Charity Ads
Give £5 a month for this, give £3 a month for that, and less often, a mere £2 a month for the next thing. Bollox to charity ads. The government should make sure that there is enough money for cancer research, living with cancer, guide dogs and whatever else these charities say are needed in this country. Note the word ‘needed’ and compare that to the money spunked on community art, yoof centres, faux road works etc. Fed up of these gimme money ads like I’ve time travelled back to Victorian times. The only ads that make me cry anymore are the animal ones and even they are proliferating and getting on my wick.
Yes I’m an old cynical cunt now.
Nominated by Cuntologist.
If its only £5 or £3 a month so little M’tebeh can finally get his village water pump and not have to trek eight miles to fill up a bucket of baboon piss then what the fuck is the foreign aid budget for? OK some of it is trousered by corrupt officials but a lot is spunked away on vanity projects like Zumba classes for empowered transgender pygmies battling climate change or some such bollocks. I give precisely fuck all to anybody, charity begins and ends at my front door.
35
The west has already given many billions to Africa in aid.
Despite this fuck all has changed. Still begging and wanting for more.
About time they got oftheir sorry asses, stopped having children and started to sort their lives out for themselves.
Foolish to continue giving more and more money if they can’t even be bothered to sort out the basics.
31
I bet you could relocate the populations of Europe and Africa (they have already started) and within a few generations Europe would resemble any despotic, violent Africunt shithole you care to name.
20
London already does.
17
Africa will never change because of barbarism, constant breeding, dictatorship, disease, religion and war. Billions of pounds squandered on a continent completely beyond help when that could have been spent sorting out, or at least going toward issues in this country. And these virtue-signalling celebrity bastards have the nerve to shed crocodile tears, holding Starvin’ Marvin up to the camera for dramatic effect, telling the likes of ME to hand over MY fucking money can go fuck themselves. If they care so much, they can put them up in their ivory towers they enjoy bellowing their liberal bullshit from. Bollocks to them, and bollocks to Mr and Mrs Click Click Derk.
13
Hence the petion on the UN migration pact,.the UK is being transformed into 3rd world theme park….
8
The UN migration pact needs its own cunting.
5
Yep and Africa is a pestilential despotic shithole. Now the cunts all want to come to Europe to recreate the paradise they left behind them over here. Fucking cunts
19
No. Only the fathers want to come to Europe. Their offspring and the mothers of said sprogs stay behind to support the cherridee industry.
2
On several occasions, I’ve noted the number down from one of those adverts that says ‘text food’, and I send them little emojis of chicken legs, bananas and loaves of bread.
14
That’s the point Willie – they don’t want to “sort” it. It garners too much brass and keeps the beatification train rolling along – Saint Jo Cox springs to mind. What really grates my gears is going to any one of the charities and examining their P&L reports. For instance – charity aid is part of a charitable group with SW1 offices and 180 permanent staff. The CEO is on £136k and salaries account for £4.5m. Now when you drill deeper down the money that is spunked on one off expenses like £33k for a womans workshop to explore ways in which women can avoid exploitation by their own menfolk (that’s just one of hundreds of “one offs”) in Mali. P&L spreadsheets are boring by their nature but it can give you a pretty good idea of how people can and have lived high off the hog from “just £3 a month will help…………….”. The charity aid board comprise of a group of directors that between them have over a 100 years of experience in charity organisations reads the blurb – and therein lies the whole reason for their existence – charity pays – and it pays well. For all the stick the old “Sally Army” gets its the nearest thing to honest charity out there – the rest are just regurgitating the old M’tebe has to walk 5 miles for the pot of wildebeest piss – it will never end – too many nice earners in it for those who dedicate their working lives to making sure M’tebe never quite gets the pump and the pipework in the village.
17
Bono can pay my 3 Quid. Or Geldof, or Leo DeCrapio or some other private jet owning billionaire cunt….
29
Its a fucking crisis of their own making (with a few exceptions) uncontrolled excalating birth rate, no infrastructure or economy to sustain this population rise.
A few quid for a fucking water pump isnt going to cure Africa, our foreign aid budget is 0.7 % of GDP, this is a massive budget, any money going into Africa should be stopped until the African goverments sort out their own houses.
CUNTS
24
Tell Mbappé that Tesco sell two bottles of Tonic water for a quid and it’s not even a mile away. Lazy bastard.
15
Another timely cunting for Charity and this time it’s the begging bowl ads.
I’s also like to add a sub cunting for those supermarket trolleys strategically placed just beyond the checkouts on the way to the exit asking you to donate to Kwambee’s fucking shitter or the like.
The barrage of this pile of cunt at Christmas time is a disgrace. Virtue signalling at its most extreme.
Come the New Year though normal service will be resumed and Charity Ads will be again confined to obscure daytime satellite TV channels and the Supermarket begging trolleys will scatter.
I guess we can all get sucked in though at this time of year and as such I’d like to twin my toilet with Ngobee and his clan.
That will fucking teach them.
7
The only thing worse than a charidee ad is a fucking charidee song…
There are loads of them this year and every one is even more shite than usual.
Another thing.
If m’tembe needs a well why doesn’t he go buy a fucking shovel.
…or make one.
Or why doesn’t his dad dig the fucking thing?
Give a man a fish and all that….
16
The attempts at guilt tripping just make me laugh. At Temple Meads rail station in Bristol there are currently posters all over the place urging folk to donate because apparently Female Genital Mutilation “affects us all”. What fucking brain donor cunt thought that one up and what was their reasoning. If some inbred cunts want to live in the Middle Ages I’d prefer it if they went elsewhere but until it starts happening to folk not of that ilk I give exactly zero fucks.
11
If people just give £5 a month towards mosquito nets. We could save millions of mosquitoes from dying of AIDS.
Thanks to Jimmy Carr for that one. The tax dodging, vampire looking CUNT.
15
Breaking news!!!
Spineless cunt Corbyn goes for no confidence vote on Mavis!!
I despise may but hope this chancer cretin gets wiped out!!
Unbelievably it’s all down to the dup!
Which way will they flop?
18
its just a fucking waste of time, he’s only attacking May so completely meaningless, he hasnt got the balls to go for no confidence in the government….
Labour say they want a general election, I dont think so, they are shit scared of a general election, no idea how they would stand on Brexit, they couldnt promise a referendum because they said that would only be a last resort if they couldnt get a general election…..
So what do they do, support brexit or support remain…. they are fucked!
Cunt
6
We are all being well and truly fucked over.
Our untrustworthy self centred useless cunt politicians have hand in hand with the bully boys of the EU made sure we are a complete laughing stock.
The EU is teetering on the edge, with what is happening in France, Germany, Italy, Hungary and Greece we must do everything we can to keep the pressure on the cunts in Brussels in charge.
9
Junker caught on camera staggering around pissed again. UBERCUNT
2
Labour is Alice through the looking glass. The party is riddled with Corbynites but Catweazle himself is shit scared of the pansy Blairites, and the likes of wobbly Dame Keir Starmer, and the absent Mandy and Blair, so has to mollify them like the prima donnas they are. McDonnell wants to stay in the EU but also wants to nationalise anything that moves – which the EU wouldn’t allow them to do.
Labour need a reality check – they are just as fucked up about Brexit as the Tories, but are too demented or too dishonest to admit it. Their party is also split just as much as the Tories with their divisions. Our only hope in an election is UKIP lets face it, and even that is fucking divided like the other two. Bastards!
3
Think UKIP made a major error when they associated themselves with Tommy Robinson.
Whilst I agree with some of the things Robinson says, and am appalled how he has been treated by those who want to shut him up he should never have been allowed anywhere near UKIP.
Result being Farage and others resigning thereby weakening support and losing Farage followers, like myself.
Until a new centre right pro Brexit party is established cannot see any party has what is required to lead the country.
5
DUP wouldn’t touch Corbyn with a barge pole. They’ll vote down May’s Brexit sellout deal alright, but won’t go against May or the Government in a vote of no confidence. Last thing the DUP want is a IRA /Gay Marriage lovin’ Corbyn /Flabbottomus administration.
Corbyn’s just demonstrated what a thick inept cunt he is.
14
The directors and senior managers of these charities earn £100k upwards all from the front line in London. Save the Children’s senior pay rates are eye watering and most charities are at that level except the Sally Army. Charity is an industry and a gravy train home and abroad, especially Africa.
Give £5 per month and perhaps 5 pence will go to Umbongo. However, some well connected cunts will live the fucking high life with the rest.
9
We give all this money to Africa, fuck knows where it all goes. Not that it makes any difference because the ungrateful cunts over there still hate us for being their colonial masters all those years ago.
And all this libtard cunts get on my nerves: they moan when the UK doesn’t get involved in foreign conflicts, especially in Africa; and then they moan again when we do!
Why should the ordinary cunt in the street donate a fiver a month for an ungrateful cunt in Africa? Why can’t those rich celeb cunts put their hands in their pockets and cough up rather than stashing their millions on tax-havens and generally wiggling out of their commitments serving this country (And yes I’m looking at you Linecunt, Lilly Mong, the Beckhams et al)
Fucking premier league footballers earn anything up to £600,000 per week – basic! Why can’t they chip in?
Fuck ’em all!
17
I reckon when the charities and cameras disappear, they vacate the mud hut / corrugated tin shack and all fuck off to a 5 bed detatched with a Merc parked on the drive. They’ve had enough money to do so…they’re mugging us off….
What do you call an Ethiopian on hunger strike.?
.
.
An Ethiopian….
10
No……
….a showoff
6
David fucking Milliband revived a 23% pay increase this year taking his salary at the hilariously named International Rescue to…….
£646,710.
How the fuck can any cunt running a charity or most businesses for that matter justify that level of remuneration.
Fucking disgraceful.
23
Sickening.
By law a charity should have to make sure that 95% of the money donated ends up where it’s supposed to.
I recon they’d still find a way of creaming of it though. …. theiving shameless greedy cunts!
9
This is precisely why ordinary folk should tell these charities to fuck off and do one!
What an absolute cunt! Has he no shame at all?
Fuck him, fuck International Rescue and fuck all the usual multinational charities, some of whom probably have investment portfolios in the arms and pharma industries.
I’d rather donate a tenner a month to my local PDSA than those despicable fuckers.
7
Hopefully it will put the oily little motherfucker off the idea of crawling back to British politics like greasy worm he is.
6
I too am a softie for animal charity ads – I am not a cat lover but I felt quite choked when I saw the recent Cat Protection one, but some of the others – especially the one where Eddie Mary Izzard in half drag campaigns for starving kids does my head in. wouldn’t piss on him if he was on fire.
When – and I hope when – we leave the EU, and there is no chance of Anthony Blair becoming the next Juncker I am looking forward to the charity ad for him:
Music: From Handel’s Messiah:
“Hi duckies. My name is Peter Mangledbum. At this very moment a lonely broken old man faces the future, in despair, down to his last few million pounds. He doesn’t know where his next bung or Botox injection is coming from, let alone his next commission from a dictator. Please help him in his hour of need. Just £10 a month will help him to get back on his feet, to pay for his counselling for addiction to self-promotion, and delusions of grandeur, and expensive champagne, and help him to support his grieviously ugly wife, now too raddled and incontinent to prostitute herself, and their greedy poncing off-spring. This man has nobody to turn to, no job, no purpose and yet still with a family and a hernia to support. Give £10 by texting 01234567 with the word CUNT. The Adonis project thanks you for your lack of comon-sense.
14
I would like to nominate the following as the “bizarre comment of the day” (taken from a poster on the BBC news website May announces MP deal date).
“Idea: If Tony Blair was made EU commissioner – he’s got the know-how – we’d have British leadership at the top of the EU and then that might win over brexiters. We could remain while having that Birtish sense of self-control that brexiters are so obsessed about”.
Some people just don’t get it (or anything else in all likelihood).
And Remoaners have the fucking nerve to call Leavers uneducated and thick.
11
The Leave vote has to be upheld – Remainers didn’t know what they were voting for. 😂
11
Nicely put Mr Creampuff.
As the vast majority of crass, childish, insulting and incorrect quote comments I read come from Remoaners I am convinced that you are right.
Thick deluded cunts
5
I have always believed the real reason that Blair, Mandy, Adonis and all the little Westminster queers plus the “Tory” Labourites like Clarke and Heseltine are so anxious to stay in the EU is so that Britain’s most corrupt politician Blair can make his pals even richer, like the Gina Millercunt and Dick Branson.
2
Tony agrees with you…or did in April 2004…
“If the British people vote no, they vote no. You can’t then start bringing it back until they vote yes.”
“If the British people vote no in this referendum, that is their verdict. That is absolutely clear.”
Cunt Blair, promising a referendum on the EU Constitution (which he didn’t deliver)
7
Nice one Komodo.
4
I live in a suburb of Leicester. It has running water already but it costs around £300 a year. When I can get my water for £3 a month I might consider giving a donation to Africa.
8
Fuck me Moggie63
Sounds like a bargain.
Paying nearly £600 for water and sewerage in Ipswich.
4
Fuck me Willie. What comes out of your taps? Champagne? Caviar?
2
I lived in Blackpool a few years ago and £600 was about what I was paying there, but I now have a water meter here and, since it’s just me and my wife, our usage is quite low. Phenomenal difference.
1
Went into my local Spar on the way back from work today to get a loaf of bread… The queue was held up for an eternity by some Bogo-Bogo cunt wanting to pay his electric, gas, and every other fucking thing… Thing is the bird behind the till couldn’t understand a word the cunt was saying… Fuck them all….
15
Everything takes so much fucking longer than it used to.
Multiculturalism simply does not work.
Please can we put an end to it.
17
I was waiting at my doctor’s reception counter last week while an eastern European feller was helping another eastern European feller register at the practice. I walked out after five minutes. It looked like they were going to be there all day.
1
Fuck me I had the same thing in a Joe Daki shop earlier. Some Iron Curtain fucker trying to send 200 Euros to some shit hole. I walked out and went somewhere else.
Cunts.
2
Just walked out of McDonalds. Only wanted a fucking coffee. Some Eastern European concentration-camp-alike (who could barely string 2 English words together) trying to order food from a Khan-alike (who could barley string 2 English words together). Loads of Idi-Amin-alikes hanging around in the back of the shop examining their shrunken head photos on their phones doing FUCK ALL as usual. Cunts.
4
Stroker we are royally cunted. Unless you are a non raculist we are cunted big style.
Cuuuuuunttts
2
Malthus was right but discredited. It is as nature intended that the surplus population decreases. Pity snowflakes and simpletons prevent it.
4
Aha, but they don’t prevent it. Subscribe to the appropriate bleeding-heart animal charity and you too can support the reintroduction of threatened top predators into areas of human overpopulation.
Komodo Global Charidees LP ™ is currently negotiating a franchise for ‘Leopards for London’, to be launched in the New Year.
(100% of your donations are safely and responsibly administered in an invisible Cayman Islands hedge fund )
0
Charities begging for money to help whatever cause and then pay their staff a fortune, make adverts to scam some more and then handover a small portion of the money raised to the so called intended recipients……..them cunts?
There are some good charities out there but a lot of people make a very comfortable living hiding behind charity status.
Kids company anyone?
5
You’d have thought with all of the billions – if not trillions – of aid over the last 40yrs or so they’d all be driving Ferraris by now???
But no, same old starving kids, flies shitting in their eyes, drinking bison piss out of a puddle…
Charity hasn’t made a dent in their problems and nor will it until they stop giving money straight to Government agencies (to piss away on Chief Bolo Bolo’s 5th Silver Ghost Rolls Royce, or arms to keep the despot cunt in power), and administer aid directly (again so Chief Bolo Bolo doesn’t annex it to SELL to the people who need it).
So – unless the charity is for compulsory sterilisation after they have 2 kids, both mother and (if you can find the cunt) father – then I couldn’t give two shits.
In fact I’d pay real money to have mercenaries sink Soros funded NGO ships and lay an embargo for the Lilo mob setting off towards Spain (the new nearest point for fighting age, sub-saharan men to descend).
Well done Spain, for fucking your own over for that pile of uneducated, dependent trash!
Still, the Vox party is doing nicely because of it!
Nah fuck charity, whether home or abroad, unless I know exactly where it’s going (local hospice, etc.), then they can all fuck off!
Cunts!
11
This is what i say about charadeees, they are for sure lying cunts, a good few years ago the company i worked for were asked make up small sachets of water, it had to be harmless but look like it had been scooped up from some shity water hole in africa, these sachets would then be sent out with the usual begging letters for water aid…. makes you laugh dun it!
5
How about we get our own house in fuckin order before we send charity to a bunch of fuckin pat Boone’s who hate us anyway ? Fuck them! I’m no fuckin lefty but let’s look after our own first. FOOD BANKS fuckin FOOD BANKS, sorry, I thought we were one of the richest countries in the world? What the fuck is that all about? When we’ve got our own house in order….. You know what they can still get fucked! Fuckin foreign aid can fuck off and the celebs that endorse this shit , you empathise with them so much well fuckin shit off and live over there with them you fuckin CUNTS
8
Totally agree, my thoughts entirely.
The other day when May stood up in parliament and was saying that the number of people using food banks was down FFS.
Why in the 21st century in one of the richest countries is there the need for anyone to use a food bank?
Put British people first every time.
6
Pat Boone’s. Brilliant!
2
Charity ads seem ever increasing these days and they annoy the arse off of me, predominantly as so many of them use celbricunts to try to beg money out of people. Let those fuckers donate. They can fucking afford it.
The bosses of these things also get megabucks to undoubtedly do fuck all, while all of their little weavels are getting the begging bowls out and doing the actual graft. This time of year these ads are so very cynically ramped up too, like we are being guilt tripped into donating because we will all be having such a very commercial, jolly old Christmassy time while some African kid is sucking nutrients out of a packet.
The best aid that they could give to the Third World is contraception. This is something I have been droning on about for years. THEY NEED TO FUCKING STOP PROCREATING, only to bring a life into this world that is probably born to die from malnutrition. The wealthier have education and access to birth control……the poorer DON’T. That is what charities should be funding, not trying to put a plaster over an eternally bleeding wound.
I gave to charity many years ago when my income was better (and I was far less cynical,) but I also find with these fuckers that when you have given a one off donation, they NEVER leave you alone. It is a constant barrage of begging letters and asking you to set up a direct debit or leave them something in your will. They just bite the hand that feeds and piss you right off so you never donate again. I call that ‘shooting yourselves in the foot,’ fuckwits.
(As far as a will goes, they’d be out of luck with me, unless they want a ‘Now that’s what I call music’ album from 1985 and a framed photo of my cat, Del boy.)
CUNTS.
6
The largest slice of the UK foreign aid budget goes to Pakistan. Makes you think that someone is being hypocritical when China is admonished for not taking into account the wrongs of the ruling powers when China pours millions into some African country, at least they get more than an endless stream of benefit claimants, rapists, drug dealers and do it yourself back garden butchers. By Jove sir we are being royally fucked.
3
The only charity ads that stir the slightest emotion in me are the ones for rescuing donkeys from the third-worlders too thick to realise they need to look after their animals to get the best out of them.
People having to carry water a mile is just cultural backwardness. They couldve had ot on tap if we run the place.
4