2019 World Athletics Championships

Nomination please for the 2019 World Athletics Championships in Doha.

Sport is of course a vice of mine, and I appreciate not everyone shares the sentiment. But this event encompasses so many cunts from so many elite tier corps, that it is an unmissable opportunity to gather said parties for a mass, machine-gun cunting.

i) First and foremost, the over-priced dust bowl that is Doha. With rich petrol-barons sheiking their over-inflated wallets to bribe the IAAF into awarding them these games, we have seen nothing short of a farce. Zero crowds, marathons on 40ºC heat and 70% humidity, and a sterile, soulless light show that makes even armchair sports wankers like me switch off.

ii) IAAF, for being a corrupt body of cunts, happy to sell out their athletes just for some of that lovely oil money. Oh, and also for dumping in ‘mixed relays’ at the last minute, just for those extra woke points of cuntliness.

iii) Sebastian Coe – a man so imbibed with the most potent of all cuntitudes, that merely typing this self-important behemoth of cunt’s name causes an acidic aftertaste in the fucking mouth. This cunt of course presided over the corrupt bid for this joke of a championships, and has demonstrated time and time again – just as he did with his orchestrated deification at the London Olympics – what an epitome of all-time cunt he has become.

iv) The BBC. Now did you seriously think that the BBC would turn up to this shitfest and really let so many others steal their cunt-thunder? Not a fucking chance. Coverage which sees 90% pointless, cringeworthy chat between arch-cunts like Gabby Logan and Colin Jackson; over-repetition on any nameless, British also-ran performance, at the expense of actually opvering the sporting action in real time; wistfully reminiscing over Caster Semen-ya; pretending that Mo Farah isn’t a cunt and worst of all, the unforgivable crime of giving Steve Cram gainful employment.

What an absolute festival of cunts. Roll on this Sunday when it is all over.

Nominated by The Empire Cunts Back

56 thoughts on “2019 World Athletics Championships

  1. If I wanted to see a bunch of drugged up Dark Keys running like fuck away from a white man with a pistol. I’d watch one of those hilarious American police-cam inquest shows…although,I must admit I’ve yet to see one as good as “Rodney King gets Uppity” and he didn’t even get shot.

    Did an Um’Bongo win the spear-chucking?

    • I have reconsidered what you said about dark keys and water Mr F. I was watching the steeplechase event and the dark key atheles I noticed put every effort into ‘clearing’ the water. Whereas Whitey splashed happily in and out. There maybe something in your position.

      • I recently discovered another fact about them, Miles,apparently they don’t know how to change the wheel on a car. I was walking back to my jeep in the otherwise deserted forestry car-park after an afternoon’s fishing when I encountered a coloured lady,her young child and an ancient old biddy staring at a flat tyre on their (probably stolen) car, The younger woman told me that she couldn’t get a mobile signal to ring for help and didn’t know how to change the wheel herself. Being a Gentleman, I explained the whole operation to her before getting in my vehicle and driving off. I hope she understood my instructions,it’s a 3 mile walk to the main road if she didn’t and it was absolutely pissing down.

      • Very public spirited of you Mr Fiddler. I think you’re onto something there-they don’t like basic mechanical things. See this links in with the athletics arena as well (if youll excuse the pun). They are not overly-represented in the field events like the javelin (which is surprising because it is like a spear) shot put, discus. All those throwing events are dominated by Eastern Europeans. But the dark key excels at events where they are not encumbered by ‘apparatus’ as it were. They like to run and jump free from any extraneous encmberance. Bob Beamon comes to mind. He held the long jump record for over thirty years. Now where did this ability of his come from? His ancestors of course (with their fear of water) running and jumping over rivers and streams back in Africa. They don’t like water. They do not like it.

  2. The marathons are always the same. Big group sets of, gets whittled down to about 4 black blokes you’ve never heard of, same in the women’s. The only difference in Doha was that they started at midnight yes midnight !

    • Black people can run faster because the fucking rag heads have been enslaving them for at least 2000 years.

      • It’s because they can get more oxygen into their system- bigger nostrils, don’t you know…..

  3. Like Uk to be represented in all things including sports events, but even my rabid patriotism has a red line, and its watching this fuckin snooze fest!
    Only way id watch this boring shite was if it was x-stinky rebellion protesters forced to compete while greatest band ever Zeppelins ‘friends” plays as soundtrack.

  4. I’m sure the BBC are in love with some bint called Asher-Smith! Even when she takes a dumb the cunts at the BBC think its some kind of amazing event that we should all know about!

    • I enjoyed watching the athletics coverage as I always do.
      Completely agree about the organising bodies corruption & the stupid locations sometimes allocated.

      I usually record the coverage & start watching an hour in. Thats way I can fast forward the repetitive fawning over GB’s entries “a fabulous effort & her PB but she’s 12th out of 14”

      I can also skip through Paula fucking Radcliffe & avoid that Mop headed irritating twat ‘Radzi’ who seems to get included in everything these days, despite being a talentless Cunt.

      I also get to pause over some of the female athletes who are fucking hot ,not forgetting Gabby Logan – I’d walk over broken glass to get a whiff of that.

  5. Sebastion Coe has now reached Megacunt proportions. To make himself look (even) more important he has taken to wearing thick framed glasses – and he wears the fucking things perched on the end of his nose like at 1930s high court judge.

    • well, that figures – Supreme Court judges are also senile old cunts. Maybe the glasses are a badge of office for a senile old cunt.

    • He was a cunt 40 years ago when avoiding superior runner Steve Ovett like the plague and is an even bigger cunt now.

  6. Whats interesting about running and jumping a fucking millisecond or millimetre better than the last cunt could do it.

  7. Has British athletics been taken over by the toffs? Seems to be a lot of double barrel names competing.

    • A lot of dark keys seem to have double barrel names – I suppose they use both ma and pa’s names,and it makes them sound that bit more upmarket or even “cool”

      • Amazeballs!
        Double barrel dark keys!

        Dark keys are always better at end of a double barrel.

    • I think quite a lot of them are our ethnic friends, there is a few in football too surprisingly. It must be a cultural tradition in da comoonitee of remembering their fathers name before he inevitably fucks off.

  8. I’m not an armchair sports fan (apart from Arsenal) but I don’t mind watching some international events like test cricket, Flushing Meadows, as long as it’s well organised and has atmosphere. Seeing black cunts run around a fucking empty stadium is an unbelievable bore fest. Fuck knows how much the BBC paid for it, and all the presenter cunts bound to be put up in 5 star hotels.
    And what about team GB’s performance. You couldn’t even call them also-rans because the cunts couldn’t run. Laura Muir ecstatic at coming fifth ffs. .

    • There’s more to that C&R. Laura has been injured all summer and seldom trained yet still recorded I think almost if not actually a personal best. She has as good as accused the winner of being a drugs cheat so good on her.

      But leaving aside this relatively minor detail I want to congratulate Empire for a faultless cunting of many of the usual ISAC targets all assembled in one place. I was pretty cheesed off to see Only Connect and Uni Challenge bumped for this shitfest last week but ended up watching some instead despite myself as the Russian female high jumper was well worth the effort! No moustache or hairy armpits on view there!!!

      Then came the Salazar story. To read that Coe, Radcliffe and Cram have all recently or are still in the Nike payroll is all too predictable.

      I look forward to the FIFA (TM) World Cup similarly being played out in deserted atmosphere free stadiums.

  9. what makes me laugh is that the woman that won the wimmin’s fifteen hundred, a supremely skinny legged dutcher was being suspected/accused of being a bit dodgy because she was associated with that salazar coach geezer but if anyone ever dares mention Mo Fucking Farah is dodgy because he used to be coached by him it’s alll ‘oh no, not our mo’ – just because he’s nominally ‘british’

    Fucking hypocrital cunts

  10. This event is as uplifting as skidding on a large dog turd on your way home from the pub, and dropping your steak pudding, chips, peas and gravy all over the pavement.
    Corrupt as fuck.
    Good evening.

  11. I saw Lord Coe once waiting outside the Tube on a Chelsea European night. Presumably he was waiting for his bumchum to turn up with his free ticket. He looks much older in real life, they must cake his boat with make up when he’s on the telly. Fucking poof.
    He is as corrupt as fuck. He’s a member of The Lords for fucks sake. What more evidence do you need?

  12. Superb cunting Empire

    What I’d like to know is does anyone have Gabby Yorath or
    Whatever she calls herself these days, in the Deadpool?

    Looks like Stage 4 to me.

    Another establishment cunt talking to acceptable Dark Key establishment cunts.

    Fuck the lot of them

    • Is that the same Gabby Logan nee Yorath who was born in fucking Leeds but claims to be Welsh? Father Terry Yorath Ex Leeds United /drink driver who should have gone to prison for nearly killing someone while 3 times over the drink drive limit first class CUNTS.

  13. may I remind you all any reference to mo farah should respect his true status namely Sir mo farah, tells you all you need to know about this country’s present value system every man who waded ashore on D Day deserved a knighthood not this bony assed cunt, think it might be only a matter of time before he gets rumbled with his dodgy training regime, worth tuning into the BBC when that happens

    • Having a knighthood is the true mark of a cunt. With a few honourable exceptions.

      Why do you think Sir Nigel has not been so honoured? Because he’s not a cunt.

      And Blair knows a knighthood is the clear mark of a cunt. Which is why he has resisted accepting one all these years.

      • B Liar would flog his wife and kids for a handle.
        I don’t see a queue forming, though…

      • Think he knows HM would be unable to resist skewering him during the dubbing ceremony. Last seen in Jeddah on Sunday having a friendly chat with the Saudi state-sponsored Muslim World League re tolerance. They’re Wahhabis and more than suspected of channelling funds to AQ…

  14. Always prefered Steve Ovett over Coe anyway he comes across as a complete cunt who thinks some desert hellhole is a good place to run unlike Michael Johnson and pretty much everyone else thinks it was a fucking load of shite. Well Michael actually said Coe was full of shit to be fair.

  15. The Romanians took Silver and bronze. They’d have taken the gold too, but ran off when the alarm went off….

  16. Do we have athletes? Whenever I see it we seem to have representation from the former colonies.

  17. The only saving grace to the entire shit fest was the fact that Claire beaver basher balding wasn’t there. Which means she’s being kept back for something else

  18. A few years ago I went on a stadium tour of the Stadium of Shite, Sunderland. ( don’t ask , it’s a fucking long story and I can’t be arsed )
    Anyway, they were showing us around the executive boxes where all the rich cunts go and piss it up. They had the names of the companies who owned them on the doors. So we came to one door and , in big gold letters , it said Steve Cram.
    Cunt! How can he afford that? How much are the cunting BBC paying him to talk bollocks ? Bastards.

  19. Heidi Allen races across the line to join the LibDems.

    My sincere congratulations to Heidi for crossing the line, crossing the house and beating her previous personal best in cuntishness.

    • The fucking traitor anti democratic fascist whore is where she should have been in the first place. The Tory Party is full of cunts who don’t want to be Tories. They need to ask themselves what they actually believe in…….other than filling their greedy pockets.

  20. Orange Man is cracking up…

    Trust me, I’m a Doctor of Psychotic Enlightenment.

  21. Rule number one. Never put a championship of a spectator sport in a country where alcohol is not available for the spectator.

    Rule number two. Never put any sport requiring exertion in a hot desert climate.

    Rule number three. Never pander to corrupt money.

    After all, the IAAF should have followed the honest approach and overall integrity practiced by FIFA.

    Oh, wait a minute……

    • Rule no. 4 ……always say you are holding these tournaments in a shithole cuntry because “we need to spread the sport around the world.”

      Rule no. 5…….cash only, big brown envelopes please.

  22. Am surprised our British athletes are allowed to wear the union flag colours, or indeed wave the flag when they come first – surely that must be very offensive/racist?

    Moreover, how many of these athletes voted Remain, and if so shouldn’t they be waving the EU flag instead? Oh, of course not, it was British funding/training/facilities that made them winners – but that doesn’t count does it!

  23. Strangely BBCistan doesn’t see the irony in flying a vast army of cunts to the desert to cover this corrupt shitfest.
    CO2 emissions meltdown? Climate emergency?
    Only when it suites.
    What a load of bullshitters.
    And never mind the dark keys.
    Fuck off.

  24. The mixed relays didn’t work out for The Left in the way that they thought they would because the Poles decided to run their team in a different order to everyone else. This meant that the American male on the anchor leg came blasting past the Polish female at such a rate of knots down the back straight that it truly highlighted how unequal things are. Bet they didn’t want to show that really.

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