Thick Eyebrows

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I understand that some people are utterly immersed in their own retarded universes, but I strongly object to those peculiarities affecting my reality.
Allow me to present to you Thick Eyebrows for a cruel and excessive cunting.

There are clueless girls running round everywhere, it would seem, sporting this abomination, and thinking that it is actually making them look beautiful.
Unfortunately for them, the reality is that cunters like me end up staring at them in total astonishment and disbelief. This is making trips to the supermarket or the pub very difficult, as the law of averages usually presents one of the twats in the form of a cashier who thinks you looking at them means you would like a polite conversation.
WRONG. Totally fucking wrong!
Perhaps they are inspired by their manbag toting beardy homo boyfriends and also wish to look like a circus clown.
What a bunch of deluded fuckwitted cunts.

Nominated by Cuntflap

51 thoughts on “Thick Eyebrows”

  1. Oi love, Ming the Merciless wants his eyebrows back.

    I think these abominations are known as ‘Scouse brows’, popularised by orange chavettes from various reality TV shite.

    • It’s not reality tv, it’s as far removed from reality as possible. That is why Chavs and Chavettes aspire to having non jobs. The brainless CUNTS

  2. Totally agree cuntflap .
    Whoever it is who encourages these females and their fake eyebrows needs a slap .
    I cannot keep a straight face when I come across some of these monstrosities in the streets.

  3. It’s a mark of a social-media addicted, uneducated, reality-tv loving individual. Steer well clear from the dullards.

  4. I couldn’t agree more. I don’t know if they genuinely think they look good, or they’re just doing it because a lot of others are too and thus the conclusion they come to is that it must look good. Either way, they look like they have two slugs that are about to cross paths on their face.

  6. I made this remark about Carolyn Fairbairn when the CBI got cunted but it equally applies here.
    These bitches who have thick eyebrows need to have their cunts slapped with a cactus.

  7. …and let’s not forget that heinous activity of turning two perfectly serviceable and pretty lips into a pound of split liver! A.k.a the “trout pout”.

    An absolutely dreadful accompaniment (along with false tits) to turn naturally pretty girls into fucking horrors!

    • Trout lips and phoney tits – could not agree more Rebel!

      My missus says those slugs on the dippy bint’s eyebrows belong in the brown wheelie bin.

    • Gratifying to know, Rebel, that I am not alone in thinking that these giddy bints end up looking like a mutant hybrid of Marcel Marceau and a fucking burns victim.

    • And don’t forget the bright orange-brown obviously fake “tan”, applied by the megaton & the red lipstick, oh, and the classy whale-tail thong riding up to expose the now obligatory fucking tattoo at the bottom of the back.

      • In my circles we call those FMA tattoos, i.e., a “Fuck Me up the Arse” tattoo.

        Always looked like an invite to me…

  8. I went into Superdrug with Mrs B (to be?) on one of my rare trips into “civilization” and was fascinated by the charlie chaplin eyebrows of the girl on the till, yes she was orange but what really grabbed my attention were her eyebrows.
    They seem to have been applied with a mini gloss roller in the most improbable place to have said follicles, perhaps an attempt to divert attention from the aircraft carrier flight deck sized forehead.
    Oh and she had a fake bun as well.

    • A fake bun you say, Lord B? In the oven, or a variant of syrup like a pom-pom toupée? Not familiar with the latter, but it sounds intriguing–please expatriate further.
      My experience with the Ark Royal (happy days), however, together with your anamnesis produces a far clearer conception of her eyebrows: a very “serviceable” metaphor.
      Good luck with Mrs B (to be), btw.

  9. They’re called HD (Hi-Def) brows and yes they are fucking horrendous.

    My cousin is an eyebrow “Technician”….. Or she could be a nail “Technician”….. Basically a bimbo who bimbofies other bimbos.

    These daft Instagram-posing tarts genuinely think every bloke wants to fuck them…
    Not me – I like a nice, clean – looking, plain, nerdy bespectacled chick with a fringe and no makeup who looks like a librarian.

    • Is the beauty parlour your cousin works at called ‘Pretty Bitch’ or something equally pathetic?

  10. A girl in our office had these abominations on her brow ridge. Apparently girls have the eyebrows permanently tattooed on, hence their prominent appearance.

    I commented to trusted colleagues that she resembled the bastard love child of Gerald Scarfe and Dennis Healey.

    What a fucking mess.

  11. ……and when you tell them that they look like a complete cunt, they get all shirty……unfuckinbelievable.

  12. It’s all about equality. Ladies have found their equivalent of the hipster beard to make them look like cunts.

  13. On the subject of beards, I saw a bearded woman in the park the other day. A real one, not a transbender crossover cunt. They don’t seem to be as common now, when I was a kid there was a preponderance of these older, whiskery females. I don’t know what’s caused their decline but it was good to see that they are not yet extinct.
    A small ray of sunlight in the gathering gloom.
    Good morning.

  14. Allow me to offer my full support to this most worthy nomination, Cuntflap. Can it be that these grotesque, Co-Co the Clown embellishments have remained so long un-cunted?
    Throughout modern Western history (and indeed beyond this purlieu), trends vis à vis eyebrow “mutilation” have fluctuated between Marlene Dietrich’s equally egregious interpretation of the 1930s and, say, Brooke Shields’ “Dennis Healy” approach of the early 1980s.
    The current unfortunate and horribly widespread iteration is, I believe, due mainly to Kate Middleton, now Duchess of Cambridge. There is something of a tradition in the UK of mass emulation of the Royals from the Duke of Windsor’s tie knot in the 30s to this latest abomination.
    Roughly around the time of the engagement of Middleton to what’s his name(?) this hateful fad began to gain traction. By the time of the Ariane Grande concert attack, it was ubiquitous.
    I believe the current technique is called microblading. I particularly despise it, as my own girlfriend has succumbed to it; her 25 year old daughter bought her the “intervention’ last year as a birthday present. It cost £500 (including additional “top-up” sessions), and she was unable to turn her down.
    Fortunately, it is relatively subtle, but I am not happy at all.
    Fucking load of old pants.

    • Risking another soliloquy…

      Strange both Komodo and I used the word fad almost simultaneously. Mine just showed up 4 hours later. The last time “fad” appeared twice on a page was a 2015 Skrillex post, and then it was the same cunter who used it twice in one paragraph.
      OK– cunty eyebrows are a “fad” , but they’re also a “craze”, a “trend”, a “style”… ad nauseam. Together with his reference to plucked eyebrows (and mine to Marlene Dietrich) you have a proper cunt of a coincidence.
      I’m in all probability over-sensitive, having studied a lot of statistics at university.
      Bit different.

  16. Hadn’t noticed this extremely silly fad, probably due to my unmetropolitan location. Thank you for spoiling my day. Is there nothing wimminz will not do in order to look like cunts? And, a few years ago, didn’t they use to pluck their eyebrows precisely to avoid their looking like Saddam’s transplanted moustache?

    I give up. My mind boggled long ago – it’s permanent now.

    • Good morning, Komodo!
      Strange, I put up a comment around 8.45 in which I mentioned Marlene Dietrich’s eyebrow plucking, and used the relatively uncommon word “fad”.
      As it hasn’t appeared yet (09.10), I assume you’re either curiously on my wavelength / psychic or a mod.

      • You must be! Fad was used recently in Evolving Car Design, but otherwise it is an extremely rare word on the entire site. (Mostly “fad” is a suffix: fading etc).
        When/if my comment appears you’ll see my meaning.
        Together with my Marlene Dietrich remark, we’re entering morphic resonance territory! I think I may need to contact Rupert Sheldrake.
        Gd day

  19. Women have always been weird about their eyebrows (and most other things). I used to work with one that shaved hers off then drew them back on with a pencil. When I asked her why she didn’t just leave the eyebrows as they were she had a hissy and never talked to me again. Result.

    Can’t women see that plastic surgery makes them look like monsters and makeup makes them look clownish?

    Give me a plain Jane any day.

    Goodbye for now.

  21. Eyebrows plucked and drawn back on FFS says all you need to know.

    First one I came across had snared a friend with her slim cache of charms.

    All I saw was a plucked, grossly overweight, needy, wracked by hangups, with a dozen cats, living alone in a cat-piss-and-shit-stinking flat so cluttered that not a single horizontal surface was accessible to even put her car keys.

    “Mate”, we said, “trade up!”

    He did.

  23. They must have empty meaningless lives augmented by the fact their Marxist cunts of teachers told them they “were special” and its dawned that their not, so rather than improve their minds, paint on Groucho Marx eyebrows, tint their hair a dirty blue or pink and of course the now mandatory “individual” snot-hanger nose-ring. No wonder the birth rate has dropped, who’d fuck one of these self-entitled snowflake munters?

  24. Yep I was wondering, that as we put utterly forgettable nobodies with songs no-one will remember in Eurovision, why don’t we make ourselves memorable for any beauty contest.

    And here is the British Chav entry, in the spirit of equality and inclusivity and all the other shite: A grossly overweight moon_faced, nine-chinned, fat “trans” blob with coloured pink hair, stubble, painted on eyebrows, shaven themes, hoop earrings, snot-hanger nose-ring and various “edgy” tattoos such as “Women can have a cock” , “No Brexit”, “gender is a social construct”.

    If the freak doesn’t win, the Guardian, Corbyn etc can bleat about “transphobia” rather than address the obvious, that a pierced mentally ill whale is not, however you spin it “beautiful”

  25. Good cunting. It amazes me when some of them shave their eyebrows off…only to paint them back on again? Daft me…there was I, trying to drive around with square wheels on my car, when round ones would work pretty well.
    Why in the name of emulsioned cunt do these thick as shit girls would think this is attractive? It isn’t…not remotely. It looks like some drunken old cunt, squatted down over her at kip time and squeezed out two Guinness chipolata shits on her face. They look like black garden slugs.

    Silicone tits…not attractive…like two fried eggs on an ironing board. Trout-pouts…what a load of shit. Just makes them look like a spastic smacked in the face with a traffic cone. “You like my new pout?” “I’ve seen you on John Wilson’s Go Fishing series”. What a briefcase full of cunt.

  26. Spot on bit of cunting, Cuntflap. The bird in the photo looks like she’s got a garden slug glued to each eyebrow, the daft mare.

  27. I wonder if it’s, like, dawned on any of the witless cunts, that they, like, bear more of passing resemblance to Groucho Marx…like.

    See what I did there ?

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