As Elvis might have said, ‘Lawd have mur-see!’. Pantomime dame Elton Bogg is giving it large again.
This time Dame Elton’s thrown a hissy fit regarding the jet-setting of the Duke and Duchess of Hewitt, who’ve been accused of hypocrisy for taking four gas-guzzling private jet trips in eleven days, whilst preaching about climate change.
The latest jaunt of ‘Heir Miles Harry’ and Megan Sparkle took them to Dame Elton’s pad in France, a journey which, as critics have indicated, could have been made on a commercial flight, or even by train, either of which would have generated a much smaller ‘carbon footprint’. Criticism has prompted the bewigged gobshite to tell us to leave the flying royals alone. Apparently Dame Elton laid out for the hire of the jet, and paid to offset the carbon footprint generated. That’s alright then. ‘Diana, Princess of Wales was one of my dearest friends’, gushes the pompous luvvy prick. ‘After their hectic year of hard work (!!) David (Furnish) and I wanted the family to have a private holiday in the safety and tranquillity of our home’.
A hectic year of hard work? Oh do fuck off, ducky.That’s a year of twelve hour shifts in A and E.
But here’s the main thing, Your Ladyship. It rankles when people like the Hewitts pronounce on the dangers of climate change, while not seeming to care about the impact of their own behaviour. The ‘do as I say, not as I do’ attitude of ‘Very Important People’ really grates on the rest of us.
What pisses on our chips even more is when a supercilious, brown-nosing ‘celebrity’ then tells us what to think on the subject. I (not so) respectfully suggest that you ram your opinion up your fat arse, if you can find room for it up there. Just who do you think you are? Oh let me guess; you’re the Fairy Queen of England, right?
Fuck off, you ridiculous old tart.
Nominated by Ron Knee
A poptastic duckie, regal cunting please for the People’s Princess, and elderly pop “icon” Elton John, for his limp-wristed, gushing, crawling arse-licking to Harry Hewitt and his missus. The Queen Mother may have died in 2002, but she lives on in the portly (despite the corset) bewigged figure of this deluded old nancy boy:
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-49398852
Old Elton uses his arse a lot, but now he is talking through it as well, claiming that he “offset” Harry’s carbon footprint. You will know Mr and Mrs Hewitt used three private jets within a week, despite the Prince’s hypocritical lecturing which meant do as we say, not as we do. Ginger cunt. Well, if the old bender (the other ginger cunt) had a brain he would know that you cannot in actuality do this.. all the mega-rich can do is salve their conscience in this ostentatious, virtue signalling way. He says he and “David”, his wife, wanted to ensure the bearded wonders safety as Harry’s mum was his “dear friend”. Spare us. Just because he is an old queen doesn’t make him a member of the royal household, and just like another pop superstar (or so they imagine) Cliff Richard, who used to offer his holiday home to the Princess Blair, you get sick and tired of these worn out old has-beens grovelling to the Establishment.
I just hope Harry or his missus didn’t slip on all the KY Jelly they found on the floor of the bathroom, and we can only hope Archie didn’t put the butt plug in his mouth, or indeed any other orifice.
Nominated by W. C. Boggs
Hey Elton! Aren’t Super injunctions a wonderful invention.
Wha-at? You don’t know to what I’m referring?
Upon my word,I think you do.
It’s a little bit funny…how you prevent the Press from reporting. Secrets as ridiculous as that deceased weasel on your bald pate.
Psh. Lavish, EU-loving, chubby end-of-the-pier cabaret cunt.
32
Oh Captain ducky darling,
How dare you say that to Elton,
Dont you know hes a national treasure?!
Yes along with the markle hewitts hes saving the world, hes megarich so better than us, and beyond criticism.
Although hope in the plane crash Ed Sheerhans in Eltons co pilot and markles traveling in the undercarriage.
15
Morning MNC
The only thing he’s saving is his own arse via gagging orders on the Press regarding the fecäl stains on his lounge carpet. He’s made a living out of scribbling a few tunes and wearing ‘zany’ glasses forty years ago although his “career” isn’t the only thing he’s stretched out.
National Treasure. International Cunt.
21
Christ I just googled that gagging order. What a bunch of bummers.
10
Good spot there Capt,most people would have made the common mistake of thinking it was a Pine Marten upon his bonce.
8
Ps
You obviously paid attention to Kate Humbles spring watch lessons on how to identify a furry glen.
7
“end of the pier cabaret cunt”…excuse me while I recover. Probably unsurpassable, but I haven’t read all the comments yet.
7
Lol well said ‘ol bean..
Yeh I new this, this character when he had no hair . . .
4
Has he got a star trek Tribble on his bald crown?
6
Super injunctions work. It’s not as if Gina Miller has forbidden talk of her yeasty vagînal discharge.
3
Two wonderful cuntings daaarhlings!
I suspect he would take out injunctions to stop the press telling us that he is fat two faced brown nosing cock sucker to the Royals.
Erm, sorry Reg but we already knew i’m afraid.
And take that candle out of your massive arse and put it back in the wind you fraudulent twat.
12
Morning Cap,
Oh you wicked little bleeder!
Eltons so talented, his wife an kids must be so proud of him!
Bet hes busy planting trees this minute, sweating away his hands full of calluses, panting with exertion trying to save mankind,,
And you mock his prescription glasses!
14
I wonder would happen if one of “his” boys brought home a bird when they hit their teens.
Quentin John: Dad, I’ve…erm, I’ve got something to tell you.
Elton: What is it, treacle? You can tell us anything.
Quentin John: Well, I’m…I’m…not gay.
Elton: You what?
Quentin John: I’m not a homö….and…this is my girlfriend, Jenny.
Elton: GIRL-FRIEND? What the fuck! We haven’t brought you up surrounded by bouquets of flowers, ôrgies in the lounge, and an endless stream of flakey celebrity fåggots to be presented with a GIRL- friend. The shame of it. What will the neighbours say? What will my flakey celebrity fåggot friends say?
Quentin John: I apologise.
Elton: Look at the state of that dress, David. And those shoes! And her fingernails….
13
Its a jet fuel gobbling carbon enriching smack in the mouth to St Greta.
The poor little, slightly mental, angel endured shitting in a bucket, eating cold food and being thrown around in a carbon free racing yacht for two weeks to save the planet – for what!!
So the bum bandit can give a free ride in a private jet to the son of the shag happy princess and ruin St Greta’s sacrifice. If carbon offsetting was legitimate St Greta would have taken a flight to the USA but she didnt so fuck off Elton and stop trying to justify your cuntish action!
Oh, and fuck off St Greta, with all the crew flights needed to take you to the USA ‘carbon free’ it would have been less damaging for you to fly there you stupid little twat!
15
Hey just realised!
Thats not Elton in picture,
Its Dick Fiddler in his hunting pinks!!
14
Busted, Dick!
9
It’s the human centipede of celebs spewing recycled virtue shite bandwagon coming to a town near you soon.
Bunch of sick narcissistic cunts the lot of them.
9
In a Doctor Who story from 2007 The Master took over the world and had a ‘celebrity purge’… Meaning he killed every celebrity on the planet… Someone in the episode remarked on him offing both Des Lynham and Des O’ Connor… Bloody shame it wasn’t real… Imagine every virtue signaling
and pampered celebricunt in an intergalactic mincer…
7
Reg is such a daaaaaarling that i’m surprised he hasn’t engineered a reconciliation between Princess Snowflake and her dreadful, common as muck, father. Wouldn’t it be nice if Fatboy Reg could fly the cunt out to Blighty on his private jet, offset the carbon footprint, and allow him to see his only grandchild? Or perhaps Baldybollocks Reg could buy him a grandchild from some poor family. After all poor people only exist for Richarse Reg to patronise and tell what to do. I’m sure his dearest friends , the Prince and Princess of Snob would be most grateful, the fucking stinkhole parasites.
13
Brilliant cunting.
If I had the chance I would love to launch a brick from five foot into the bumboys face.
7
Dame Elton Bogg is undoubtably the Cunt of the Millennium and a has been fucking bent prick trading of songs he sung 40 years ago (and were written by Bernie Taupin anyway). Just thinking about this cunt makes me ill. I wish he’d stick his head where the sun doesn’t shine.
10
He’s a cunt. He always was a cunt, and he always will be a cunt. And come the revolution and the cunt gets his just deserts I hope to buy a piece of the rope. Cunt.
8
Haha, buy a piece of the rope!!
😀
4
Saturday Night’s Alright For Fisting.
2
Not my own. Mark Twain on Cecil Rhodes – as some erudite cunt here is sure to remind us!
3
Mark it down as yours Ozzy, dead cunts cant object!
Anyway Rhodes would of wanted you to have it!
4
There’s already a candle up there! Reg the fat baldy Cunt.
3
Meanwhile the Duchess of Freeload has flown out to America to support her dear rich friend, Serena, playing in the tennis tournament thingy. Apparently she travelled on a “commercial flight”, but I bet they gave her a seat at the end of the aisle and an extra packet of peanuts. I wonder if daaaarling Reg paid for the ticket and sweated his fat arse off planting a couple of trees somewhere on one of his estates. Such a sweetie daaaarlings.
11
They should never allow yanks into the royal family. The last yank that tried to get in caused a constitutional crisis and an abdication. They just lower the tone because they don’t know how to behave. I give Sparkle 5 years max before she fucks off back to that sleazy dump, Tinseltown – with or without the spare heir.
14
Hope the Ditchess of Freeload was safe travelling on a commercial airline. Us plebs know how unsafe commercial airlines can be. We are all so stupid and so poor that why we use them of course, and always Economy class.
Unlike her who will be lauding it up in first class.
She will end up nationally despised and be the end of the royal family.
13
And a banana, I hope.
4
I’m putting this cunt on my next deadpool which I regard as more of a wishlist.
11
You should ask Shaun if he wouldn’t mind . He has an amazingly high success ratio on Deadpool.
8
All this crap about waster royals and bitchy old injunction loving brown eye cowboys, is purely to force us to avoid the utter fuckfest that our government has become. Payback day may be approaching I’ve worked a lovely edge on my broadheads.
Reg could offset his carbon footprint by shooting himself. I will plant two Oaks to offset the carbon produced by the ignition of the propellant in the cartridge. Pretty fair what.
13
To think we could have been rid of this fucker years ago if it wasn’t for the singer Long John Baldry “saving” him. . . . . . . .
Someone Saved My Life Tonight (1975)
The song refers to Elton’s suicidal late 1960s feelings as a struggling, musician engaged to be married. The “someone” is musician friend Long John Baldry, who offered advice. Ironically, shortly after the song’s release, an again stressed-out Elton took 60 Valium pills, dived into a pool and yelled, “I’m going to die!”
It was discovered soon after that the ‘Valium’ were in fact Love Hearts.
10
ODd on love hearts! Hahaha,
Dead by swizzels, good job it wasnt parma violets lethal them!
What killed Sid Vicious.
6
Why doesn’t he do the decent thing and retire?
https://imgflip.com/i/39xdh9
7
Word is Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II is far from happy with the chocolate princess that is Meg O’ Marple…
Although she said she would agree to all royal codes and protocol before marrying the ginger upper class twat of the year it appears that Megan still has agents and ‘people’ in Hollyweird doing things for her ‘career’… Only a matter of time before this goes tits up… Even someones as dim as Harry will eventually suss that he married an opportunistic starfucker….
13
I would have thought getting her hooks into Hewitt the dimmo was the best thing she could ever do for her career. Once she’s finished with the cunt she’ll be a bigger star than she could have ever imagined.
The boy Hewitt will be left with his dolphin tattoo, his vegan diet sheet and his poor broken heart.
12
Also from the royal rumour mill: word is that palace staff view Megan Mog as the biggest and most obnoxious cunt they have ever had the misfortune to work for…. Seriously though, there will be butlers and servants in the royal employ that have more breeding than that well above her station choccydrop trollop…
6
You sure Norman, she’s a bigger cunt than the Duke of Peedough, formally York?
2
Starfucker starfucker starfucker starfucker star.
1
Can we spare a thought for David Furnishings, the mother of Sir Elton’s two children (yes he’s on the birth certificate)
It can’t be easy taking it up the arse from Fat Reg every night, not to mention suppressing the laughter when the badger pelt flies over your head as he’s pumping his spunk up your bumhole. Fucking hell, the things women have to go through.
20
You been on the, none session, 6.8% craft beer last night Freddie? You seem a little confused. ‘David’ is the giver, Fat Reggie is the receiver.
2
Elton has two biological children, despite being a bum-bandit. He could have adopted, but no, his and the partner’s special DNA had to be shared out to add two more statistical numbers to this already overpopulated planet. He has no right to complain about other people contributing to climate change when he has done plenty of damage himself.
But fuck piss and biscuits Harry and that grifter wench of his, too.
10
At one time one positive thing to be said for those of The Gayness was that they helped keep the population explosion down, now why is it that two men or two wimmin want to produce children?. It’ the latest must have accessory for thoe of the Mangledbum tendency. Apart from anything else, can’t they imagine what the children will endure at school with all the piss taking.? Why don’t they do like they used to do and get a poodle or a cat?
7
Has that cunt Tom Daley had a vicious and public falling out with ‘the wife’ yet? Rest assured, it’ll come…
7
Handbags, or swimming goggles at dawn!
3
As noted above, Markle hastily booked a commercial flight to go and watch a game of tennis in New York. It now emerges that Serena’s coach is worried by this, as the last time Markle watched one of Serena’s games, Serena lost.
https://www.thesun.co.uk/fabulous/9881676/meghan-markle-us-open-serena-williams-coach-worried/
Questions as yet unanswered: who paid the flight and accommodation bills for an American actress to watch an American playing in an American match? Question instantly answerable: who paid the flight and accommodation bills for the mandatory detachment of the royal protection squad to accompany her?
Mind you, I can see Markle losing a good chunk of black wimminz cred if Serena does lose.
Meghan Jinx Costs William Final!
(I Told You Not To Come says Ex-Friend Serena.)
Do it, Andreescu.
9
She did. 6-3, 7-5. The power of prayer, not that I’d normally give a fuck.
1
Serena in the Mist loses again! I’m actually beginning to have a degree of sympathy for Markle. On top of the legitimate criticism she’s now seriously being labeled a jinx on the ball swatting gorilla.
4
‘Ms’ Tyson, (anybody ever seen Serena and Mike in a room together) got a good arse whooping, despite her sista’s presence.
2
“Need a holiday after a hard years work”. Get fucked you fat cunt. I’m not trying to play the sympathy card but I’ve just done a 45 hour week on minimum wage, working with arseholes, twats, pricks and cunts that would that would make a monk swear like a docker. I’m sick of these preaching rich motherfuckers telling me how to run my own life. Fuck off.
23
Whenever I hear or read about megan, I keep thinking when Optimus Prime said, “Megatron must be stopped, no matter the cost”.
8
I’m still standing, sang Fat Reg….
I’m not fucking surprised, it’d be pretty painful to sit on such a worn out and overused arse…
13
Great noms Kneesie and Boggsie (to be so familiar but the football season has started and I am being influenced by the breezy nickname-loving commentators).
It´s good to know there are other people out there who can´t stand these pontificating popinjays who gave up living in the real world decades ago or in the case of the royals have never lived in the real world. I couldn´t believe it when I read that Charles´ butler squeezed the toothpaste onto his royal toothbrush. No doubt he shook his royal weenie to get the royal drips of piss off then wiped the royal arse with monogrammed paper.
7
This made me laugh. Elton on his day off away from the cameras. It’s uncanny.
He looks ruff…
https://www.canstockphoto.com/dog-wearing-clothing-27135854.html
4
Afternoon pop pickers. The wife and I are just back from our hols (got to bed about half four this morn so feeling a bit seedy just now).
Looking forward to catching up on all the cunting that’s been going on while I’ve been away.
The wife says ‘hi’.
Ron
7
Welcome back Ron. Well, the country is even more of a banana republic than when you went away and Boris facing the possibility of jail if he refuses to delay Brexit. Good here innit?
6
Cheers LL.
Yeah I could only be arsed getting bullet point news while I was away, and even that was a complete pain. Fucking cunts. Wish I was still on Gran Canaria!
5
Nuke the cunt in his french villa just as his wife gets to the vinegar stroke.
Carbon offset that you fat poof.
7
Elton Hercules John ( whose real name is Reginald Kenneth Dwight, bet you didn’t know that ), is a slippery, olive oil loving, Chocolate Chunk Road of a Cunt.
Get To Fuck, sweetie.
4
Elton John is a fat cunt. That’s it. No more, no less.
3
He needs a bloody good fisting. Rearrange his innards good n proper.
2
Careful. Elton might enjoy that.
0
I for one wouldn’t at all be surprised to learn that Freddie Mercury faked his death just to avoid this cunt.
5
Come to think of it,a lot of his chums karked it.. Versace, Diana, Freddie, George Michael… Are they all on an island somewhere thinking “thank fuck that Elton cunt won’t bother us here…”!!
8
Beemack, that made me laugh. I nearly joked on my drink! 🙂
1
*choked
Forking spell check thing!
1
This filthy disgusting creature can’t get Aids fast enough for me, he is a repulsive fat bastard who belongs at the bottom of Barrymore’s pool.!
3
Fat Reg and his hypocrisy makes me laugh Brown nosing the Royals who probably have more money than him anyway.Offset your own carbon footprint you scrounging tight fisted bastards.
1