Anti-Smoking Nazis

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It’s about time anti-smoking Nazis were nominated for a cunting. Jeremy Vine that most left wing of BBC lefties, has been whingeing about “pushed off his table in the in the sun by smoker’s lack of consideration”. He then goes on to ask if smokers should be banned from pub gardens and restaurant tables outside in this weather. Naturally, his slavish followers decided that, yes, they should.

Personally, my answer would be no. Let’s take a moment to consider the reason that smokers now occupy the outside spaces of pubs and restaurants. FUCKING WHINGEING NON-SMOKERS. For years, these miserable bastards complained about not being able to enjoy their monthly pint of Pimms in their local pub/wine bar, because of smokers sparking up a ciggie, pipe or cigar. In comes Blair and promptly bans smoking inside. Result? Thousands of pubs have forced to close through lack of business, because the once a month cunts who complained about smokers, and only went to the pub once a month, stopped going. Pub regulars also stopped going, because they realised it was cheaper and easier to buy a few bevvies from the local off-licence of supermarket, invite your mates round and sit comfortably at home, drinking, talking, watching tv, playing darts and, more importantly, smoking, without having to endure listening to some smug, sanctimonious prick complaining about how evil smoking is.

I do this with my man cave. Every Friday night, my mates and I congregate in the “105” (a reference to the 105mm field gun, beloved of members of HM Royal Regiment of Artillery). We play darts, poker, pool now that I have a table and watch TV. I now have two beer engines, so we can partake of our Thatcher’s or Boddi’s in the manner of a proper pub. Great times are had by all. And at this time of year, a Barbie is laid on. Those who partake of cigarettes may do so without criticism, I myself am partial to the odd Cuban cigar.

Anyway. It is the likes of Vine, joyless, selfish, self-important cunts, who think they have a God given right to tell everyone how they should live their lives, who are responsible for pushing smokers into beer gardens. They no right to whinge, now that the sun has finally come out, that they can’t enjoy sitting outside because of smokers. Vine, you cunt, IT’S YOUR FAULT, NOT THEIRS. You wanted smokers out of pubs, you got it. The beer gardens and outside areas of restaurants belong to smokers now. So shut your fucking mouth and deal with it.

Of course, the simple solution to this, would have been to give brewers, freeholders and other hostelry owners the choice of whether or not they would allow smoking in their premises. It would have been fair and democratic. But no, the likes of Vine and his fellow nicotine Nazis wanted it all. They got it, and now we have far fewer pubs than we should have. It would also have shown up the leftie pricks for what they are, because the pubs, clubs and restaurants that continued to allow smoking would have proven far more popular.

Nominated by Quick Draw McGraw

43 thoughts on “Anti-Smoking Nazis”

  1. Can we have a protest group to ban noisy fucking kids from pubs please!?

    But of course the Left would knock that on the head because “kids are precious” and “my child is an angel, and it’s my right to let it play in the pub and be a right annoying cunt to the ignorant child-haters!”

    The anti-thisthatandtheother brigades all need to be rounded up, stood up against a wall and shot … or worse, each spending a day in a locked room having sex with Diane Abbott!

    • I would very much like a protest group to ban noisy fucking shouty Eastern Europeans from our streets.

      And for the big fucking dark key who keeps asking me and my neighbour for a pound each and every time we venture into Ipswich town centre.

      Fucking cunts the lot of them.

      A far as smoking is concerned, as a lifelong non smoker, I feel smoking outside and in the fresh air should be allowed. Or in those designated no smoking areas in pubs or public spaces.

  2. I haven’t smoked a fag for nearly six years. I want to, but no cunt is taking a tenner off me for a packet of Bensons.

    The cost to the NHS for obesity related treatments are now on par with those related to smoking, but I’m sure a Big Mac isn’t a tenner.

    My mate runs a family sign writing firm that started in the 50’s. Mostly brewery work.
    Ten years ago had 14 on the payroll, now just two.
    Pubs were finding it hard enough before the smoking ban….

    If brewery chains want to make a percentage of their premises available to smokers, let them….

    • Last time I checked it was 5billion paided out by NHS for smoking related illnesses. And 55billion spent on obesity related illnesses.

      Thats not to mention the giant amount spent dealing with alcoholics and the police ambulances services to clean them up every Thursday – Sunday.

      Us smoker are just the easy target they would never dare to make all the grog bottles/cans a nice shade of shitty green and 50% of it being warnings and pics of alcohol related illness and death. Hidden behind a sliding door cunt.

      I dont drink and dont really care if anyone else does it don’t it’s your choice. Same with any substance that’s currently illegal your body your choice .

      All substances are equal ( But some are more qual then others).

  3. One of my pet hates. Congrats on the excellent cunting.

    The smoking ban killed the pub industry. If landlords didn’t want people smoking in a pub then they could have had that rule in place but they seldom did so as it would be business suicide. I stopped frequenting the pubs when forced to stand outside in the freezing fucking cold, getting a headache from a strange heater hanging by the smoking area and I’m not the only one. There’s currently 52 closed pubs / bars within a one mile radius of my home leaving just 47 remaining. Most of them are shit.

    One small saving grace is that between 10.30am and midday my local pub unlocks a side door and have an early morning lock in. Out come the old chunky ashtrays and a packet of John Player Specials and you can sit at the bar and have a good old smoke.

    Jeremy Vine is a cunt. “I was slightly inconvenienced and now it’s a huge issue.” Get fucked, you spread misery and lies to millions of people every day, that’s far more harmful than fucking smoking.

    I’d bet that the majority of Vine and his ilk have hotboxed their tent at Glasto. Hypocritical jumped up cunts the lot if them.

  4. Top shelf cunting sir.
    Communism never works out well,especially when it comes to telling people where they can have a nice fag.
    I also cannot fucking abide that feeble little twat Vine.
    CUNTS.

  5. The destruction of the “traditional” UK pub-going culture was deliberate.
    All part of the plan, another bit of old Britain killed off.
    Tony Blair is a cunt. As are all who sail with him…

  6. Another load of shit we can thank St Tony Blair for. Although Tony wasn’t so anti smoking when he tried to excuse formula one from the advertising ban. Then it emerged that Ecclestone had bunged the Labour Party several million pounds so he had to backtrack like a cunt.
    Pubs closing suits the ruling class……it keeps us at home watching telly and having our brains turned to mush. Ironically, in order for pubs to be successful these days they have to be crammed with fucking huge telly screens. Which ever way we turn they’ve got us by the balls.
    Cunts.

  7. Good cunting. These cunts are desperately unhappy with their lives and want to spread their misery. Fascist cunts who’ll move on to bald people or smelly people soon.

    Mind you, smelly people have no fucking excuse. Cunts.

  8. I am proud to be an anti-smoking Nazi. You smokers are the most ridiculous people on earth. You should take a look at yourselves as you desperately clutch your phallic symbol fags, inhale the venomous vapour deep into your lungs, spread the poison throughout your systems and then cough your guts up. You then regurgitate the smoke – like taking a shit in public – and expect those nearby not to complain.

    I once kissed a girl who had been smoking. It was licking an ashtray. I bet she is a horrible old bag now with a pickled leathery face, a fitting fate for selfish smokers. As my wise teacher said many years ago, “If God had wanted us to smoke he would have put a chimney on our heads”.

    • Then he must have been a cunt for believing in fairies in the first place.

      • Forty two years since I had a fag but I’m not going to knock smokers. There should be areas set aside so that each of us can do our own thing. Places designated for open air orgies would be my choice.

      • Nothing turns me on like a fit bird wearing black plastic framed glasses and smoking a tab.

        When I first knew my soon to be wife (a lifelong non-smoker) I got her to pose for pictures with a tab. She wore glasses too but they were the wrong style.

      • Posed for pictures did she…nudge nudge wink wink say no more…

        Morning RTC.

      • Evening IY… Dick.

        My wife was a bit of a goer. She came from Purley.

    • Smoking is a disgusting habit and it’s nice to be able to go out for a few pints and not breathe in noxious smoke and at the end of the evening not have your clothes stink of fag smoke.
      Also there is the leathery skin and brown teeth that most smokers end up with.

  9. I see Greene King are advertising on the radio that their pubs are the best place to see the Netball World Cup. Fucking hell! I wonder how many pints they expect to shift with that load of shit? I can’t see the place being packed out with butch trannies knocking back the Guinness can you?

    • I shall be their dressed in my cocktail dress sipping Martini and lemonade. Afterwards I shall be going to a Kylie drag show. You can come if you like. It will be fabulous plus I can do you hair and give you a makeover, 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

      • as a member of tv chics i remember the smoking ban discussion.
        someone said it should only be for artistic purposes
        don’t know how you go .

  10. I stopped smoking 36 years ago, along with my best friend who immediately turned into an anti-smoking Nazi.

    The following 2 months+ were spent with him ranting on about all the inconsiderate cunts who were smoking wherever he went, blaming them for every setback in his quest to be free of the evil weed. We couldn’t go anywhere without him getting apoplectic whenever we encountered some poor cunt enjoying a quiet smoke.

    Naturally he blamed other smokers when he inevitably fell off the wagon. Last I heard he’d become an anti-salt Nazi too.

  11. In my experience, the worst culprits for this are ex-smokers. They suddenly become holier-than-thou, just because they have conquered their craving and had the will power to stop. They then hold that against every other fucker who has NOT quit smoking and look down their snotty nose at them.

    I have smoked on and off since I was 17 years old, currently off and I intend to stay that way. My Uncle’s death from complications due to lung cancer hit me very hard and was a huge wake up call, so that was it for me. It seemed stupid to keep smoking when I was so on and off with it anyway.

    Yes, I was a nurse. No, this is not a good example, but then I was a Paediatric Nurse, so there was no hypocrisy as I was not in the position of telling every patient I saw to quit as it as bad for their health, so I feel no guilt at all. Plus, if all of those judgemental, patronising, Nazi cunts had to do my job, working up to 60 hours a week, for 12 and a half hours a shift under an enormous amount of daily stress, they too would be reaching for the Marlboros, so they can all GET TO FUCK as far as I am concerned. When they have worked all fucking day on a full ward, with barely any staff and not had even a tea break 8 hours in, then they are allowed an opinion.

    I totally get why people smoke. It is PERSONAL CHOICE, but the anti-smoking brigade have gone way too far now to the point of fascism, just because they do not want their air polluted.The fact that they are probably inhaling more noxious fumes from the very environment we live in (especially in big cities) seems to go over their heads and not bother them whatsoever, fucking morons.

    There should be specific social places that smokers can still go. If non-smokers don’t want to be around smokers, they then would not have to be and all would be happy, and maybe not so many traditionally British pubs would be having to close for business every damned day. Yes, it is cheaper to have some beer or whatever at home, but a trip to a pub is still a nice option to have on a Summer’s evening.

    As for Jeremy Vine, I cannot abide that rancid, overly opinionated little cock. Awww, diddums couldn’t sit in the sun because of a nasty smoker?

    WELL FUCK OFF HOME THEN, TWATWAFFLE. I assume that on your wage, you have such a thing as a garden and a garden table?

    CUNT.

  12. Always makes my day to see the smokers outside of hospitals, taking their drip-stands for a walk so they can have a gasper. Yellow finger tips, skin like a shammy-leather and sounding like a biscuit tin full of marbles when they cough. Then again, at least they don’t piss on the stretcher like the alkies do!

  14. I enjoy it when these “Anti” zealots ,be it drinking,smoking,hunting,whatever. build themselves into a self-righteous fury. They are many things of which I disapprove,but I never get into the kind of paddy that they seem to manage…I’m just not sufficiently interested in what anybody else does to really care.

    Most of these “”ban-it” brigade are sad little people who like to pretend that their concern is for “the greater good”,when really it is just an attempt to get noticed and perhaps,for once in their empty,trivial lives,make some kind of impact.

    Fuck them.

  15. I’ll never forget one night when some tart was complaining about the fag smoke in the beer garden and the cry went up to FUCK OFF INDOORS THEN YOU CUNT.

    The one thing that pisses me off is kids at the bar. Fuck off and sit down you little cunts. Kids in pubs when I was a kid it was sat in the back of the car bottle of Coke, packet of crisps and a warning to behave or else ringing in your ears.

    • nursery’s are for kids, the WVRS is a place of refuge for women, pubs used to be the Bastion of men

    • ‘..Kids in pubs when I was a kid it was sat in the back of the car bottle of Coke, packet of crisps…’

      Almost the same, minus the car…used to sit on the step outside, though when it rained was allowed inside into the ‘women’s snug’ (this was back in the days women weren’t allowed into the bar).

      On balance, I’d probably say ‘fond memories’, these ‘ladies’ were mostly mill workers and fishwives (literally & figuratively) of the wartime generations…all I remember is loud, raucous laughter, the smell of gin and cheap perfume, headscarves, and smiling, haggard faces everywhere..

      (the pub is still there…it’s now usually full of poseur cunts)

  16. Oh and Jeremy Vine is a complete cunt did’nt he nearly get road raged back along?
    Pity they did’nt take the wanker out then.
    His daddy should have rolled over and shot him out the window, or had head off his Mrs instead.

  17. I was walking round a 19 acre historical site when some Johnny foreigner type broke into a fucking coughing fit after walking past me and inhaling the smoke from my pipe (from tobacco probably from her sodding country).
    Fucking over exaggerating bitch, felt like kicking her in the cunt then dragging her down to the Thames so she could find out what pollution really is.

    Apart from that had a reasonably nice day, but shocked at the hostage prices charged at the venue, £5 for a sprite and a knob of ice cream in a paper tub.

  19. No holier-than-thou anti-smoking fuckwit puts as much money into the system as your average smoker. If the governments Chief Medical Officer actually gave a shit about your health, they’d ban smoking… only they can’t afford to.

    Smokers contribute huge sums of money via direct taxation on tobacco products. Non-smokers don’t.

    Moreover, smokers (mostly) die younger, thus saving the state a fucking fortune in pensions and end-of-life care.

    Excellent nom, Quick Draw and yes, Jeremy fucking Vine is indeed, unquestionably, an utter fucking cunt.

  20. Happy to start off a nom on the cuntish Jeremy Vine, unless someone else has a more powerful force of venom sitting ready to be unleashed?

  21. Spot-on cunting.
    Inconsiderate smokers are utter cunts, like every other inconsiderate cunt out there, but not all smokers are like this.

    Banning smoking in vehicles with kids was a good idea, we’ve never smoked in our house either because the wife was pregnant when we first moved in together (11yrs ago).

    Banning smoking in pubs was a fucking stupid idea that killed an industry.

  22. Always enjoyed this story
    Working with O’Toole during the filming of King Ralph, John Goodman, asked the revered actor if he might borrow an ashtray.

    O’Toole flicked his cigar ash on the floor.

    “Make the world your ashtray, my boy.”

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