Olivia Colman

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Olivia Colman’s a bit of a cunt, isn’t she?

Initially it was quite humorous seeing this funny-looking goon in productions but now the moon-faced ferret is in everything. It’s as if she’s cloned herself for every channel.

Who can forget her demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with the Northern accent in Peep Show? Or the demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent in Flowers? My favourite was the demented, wide-eyed screechy French woman with a Northern accent in Les Miserables. Now she’s up for an Oscar (who still watches this backslapping shitfest) for her role as Queen Anne as a demented, wide-eyed, screechy woman with a Northern accent.

However, she’s recently remarked how she feels “threatened” by losing her anonymity and now lives “like a hermit” since achieving fame.

Psh.

Colman, who starred in Broadchurch with that other portentous cunt David Tennant (who attended the Lifts-his-Right-Eyebrow Drama School) admitted that she rarely ventures out. “I have friends that I adore and I like going to safe places with them, my home or their home,” she said.

Yet another millionaire thesp “suffering” the pressures of fame. Listen chip-pan hair, if you don’t like the occasional little person kissing your arse, telling you they love you, and asking for a selfie then fucking retire! Nobody’s forcing you to appear in twenty shows a year. Christ on a skateboard! Start the clock on the “Trump man bad, Bwexit bad” gibberish. The only difference between you and any other whining, preening one-trick fucking pony is that you actually resemble a pony, you bug-eyed, bunny-toothed bore.

Nominated by Captain Magnanimous

51 thoughts on “Olivia Colman”

  1. A trifle harsh lol. This always happens. Someone appears in something that’s quite popular and successful, next thing you know they’re popping up everywhere until you’re sick of the fuckin sight of them. In a way you can’t Blame her, it’s the nature of the job, grab What you can while you’re still popular but one way to become unpopular very quickly is to over expose yourself . Tricky.

    • I agree Richard, and have no problem with anybody working hard. My point was that she says Yes to films, tv series, the opening of a fucking newsagent, anything, THEN complains of “the pwessures of fame…” as if she’s suffering.

  2. Another millionaire fronting charity adverts, expecting the skint to fill the begging bowl.

    I’d happily make a donation to people less fortunate than myself but there aren’t any….

    • I would have quite happily supplied her with some of my baby batter! But then the stupid bint started doing some chaaarrriiiiddddee Ads for pat Boones I think it was, since then my cock has hastily retreated back up into its cavity!

  3. Wasn’t she in a Volvo advert decades ago?
    Anyway, I am not aware of her telling me I’m a cunt for anything nor having a go at Trump so not bothered. Trump is a cunt but most comments are plain lazy bandwagon jumping. She is not in Cuntersnatch or Bonio’s league.
    Mostly spin through adverts so am not affected by cunts fronting charities for causes that are entirely down to the cunts who are suffering in one way or another – Africans, Muzzies etc.

  5. She is a fucking actress, of course where she lives people will recognise her, but I would think most people dont give a flying fuck.

    I have been in restauants and seen famous people, no one bothered them and why shoukd they, they piss and shit like everyone else.

    I have sat next to that bird from Eastenders, cant remember her name, the one who fucked her nose up with coke, that was in Murcia airport. I wouldnt engage in conversation with her as I wouldnt with any other ramdom cunt.

    This silly cow is far to far up her own arse.
    CUNT.

  6. What a luvvie. Yes she is a remoaner, spilled her guts to the Guardian. ( who else ? )
    “I didn’t know you were allowed to lie” she whines.
    Oh really? How old are you again bitch?

  7. These people make me wretch. Life is so comfortable yet they still whine. Please don’t mention that David Tenant talentless wimp, a pretender of an actor and a negligible wisp of a man.

    • Christopher Eccleston pisses all over Tennant’s Doctor Who… It was Tennant who helped it turn into the touchy feely scenery chewing over the top load of shite the series has become….

  8. She cannot go out She feels like a hermit.What a fucking shame She can stay in and count all her money my heart bleeds or better still donate some of it to one of the charities you keep punting on Sky you hypocrite.

  9. Coalperson was okay in Twenty Twelve and Fleabag… but apart from that she’s been everywhere for too many fucking years and after this well deserved cunting I hope never to see or hear of the self satisfied sow ever again. (ha, some hope! – Ed.)

    And Broadchurch was one of the most overrated waste of space pieces of shit of all time. The whole cunting series could have been edited down to an hour, even then it would have been too long.

    • Broadchurch – what an overrated colostomy bag of tv crap. Like a modern day Agatha Christie but without the humour and archetypes and drama and acting and interest and characters and subtlety and cleverness.

      Is it the shopkeeper?
      Is it the dog-owner?
      Is it ever going to end?

      Apparently they made a second series?! What the fuck happened in those ten episodes?

      Is David Tenant going to crack a smile?
      Is David Tenant able to lift his other brow?
      Is David Tenant a talentless no-mark?

  10. One trick pony like Sean Connery.
    Whenever I watch a film with Connery in, I see Connery, not the character he’s playing.
    And the same goes with this overrated irritation of a shit stain of a luvviee cunt.

  11. And she got twisty when some meejah entertainment writer proclaimed her as being 52 when she is in fact a mere 44.

    I think the entertainment meejah bod obviously just had a guess at her age (or was guessed by some cunt on WankiPedia so bereft of a life to actually create an Olivia Coleman page), and they thought they were being kind with their estimate!

    Another champagne socialist cunt crying about their 1st world problems of being rich and (moderately) famous.

    I have no time for them!

    —-

    And in other news…

    Q: When does an inoffensive, if not mediocre, and ultimately dull comedian become “groundbreakingly brilliant”?

    A: When they die!

  13. I know she’s a bore in the Syrian/water pleading, but she’s a decent actress.
    I thought she was good in Tyrannosaur and the brilliant Look Around You with Peter Serafinowicz.

  14. Actually… I thought she weren’t bad in this AA advert (2004).

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xsd2oOoXM9Q

    I’ll get my coat.

    PS: nice to see the comment auto-fill is back – the bit where we have to fill in our name and email address with every post. Hopefully not just a glitch in the system…

  15. I’ve met famous people, but the ones that were very limited in their appeal and timd in the limelight. When the subject arises, I often say to people ‘you know that Saracen from Gladiators/Andi Peters from BBC kids shows/ John Alford from London’s Burning?..
    ‘Oh Yeah?
    ‘He’s met me.’

    I once saw Dave Benson-Phillips at Chessington World of Adventures. I was impressed. But the coolest famous person i met was Pat Roach.

  16. Any moaning celebrity bores the tits off of me. Especially the very high profile, monied ones. Go and tell your mummy about poor little fame and fortune and not me, because I couldn’t give a fuck.

    These people want to me successful, want to ply their trade in a business that will (if they are lucky) involve them being on screen and inevitably papped and in newspapers and then when they reach those stellar heights they whine and moan about lack of privacy, the pressures of the spotlight and just how terrible it actually is to be earning all of that money.

    Oh just fuck off. When you are working 60 hours a week for peanuts in a factory, then maybe you will have cause to whine, but until then, shut your hole.

    This woman is indeed everywhere, so a valid cunting IMO. Frankly, I got sick of her right from the off when she was in that ‘Broadchurch’ bore. All of that ‘oh, she is marvellous in it’ shite got right up my ring. I didn’t watch it as I hate TV dramas and would rather watch paint dry, but my Mum was fixated and every other sentence between her and my sister was about that shite.

    ‘Random sinkhole, swallow me now,’ was my thought at such times.

    God only knows what will happen if she wins an Oscar. That will be my cue to exit the country, but it will have to be by stowing away inside a 747’s landing gear as I have no fucking money, but if needs must……..

    OVERRATED CUNT.

    • Nurse Cunty will you be our PM please?

      We need a genuine “Strong and Stable” woman in charge – as opposed to the “Weak and Rickety” bucket of piss we have now – like Maggie.

      Since her, the rest have been abject failures in leadership (whether you agreed with her politics or not) and we so desperately need a change after career politician fop, after career politician fop, and you’d get my vote Nurse Cunty.

      At the very least, if I win the EuroMillions and set up my Common Sense Party, would you be the leader?

      I’d pay you more than what those useless cunts in Cuntminster get – which is 10x more than they deserve!

      Cunts!

      • Do you know something, Rebel? That is quite honestly the nicest thing that anyone’s has ever said to me! I’m strong but I’m not so sure about stable, lol! I would definitely be interested in your Common Sense Party. That sounds like a bloody brilliant idea to me. Let’s be honest, we couldn’t do any worse a job than the shitheap parties that are loitering in parliament at present. I totally agree that those cunty bastards don’t deserve minimum wage, let alone their earnings.

        I would do it for free as well!! (Or at the very least, an infinite supply of tea and chocolate buttons)

        On second thoughts, scratch that. I’ve got a NEXT account that need a-payin’…….

      • Deal!

        And you’re right, a box of starving monkeys being tickled with back-scratchers, with only sea water to drink, would make more sense than 99% of the rabble we have in both houses currently!

  17. Off topic ….

    First conviction in the UK for FGM, fucking savages…. this woman originally from Uganda,
    Cut her 3 year old daughter
    Let’s embrace our multicultural Britain.

    Why the fuck do we have these cunts in the UK.

      • Only a matter of time I suppose we have had sheep molesters, donkey fuckers and who knows what else. Can anyone explain to me what enrichment our culture gets from a necrophiliac? But this sort of shenanigans has been going on for a long time hows about that then springs to mind; likewise undertakers benefits I kid you not. Fucking sick bastards one and all. Boiled in piss would be to good for them.

  19. Hmm. I tend to like most of the things I’ve seen her in. Except the advert for starving mtembes.

    But I did read an interview in the Graun where she came across as a right socialist luvvie. And she is over exposed as you cunts allude to above.

    • The King of remoan
      He’s never alone
      On and on they drone
      A bunch of cunts on the phone

      Hey, i’m a poet for fucks sake!

    • Pure bullshit in it’s most refined form!

      No cunt was remotely concerned about their being food shortages – and they were right not to be – until Remoaner cunts with a platform started to cry about it.

      No cunt was remotely concerned about their being medical shortages – and they were right not to be – until Remoaner cunts with a platform started to cry about it.

      No cunt was remotely concerned about martial law – and they were right not to be – until Remoaner cunts with a platform started to cry about it.

      So farmer boy here is crying about his subsidies going should we leave with a WTO “Hard Brexit” (nowt hard about it YOU CUNT) no deal.

      Well (YOU CUNT) have you not thought about how much money we’ll have in order to subsidise our OWN farmers with a “Fuck you EU! And you’re not having that £41 billion divorce settlement either! HAH!” deal? And the £11+bn a year thereafter?

      And if we do that, who’s going to pick-up that £41bn out of the EU coffers tab? Gerry has a lame duck leader and France’s leader is currently carrying about as much water as a broken colander! If the EU tried to tap those cunts up (again) for that shortfall then it will be civil war.

      So where is that money going to come from? Holland? Sweden? Not likely, and so all of the handouts the EU has been giving to the deficit countries dry up as well, and then it really is Goodnight Vienna for the 4th Reich!

      And then (YOU QUISLING FARMER HAND OUTSTRETCHED CUNT) who pays YOUR EU subsidy then?

      Why, no one! And then will you be crying that we should have come out on WTO so that you could have had some of that £41bn gravy and subsequent £11+bn gravy each year thereafter?

      You come across as though you know it all, when the reality is that no one knows for sure but – if you look at the economic trend of the EU for the last 15yrs – it’s spiraling downwards, and nearly failed after 2008 were it not for the Franco/German bail-out (and bankrupting Greece in the process and almost bankrupting Ireland, Portugal and Spain too)!

      The French and German peoples have no appetite for bailing the rest of Europe out yet again.

      It is a pity that this crying farmer cunt didn’t have someone on the leave side – with a few provable economic facts – to rebutt this guesswork and speculation. But that would be too easy – as that lickspittle O’Brien knows – wouldn’t it.

      Mòreover – farmer cunt boy – have you not thought about how much better your lot would be by NOT having to wade through rivers of EU red tape (in their protectionist racket) in order for you to sell your produce?

      Why, you may even stand a chance of turning a profit WITHOUT subsidies!

      And let’s face it, those subsidies are not for your benefit are they? No. They are for the benefit of the greedy supermarket franchises of Lord Sainsbury, Tesco, ASDA, et. al., who give you pennies but charge us consumers pounds – all in the aid of extortionate profit margins – which goes unpunished due to Cuntminster lobbyist palm greasing!

      If we leave then it can’t just be the farming side we deal with but also the (super) marketing side of it too and begin to hold those cunts to account for their complicitness in terrorising the (weak minded) people that the shelves will be empty.

      As WW2 proved, there’s lot of profit to be made from the threat of empty shelves isn’t there, you duplicitous, greedy bastard, profiteering CUNTS!

      • Well said Mr Rebel and fucking spot on. Just like these farmer cunts who cry that they can’t get their produce off the trees and out of the ground without two bob immo labour.
        So before the Eurotrash arrived did you leave it rotting in the fields? Pay a decent wage instead of sticking it in your fat wallets you cunts.

      • EU subsidies are paid for using UK taxpayers money. The EU has no money, it comes from the 6 NET contributors of the 28 members.

        The UK is the second highest contributor. It’s our own money! The EU gives us nothing. They keep selling themselves as this benevolent organisation, the truth is they skim a few billion off the top and then give us our own money back with their strings attached.

        Do you remember the stock piles of tinned steak the EU had, along with butter, cheese and other items stored away to keep the prices artificially high?

        Cuntage on an industrial scale.

      • Fine cunting sir. Fine cunting. Often think we should move into the mainstream so to speak. A great shame to waste the common sense and rational thinking abilities that the members of this noble forum posses. The fate of prophets to be derided in their own land as always.

  22. Fuck me she’s in the new British Airways advert How much money does this Cunt want ?

    • The pressures of fame are compelling her to make more money, George.

      “Waaa, people keep asking me for autographs and selfies, waaa.

      Yes, of course I’ll do the advertisement for Burger King, where do I sign?

      …WAAAA…”

  24. That overrated cake and eat it Colman bitch reminds me of a Shaun Ryder lyric…

    ‘I married a Horse… But now I’m filing for divorce…’

  26. My favourite was the demented, wide eyed screechy woman in Hot Fuzz.

    I’d still fire one into her though.

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