Black Friday [4]

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BLACK FRIDAY is the ultimate post modern, neo liberal guardian reader snowflake CUNT yet also capitalist! How can any cunt hit so many bases simultaneously!? No, I don’t want 20% off writing paper for my fucking email address or a hotel room for £20 more than I usually pay and yes, ametican websites I know it’s thanksgiving but the icky thing I truly give Thanks for is that I don’t live in your country because it is also a cunt – but I’ll get on to that later.

Nominated by maurice potts

15 thoughts on “Black Friday [4]”

  1. A well deserved cunting. Please do know It won’t last long anyway. It will be racist this time next year.

  2. Black Friday only benefits dole scum. If you’re not on the doorstep of the store as it opens, then you lose out. The rest of it, especially the online stuff, is just smoke and water to make thick people think they’re getting a bargain. I love the videos of darkies fighting over TVs though. Fucking boons.

    • It’s great. Don’t have to spend anything. Just go online and watch free clips of dregs scrapping over items like a bunch of starving animals.

      It could be improved with more gunfire I think though. Not enough carnage.

    • Absolutely; that’s why it’s called BLACK friday- coz come 6 o’clock, Skycunt news will be full of grainy mobile footage of unemployed hoodie-wearing fuzzy-wuzzies fighting over a few flatscreen TVs, while their fat, Flabbottesque “women” scream and chatter from the sidelines like some fucking PG Tips advert. I thought they were against all this “cultural appropriation” business anyway- so where the fuck are you going to plug that in in a mud hut, Sambo?
      Utter cunts, the lot of them, and thoroughly deserving of a seperate cunting themselves.

  3. The amount of incomers over here now makes it black monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday,Saturday and fecking Sunday. This comment is obviously racist but never mind.

  4. I bought 2 lots of button batteries this morning from eBay for £1.88, that’s my Black Friday shopping complete.

  5. Black Friday couldn’t be more aptly named though… Mate of mine is a security guard at the Trafford Centre (I hate the fucking place), and he says Black Friday there looks like a charge from Zulu Dawn, and he doesn’t mean an attack from the Welsh Guards…

  6. Another fucking American cultural import that nobody needs. Hopefully some cunts with an architectural background will stab the fuck out of each other fighting over a discounted telly.
    Something to look forward to. 😃😂🤣😁

    • Now that we’ve had Thanksgiving and Black Friday, we can look forward to leaving the EU and becoming America’s 51st state.

  7. Morning all
    Great cunting maurice. As Freddie says, it’s just another worthless piece of Yank cunt brought over here in an attempt to part punters from their cash. Bag o’ fucking shite.

  8. Black Friday had been about since the 17th century.
    In Australia and Africa they used to have bargain slave auctions on the second Friday of December every year. Aborigines and blambos used to be sold at a knock down price to show that all slave drivers weren’t complete cunts.
    It was very popular in its day. You could also buy one at a set price and get another one free. There was also 20% knocked off the price if you bought in bulk of ten or more slaves. You had to return the iron shackles and chains otherwise you would have to pay a 10% surcharge.
    True story.
    Honest.

  9. Fuck Black Friday, a nod of thanks to B&W Cunt who sorted me a 48′ Sungsam flat screen and a bottle of KoKo Chantelle No 5 1/2 for the Mrs. If anyone asks he knows nuffin abaaaaat it.

  10. Soon to be renamed “Day of Colour, Friday” so as not to cause offence to the usual wanky suspects.

  11. I think a Non-Retail Day is well overdue. An opportunity not to be coerced into buying shit you don’t need. Sometime in Lent, I guess, would be good. Stores required to give away anything ordered on that day for free, or close. Advertisements banned on the media. I will accept alternatives, but I like the sound of St. Komodo’s Day.

    Local greengrocer’s a bit of a social centre, and has all-day television. On which, interspersed with Black Friday ads and a very old film*, an elderly cricketer – either Botham or Boycott, I’m not a cricket devotee – was today enthusing about some Technology alleged to cure his old legs apparently by vibrating them into functionality. It’s really gone too far now.

    *I didn’t enquire. Shot of John Wayne with a giraffe in a crate. Should be identifiable.

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