Vive la France! ‘
Aux armes, citoyens,
Formez vos batallions..’
Oh, I better get on with it.
Yeah ‘Blucher Street’ just down the road (from where I grew up) ‘Bismarck Street’ we used to play on. ‘The King of Prussia’ pub. That’s right-we were on the side of Germany in history. ‘Our Germanic cousins’ it was. The jokes about the Royal Family being German. Yes, WHY was there an Hanoverian Succession? Why would we hand over over the Court to Hanover? What was that about? Starting to read a bit of history now when the church across the road (from my childhood home) was pulled down. But they put an information board up it was a ‘Waterloo church’; churches built to celebrate the defeat of Napoleon. Oh, I see.
Blucher was the General in charge of the German forces allied with Great Britain at Waterloo I found out. Starting to get it. Napoleon must be defeated at all costs. Why?
You know cunters Napoleon was a fucking great bloke. A giant of a man, ‘the little corporal’. The way he’s portrayed in English history its though he’s some kind of precursor to Hitler. All out for European domination- conquering for conquering sake. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Napoleon was about, first and foremost, spreading the ideas of the French Revolution. Making them concrete. What were those ideas? That ordinary men could run the country. Simply that. That common men could RULE. Not the Aristocracy. That the French people or any other people didn’t just make up the state but MADE THE STATE. Now that was (and is) truly Revolutionary. How did he implement it? The Napoleonic Code. Still in operation in many parts of Europe. Too long to go into.
So he was about spreading the ideas of real democracy, justice, civic duty. The people became ‘Citizens ‘ with rights..
Germany. I’m afraid the only word I can come up with, that sums them up, the word; Barbarian. Christianized late it never really did ‘take’. The more Northern you go the more of a Barbarian you are. Maybe. Anyway, we took the the side of Germany. Against France. The Barbarian against the Citizen. And fought for and rescued and defended Germany for three centuries. For fucking Prussia essentially. The MOST barbaric of the Germanic tribes. Chesterton said Frederick the Great had the ‘soul of an ape’. Like a Disney world-Hard to explain but dreamy, anarchic, aristocratic, MILITARISTIC. It’s gone into legend how brutal the Prussian soldier was.
Finally, finally England awoke and saw who had been the real enemy all along. The First World War.
So the French have ‘good democratic blood’ and a fighting spirit. What has put all this back in my mind is contemporary movement. The Yellow Vests. You wouldn’t know it is still going on (and has been going all over France for three months). It flared up again in Paris last weekend. When I read cunters on here decrying the French for their weakness and ‘cheese eating’….I think at least they are doing something. We take to the sofa while the French take to the streets. We ought to imitate more the French spirit. It is pleasing to me that the man who was arrested for ‘harassing’ Anna Soubry was wearing a yellow vest at his hearing.
I wish there was another Revolution.
‘Marchon, marchon!
Qu’un sang impur
Abreuve now silons!’
Nominated by Miles Plastic
This must be the only cunting I’ve read that defends the title of the piece. I might have missed something here, but shouldn’t the title be The Jermans or Francophobes? Just saying.
12
So is this cunting the frogs, or praising them?
*genuinely confused*
11
Yes confused. If I retitle it here: FRANCOPHOBIA
3
The cunts were fucking useless in 1939 though…
15
The French are a bunch of ungrateful slimy frogs who’ve never forgiven us for saving them in the second world war, but I agree, in some respects they’re better that the Germans.
8
They still are. That little fucker Macron is the Gallic version of Anthony Blair – an oily heap of shit full of piss and wind. Fuck the lot of them.
10
D’accord Monsieur Plastic. J’aime les Francais aussi. Speak a bit of French or at least try and they are friendly and helpful. Goes for any different language I reckon. But before the lard arse Brits drag themselves away from daytime television and man the barricades there’s a couple of problems our French friend don’t have. First, where can you find good quality cobblestones to dig up and throw at the old bill these days? Second, I’ve been on eBay and Amazon and can’t find a decent guillotine anywhere. I was looking forward to using it on that useless fat bastard Brandon Lewis 73% of whose constituents voted leave. And how many wimmin know how to knit these days? They’ll be too busy texting to see the heads fall into the basket. Which causes me to ask where can you get a quality wicker basket these days? Ah merde. C’est la vie!
9
I don’t mind the French (apart from Macron and his ugly wife). I like the way they beheaded their aristocracy when the cunts wound them up and I like way that the yellow vests are smashing the shite out of everything to tell Macron what a useless cunt he is.
They are however, French, so they are cunts and deserve to be cunted.
24
I like the yellow vest identity, over here, every council jobsworth paperclip shuffling cunt carrying a clipboard will be mistakenly be hailed a brother (non binary for Sam Smith) – in – arms against the Establishment cunts.
10
Nothing wrong with the French, just the fuckers who rule them !
15
Bad news for the Kraut car makers.
Apparently (from the sun so probably bollocks) the EU are going to force all car makers to fit a restrictor to each car to stop it breaking the speed limit.
Should work well for police chases or overtaking on motorways.
What meddling, authoritarian twats.
Shouldn’t make any difference to our car makers coz we’re leaving, right?
18
Although, sadly, there are no real British car manufacturers, what we had has all been sold to foreign Cunts.
1
I don’t mind the French, to be honest. They know what to do with a parasitic monarchy and establishment and the gillet jeunes movement shows they still have that fire for their bellies.
I genuinely hope Macron and his octogenarian Mrs have to make use of that chopper on the roof they now apparently have on standby at all times. Would love to see the cunt getting ceaucescu’d….ceaucescu’ed…oh, you cunts know what I mean.
12
Can’t spell it either. How about guillotined? Or gaddafi’d? I’d really like to see the slimy selfserving centrist cunt gaddafi’d.
2
The French establishment wouldn’t dare betray the people, like our MPs have done. I don’t like to admit it, but I am a bit envious of their capacity, for civil disobedience.
But I wonder why they rolled over so readily, in 1940 to the nazis ?
I still take satisfaction though through history, starting with that whore Joan of Arc, we always spank them when it matters. I’ll just add though that will change, after this deals been signed off.
Negotiations will have us on our knees, while they dictate what they will take from us, and we can’t say no.
10
The French voted Macron in, ergo they are cunts.
14
A fair point, well made.
Mind you, in the last 22 years we’ve voted in Blair (THREE times), Cameron and May, so perhaps we shouldn’t crow too much.
17
I didn’t mean to imply the British aren’t cunts – they are!
But this cunting is for the French, isn’t it?
10
Ah, but Miles didn’t actually intend to cunt the French, though some cunters did just that in their replies.
So to help us stay on track here’s a summary of the cu(rre)nt state of play:
The French – on balance, cunts, but less so than…
The Germans – the excellence of their beer doesn’t save them from being rightly regarded as arrogant cunts with a penchant for megalomania, but even they fall short of the sheer cuntitude of…
The EU Commissioners, who are cherry picked from the burgeoning ranks of the sort of people who, had they been officers, would have been shot by their own troops…in peacetime!
3
That garden gnome Sarkozy too.
7
I come, briefly, out of my retirement from isacunt.com to reiterate the sage words of one Mr Charles Crawford (late Her Majesty’s Ambassador to Serbia, subsequently in Warsaw before his “retirement”).
“There is nothing in modern British history of any importance which didn’t involve our government sticking it to the French” [Belgrade embassy, over several shandies and much 1960s vinyl, Mr C being a connoisseur of that technology, ca. 2001]
9
Cute ass caughtspedding….
6
The great love of my youth was Anita Pallenberg and she was half German and none French, so Germany gets my vote.
6
Don’t mind the French.
Don’t mind the Spanish.
Quite like the Dutch.
Dislike the Germans.
8
Schweinehund!!
5
Mein gott, RTC!
4
If Hitler was our Prime Minister today, do you think we would have a stabbing problem? Or a Rotherham problem? Would Bradford or Luton even exist?
Hitler was never gonna invade England as he envisioned us ruling our empires side by side. We should have stayed away. Turns out Germany has her European empire anyway.
10
We might have had a Boncentration Bamp problem, CnR…
Mind you, we’ll get them soon enough if Corbyn gets in.
7
Krauts and Frogs.
Between the two cunting countries they have royally fucked up the continent either politically or militarily (namely the goose steepers on the latter) for every fucker else, ESPECIALLY the UK.
The pricks always drag us in either to protect one of them or defeat the other one…..
I carn’t be arsed with either of the twats. One side garlic guzzling surrender monkies and on the other side arrogant, goose stepping war mongers.
On a side note I feel sorry for Switzerland. Just imagine having neighbours like that on both sides!!!
You’d never fucking sell that flat would ya!
Froggy Cunts!
13
Think about England. Weltch to the west, Scotch to the north, Brussels to the east and France to the south. We are truly fucked.
9
Fuck the French and fuck the EU. The EU is a set of French policy disasters: the Common Agricultural Policy, the Common Fisheries Policy, Schengen and the fucking Euro. The EEC/EC/EU was basically set up to stop the Germans from rolling in their tanks and heavy gun every 30 years or so for a bit of artillery practice on the outskirts of gay Paris.
Twice Armchair General Charles de Gaulle (he sulked in London for the duration of WW2, hence Armchair General) wisely vetoed the UK from joining the EEC because he didn’t like Anglo-Saxons. And when he wasn’t vetoing our misguided applications to join the Common Market, he was throwing a big sulk at EEC meetings and not turning up if the fucking Frogs didn’t get their way.
And, ever since we joined, the British taxpayer has been heavily subsidising Frog farmers to produce stinky cheeses and other over-rated nosh. They were very happy to export their produce to us but didn’t like our food heading over the Channel. These disgusting fuckers even burnt British lambs alive in lorries. Also, their fucking ungrateful fishermen have destroyed the UK fishing industry.
The EU is set up to benefit the fucking Frogs and they show no gratitude at all. Of course, no thanks to the UK, the US and the Empire for saving their slimy arses in two world wars. If it wasn’t for vast sums of British and German money going to France via the EEC, etc. their economy would be a fucking basket-case.
Their cuisine is over-rated shit: sauces Hollandaise, Bernaise, etc. It’s all fucking muck.
Armchair De Gaulle, Giscard D’Estaing, Mitterand, Chirac, Sarkosy, Hollande and Granny-Gimp are cunts, the whole fucking lot of them.
Fuck the French (cunts) and vive le Royaume-Uni.
19
What are the three colours of the French flag?
White, white and white.
12
With a shit stain also !
11
HBC et Royaume-Uni nul points.
3
Gay French baker.
Faguette….
6
Mogg & Johnson now jumping on May’s traitorous bandwagon, ready to sell our country down the river and become, in Mogg’s words, a “slave state”, whilst paying £39 billion for the privilege. Yellow turncoat cunts.
11
This appears to be a non cunting of the French. I can see the point. If their MPs behaved the way ours have there would be blood on the streets.
7
My ex-wife was French and was a total cunt, filthy cunt mind but still a cunt
7
I have to agree about the yellow vest protesters. They are at least getting off their arses week in, week out and at least trying to effect some change.
People in this country are too content with 24/7 Sky TV, tweeting on bloody social media & the easily available supply of supermarket cheap beer and crisps. The socialist utopia of the Jarrow March and throngs of disgruntled miners picketting are a long distant memory. People need some backbone, some passion, some fire in their belly, to get up, go out, march, protest, make things happen. We can’t be arsed in this country anymore. We’d rather watch all the crap unfold before our eyes, bitch and moan to our nearest & dearest, then pop the kettle on and open the custard creams.
So in that regard, the French have my respect. If they can just get ‘Macaroon’ to shut his gob, then carry on making quality Brie, Camenbert and Baguettes, I’ll happily live and let live.
9
Pompous arrogant fuckers. A nation devoid of rock stars.
De Gaulle wanted us to stay out of the Eu . Why the fuck did we not say ok big nose we will pass on this one ?
10
“So the common man could rule, NOT the aristocracy”. How did he go about this? By becoming Emperor, and keeping the title in his family.
Another champagne socialist cunt.
6
Macron “Brexit has torn Great Britain apart” This from the leader of France that has civil disorder every Saturday petrol bombs cars turned over, water cannons on the streets of every city. Sort your own Country out before trying to run ours via the EU.
9