Comediennes (2)

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I would like to dedicate a square nomination for the oft-mentioned but rarely cunted ‘comediennes’ – many of us despise them but because we are such bitter, militant sexists, we have never addressed the inequality of giving them adequate representation within these hallowed halls. Being a prime example of a subserviant gentleman and fair-minded champion of women’s rights, allow me to take the lead on this one, chaps.

Miranda Hart, Sarah Millican, that cunt from Goodness Gracious Me, Jo Brand, Amy Schumer, Victoria Coren, Julia Louis Dreyfus, any of the shitcunts from Saturday Night Live, that ginger-haired cunt who drags out her Northern accent, that obese Australian landwhale, Dawn French, Jennifer Saunders, Josie Long, Bernard Toksvig, Jenny Eclair, Catherine Tate and any of those fucking cunts from that whole Peep Show/Thick Of It incestuous Oxbridge TV clique… not one single fucking laugh has ever been brought out in me by any of them.

I can truly count the number of women in comedy or stand up who have made me laugh on a pair of testicles: Felicity Montagu from Alan Partridge and Pauline McLynn from Father Ted. Both had/have actual comedic timing, delivery, nuances.

The rest are just – especially these days – ultra-feminist useless cunts whose source material is 99% about their own vaginas, periods, victimhood and problems having sex with their cavernous klunges.

Absolutely fucking useless cunts. Marzipan dildos, the lot of them.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

122 thoughts on “Comediennes (2)”

  1. Harking back somewhat, Mary Tyler Moore and Valerie Harper starred in some well written shows without having to refer to their bits and bobs, what about Jennifer Aniston phwooooaar as far as I am aware not jumped onto the feminist bandwagon

    • The marvellous Christopher Hitchens once did a piece about women not being naturally funny. It’s not in their nature; they don’t need to be humourous, he argued. It’s on yoochoob somewhere.

  4. One of the best noms in ages, TECB. Julia Louis Dreyfus in Seinfeld may not have been very funny – except in the famous dance scene – but my goodness she was hot. (Check out Rolling Stone cover and inside pic.)

    Estelle Harris, who played George Constanza´s mother in Seinfeld as a shrill old bag with a frizzy red wig, is one of the best of the old style comediennes. The episode when she claimed Kramer had made a pass at her while giving her a lift in his car with the ASSMAN licence plate is hilarious. Check it out.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfBaDWVIK7E

  5. Airmiles Andy (A song, a dance and a pee dough friend) is funnier than the lot of them. My first out-loud laugh at something on Radio 4 for some weeks was hearing that HRH had remained chums with Epstein after the man was convicted because, in his opinion, he (HRH) was “too honourable”. More details at 2100, i believe, on an idiot box near you.

    • Its the way he tells em Komodo!
      Funny guy, underwear inspector,
      Man of honour.

      I saw that too, 14yr old girls bedroom at 3am?…sleepwalker.

      Ascot school for young ladies dormitory installing cameras?..ghosthunting.

      • I laughed at Andy’s Brian-Rix farce act. “Honourable” and Fergie-shagger Andy in the same sentence is the ultimate oxymoron.

      • He doesn’t watch Tv but always has a tv times open with programs circled in marker pen next to his armchair? 😁

      • Slanderous (expletives). It was on R4 news with, as always, plentiful reference to the TV programme it was clipped from. But I know some of us have not yet relinquished the idiot lantern, and you won’t have to wait for the choicer snippets online later. But I will, unless the news at 10 contains more tidbits.

        Well, OK, I don’t deny “sinister”. TY, MNC.

      • Hehe! You well K?
        I didnt say sinister that was Rtc,
        They had a interview with Hrh Andy and was clearly damage limitation from those higher up, it gets any worse for Andy he will fail a driving lesson in a french underpass.

      • Old Grand Lizard Master, Big Phil has his wrinkled old claw hovering over MI6 on speed dial.

      • Yeah LL, phil -“unfortunately the kids gotta go, hes becoming a liability, make it quick and believable …

        Allegedly

      • Don’t think I’ve ever seen a cunt as shifty as Andrew was in that interview. He couldn’t have cüm over more guilty if he’d tried.

        Me thinks Komodo doth protesteth too much. No-one in their right mind would knowingly expose themselves to the establishment drivel oozing out of Radio4.

        I reckon he has a large bank of TVs which he sits mesmerised by 24/7.

      • And Andy is only descended from Brenda…
        Phil won’t have any worries about terminating the nasty little cunt.

    • (Later)
      Christ, it’s even worse than I thought. He says he went to Pizza Express in Woking!

      Is there any way of impeaching the cunt?

      • I get the impression that for you, pretty well everything is a complete irrelevance, RTC. The outcome of a public-school education, perhaps. But if HRH is irrelevant, what are we poor mortals? I do not see you on the barricades…

      • What now K… the politics of envy? Typical Corbynista. Get back to Colchester Zoo.

  7. Tracy Ulman.
    Cannot watch any detective series after her “Dead Face” sketch or her Angela Merkal skits without thinking of her taking the piss.

  8. “Titter ye not” as Frankie Howard would say. Listened to R4’s The Now Show on Friday (I was driving). Not one chortle did it raise. R4 content is increasingly crap these days.

    But if we all wrote to the BBC with our views, some millenial cunt executive will tell us that “market research” shows this is what audiences want. Millenials are to blame as always. Cunts.

  9. This lady made me laugh:

    https://youtu.be/YN3uUnoL5K0

    Part of a new comedy movement called “Comedy Unleashed”:

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCErEMQf4SmG0wzGV2gxg7jw

    They still have their Brexit/Trump/BoJo digs but they also have digs at the other side too (groomy cunts, flakes and feminazis).

    The former is required to be considered a “comedian” within the lamestream media groups, the latter will have you doxed and taken off the “echo chamber” comedy club phone list when work is about.

    So these fuckers set up their own gig and actually produce material that is funny.

    No “safe spaces” or the right to “not be offended Man!” just piss-take comedy at it’s finest, where all sides take a kicking, which is exactly how it should be!

    This bloke’s set is hilarious. He’s a “crafty butcher” but he takes as much piss out of the alphabet people as anyone.

    https://youtu.be/v2U74s0-GaQ

    I’m glad I found this channel. A million times better that the drivel we’re force-fed by the AL-BBC, ITV(agina) and C(unt)4!

    • Yuss these Beeb comedienne lesbos are a cringe. This Susan Calman Sweaty is on’t radio as I type,Jeez another pig ugly unfunny fucker. These Cunts must think that life is all gravy from here on in what with getting their feet under the BBC table. It’s like a closed shop of the blessed ones at the BEEB, a clique of unfunny,ugly cunts that can just FUCK OFF.

  10. Sorry cunters.

    I posted in here yesterday with a few links to a new wave of non-PC comics.

    Alas as the moderation AI is harsher than SkyNet, you’ll just have to remain miserable.

  11. Oh man, have we missed out Sue & Mel otherwise known as Smell & Puke – wht is it that these two utterly talentless cretins have that keeps them on nearly every other tv show on the box?? truly horrible cunting please

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