Big oyster trivia

Posted on by

How about this cunt:. The It’s the Biggest Oyster Found in New York in 100 Years.

So Big is a metaphor for New York City itself — which, as the author Mark Kurlansky explained in his 2006 book, “The Big Oyster,” had another nickname before it was the Big Apple. By some accounts, in the 17th century, New York Harbor held half of the world’s oysters. The city was filled with oyster stands before there were hot-dog stands or food trucks. A 12-course dinner in 1842 for Charles Dickens — who characterized old Ebenezer Scrooge as being as “secret, and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster” — began with oysters, glorious oysters.

Big is a New Yorker, which means that Big is a survivor. Big survived being pried loose by a diver with the construction crew repairing Pier 40. Big’s people say dislodging an oyster is difficult; oysters attach themselves to objects underwater with cementlike inviolability. What happened to Big must have been traumatic, but was also its salvation. The construction workers “knew if they let it fall to the mud on the bottom, it wouldn’t survive,” said Toland Kister of the River Project.

The workers also knew Big wouldn’t survive the rest of the project, which will involve, in effect, power-washing the pilings and encasing them in cement, Mr. Kister said.

“It’s not as if people are diving down there to look for oysters all the time,” Mr. Kister said. “These were construction workers with a job to do, and it’s not research.”

Big’s people consider Big special, but they hope Big is not too special. “This oyster could be unique,” Mr. Kister said. “It could be the only oyster that was down there like this, but it would also be really, really cool if it wasn’t the unique thing down under there.”

Dr. Siddall said Big brought to mind oysters the size of dinner plates that were harvested from the Gowanus Creek in Brooklyn from the 1600s to the time of the Revolutionary War. “There was some dredging that was permitted in the late 1700s,” he said, “and after the dredging, the oysters were still abundant, but they were smaller.”

o how old is Big? Mr. Kister said the oyster could have been living on its piling for seven to 15 years — “which is a big spread.”

Dr. Siddall, after looking at photographs of Big online, said that 15 was probably on the low side. “I’m prepared to be more liberal in my estimate,” he said. “It’s probably twice that age.”

But Big could be even older, Dr. Siddall said.

“I was born in 1966,” he said, “so it could be as old as me, and I’d like to think that it is. It would be really reassuring if that were true, for both of us.”

What an oversized cunt.

Nominated by CaliAngel

56 thoughts on “Big oyster trivia”

  1. A strange cunting. We know nothing of Big’s politics or affectations. Does he think Trump’s a cunt? Does he favour trigger warnings, safe spaces, no-platforming and petting dogs in place of intellectual questing and debate? Does the fucker subscribe to #metoo bullshit or maybe he is a sexual predator.
    I think we should be told.
    I cant, with a clear conscience support this cunting of a possibly reasonable and decent bivalve mollusc.

  2. But not the biggest cunt found In New York for years, because the place is fucking full of them.. Apart from Paris (what’s left of it that been hasn’t turned into Pakistan or Zimbabwe), the so-called Big Apple is the biggest hive of most self important and pretentious cunts in the entire world…. No wonder Yoko Fucking Ono lives there…

  3. I’ll cunt this little bastard. Of all the things in all the world I’m quite severely allergic to this little (“Big”) maritime cunt flap. Ingesting one once really took the shine off my honeymoon as my throat swelled and my heart rate went from couch potato to 100 meter runner in about 9.25 seconds. Kill em all.

  4. I’ve never eaten oysters,but I did have an Iceland frozen fish-pie for my dinner once…eaten considerably fishier tasting hairy-pies to be honest.

    • Well Dick,
      There’s only two things that smell like fish and one of them is fish. I made a real cunt of myself at a dinner in San Francisco entertaining perspective clients at Scoma’s on Fisherman’s Wharf (from Pier to plate was its tagline). I had flown in late, was fucked after a week driving from the North West to London and up to Scotland and then back home again, picked up a bag and flew from Heathrow on the Saturday morning. There was a mixture of male / females, some techy and some from the business. They were investing £5m (it was Vodaphone) in product and licences and it was the biggest we had had for FY2001. The food was excellent, the wine more so. Someone had ordered Dungeness crab and a few seafood medleys for starters and one of the females remarked that it smelt a little “off” – quick as a flash cuntface here declared in one sentence (I swear to God I was possessed for that one moment) only 2 things smell like fish and one of them is fish. Stunned silence until one of our Buss Apps specialists pulled me out of the shit after one of the US contingency had asked “what’s the other”? She deflected it wonderfully with a remark about the Thames on a dry day and that was it – embarrassing moment over – back to the crab and wine. Yes, we got the order too 😉

      • Ah yes, it was either them or “Fanny Batter Minge” but they were a grunge band weren’t they.

      • You frequent that joint too Kriddler? Well I’ll be doggone! I’m the guy in the leather peaked cap – can only presume you’re one of them pretty twink chickens that come in real regular like.

      • Well once the Village People stopped playing there I stopped going.

        The Indian – sorry – Native American, gave a mint reach-around wank!

  7. And in other news.
    Welsh MP Guto Bebb (me neither) has called for a second referendum. He represents a Leave constituency of course but ‘knows better’.

    • He is bound to know better its in his DNA as a remain seeker, he and his kind are super intelligent superior minded cunts who thick feckers like me will be eternally grateful to, for pointing out that we didn’t make the right choice. C U N T S.

  8. I started reading Dickens’ ‘A Tale Of Two Cities’, beliving it to be about the rivalry, between two provincial newspapers….

    “It was the Bicester Times, it was the Worcester Times”….

    Coat already on, cab on its way….

  9. Come acrorss Guto as a forename or foreskin with these druidical cunts before although by the look orf all the pie bellies in that God forsaken piss’ole orf weak warm welsh bitter beer it should be spelled Gutto. As to cunting oysters, and a fucking pretentious overlong bit orf cunt prose at that, nothing like a dodgy fucker to cement a stout Englishman’s arse to the khazi. Admin must be scraping the bottom orf the barrel to post that and attract all the ex Cunt’s Corner bottom feeders up from the slime to hoover over it. It’s a bivalve mollusc that feeds by filtering shite now fuck orf.

  11. Truth, if truth were needed that the blambo cunts will one day wipe out mankind with their filthy fucking jungle habits of fucking primates and bringing new strains of every virus under the sun as well as scamming the populace with tales of Uncles who were big in the oil industry and if only we will pass on our bank details we will be given £4m.
    The first case of “Monkeyvirus” (I shit you not) has been recorded in the UK after a Nigerian National had stayed at a Naval base in Cornwall (I guess that will be Culdrose). Dirty, filthy horrible smelly pox ridden blambo cunts. Have blambos ever given the white man anything worth having?
    https://www.aol.co.uk/2018/09/08/first-case-of-monkeypox-recorded-in-uk/

    • “It does not spread very easily BETWEEN PEOPLE.”

      In more ways than one, I guess that just about sums it up.

  12. Help! I am at my socialist brothers birthday party. His girlfriend warned me it would be full of lefties…

    They met at the local Labour party.

    I NEED SOME SEMTEX, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!
    My fat activist Palestinian loving, in the closet, niece will be here soon.

    TNT will do, I am not fussy…..

    • You poor fucker Krav,
      You have my utmost sympathy. I wouldn’t need semtex or TNT. A broken bottle is most effective – in the windpipe and turned 90 degrees. My other advice would be DONT drink – my gizzard just wont fucking stop if I have had ale and I have lost relatives (as in they don’t invite me round again) due to political differences. Don’t believe that blood thicker than water bollocks – you can choose your friends, sadly you are saddled with family. I can just about manage a despatch with my cuntish family – the hatch and match are off the calendar. My youngest Brother got married for the second time to the goat he had lived with for a decade and sent me a message saying he would love to see me at his nuptials. My reply was typically short and to the point. Fuck off. Ex bootneck (Royal Marine) – never liked the cunt even as kids. I had him ducking for apples one Halloween night and I swear to God if my mother hadn’t ripped my foot off the back of his head allowing him to breathe again it would have been a real score.

      • Thanks for the moral support! Regretfully I don’t drink. Just been introduced to the editor of a well know left leaning national paper: I FEEL VIOLENTLY SICK.

        My hatred for Socialism and all it stands for is impossible to encapsulate into words.
        Smug, beer in a bottle swigging middle class overpaid high maintenance triggered cunts.

      • I’m drinking beer from the bottle at this precise moment (Mmmm! Adnams!)and I’m not middle class or overpaid (sadly) or high maintenance and certainly not a socialist.
        Are you wearing your best Big Don T-shirt especially for them Krav?

  15. The rare viral infection does not spread easily between humans and most people recover within a few weeks.

    Public Health England (PHE) said the patient was a resident of Nigeria where the virus was probably contracted.

    Probably not fatal but have had enough of the “benefits” of cultural enrichment to last a lifetime.

    Monkeypox. Black people. Bit racist.

    • Apologies, should have had the following headline

      Monkeypox diagnosed in UK for first time

  18. Tried watching the proms.Fed up with the European and Pride flags and even the bustard singing rule Britain’s pulled out the Canadian flag.It is incidentally the most Un diverse audience you will ever see on the BBC. load of stuck white metropolitan elitist liberal wankers.

  19. Sweden’s Prime Minister Stefan Lofven has begun the final day of the general election campaign by warning about extremism and fascism. That would be any anti immigration supporters, otherwise now known as the “right wing”.

    Mr Lofven said an SD vote was “dangerous” and “counterproductive”. He said it was “like trying to quench fire with alcohol”, according to the Omni news site.

    Another deluded EU supporting prick, this time a Swedish prick.

    • Sweden is a liberal cesspool.Thank God the people of Sweden are finally going against the globalist project which has already lead them down a path of liberalism that seeks the Islamisation and ethnic replacement of its own native citizens.I think the Sweetish Prime Minister should look at the fascism of Islamists.Anti gay anti animal welfare anti trans anti women anti Liberal independent judicieries anti white anti European anti West and anti free speech.That is what sounds fascist to me.

    • This Sweetish can’t is like Gordon Brown when faced with losing the argument resorts to the “bigoted woman” line or Hillarys “basket of deplorables” to blame his horrible voters for turning against him.In other words I am right and the plebs are nasty racists who are in the wrong.

  21. Serena Williams

    What a nasty unsporting bad loser bitch.

    Said she wasn’t cheating and that her coach was not coaching her. He has admitted that he was.

    She called the umpire a thief and implied he was sexist. Surprised she did not play the race card.

    Stick to advertising fucking mattresses in future you daft cow.

  22. Today the BBC had the following headline on its news site:
    Is Malmo the ‘rape capital’ of Europe?
    Well, I’ll be fucking buggered….

  23. Macca has finally said that it was John Lennon who broke up The Beatles… Which he did, by bringing in Allen Klein and the horrendous Yoko… McCartney stopped short though of also blaming Yoko Fucking Ono…. Wonder if he’ll raise a glass when the old witch finally pops off?…

  24. Since my mate returned from West Africa, he can’t stop buying raffle tickets.
    After extensive tests, doctors believe he has contracted the Tombola virus….

Comments are closed.