I nominate office collections for a cunting.
This is one of those things that starts off as a nice idea. Gladys is retiring after 35 years, and we want to get her a card and something to remember us by.
Unfortunately, it then it gets taken to the fucking extreme and you start having to have a ‘whip round’ because Jane’s split up with her boyfriend (for the umpteenth fucking time,) or Tim in accounts goldfish has died at the weekend and people come around asking for a couple of quid like a mafia protection racket…woe betide anyone who doesn’t want to pay.
I tend to keep quiet when these things go around and discreetly leave the room, mainly because I’m a tight bastard and don’t see why I should give someone money for doing their fucking job. Isn’t that what you get wages for??
Anyway it was found out that I hadn’t put money into the collection for someone. When I explained the reason was that I have only met them when they started and we’ve never said a word to each other because we work in different teams, you’d think I’d admitted to drowning kittens.
Bastards….every one of them
Nominated by The Final Cuntdown
Hollywood star Richard Gere has called upon the Italian government to assist migrants who have been stranded on a Spanish charity boat in the Mediterranean for more than a week.
None of your business Dick so keep your fucking big hooter out of it.
Cunt.
11
Too right, willie.
I fucking hate celebrity do gooders. They get off on the fact that they are ‘standing up for the little people’, showboating wankers.
They don’t live in the REAL world, like the rest of us plebs. It is easy to have a social conscience when you don’t have to deal with the shit brought to shores by migrants. He is buffered from reality in his Beverly Hills mansion or wherever the hell he resides, interfering asshole.
3
I worked for a while in a call centre. A few decent blokes in my group,who,like me,couldn’t have given one fuck about the job and looked out for one another,since we were mostly skiving cunts. But most of the others there were the kind of cunts we all love to hate- blue hair,large dopey earrings, tofu chomping. Lots of shirtlifters/lezzas, with dozens of rainbow flags about the place,and a high percentage if Lammy lookalikes and peacefuls.So it gave me great pleasure to refuse every single time someone-usually a dizzy bint from H.R.- came round with her hand out either for a member of staff or for “charidee”. Not one fucking penny did I hand over. I sometimes donate to charity,so I don’t need some grinning cowbag trying to coax more moolah out of me. And as for the collections for staff members I barely know,yet still despise,they can get fucked.
6
I’m delighted to always refuse to give a single penny to any and all collections.
I’m well known to be a cunt so they can fuck off.
Nicely crafted cunting thank you.
6
What cunt’s impersonating me? I’ve never even worked in a fucking office. Not my nom. Admin?
2
Didn’t realise the name was already taken. Sorry.
I’ll have to use another moniker in future.
2
Ah, thanks for clearing that up. There isn’t really any way of finding out which monikers are taken on the site, is there? Good cunting, by the way.
2
I’m with you on this. Gladys, or Barbara, or fucking Tracey, only worked there for 145 years because no one else would’ve employed her. They’re a total cunt to deal with. Everything was better… 10, 20, 100 years ago at the company. Always have to bog down an already shitty, pointless, meeting with how x, y, z change has been tried before etc. and how the company is shit to work for now. The company is shit, but it probably always was. Watching your pruned mouth that resembles a tortoises puckered arsehole won’t change that. Eat your fucking cake and disappear from our lives, you genuinely be forgotten within hours of leaving. And make sure you take your scented candles and half dead bouquet of flowers that I didn’t contribute a goddamn penny towards.
0