Kidults

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A nomination for couples in their 30s and 40s who pay to watch babies’ films at the cinema, otherwise known by the admittedly cuntish portmanteau ‘kidults’.

I’m still 10% human so dont really begrudge people watching nostalgic crap like Pinocchio or Mary Poppins at Christmas or if they feel a bit down, or take issue with the dopey dads who take their kids to see Kung Fu Panda.

It’s these twats, these professional geeks – usually a girl who speaks like a gurgling child and uses Anime characters as her avatars, and her pussy whipped boyfriend (probably entering his first long term relationship) – who insist on going the cinema as a couple to watch Pixar crap like Toy Story, or generally any animated films aimed at children.
I dont really understand the mindset of these cunts, nor did i understand why so many fucking adults – usually women and highly effeminate and feminised men – would post memes and videos about fucking ‘Frozen’.

Being a decent citizen at the time I bit my tongue, but it was a truly disturbing number of ‘friends’ and their half-wit associates. The revulsion i felt towards so many of these sad fuckers was one factor of many in quitting social media.

Fucking idiots.

Nominated by Cuntamus Prime

71 thoughts on “Kidults”

  2. Nice job CP. I’ve never understood those obsessive nerds and geeks who dress up in Star Wars or Trekkie gear, or those heavily into the Harry Potter guff either.
    Kidults indeed. Harmless enough though, I suppose.

  3. Is this that cosplay bollocks that is so popular in Japan?

    I had an ex g/f who went to one of those cosplay gigs dressed as Lara Croft. But I have known others dressing as some right cartoony cunts, and speaking in twat-speak as well.

    Which is all very well looking like a twat at an event, but when the event is over and you have to catch the train/bus back home dressed as some anime fuckwit, you do have to wonder was it all worth it!

    • I dont understand cosplay either. Nowadays you get slutty girls with no interest in these things dressing as superheroes and general gimp-wear to get the attention of the dweebs they pity.

      A professional comic book artist pointed this out in a Facebook post and the SJWs went mad, including some cuck and professional geek from the New Statesman.

      • Yes, I remember the relatively low-res for the earlier Tomb Raider PC games, and her pointy tits and blocky arse.

  4. If your wearing pumps after the age of fifteen your a cunt ,let alone any of this bollocks. Grow the fuck up. Shoulders back. Steady the buffs.

  5. Our new neighbour’s teenage daughter is in to all this UFO and alien stuff, which is quite handy really as tomorrow she’s being abducted….

    • When you mentioned UFO, I momentarily envisaged the heavy rock band of the late 70s under the leadership of one Phil Mogg, and the axe-god that is/was Michael Schenker

  6. There was a British film (movie to wankers) called “Kidulthood.”
    I seem to remember some slags sucking cock for drugs and some architects and social workers stabbing and shooting each other. I liked it but I have a feeling we’re talking about something very different here.

      • Nah….. no little slag wants to suck my cock. On the other hand no architect wants to stab me or shoot me.
        Well, not yet anyway.

  7. I feel very much the same way about anyone over 12 that watches superhero films. .
    Afternoon, cunts.

    • Many of these (adult) bellends were openly weeping when Iron Man died in the latest one (I’d say spoiler alert but I dont care cos I’m a cunt). How fucking old are you??

  8. Mind you have you seen some of the women?? Fuck me I’d dress up as Spiderman if they’d be willing to let me spray my gooey white “webs” all over them

  9. Would be great if these twats donned their finest super hero costumes went to Londonistan and emulated their heroes, a few Biffs, Splats and Kerpows and the Stabby, Moped mugger problem would be solved.

    Attention seeking cunts.

    • Honestly, It would be awesome to see a bunch of guys dress up as the Punisher and just gun down the gangsters. The streets would be a mess for several months, but it would be worth it.

  11. I love all that shite.
    Lifes hard as it is, bit of escapism is nice, few beers some Game of thrones, vikings, lord of the rings etc
    Takes mt mind off work, tax, bills, family.
    Told you before, STOP JUDGING ME!!!
    I’m a nerd, fuck you.

    • Its just a matter of treading the fine line between having fun, and taking things too seriously…. 😉

    • I imagine you as a very large Hermoine skipping over the lake district on the way to a sunday dinner with the hound of the Baskervilles.

      • Or a Viking. I could see Miserable going about his business in a bearskin cloak and a massive Thor hammer.

      • Evening LL,
        Funny you should say that, one of my customers supplied extras for the show ‘vikings’ and asked me to go too Dublin for filming,
        But I got shy!
        Wish id of done it now!😣

      • You may have some Viking blood as they didn’t really go in for the “No means no” MeToo# amid the raping and plundering. Lots of raids in the North of England, so your ancestors could have looted some Fiddler gold!

      • Yeah, “Hermiones let herself go! Shes got a massive beard!”
        Im unrepentant Smug, nowt wrong wi bit of escapism, in fact im more determined to nerd out!
        Next time my business reviews up at the bank im going as a orc!

    • Yes but I draw the line at Spider-Man. It’s just not that interesting a story and there’s two or three troupes playing it x three or four sequels. It just doesn’t fucking STOP.

      Also Star Wars…ffs it’s just idiots dressed in bed sheets in a plywood Star Trek set having looooong boring conversations about fucked if I know or care. Fuck off!

      Oh yair and: Hairy Potter…every fucking time his name is revealed to a new crowd the room goes quiet and someone says ‘ooooh we ecspecht gwreat thwings fwom you Mistah Potter”. FFS put the pressure on the poor kid. Cuntssss

  13. Deeply suspicious that some of those present actually know what this is all about. I’d never come across it, but it fits with the malignant infantilisation of society. The woman in the picture probably identifies as an economy-size plastic spaceman toy and by next year will have formed a pressure group called “Us ‘R’ Toyz” to wave banners and chant for equal rights in public spaces.
    Fucking grow up, cunts.

  14. Harry fucking Potter, Super fucking Heroes, Animated shite, Lord of the fucking ringpieces, teen shite, piss poor re-makes and fucking Romcoms.
    They don’t make films for grown ups anymore.

      • Promoted you cunt. For services to Brazilian Tube passengers and imaginary pee do file conspiracies involving VIPs.
        I now self identify as a tuppence licker, that helped as well.

  15. What if WE are fictional and what we thought was fiction is reality?

    “He is the dreamer and the dream.”
    “Write the words brother Benny!”

    • What if YOUR fictional and the rest of us are real?
      What if your a character in a book im writing?
      You dont know it, you assume your real,
      But your at the mercy of my narrative,
      And I can change the story anytime I like.
      You thought of that?
      You dizzy yet?😁

      • That reminds me… meant to nominate the new remake of the Twilight Zone, all fucking woke and right-on now

      • Didnt know theyd remade it!
        Loved Twilight Zone, some were genuinely thought provoking, some genuinely scary.
        Ill have a look, ruined it I suppose all about diversity i assume.😟

      • They have remade Ben-Hur, Miserable, saw it being advertised this weekend with Morgan Freeman in it. Never have spotted that red Mini that is supposed to be in the chariot race scene for a split second in the original.

      • Not Ben hur as well!
        I like anything with chuck Heston in it,
        Wouldn’t be same without chuck.
        Like him as moses, doesnt bother trying to be slightly middle eastern, full on yank!😉
        And great as Taylor in planet of the apes where he says to David Lammy
        “Get your filthy paws off me you damn dirty ape!!!”

      • Yep, proper woke. One episode is LITERALLY about all the men in a town turning into sex-crazed monsters and harrassing all the wimminz; almost as if they’re drawing some subtle parallel with events that might have happened in the entertainment industry or something, I dunno; too clever for the likes of me to grasp.

      • Almost as good as John Wayne when he played Genghis Khan with full-on slitty eyes and yellowface!!

      • MNC! Make the world stop spinning!

        P.s.
        Was that Dallas or Dynasty where that fella woke up and it was all a dream?

      • Dallas i think spoons.
        Lad who works for me was in the states fir a while in a band and he said american soaps are a bit like that,
        UFOs an werewolves in them, a far cry from Coronation street

  17. Years ago I took a work colleague to task, as she had been to see Finding Nemo and was going on about how good it was etc… When I pointed out that it was just a kids film, she came back with the predictable line that it wasn’t just a kids film, there was lots of adult humour in it too – fuck off, it’s a kids film and you were a cunt for seeing it. I didn’t say that though since I fancied her.

  18. I saw one once called The Princess Has Come Of Age. It was most disturbing.

  19. We have enough fucking weird twats running about our local woods as it is. If I start coming across Hobbits, Elves and such I will have to up the meds. All I want is a simple life I am still trying to figure out all this transbendery gender crap. Causes me no end of trouble if speaking to someone whom I’ve just met as I have no idea how to address them. Last thing I want is to mis gender them and be labelled a white facist, racist blah blah blah cos that would upset me loads.

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