Nice to see an old 18th Century style orf retribution still orn trend amongst ex-pat villains in Spain. If the geezer is feeling generous you might get the old Newcastle Nod first but wether you wake up orn the beach orn in horspital it will hurt. Now this is not your normal glassing but a De Sade refinement orf same wherebye slits are made in the corners of the mouth and upwards and the punter made to scream by bottling his bolloxs or glassing his arse. Other variations are available. The slits are thus ripped open as the punter opens ‘is mauf.
The genious orf it is a clever brief and a judiciously bribed judge will get the charge doine to a slap orn the wrist, a minor assault rather than GBH. The punter was only given two little nicks and the rest is doine to him. Should ‘ave kept ‘is mauf shut see. Poetic in its way.
Nominated by Sir Limply Stoke
There are some things I just don’t want to know. This beggars belief and is far over and beyond being a cunt. The bastards want burning for eternity even if the bloke lured was a woofter. If a paedo then well done.
13
Must have had an affair with the top villains gran or 13 year old daughter for that torture.
Jesus Christ had it easier than that poor bastard.
9
Who Do You Think You Are Sir Limply? Lulu. Her great grandmother a matriarch of the Orange Lodge. Daughter married Irish Catholic immigrant with his badge of honour- the Glasgee smile. Ne’er do-well. Mother and daughter never wholly estranged. Buried together in the Protestant part of the cemetery. Made me smile.
6
Has Sir Limply over-refreshed himself before this nomination? I am not sure who the cunt is supposed to be. The inflicter or the inflictee?
I’m not sure he knows either…
10
Come,come Paul. I’ll admit that this one lacks the gravitas of some of Sir Limpley’s previous Cuntings…”Diseased Horse-Prongs”, “Piles”,and my personal favourite..”Spontaneous Human Combustion”,but I still think that it fits perfectly into Sir Limply’s back catalogue of bizarre Cuntings…..and I’m quite sure that he was as sober as a Judge when he composed them all…..Now,when’s the next Deadpool? I’m thinking of making some changes to my selections.
🙂 .
3
Maybe we should start a new thing, and call it ‘Arthur .C. Clarke’s Mysterious Cunts’?….
4
I wonder if it’s known as a “Glasgee Smile” because of the sunny disposition of Glasgee natives? After all,they’re well known for grinning like Cheshire cats to show off their gleaming,full set of Pearly-white gnashers as their laughter-lined faces ooze the bonhomie with which they greet their English guests…..yep,that’ll be it.
12
The Sicilian Necktie has that beaten by a mile or two.
3
No fucker says Glasgee for fucks sake. Its Glesga ya southern softie ponses.
6
In Albanian gaols, prisoners are forced to contact relatives and pay money to the gangsters outside. This is done by having unshelled boiled eggs placed in their armpits then having their arms clamped shut before pleading to pay.
1
I recall tales of the ‘Chelsea Smile’… A very unpleasant pastime practiced by the infamous Chelsea Headhunters at the height of 80s hooliganism….
Which sort of reminds me of the story I heard about a certain Noel Gallagher… Noel and his brother, Paul, went down to Wembley to see Man Shitty play Chelsea in the 1985 Full Members Cup Final (Ha fucking Ha!)… The two Gallaghers came across some of Chelsea’s firm, promptly crapped themselves, and never went away with the Berties again… Noel now cracks on he was one of City’s notorious ‘Young Guv’nors’. but he is a lying cunt… That 85 meeting was the only time he even came remotely near to any action… And he shat himself then, the bullshitting bitter blue cunt…
2