Yes, you thought there were some things the modern world couldn’t intrude on……there are some things the snowflakes can’t touch. Think again my friends. Now we have Christmas trees for our bent community.
They’re not real, of course, but is anything real these days? Yes, artificial trees decked out in the rainbow colours. Available from Amazon at £196 a pop. You should get one…….they’ll last for years and you don’t want the ‘Thought Police’ kicking your back door in (oooh, cheeky) on Christmas Day do you?
Jesus Christ! He was gay as well you know? Seriously. Fucking fact.
Nominated by Freddie the Frog
I wonder what the carbon footprint of these plastic things is. Oh sorry, I forgot. That’s only for the little people.
18
Warning unhinged rant approaching.
I fucking hate the Establishment. I made the mistake of watching the ‘debate’ on Boris Johnson’s deal with the EU. There are so many fucking smug lawyers in the Commons it is unbelievable. “My learned friend” – fuck off with that shit. Know how to wire a plug, fit a hot water system or even dig a ditch? Fuck off cunts.
I had to turn off when that utter shitstain Starmer started talking bollocks. An affected upper class voice spewing out lie after lie – no-one gives a fuck that your father was a tool maker – you are still a shill for the ruling class. And you are a fucking liar.
But worse of all is that red faced, smirking cunt Letwin…
https://mikesplace2017.wordpress.com/2019/10/20/oliver-letwin-man-of-the-people/
Words cannot express the viciousness of my contempt for these people. I look forward to the tumbrills in Trafalgar Square.
Anyone with a heart condition should avoid today’s Sunday Times. I nearly had an aneurysm when I saw the front page on my iPad earlier.
I feel better now. Thank you for listening.
35
I knew someone wouldn’t be able to hold fire until the next brexit related cunting. I’m having to bite my tongue.
Never fear the Letwin cunting commeth, don’t fire until you see the browns of their nostrils.
12
What? Sorry CMC i was dressing the tree!
(In leather kilt an string vest)
7
Heard a good joke recently.
Florist goes into a barber’s. Gets a haircut and says, “Thanks mate. How much?” The barber replies, “It’s on the house pal. I’m just doing a good deed for the community.” The florist is surprised but happy. The next morning, the barber looks out of his front door and sees a thank you card and a large bouquet of flowers on his step.
Later that day, a baker is getting a haircut at the same barbershop. The barber completes the haircut. The baker says, “That’s fine, thanks. How much do I owe you?” The barber says, “Nothing today mate. I’m doing a good deed for the community.” The baker is surprised but happy. The next morning, the barber opens his front door and sees a thank you card and a large hamper filled with cakes and pastries.
Later that afternoon, an MP is getting a haircut. The barber completes the cut and the MP asks, “How much, my good man?” The kind barber says, “Nothing at all, Sir. I’m just doing a good deed for my community.” The MP is surprised but happy. The next morning the barber opens his front door to see 400 MPs queuing up outside.
19
I suspect big business are jumping on the LGBTSHIT bandwagon, in much the same way Hollywood is doing with rebooting some fairly recent blockbusting classics in order to satisfy new markets (wimminz, poofters, lezzers, effnicks etc)
Of course Big Business won’t fuck about with any other religious following other than the soft-as-shite Christian one. For example, imagine a gay version of the Koran on Amazon – never going to happen!
Am surprised the LGBTSHIT community haven’t already declared that Jesus was a trannie, Mary was a lezzer, and Joseph something in-between.
Come the next decade expect some aspects of our history to be totally revised & reinterpreted for the SJW/VS generation.
Merry fucking Christmas!
21
“Come the next decade expect some aspects of our history to be totally revised & reinterpreted for the SJW/VS generation…”
SOME? Absolutely everything’s up for grabs Techno and has been since the late 50’s. There is not one aspect of received history, convention or culture that is to be excluded from Marxist cultural revisionism, repositioning, ‘reinterpretation’ and wholesale media driven, policy backed, legally enforced degeneracy and open ridicule. Not one!
3
If they have one in Parliament the burning question is, who will they choose as the fairy on top?. They are spoilt for choice given all the old poofters and closet queens they have in there pissing us off.
14
In the terms of all inclusivity I motion every MP has one inserted violently in to their rectums and as a special treat for Bercow make sure it is decked out with lights, tinsel and all the traditional accoutrements
15
I was about to use that line.
Homophobe!
9
Unfortunately not a surprise that Christmas is being hijacked under the pretence of being ‘inclusive’, Father Christmas will be in stripper heels and glittery assless chaps by next year.
This follows Kellogg’s launching a special LGBT cereal called All Together as a “symbol of acceptance” celebrating Spirit Day (eh?) in the USA. I have had my suspicions about Snap, Crackle and Pop since childhood. Dick Fiddler has probably covered this in his thesis on ‘The Gayness’ and its sinister breakfast time indoctrination.
12
Oh ducky darling! Tree looks fab!
Look at it glitter!
Not having on of them in December.
7
They can all deck their balls with boughs of holly for all I fuckin’ care, the load of pricks.Right big man, after me.
🎶. Tis the season to be jolly
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la
Don we now our gay apparel
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la
Troll the ancient Yule-tide carol. 🎶
6
Father Christmas is now a black, one legged lezza known as ‘Winterfest Person’. Get with the times LL!
6
A Gay goes to buy a Christmas tree and the man selling it says ” That’s a lovely tree but very large,are you going to put it up yourself?..
“Don’t be disgusting” says The Gay “I’m going to put it in the living-room”
LOL, LOL.
Fuck Off.
28
A Gay goes to buy a Christmas tree and the man selling it says ” That’s a lovely tree but very large,are you going to put it up yourself?.
“Yes,I am” says The Gay ” but my boyfriend is going to help me ram it up my tattered shite-trumpet along with several gerbils and a dildo the size of Mike Tyson’s forearm”
LOL LOL.
Fuck Off.
11
So good you had to say it twice…
That really did muster a good Sunday morning chortle whilst I’m laying cable. I actually don’t think the thing is unattractive, but at £200 a pop. just goes to show that foolish pooves and their money are easily just as parted as regular fools.
7
Just wish I had come up with the idea first and contacted the invariably Chinese sweatshop that churns them out and sold em in SW London for double that.
4
would the post coitus experience with the tree involve licking out the pine needles out of the rather sore bumhole, a job for Rudolph the red nosed reindeer perhaps
3
As kids, my sis and I used to laugh ourselves silly over an ad in the Radio Times…
“Put a Colt Cowl up yourself.”
We put one up the corgi instead; sounded like anti-aircraft every team it dropped a beast.
1
I do not celebrate Christmas. Let us remember, Jesus was one of my tribe before he started up his own franchise.
Did you hear about the Jewish Santa Claus? “Hey kids, do you want to buy some toys?”
17
Went to a Jew that had fallen down the stairs. Wallpaper was being stripped. Asked him if he was decorating.
‘No, my boy, we’re moving’.
I’ll get my coat…
16
Over on Slipped Disc, Norman Lebrecht has asked the question “Do Jews have a problem with football ?”
To cut a long story short, the rabbi who went to the football match decided that it would be better if each team had their own ball, so they wouldn’t have to fight over it.
I love the optimism.
I think two footballs on a pitch would cause today’s effete, snowflake, pampered big girls’ blouses to have multiple nervous breakdowns.
4
This rainbow shit has just gone too far now. What next? The new Kia Sportage in special gay rainbow livery (a factory option), a rainbow sofa bed from DFS? How about an Apple, special edition rainbow iPad?
The list is endless and my only surprise is that manufacturers haven’t jumped in earlier with this stunt to cynically shift extra units of toot under the guise of inclusivity and open-mindedness.
They can all go and piss off.
13
Free ring hahahahaha
3
I read in a local free newspaper, that the local branch of LGBTblah are trying to get the word “fairy” banned, as they deem it offensive/homophobic and highly inappropriate.
Fairy lights, fairy cakes, fairies (dolls) etc. etc. could all be banned by this time next year.
8
Don’t these cunts realise that harping on about shit like that puts their cause back? The attention seeking cunts. My gay crewmates (a few, not all are gay!) despair at shit like that.
11
🎵We want you! We want you!
We want you, for the emergency crew!🎵 🚑
9
We need the rainbow-striped ambulance used for Pride to have a siren that goes ‘Yoo hoo, yoo hoo…’ and pink-flashing lights!!🤣
11
Sugar Puffs, and Puff the Magic Dragon, will be next on their shitlist, no doubt!
6
Fairy nuff.
10
What is it about these cunts misappropriating the English language?
They’ve already stolen ‘gay’ and now they’re after ‘fairy’. ‘Gay’ was a word often used in English literature by Shakespeare, Wordsworth, Milton and others(Miles will inform me of more.)
The fight is on to take back the word ‘gay’ as the following article explains.
https://www.newsweek.com/please-return-word-gay-205916
4
Yeats uses the word Bertie in his mediative poem ‘Lapis Lazuli’ about the cycles in world history:
‘All things fall and are built again. And those that build them again are gay.’
5
Only a matter of time till the fags get ‘mince’ banned for being an effeminate adjective for ‘fudge packers’, no longer will we have ‘minced beef’ it will become ‘ground beef’ and ‘mince pies’ at Christmas will become ‘non-binary’ pies.
FUCK OFF
4
In ‘I wandered lonely as a cloud’ as well Bertie;
‘A poet could not but be gay’.
2
All these cunts Miles, need rounding up and deporting to Bumholia.
2
Naw they can keep it, its all dirty now.
2
They can keep it,
Its all dirty now.
1
Krav will probably tell me i’m too late but has anyone thought up rainbow 🌈 butt plugs yet?
9
… along with rainbow dildos and vibrators (must keep the lezzers happy)
9
The only thing missing from this tree is a fairy on the top.
Owen Jones perhaps ?
Morning all.
9
Given his exhaulted position my vote goes to Adonis – the first bald fairy.
6
Perhaps it’s one of those Chinese trees that goes well with the Chinese exploding fairy lights that furiously combust when someone on the other side of the road lights a fag?
Then burns the fucking house down.
Safety first you cunts.
7
These shitstabbing moaning cunts will try and spoil anything wont they?
Imagine how orrible their version of a perfect world would be?
Wed be watching from concentration camps I know that much!
Guards might be in rubber underpants and leather cap with chains on, but a concentration camp non the less.
12
I suppose the Nativity story will soon get a BLT+ makeover …….
Three Queens From The East . Bearing gifts of gerbils ,KY jelly and mincing pies.
Peaceful shepherds , fucking their flocks by night.
A transsexual Archangel, pouting like Larry Grayson and saying ‘ Look at the muck in ‘ere ‘.
All to a soundtrack by Elton Hercules John ( real name Reginald Kenneth Dwight ).
He’ll bum you all !!
Get To Fuck
10
Someone should remind them that a Christmas Carol is a joyful song before they come up with their own ideas. I don’t want some fucking trannie knocking on my door.
What will the neighbours think?
5
Our local primary school have decided that as the nativity is basically the story of a baby, an unwed mother, some hangers on and a bloke who isn’t the father, they are going to re-enact an episode of the Jeremy Kyle show instead….
11
Are they going to have the Angel Gabriel smoking a spliff and knocking back a can of Special Brew?
8
Christmas should be re-named as it has lost all its fucking meaning. Call it something else and leave the real celebration to the rest of us. A local shop selling shit for WAGS had a “Christmas event” on Thursday this week – the 17th of cunting October: over 2 months before Christmas. What for fuck’s sake? So we can beat the rush and by more than one tree. This country truly has lost its way: no moral guidance, do what you fucking like, and look at those cunts in the “seat of democracy”. I would emigrate, but where to? And being a middle-aged, white, hetero bloke, who knows about engineering, who wants me?
6
“Christmas should be re-named as it has lost all its fucking meaning.”
It was renamed; it used to be called Yule and actually did have real world meaning in marking the Winter solstice and the turn of the year.
1
I’m ”dreaming of a white christmas”, fat chance in this country
5
I reckon it really is only a matter of time before anything that is naturally white is deemed racist and unacceptable. Perhaps we can use that to our advantage and tell all blacks that unless their come changes to a natural black colour they will be neutered.
5
“I’m Dreaming of a White Christmas” is commonly played around the winter holidays every year. Just like snowmen, snow angels and even snow itself, it has racist undertones that are all too commonly overused and overlooked.
Simply put, the song is racist because it is glorifying a “white” Christmas over, say, a Christmas of colour. Implying that something is only good or worth dreaming about if it’s white assumes a kind of racial supremacy, which is clearly problematical.
This song is Hate Speech, plain and simple. Anyone singing it is guilty full stop. Any shop, supermarket, restaurant or coffee shop playing this song on their speakers are promoting racial intolerance. The song has nothing to do with snow on trees but everything to do with glorifying white supremacy, the KKK and lynchings.
Singing this song – or any other Christmas song for the matter – is hateful and theocratic. To celebrate a Christian holiday in such a manner means that you would prefer us to live in a dystopian capitalistic world without socialism.
This is not what BAME LGBTQXYZ Britain is about!
6
Right on, bro!
(raises clenched fist)
3
Almost £200 for a multi-coloured fucking eyesore ? Just to appease the he/she’s – yeah right, I’ll take two…
6
When I was a lad, homosexuality was illegal. Now it’s almost obligatory. It’s been creeping up on us bit by bit since the sixties. Years ago the Government introduced their austerity programme and asked us to bend over and take it. We’ve accepted it for so long, we’ve become like a nation of compliant poofs. If we’re not prepared to do anything about the self-serving control freaks who rule our lives, we may as well throw in the towel and stock up on lubricating cream.
7
”throwing in the towel” I assume that is onto the bathroom floor, or by chance another sexual depravity indulged in by bum bandits
3
Throwing in the Towel sounds suspiciously rugby.
Am sure Lord Fiddler would be happy to comment…
2
You’ve actually just reminded me of a happy childhood memory….after rugby practise we used to soak out towels.spin them round by a corner to make a “rat’s tail” and then whip them at the weedy kids…it was hilarious.
How’s it going, HBH?
4
After a large bowl of salted porage, it’s all hangin good, m’Lord !
Good morning to you.
2
My new bird said I could fuck her arsehole providing I get some KY Jelly, so I went to Superdrug.
The women serving said “I’m afraid we’ve run out, maybe you could try Boots.”
I said “I want to slide in, not march in”….
8
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z3pHvH8sPT4
Even the most evil monsters in the universe have come over all limp plunger. What’s the world coming to? This wouldn’t ‘ave ‘appened in mah day etc
2
I can buy a fake tree online and 4 cans of spray paint all for under £50. I don’t live that far from Brighton, maybe I can sell them a few down there and be quids in.
4
Sounds as though you’ve spotted a hole in the market Cunto!
3
True, but are they bio-dynamic and ethically sourced?
Ass bandits need to know they have spent more than they need to to justify their Twitter & Instagram posts
#LGBT #MINCE #SAUSAGEJOCKEY #FUDGEPACKING #AIDS #BRIGHTON #BBC #SHITTYCOCK
4
What about starting a protest group to prevent the abuse of christmas trees !! come on you green’s show your true colours
3
What the flying fork is going on?! Christmas trees already? It’s october.
2
I hate Christmas trees to begin with, getting them from the garage, standing it up, decorating the fucking thing for a hour. If my mom asks me to put up the tree this year like last year quite frankly shes shit out of luck cause I can’t be bothered too.
Despite the religious connotations of Christmas did you know theres a verse in the bible that says you shouldn’t adorn trees? I mean how the fook did people miss that verse in the bible? Christ is gonna be pissed if he ever comes back to see all these trees decorated and people are praising a big fat man in a big red large overcoat with his name curiously close to satans… Just saying
6
Morning TitS (or whatever time it is in Canada).
16th Century Germany is credited with starting the Christmas tree tradition as we now know it, when devout Christians brought trees into their homes to decorate.
It is believed that Martin Luther himself first added lighted candles to a tree. Walking home one winter evening, composing a sermon, he was apparently awed by the brilliance of stars twinkling amidst evergreens.
To recapture the scene for his family, he erected a tree in the main room and wired its branches with lighted candles.
They must have had some great mushrooms growing in the surrounding area! 😂
3
Its early morning here ruff tuff but you are 4 hours ahead of me, it 6:06 am now decorating trees was a roman (winter solstice), celtic, and pagan tradition too before Luther tho but interesting informations about luther remember hearing he was the first christian to do it before the pagans cheers m8 and good morning to you
2
6 hours ahead of me i meant
2
Got you – have a nice day y’hear!
2
I will and praise satan!.. I mean santa , uh I mean Christ uh wait nevermind your a theist or atheist right?
2
Atheist… with a vague belief in reincarnation.
I don’t deny the existence of forces beyond our understanding, but have no interest in religion. Especially organised religion. Except from a psychological /sociological point of view.
3
Why the fuck is this gay flag on everything these days, do they really need to advertise, isn’t there enough arse bandits as it is, we don’t need even more faggots surely, Lloyds bank now have a gay horse logo[ they are infamous cunts I know] and even Cardiff ambulances are covered in the gay rainbow, its everywhere you look, a bit more tolerance is fine but now its being rammed down our throats so to speak, as far as I m concerned the best thing for the gays was to keep it themselves, the lower the profile for the butt fucking cunts the better.
7
I’ll be decorating my tree with pink and yellow tinsel, in solidarity with old people who eat Battenberg and vote UKIP.
0
Pink and yellow? Magenta and gold (ducky)!
1