of.
13
And they would probably arse that up too!
6
Send these future members of the “intellectual elite” a whopping great bill for their rescue.
Thick chinless cunts.
Morning all…
13
Hit the cunts with a fucking bill for cost of rescue.
In fact I think mountain rescue should issue daily info wether it’s safe to go on the mountains and if you go against the advice fucking charge the cunts if they need rescuing.Or leave them to their own devices and call it natural selection.
Gobshites
15
Fucking Ramblers/trespassers/students(probably Gays)/townies…they’s have waited a while before the Hounds and I turned out to rescue them.
If I ever meet a group out hillwalking I always tell them that they’re actually going the wrong way and direct them towards the Army Ranges…especially when the red flag is up…that means live-firing.
16
Good Morning Dick. I often wonder how long it will be before an episode of ‘Vera’ features the goings on at Fiddler Towers.
Vera . . . . . Morning pet. I’d just like to ask you a few questions about two ramblers last seen in this area who didn’t return to their hotel last night. You’ve no objection if we examine your slurry pit have you Mr Fiddler?
Dick Fiddler . . . . . . . Why aye canny lass. What ye uptee the neet.
Do you own a Vera hat Dick? I believe you can now buy them on Newcastle market.
8
They actually film some of it near me,Bertie. I once saw what I genuinely took to be Police cars and several Coppers gathering away across the fields from me.
I spent a frantic hour locking several items in their approved cabinets, removing a few exotic blooms from the polytunnel and driving a couple of vehicles away up the wood….I then took the Hounds for a fucking long walk away up the Crags from where I could view proceedings without being seen.
Turned out it was Fucking Vera. The Auld Bitch’ll get a fucking steel-toecap up her clopper if she ever inconveniences me like that again.
13
PS….Her “Northumbrian” accent is appalling.
9
Evening m’Lord.
The auld biddy’s from Kunt, I believe. My ex had a best friend from roughly up your way, it’s a lovely accent, and she was a filthy slapper to boot. Just my type.
What do you reckon on Alston ? There’s a castle up for grabs, about £M1, or if you’re a nifty marauder, possibly first come, first serve…
2
I thought some of it might be filmed quite close to you. Things might get worse, as they’re doing 4 hour coach tours of the filming locations.
Apparently cunts are coming from all over the world to go on it, as the program is so popular. They can buy their Vera hats as part of the tour, so look out for coachloads of ‘Japs in silly hats.’
Mind you, you could cash in on it if you’re canny.
What do you think you could sell them?
3
Fucking Vera is like watching paint dry. And seeing her in a crime scene in a fucking mac while everyfucker else is in Elvis suits makes my piss boil. She also does all the interviews (on a beach, eating chips) herself. Makes Doxon of Dick Green look like a documentary.
Also, there seems to be a suspicious number of tinted brethren in the area.
This could be a cunting in itself, especially if Fiddler is an extra in the pub.
5
You could add Fiddler Towers to the itinerary for the full ‘Northumbrian experience’, things must be a bit quiet since the National Trust withdrew its status following the ‘unpleasantness’ over the LGBTQ+ rainbow badges for guides row.
4
I suppose I could flog them a bit of old wool to stick round their women’s minges if the videos are anything to go by.
Or a stay at my “Bridge On the River Coquet” holiday camp.
4
He could clean up here LL. with 4×4 all terrain tours or quad biking . . . . . .
Come to Fiddler Towers and try out our full
Rik Mayall quad bike experience.
5
LL.
I went to price some work at a Trust property and asked the boss about that…he admitted that most of their volunteers had threatened to quit. The policy has been quietly sidelined apparently.
4
They should be made to pay the cost of the rescue, going unprepared and without the required knowledge to be there.
Cunts
9
A more justified cunting I couldn’t imagine. The rescue team are being extremely gracious by calling these cunts ‘idiot’s’. The 22 strong volunteers put their lives well and truly put on the line for what..a fucking bet in the pub to see who could get the farthest in trainers?
I would like to see them billed for the rescue and forced to pay it in installments and if they defaulted sent to the pokey for a few months. In fact I don’t think rescues of this nature should be free when cunts are totally irresponsible anyway. I get sick of hearing about climbers getting into problems and then somebody has to get them out of it for free. CUNTS.
10
I went on an adventure training exercise in the hartz mountains in Germany.
The cunt who organised one of our “Rambles” had not worked out what contour lines were, our “Little stroll” turned into a fucking survival exercise, I think “Fuck the map lets get down to that road” was mentioned, we ran out of water and were miles away from our pick up point, and mobile phones had yet to be invented.
I also noticed the difference between the townies and the country boys (me).
The daft cunts were filling their water bottles with green gnat filled water from a cattle trough, whilst I just lifted the end cover and filled my bottle with fresh water from the ball cock valve.
(we had boots and everything, just led by a twat who could not read a map, (called SIR I think))
8
Did I read somewhere that they couldn’t speaka da language? (And hence make communication with their rescuers). Foreign ‘students’ my arse?
Okay, I know an angry Highland Rescuer giving it the full Glaswegian may be a tad incomprehensible but how the hell are these idiots even able to understand their tutors?
5
I doubt you’d get a Weegee up a mountain. More like the full Teuchter.
4
Nearly every online newspaper article that I clap eyes on these days, I initially think it’s satire. The world is getting barmier by the fucking minute! Trainers??!!! For fuck’s sake, that takes the biscuit. I’ve heard it all now. And the knock-on effect these idiots’ actions had . . . too much to bear. Beyond stupidity — give them all a Darwin Award!
5
Maybe when someone suggested ” let’s go up Ben Nevis” they thought they’d been invited to a sex party.
The new series of The Windsors is on Channel 4 soon. Brilliant piss take if you’ve never seen it tune in.
4
Yes, looking forward to it, they all play their roles really well.
3
Should have left their frozen corpses on the mountain to serve as a warning like they do on Everest.
Not quite sure that’s the real reason corpses are left on Everest but hey ho, it would work for me. Cunts.
10
Their attitude is typical these days, so many people imagine there’ll always be someone stupid enough to bail them out. They’re no different to those who are unemployed who decide to have a large family – someone else will pay. They have no sense of responsibility because there’s always a safety net.
In my view it’s not a good idea to put twenty two lives at risk to save four useless bastards.
7
Just let the stupid fuckers die. We are now seeing the effects of over protective parenting and when nothing is little Johnny’s (insert name of choice) fault. Spoilt to death from birth, cars/driving lessons paid for them as soon as they are 17, having to be woken up for appointments because they cannot operate an alarm clock, driven to said appointments because they can’t find their own way there and probably late, the list is endless. I was in our local shop in the summer and the woman owner was moaning to one of the customers about her son who had to attend a wedding that day. Apparently the stupid fucking cow took his suit to the dry cleaners for him because he ‘forgot’ and whilst I was in the shop she contacted him on his mobile phone to tell the braindead shit he had left his sunglasses there as if he was going to die without them. Anyway, it transpired he is 22 years old and I thought fuck me, at that age I had been in full time employment for 6 years. I was very close to telling her to stop babying him and he was never going to learn by not thinking for himself but I bit my tongue.
8
The mountain rescue team should have gone to the pub instead.
No weather to be rescuing cunts in.
Get to fuck.
8
Leave ’em up there for the crows.
When the weather gets a bit better, hang painted boards from the corpses saying “this is what happens to silly cunts who decide to climb a mountain with no equipment” or the like.
Might deter the next bunch of cunts (there’s ALWAYS a next bunch)…….or maybe not. Who gives a toss- leave those fuckers up there as well.
5
Students are fucking thick, total lack of common sense!
On common sense, Breaking News, the High Court have shown common sense on tweets about trans, the expression of opinion that a man cannot become a woman and vice versa is Not Unlawful,
Wait for the Owen Jones crew to be crying all over the media!
8
Shocking this was allowed to happen in the first place. It was officially recorded as a ‘non-crime hate incident’ and he was told to ‘check his thinking’. God bless every cunt who made an effort to challenge this genuinely sinister development in our once free country.
4
I don’t think, I am absolutely sure that a man cannot be woman, however I suppose with some Frankenstein like surgery they could have a pretty good try 😂
Gender recognition, cock and balls = man. Fanny and the back up bits = woman
3
Owen Jones will NEVER look as good as Oddbod !
0
I trained at BSM years ago as a driving instructor and one of the first things our staff instructor told us was that supposedly intelligent types eg students, teachers, lecturers etc were the hardest people, in general to teach as they just don’t take in what they’re told and can be guaranteed to do something fucking stupid now and again.
9
It never ceases to amaze me that there are still dumb fucks that go up mountains without checking the weather first, that fact that they are students who were probable on the piss thehe night before shouldn’t surprise me either due to 90 percent of all students are infact totally braindead wankers giving it a lat attempt tp waste a few more years before having to get a job a be responsible knowing that if it all goes pear shaped they will be bailed out, its the same with going up a mountain in flipflops with a bag of Doritos, when it all goes wrong someone will risk life and limb to save our worthless hides, if it was up to the fuckers would stay there or pay for the rescue efforts in full the stupid student cunts should stick to jumping on cars on their way home from the pub, utter braindead cunts….
7
All the qualifications to end up in parliament , possibly a future PM
4
Every fucking year this happens.
Send the cunts a bill for their rescue.
Fuck em
Cunts
6
These foreign wankers apparently sent a ‘generous’ thankyou package of whiskey and biscuits or some shit to the rescuers. Fuck off, repay the taxpayer you cunts. Probably moaning about having to pay for their own further eduction the day before, believing everything is for some other cunt to fund or organinse while they enjoy the same life of riley they did as children.
They should be billed, simple as that. I remember a group of south asian cunts drowned at the seaside a couple of years ago and the families started a campaign for more life guards nationwide. Take responsibility in the great outdoors you entitled cunts. Check the weather, check the tides, check the advice, read the signs posted for your safety and follow those instructions. This fucking attitude of state dependency, that if there’s a danger taxpayer-funded staff need to be standing there to stop me putting myself in harms way needs to be called out and damned.
8
Nothing further to add, except my sympathy to the Lochaber team, and congratulations on getting the cunts off alive (which is the point of a MR team, sometimes regrettably).
Cunts beyond my imaginative powers to cunt adequately.
2
Students must now qualify the least intelligent people in society, rivalled by scrotes who hang around bus stations, KFC and swill Carling in Wetherspoons
Nine grand a year to polish a turd.
3
Leave the cunts to freeze. Next.
2
Top candidates for the Darwin Awards but unfortunately the cunts didn’t die so are ineligible.
Fucking students ! always were and always will be cunts.
1