The Modern Man at the Bar

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Modern man at the bar

Took the mrs out last night to see some stand up and went for a post gig drink. There was a cunto (the collective noun for a group of men with sleeve tattoos and wanky haircuts) at the bar in front of me. No problem a quick order of five scoops and the cunto will be out of my way. But no one by one each of these twats ordered one beer for themselves and paid for it by card. Get a fucking round in you wankers. You are supposed to be mates but this behaviour just left me shaking my head. Left in disgust, went to another nearby pub, saw a middle aged colleague at the bar who just asked without hesitation what you having? He bought the mrs one as well. I of course returned the favour and we move on. Modern man at the bar get a fucking grip, get your cash out and buy a fucking round for your so called mates. They may then just do the same for you.

Nominated by Cuntsince1066

48 thoughts on “The Modern Man at the Bar”

  1. I try not to go out socialising , as everywhere is infested with cunts.
    It’s fucking diabolical.
    Good morning.

  2. What the fuck is a MODEM man? A cunt who radiates his cuntishness to all in range? The best typo in ISAC history. ( sorry admins, it was too good to miss, you do a great thankless job)

  3. Barely go out now, but cunts at the bar, Friday night, say four hand pulls, stout, bitter, weak, strong. Cue fucking discussion with beardy barman. Could I have a tasting? Block of wood, four glass holes. Two fucking hours later, yes the bright hoppiness hits you at first, I’m getting fuggles, long finish yes, the citrus and grapefruit elements are to the fore, fucking, coma. Look sunshine, on a Tuesday dinner time fair enough, just order a fucking pint for you and your mates eh.

  4. My fucking pub is full of wanky hipsters clogging up the bar glued to their fucking phones probably doing a Google on how to buy a round, along with reading up on a risk-assessment and that the round ticks all the virtue-signalling boxes, as they can’t be seen short changing one of their non-white colleagues with a half measure.

    Took a good 5 minutes before the wench behind the bar caught my eye. But during that time I could overhear these cunts talking about Strictly and I’m a Sleb for fuck’s sake!

  5. I’ll have to disagree with you there, Mr 1066. About 10 yrs ago I’d had a good day and decided to go to celebrate down at, what was at the time, the local. About 8 of the regulars were in there so I bought a drink for all of them as well. After they’d finished NOT ONE of them bought me one back. Suffice to say, I’ve never bought another round since.
    In fact I rarely go in pubs these days because:
    a) it’s too expensive (best part of £5 a pint)
    b) all you seem to find in pubs these days is a load of fucking arseholes who just want to dig you up and have a fight or ponce off you.
    I’d rather drink either at home or at a friend’s house. That way I’m actually having a good time with people I want to be with and it’s a lot cheaper. I really couldn’t give a fuck if every pub in the country shut down next week, because they all seem to have their little cliques and, if you’re not in one of those cliques, you’re made to feel very unwelcome.

      • Yes that’s where I encountered cuntishness of this kind.

        I found a decent (real ale serving) pub just off Tottenham Court Road and had a pint. I had a paper and parked my arse in the vicinity of “working” types, shunning the gaggle of “Hoorays” on the other side.

        Us workers just had a quiet sup while overloud bullshit exuded from over there.

        It was all “750 grand house” this and “80 grand” Porsche that. All materialistic cuntitude that made me immediately hate them all.

        So the bill came round – they had a tab (why I have no idea) – and it was about £50 for the 8 of them.

        Now up my way that would be £7 each and the change going to the wee lassy who was serving the insufferable cunts at their table but no, this bunch of wazzacks started to itemize the whole fucking bill into “who had what” and then 6 of the cunts then proceeded to pay their £5.75 or £6.50 by card. The girl must’ve been there 15 minutes (including failed retries on different cards). For fuck’s sake!

        Not only did the girl not get a tip, she didn’t get a thank you off any of the cunts either!

        When they fucked off one of locals (proper Londoner – not one of these faux city types), on our side shook his head and said: “Un-facking-believable mate!”

        I agreed, and having a northern monkey twang, he asked: “So where are you from?”

        Several exchanges of beer later I’d had a very good night with my newfound “savern” friend.

        😀

  7. Whilst on the subject of bars and cunts, was driving along yesterday with Mrs. Cunter and we were caught in slow moving traffic going through the town centre. Pulling to yet another stop ,my eyes idly wandered to the pavement ( scanning for twat , dirty old cunt ), when my gaze fell upon the largest woman I’ve seen in many a long year , twenty odd stone of blubber, horrendous ! I considered putting Mrs. Cunters ‘ Whale Song ‘ CD into the player and opening the window , to see if she reacted ,but traffic had started moving again . We came to a halt once more and fatty lumbered into view again , she stopped outside a butchers shop, her nose about an inch away from the glass. I just know she was drooling .The traffic starts moving again and we leave lard arse to her pork pie dreams , pulling to yet another halt , I notice a chap walking towards us, he looked as though he’d had a lifetime of regret and his face wore an expression that said ‘ I hate everyone ‘. I immediately thought, ‘ I bet he’s on ISAC ‘ Then I saw his lips moving, I could read them, he was saying ‘ fucking hell ! ‘ I followed his gaze , he was looking at fatty , who’d managed to drag herself away from the butchers ( probably after a few pies ), and was now squeezing herself through the door of
    Wetherspoons with great difficulty .
    The fat cunt.
    Pity the furniture.

  9. Nice platter of assorted knobcheeses that man-child has with his 1/8th of a pint. What a trendy bellend.

  10. I work in the local Spoons. Can confirm most of our patrons are chavs, obese cunts and hipster student cunts.

  11. I haven´t lived in the UK for decades and had forgotten about the system of buying rounds in pubs. I can´t believe I did that for years, knocking back five or six pints a night often followed by a Famous Grouse session at home. I hate to say it but maybe these tight-fisted, bearded, tattoed tossers with their moderate drinking habits who have never suffered from a hangover have got it right.

  12. Nah, can’t swallow this one. Buying rounds is ok if there are two, maybe three of you. But any more than that and you know some snide fucker is going to wriggle out of it. He comes out of the bog…….” just had a call, Mrs is on the warpath, gotta shoot, cheers.”
    Fuck that for a game of soldiers. Have you seen the price of a fucking pint these days? No, i’m with modern man on this one, buy your own fucking booze you cunts.

  13. I only like drinking in ‘old man’ pubs and have done since my early 20s. If one of my friends suggests a ‘bar’ I suggest they order a cocktail of bleach and thinners.

  14. Yeah I’ve noticed this sort of thing over the past couple of months….. A group were in front of me the other day at the bar doing the exact same thing after the second twat paid for his drink so I told them next cunt to “fackin get the round in you fackin mong and piss off out of the way” when they turned round they wasn’t expecting a 6’6 16st skin head….. So they paid for rounds after that

  15. Modern Man Cunt walking around the town, today, cold weather, everyone else in coats etc, this cunt’s walking around in a t-shirt, shorts and flip-flops. What an absolute unadulterated cunt he looked. At least his hipster beard kept his face warm.

    Why????

    • A few years ago Edinburgh citizens were puzzled by postmen who could be seen walking about in shorts and tee shirts in January, when ever other cunt was wrapped up in layers to avoid freezing to death. Turns out that in the summer, they’d formed a pool, chipping in a tenner each or something, and the one who went the longest in the outfit won, the daft cunts.

    • I have seen this fashion….example one bloke… During heavy snow walking around local street in flip flops, 3quarter length shorts…but wearing a fuckin duvet jacket..? What the fuck…similar annoying fashion bloke wearing T shirt…with a scarf..😬😬😬😬. Total twattitude…

  16. I remember many moons ago when I worked in a pub but it was a proper rough arse biker pub and often had hard rock music blasting out of the jukebox and this hipster wanker(yes they have been around much longer than you’d think) came in wearing a Motorhead t-shirt and generic sleeve tattoos(I don’t have an issue with tattoos as I have several myself but you could tell this was the sort picked from a chart) he ordered his beer and me being a barman decided to engage in a bit of chat as you do, as you expect in a pub so I just asked him “So do you know any Motorhead songs other than the Ace of Spades?” and he just looked at me and then nervously goes “well err… no… no I don’t” so he pays, grabs his pint and slinks off, polishes it off in 10 minutes and leaves. Soft twat.

  17. Yes. Spoke to a twat with a Ramones t-shirt and he hadn’t a clue who they were. Image and only image is everything to those types.

    • I’ve seen it so many times before, but what makes me laugh the most is that those twats have probably paid over the odds for their t-shirts just because some arsehole in a fashion magazine has said they’re trendy.

  18. Right, fuck it!

    I’ve got a thirst on now you cunts!

    See you after Tottenham/Barca match!

    Hic!

    • Is that a houndstooth jacket you’re wearing Dick ? Classy, timeless gentlemen’s attire.
      It makes me a bit sad seeing that clip, I used to know loads of pubs like that, now they’ve either gone or have been turned into cunt watering holes.

      • We genuinely do still have the odd pub like that up here. It’s the way that everyone stops talking and turns round to look if any newcomers enter that always makes me laugh. I’ve seen many a holiday-maker just turn on their heels and walk straight back out.
        Proper drinking pubs are dying out these days…just glorified eating-houses in the main nowadays. Smoking-ban,drink-driving laws and allowing children into the public-bar have seen to that.

        I do have several jackets in that style,must admit….they’ll never go out of fashion up here.

      • Nice to know there’s still some left. Used to go in one up there when we were jaunting round the area, The Wallace Arms outside Haltwhistle. Good atmosphere, dogs wandering around, etc.
        Last time we were in it was its last day before shutting.That’s a few years ago now, I don’t know if it’s been reopened.
        I hope it has.

  20. Was in Edinburgh last week 2 pints £9.80 ffs and one was fosters
    Will not be back
    Oh and they are all east coast cunts
    Edinburgh wankstains

    • Don’t even think of going to London then, CC, there is a much higher proportion of wankstains there (a bit like Cumnock) and the pints are £6 a go. Bunch of cunts.

  21. The worse thing for me at my local is cunts who order cocktails during fucking happy hour when there is only one staff member behind the jump.
    Fucks me right off that the inconsiderate cunts

  22. The guy in the picture is a cunt regardless of his drink buying procedure. I fucking hate hipsters.

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