Oh, by the living toasted balls of Lucifer…here we go again. A cunting must be needed for the media and public overreaction to the coldish weather. Amber weather warnings and scaremongering literal snowflake news reports of “Ice Chaos” are coming in again. People have apparently already crashed on Britain’s roads due to ice and about 0.9mm of sleet on the ground at the time of writing this.
Other countries that have several feet of snow and the minus chart gets into two figures must be laughing their cocks and cunts off at us. A slight dusting of snow, and the entire country grinds to a halt, services stop, schools close, people start stockpiling groceries and fighting each other in scummermarkets as if it were a “Threads” style nuclear holocaust, people start stressing out on FaceFuck, Instacunt and Twatter about the so-called “crisis coming our way” and motorways will be blocked due to jack-knifed HGV’s making everyone’s day a cunt of exhibition grade quality. Fuck me in a pigeon-loft. Some HGV’s overturn if there’s a fucking banana peel on the carriageway.
No doubt the blue-haired personages of Neverland persuasion will be stockpiling food for their unicorns and the ginger right-on Rupert Bear hipsters will be stocking up on granola and beard-oil for the winter apocalypse that’s thundering our way. “This ice and snow deeply offends me”. Fuck off, you pixiedust cunt.
This isn’t the Sahara, the Bahamas or a known heat-level akin to the depths of hell? Haven’t sheeple in this country seen snow and ice before? Jesus on a unicycle, it’s the same situation every cunting year? Greedy, over-entitled, selfish and cuntish society. Welcome to the era of non-responsibility…and cuntitude. It’s winter! It’s supposed to be cold. For the love of Pete!
Nominated by Twatvarnish
The weather can be a cunt sometimes. I see it is minus 11 degrees in parts of the UK at the moment and fuckin’ 42 degrees where I live in Australia.
Thank fuck “Star Trek ” style teleportation is not here yet. We would be flooded with shivering Poms and you would be inundated with blistered Aussies. From the news it even seems it is going to get colder here and hotter in Australia in the coming weeks. Mind you, I’ll take the heat over the cold at any time.
Nominated by Grumpy Old Cunt