Last Christmas (Fuckarse New Film)

Posted on by

Last Christmas…

Being in the mood for something light and Christmassy I went to see this film the other week. Now before I’m told “serves you right” or “why are you seeing a bird’s film then eh?”, I don’t mind romantic comedies if they’re done well. And don’t feature Bill “versatile” Nighy. But this one was most definitely not done well.

It was co-written by Emma “do as I say, not as I do proles” Thompson, a woman who I used to consider irritating, but now consider an irritating cunt. The lead character is a Yugoslav immigrant who we are told likes Wham!/George Michael, although this is never elaborated upon, being simply an excuse to string various hits through the soundtrack.

Every featured character is foreign, coloured, gay, disabled etc. The only straight, white, able-bodied, English male is a racist on the bus (“speak English in MY COUNTRY”). No, not making this up.

Add to this an anti-Brexit message to make Jo Swinson froth at the gash – it’s equated to Serbian genocide (really, I’m not making this up,) an Asian/West Indian couple (two groups who famously intermingle), lovable tramps taking part in a talent show (again, not making this up) and Dame Emma herself playing the mother, all malapropisms and funny singing, delivering the Serbian equivalent of an Uncle Tom performance (Uncle Tomek?)

The plot is also identical to the play, “I and You”. Not just similar, fucking identical. The bloke she starts dating is actually dead, she received his heart as a transplant. Which I’m not sure is the correct interpretation of the title song lyrics. And it wasn’t an original idea when “I and You” used it either. Oh, spoilers.

The critics seem unanimous in their disdain as well, even the fucking Guardian, whose wet dream this pile of shit is. Utter cunt of a film.

Nominated by Guardian Hater

67 thoughts on “Last Christmas (Fuckarse New Film)”

  1. This ugly old bitch is an absolute cunt of the highest order , I hope she dies in a fucking plane crash on the way to one of her Extinction Rebellion demonstrations . Obviously I would feel sorry for anyone else but if I was stuck on a plane Emma Thompson I would want the thing to crash anyway . Fucking hypocritical phoney shit stain

  3. Reading the nom alone makes ones arse twitch, puerile simplistic garbage, typical of anything associated with this woman, she fancies herself as an informed intelligent woman, it is probably best to let her run with this delusion as she undoubtedly shows herself up as a lightweight fool every time. Would love to send her a box of crackers for christmas all containing Bernard Manning jokes that would be priceless

  4. This looked like a steaming turd of a film even before I knew Emma Thompson was involved with it. With any look it’ll bomb at the Box Office, as, hopefully, will the next woke James Bond film, complete with a black female ’00 agent….’Name’s Bond, Brooke Bond…’

    • Sir, with a name such as yours Sir, I wonder if you have gone under the knife yourself in order to transition, my understanding it is becoming more and more popular

  6. Dating a dead man eh. Even covering mental illness! This is a seminal piece of wankery. Bet the production is carbon neutral as well thanks to paying little Abdul to plant some mangrove twigs (even if they are planted and grow will take a min of twenty five years to do any good that’s if Abduls kids don’t cut the fuckers down for firewood). Is there no bandwagon these publicity hungry vultures will hitch a ride on. In view of the success of the me too movement I am starting an up yours movement so people can protest about the overwhelming tide of drossy bollocks that descend on their lives every second of every day. I say to the purveyors of such knobbery fuck of and eat shit and leave me alone with the remnants of my sanity.

Comments are closed.