Nicole Lyons

Posted on by

A strong and independent woman who only remains at large thanks to female privilege and a weak-as-piss judicial system.

This aggrieved forehead suffered the trauma of knock down ginger – the game where kids rings someone’s doorbell then leg it. Her response? To threaten to kill the kids at the top of her lungs, get into her car and deliberately run them over:

https://metro.co.uk/2020/01/16/bmw-driver-rammed-children-playing-knock-door-run-house-12068539/

Apparently, the courts regard threatening to murder children and deliberately driving your car into them with the intention to harm as fairly minor, if you’re a woman with a previous conviction for drunk driving. Claims she was only going slowly, but quick enough to break one of their legs. Found guilty of grievous bodily harm, dangerous driving, assault, failing to stop and failing to report an accident, but not a day in prison.

Either there’s something rotten in our legal system or her lawyer’s got Jedi mind powers.

Nominated by Dr Shagga and His Cunt Munching Machine

93 thoughts on “Nicole Lyons”

  1. Knock Down Ginger where your doorbell is rung and before you’ve had time to open the door, the wankers have run away leaving you with nothing.

    It’s a bit like an Amazon delivery.

  2. She’s ‘a woman of colour’ Dr.
    A white male would get banged up for certain in this situation.

  3. I bet she doesn’t Bake Great Family Cakes.

    I bet the only thing she was baking was a giant shit, when faced with the prospect of a custodial sentence.

    This woman is a fucking headcase loon and will surely injure or kill some other poor sod somewhere down the line.

  4. She looks a bit like Katie Holmes but is too skinny for me, the judge obviously took a fancy to her though. She better hope the kids don’t have dads who can handle themselves, but something tells me these kids have no idea who their dad is anyway.

  5. When I was a kid we had to stop playing knock down ginger when the cunt moved to another school…

      • Religious types like Martin Luther King and I, like the buxom bottomed.

      • Howdy doody Fenton.

        Only just clocked your post, presumably you were moderated for using the cüm word… 🙄

        Btw, for all you discerning film buffs out there, now showing on Talking Pictures TV (channel 81): ‘I See A Dark Key Stranger’ starring Trevor Howard.

      • Id be scared of breaking her!
        Bet shes only 6stone? Like a toy or summat!
        My 20stone leaps on her, go right through her ribs!!
        Pretty enough but need something more robust oh an not mental

  7. Knock down Ginger? Weird name, we called it ‘knock n run’ no ginger.
    She overreacted, be loads of kids knockin now!
    Nature of kids, that mental bird run over little Dylan an kyle, dare you to knock!”
    What sentence did she get? 3 points on her license?

      • I’d buy that. A Jeremy Kyle mug. ‘Put something on the end of it!’ written beneath the face.

        And to think he was king of daytime television. Not only here but in America at one point.

        How the mighty have fallen.

        Mind you Noel Edmonds came back.

  8. Looks native but with a spray tan? Didn’t realise they could get away with it… in your country.

  9. Would of liked to of seen the kids faces when a accelerating car full beam headlights is bearing down on the little bastards!
    Fuck em the little twats, toughen em up!
    Sorry Shagga ive thought on this,
    Bet theyd been doing it for weeks an she snapped!

  10. Using a vehicle to deliberately target pedestrians, let me think…. isn’t that a terrorist attack.

    What the fuck would she have needed to do to get a spell in the clink!

    CUNT!

  11. Knocking down shit head trouble making little bastards should be legal as far as I’m concerned. Especially if they are Pakistanis.

    • If the kids were pakistani’s the male-guardians would’ve torn her to bits by now.

      • If the parents were Parking Stanley’s they would have tore her to bits when she was 10 years old.

    • Agreed, FH.

      I can’t condone effectively getting away with assault with a car. That said, I must admit I laughed out loud at the thought of those feral vermin giving it large by trespassing and antagonising this silly deranged cow, then having a Beemer hunting them down on a seek and destroy mission. Top marks for that.

  12. Fucking fruitcake of the highest order….fake tans, BMWs, bad photos, orangey colour…all hallmarks of a total cunt.

  13. Tie the cunt down in the middle of the road with her legs apart, then get a motocross bike with the ice spiked wheels and drive up her cunt!
    See if she like that.
    Cunt!

  16. The parents could take a contract out on her. I’m not suggesting it but wouldn’t it be a surprise if she wound up face down in a quarry somewhere with multiple injuries. Once again not suggesting it but hey stranger things have happened.
    I know for a fact there are people out there who wouldn’t take this lying down. Some tan wannabe runs your child down and get almost zero punishment? Nope I don’t think so. Watch out for her having an unfortunate accident .

    • I remember when deliberately running over kids in your Beamer was frowned upon in this country.

      • In my day we considered ourselves lucky to be run over by a Robin Reliant
        Nowadays its a BMW or Range rover!
        Spoilt little bastards.

  17. Perhaps she went a tad far running them down (I’d have given them a horse-whipping),but if some gang of teenagers are hanging around banging on doors,chucking stones and just generally acting like yobs…well, Fuck them.

    There is too much of this allowing low-level nuisance by yobs…imagine if it had been some poor pensioner that they’d been tormenting and not a young hothead.

    • “a tad far”. Are my eyes deceiving me? When did the Dick Fiddler we all know, love and respect start using vulgar American expressions? Could it be he has been bowled over by the Duchess of Sussex? Is he a secret fan of Oprah? Has Gemma Atherstone been ousted from her podium by Serena Wiliams? What next? “Have a nice day!” instead of “Fuck off”?

      • Evening,Mr. P.

        Is “tad” an Americanism?.. Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit.. I had no idea.

        There’ll be no whisky left for the toast to Robbie Burns if you’e started nipping out of it this early Mr P.

        🙂 .

      • It absolutely is. Yes sirree. I shall certainly be celebrating Burns Night as should you Mr F, a descendant of the Stuarts as I recall. As a Jacobite I will raise my glass to the king over the water – or in Northumberland should he be there.

      • I shall indeed be raising my glass tonight (as I do most nights,if I’m honest) and rue the sad twist of fate that deprived me of my birthright.
        I did attempt to raise an army and advance on London to reclaim my rightful position…unfortunately when my forces realised that we weren’t actually going to the races they demanded that the minibus stop at The Bay Horse in Woodburn and then rather lost interest after 4 hours of “refuelling”..indeed ,some were quite abusive.. “Fuck Off,you mental old Cunt” is no way to address a Royal-in-waiting….Plebs.

      • What the world needs now is not love sweet love but the memoirs of Dick Fiddler, Thane of Northumberland, Master of the Foxhounds, Chief Boy Scout, He Who Must Be Obeyed etc yet a man with a Heart of Gold Beneath that Vincent Price Exterior. I can´t wait to read them and hope I am mentioned. Next stop – a major motion picture that goes beyond being a tad heartbreaking. I leave the cast in others´ hands although a certain Gemma might be the main female part. As for the noble Dick who could dare assume this august role?

  18. I had to Google this one, as it’s another nom I’ve never heard of. Unfortunately I’m still none the wiser as there appears to be a fuck ton of “Nicole Lyons”.
    I’ll just nod and agree that this particular version is a cunt.

  19. Watching a film on ‘talking pictures’ channel, Aleister sims and Margaret Rutherford.
    2 of my favourites!
    Shows a country thats dissapeared almost, england 1946 , god we need a reset button.

    • We should launch a false flag nuke from Iran upon London, and use it as an excuse to destroy Africa and the middle east, the world’ll thank us later.

    • Don’t mention Alistair Sim to the wokees, all that dressing up as a woman in st trinians is offensive to real trannies

  20. When she opens her front door she should get lamped by the giant boxing glove they used in Jackass.
    Filled with concrete.

  21. I think it’s a fair result. She had the balls to confront them. How many times has that gone wrong ? Many a dad stabbed to death for standing up for himself and his family. Fuck em, those ferral brats were being cunts and came up against a bigger one. I doubt they’ll even think of doing it again. I hope she gets one of those ‘Sting’ doorbells wired up to the mains.

    • Whichever way you look at it, these kids have learned an invaluable lesson, one they’ve obviously not been taught by their parents, and that is if you think it’s a good idea to aggravate people for no reason, sooner or later you’ll meet someone who’ll do something to you in return. Now they know, and maybe it will save them from something worse than a broken leg, cuts and bruises.

    • Exactly. Who said it was a bunch of cute kids playing a innocent game?
      Feral brats in sports direct attire an a hip hop attitude, well hes got hip-op now!
      Needs a headstart to get away now hes got Dunlop emblazoned on his arse.

  22. I used to be a right little cunt when I was a kid. I remember once, tying fishing twine to this looneys door knocker, and we hid across the road behind a wall. For about twenty minutes we knocked this door, and in the end we were even knocking it while he was closing it. Watching him standing on his doorstep dumbfounded was fucking hilarious, especially to a twelve year old. However, back then, if you were caught being a cunt, you would have had a right kick up the arse, or even a good hiding. And you would take it too, because if they had told your parents, the slamming you would have would have been worse. Kids being cunts now do it knowing there will be little consequence, as they are untouchable by the aggrieved, protected by the law, and the parents are shit.
    As for the bovril coloured bint, I definitely would get stuck up her.

    • I suppose I was a bit of a cunt. Knocking on doors and running away. Also taking the gate off the hinges. But out gang merged for a little while with another. And they not only did those things they started smashing the milk bottles on the windows sills and doorsteps. It wasn’t too long after we reverted to our original gang.

      • Always remember Miles id of been about 14 at the time all messing about outside a towerblock, remember them concrete drainage tunnels theyd use in70s on parks?
        Well this ‘park’ was just 4 of them, we were throwing this big chunk of wood at each other, laughing swearing etc,
        Being lads!
        One of us threw this wood right through the glass on the towerblock emergency exit! 💥
        Glass everywhere!
        As we were walking off this bloke legged it from the flats and ran at us deleivering a flying headbutt to this lad who smashed the window.
        Stuck the boot in as well,
        One of the most spectacular acts of violence ive ever seen,
        This guy was in a rage!!
        I burst out laughing in shock/nerves whatever, sent the guy truly berserk chased me all over the playing fields, no way was he doing that to me!
        But what he did was right.

  23. This fuckin’ harpy is a single mother with two children, Ginger and Knockdown, ages 1 and 3. This is no doubt the reason she escaped any prison term.
    In another 15 years time, Ginger and Knockdown will be the new thugs on the block.

    • At least your safe in the knowledge the “Beware of the parrot” sign deters such behaviour at Blunty Heights.

      • He can be quite nasty LL with people he doesn’t know.
        Kids no longer come around on Halloween and he’s been known to shit on Pikeys who come touting for business.

      • You must be on the Jehovah’s Witnesses blacklist along with Dick Fiddler. Bonus!

      • I wish they would come back to mine LL. Since the time they came and asked how deeply I could feel God they’ve never returned…I must admit that my reply did get slightly out-of hand….trying to explain,using the shank of the yardbrush and much hip-thrusting,just what a DildoCamera was to two confused old Godbotherers took some doing…I’m still not too convinced that they understood just how deep a feeling I had for God.

      • That’s the thing about JWs they knock on doors but don’t run away. They just move onto the next and the next and the next….

      • Evening, Miles.

        They really are a determined bunch. I wonder how many “converts” they actually get by cold-calling? I’d have thought that they actually more irritate than interest most people.

      • We actually used to live next door to a black JW couple and their son with their church just down the road. Very quiet and nice people but then again, you don’t shit on your own doorstep.

      • It is one of their duties they have to fulfill I think Mr F. I have known one for all my life. He has zero personality. What I mean by that he makes a terrible salesman. You don’t expect ‘patter’ but has got very little to say.after the initial ‘do you know God?’
        I know they take literally the figure from Revelation only 120, 000 will be saved. I suspect he thinks the more doors he knocks on the more of a chance he has.
        I can see him now in my mind’s eye with his black briefcase. A wasted life I just can’t help feeling.

      • I never knew about that 120,000 thousand, Miles. It’s not a lot…rather fear that there may be several billion in front of me in the queue for Salvation.

      • If I’m honest,I haven’t led the most Godly life. I suspect that I’ll get to both The Gates of Heaven and The Gates of Hell and neither’ll let me in…”Fuck Off Fiddler, you appalling Cunt..we don’t want you” they’ll shout at me through the intercom.

      • Only 120,000 cunts will be saved?

        Well, considering there are over 8 million Jehovah’s Witnesses in the world, it seems the vast majority are going to be in for a massive disappointment.

        Are they not very good at arithmetic? Or maybe they’re just heavy gamblers.

      • Take the advice of Oscar Wilde Mr F-‘ Catholicism is the only religion to die in’.

      • No,religion’s not for me….Nothing against people who chose to believe.If they get comfort out of it,good luck to them.

      • What about a huge great slap up ‘Death Bed Repentance’ Mr F like Lord Marchmain at the end of Brideshead. There you’d be failing fast and all us Is gathered round looking for a sign. Miserable at one corner of the bed, Nurse Cunty seeing to your final needs, RT wiping away his tears, even the Capt falling to his knees. ‘It is finished’.

        Next Nom.

      • You make a good point,Miles….it’s a wise man who hedges his bets.
        I wonder how many people actually do say the odd prayer to a God who they have always previously denied when The End actually looms large?…I probably will..nothing lost either way,is there?

      • Bet theres thousands.
        Nothing to focus your mind like thinking your going for good.
        Im not a religious Dick,
        But if theres a heaven im going.
        Why not? Not evil, dont rip anyone off,
        Don’t see why id get a knockback just for a foul mouth!
        But yeah your fucked!!😀

      • Or in South Park, a batch of recent arrivals in Hell were told by Satan “Sorry everyone it was the Mormons”.

  24. Back in the day if you were a cunt, you knew you were and knew the consequences of your actions. Kids nowadays think being a cunt is the norm and they are untouchable. If they are cunts they deserve to be made a cunt of.

    • If no cameras, no witnesses, well sorry but theres a thing called natural justice!
      Maybe you can google while waiting in A&E.
      Feral little bastards.

  25. Sophie Khan, human rights lawyer, wants the MET police to sack the brave officer who tasered the rasta twat who hacked him with a machette. Use of his taser was disproportionate she whines. Fuck off you pathetic Guardian reading slime cunt.

  26. Yeah actually I’ve changed my mind on this cunting after having been watching knock down ginger videos of arrogant little fuckers on youtube, was I ever that irritating? Running the cunts over sending one flying is pretty fucking funny. Shame there’s not a video.

    • Hehehe yeah Shagga no way shes done this without being pushed to far!
      Maybe they scared her little tots.
      A womans bond with her babies is a potent thing, all female animals will protect their young, if so i reckon we should pardon her an send her some flowers!

  27. Kids will be kids, this is what happens when Jimmy saville and Michael Jackson are dead, the little cunts have nothing to fear anymore, still the Catholic church still have some priests in the community, I bet the little fuckers would behave if priests were roaming the streets, cunts all of them

  29. I’m afraid that I used to be a right Cunt
    I don’t need to go into detail, but it’s enough to say that I’ve caused a lot of grief for a lot of people.
    However, I’m pleased to say that I saw the error of my ways and turned my life around.
    I can therefore proudly announce that since last Wednesday, I’ve been as good as gold.
    Get To Fuck.

    • A Man gets a job at a zoo, on his first day the head zookeeper says “It’s specialised work so we will put you on the basic stuff like feeding, cleaning etc – but whatever you do make sure none you do not harm any of the animals or you are toast”
      “OK, go and feed the fish”
      The Man goes to the aquarium, one of the fish jumps out and gives him a vicious bite, “Little b*tard” he shouts, and beats it to death.
      Desperate to cover up his actions he goes to the lion enclosure and throws the fish in.
      Next job is feeding the chimps, as he is doing so one of them bites him, “Little b*stard” he shouts, and beats the chimp to death.
      Desperate to cover up his actions he goes to the lion enclosure and throws the chimp in.
      Next job is getting the honey from the beehives, as he is doing so he gets badly stung, “little b*stards” he shouts and smashes up a beehive and pulps the bees.
      Desperate to cover up his actions he goes to the lion enclosure and throws the squashed bees in.
      The next day a new lioness arrives at the zoo – “so what’s it like here” she asks one of the lions.
      “Well, it can be boring, but the food is amazing – yesterday we had fish, chimps and mushy bees”..

  30. The trials and tribulations of life, sorry existence, on a Greater Manchester council estate.

Comments are closed.