Congratulations to Proper Cunt who correctly predicted that Stephen ‘Davros’ Hawking was the next celeb to kick the bucket (not literally obviously)!
Seems that the author of the world’s most boring book will write no more, so it’s not all bad news. Dioclese nominated him for years before changing horses. No staying power that bloke!
So we move on to Dead Pool 87.
Here are the rules (pay special attention to the first one)
1. Nominate who you think is the next cunt on the way out. You can have up to five choices. List your nominations in the comments of this post. It’s the current Dead Pool. Comments not in this post (e.g. in the previous one or other posts) will be ignored!
2. You win if your Cunt dies first.
Then the slate is wiped clean and we start again. Of course, you can always be a really annoying cunt and steal someone else’s dead cunt candidate from the previous pool (like Black and White Cunt frequently does).
Any cunt who tries to cheat by nominating the World’s Oldest Man or Woman is a cunt and will be ignored. Any anonymous cunt who can’t be bothered to make up a name for themselves will also be ignored. Oh, and the usual “Our Blog Our Rules” thing applies.
Nominations are now open on this post only. AND BEFORE YOU NOMINATE, FUCKING READ THE EXISTING NOMS TO CHECK THAT NONE OF YOUR PICKS HAVE BEEN TAKEN ALREADY! Good luck
Stan Lee
Olivia de Havilland
Peter, Lord Carrington
Pierre Cardin
Bill Turnbull
Yeah, I did have him for yonks! C’est La vie…
0
Tessa Jowell
Cloris Leachman
Betty White
Bill Clinton
Bridget Bardot
0
Sergei Skripal
Yulia Skripal
Nick Bailey
Vera Lynn
Herman Wouk
0
Doris Day
Vera Lynn
Kirk Douglas
Jimmy Carter
Jimmy Greaves
Storm in Treeza! I wanna fight!
(Sorry Freddie – pipped at the post with Vera. Admin)
0
Strange. Must be one of those black holes the spaz was always on about.
Franco Zeferreli
1
Think we must have hit the button at the same time judging by the time stamps on the comments?
0
Sepp Blatter
Michel Platini
Jack Warner
Jerome Valcke
Geoff Hurst
0
Stirling Moss
Michael Douglas
Betty White
Linda Nolan
George Bush snr
0
White taken.
Substitute Javier Perez de Cuelar
0
Sidney Poitier
Kenny Lynch
Iris Apfel
Norman Tebbit
Pam “fucking” Ayres
——
True what they say, always come in 3’s (Dodd, Givency, Hawking).
0
Billy Connelly
Jerry Lee Lewis
Mickey Gilley
Willie Nelson
Prince Phillip The Duke of Edinburgh
0
Larry David
Angela Lansbury
Leah Bracknell
John McCririck
Sir Menzies Campbell
0
Hardy Kruger
Terry Jones
Jerry Maren
Jill Gascoigne
Richard O’Sullivan.
Farewell Stephen Hawking. Anyone who thought Corbyn was a cunt couldn’t be all bad.
7
Doesn’t take the world’s smartest man to figure that out.
3
‘Appen your right Shaun.
1
When asked where one could find the biggest black hole Professor Hawking replied “Diane Abbot”
2
Gerald Harper
Bill Maynard
Katie Boyle
Millicent Martin
Desmond Morris
0
Olivia Newton John
David Soul
Jan Michel Vincent
Val Kilmer
Bernard Hepton
0
I would offer farewells to Hawking but the 24 hour obituary on the ABBC is doing it all, between Paralympics GB.
Barbara Bush
Donald Sutherland
Bob Hawke
Charles Aznavour
Aretha Franklin
0
John Venables [the murdering perv]
Lilly Allen
Sean Connery
Donald trump
Shirly Bassy
0
Ozzy Osborne
Dennis skinner
Bill Cosby
Madeleine albright
George Takei (sulu)
0
June Whitfield
Ray Reardon
William Shatner
Nicholas Parsons
Windsor Davies
0
Congrats Dio…
John Carpenter
Hal Holbrook
Al Leong
Dennis Waterman
Derren Nesbit
0
Bugger, I mean congrats Proper Cunt. Must pay attention…
1
Ginger Baker
Pope Francis
Sheldon Adelson
Rick Wakeman
George Soros
Cuntgrats dio
God will not be mocked! stephen hawking had it coming the cheeky know it all cunt haha lol “I know all the secrets of the universe but its a ancient chinese secret”
1
Stefan Karl Steffanson
Colin Butts
Marieke Vervoot
Nobby Stiles
Leslie Phillips
0
My old uni quiz team was called Stephen Hawkings running machine.
3
I had him up for a CTRL, Alt and deleting so along with Mark E. Smith, I’m already two up this year on my list.
For ISAC, I’ll throw in one of my 2018 wildcards – Jan Michael Vincent (Airwolf pilot. Looked like he was circling the drain in some recent pictures I saw of him)
Slightly low hanging fruit but there were some pictures of Burt Reynolds in the paper today and that cunt doesn’t look like he should be putting any double albums on.
4
Buzz Aldrin
Chuck Yeager
Virginia McKenna
Michael Collins (astronaut)
Robert Mugabe
0
My usual picks please,
Dick Van Dyke
James Earl Jones
Gary Glitter
Freddy Foreman
Angela Lansbury
0
Change Lansbury for Robert Duvall.
0
Bob Dole
Warren Buffett
Engelbert Humperdinck
Henry Kissinger
Honor Blackman
0
Anna Soubry (Conservative traitor)
John Bercow (Bollocks to Brexit, indeed)
Nicola Sturgeon (Too many reasons to list)
Justin Trudeau (Canadian twat)
Leo Eric Varadkar (Irish poof)
Another wishful thinking list. Cunts.
1
In 1. Its Jim Bowen.
In 2. Nazanin Zaghari-Ratcliffe, Britain’s favourite Journo, sorry I meant celebrity inmate. Still waiting at the luxury villa for Boris & the briefcase, currently dealing with another spy issue.
In 3. Its another Stay Away Mum on holiday, its Kate McCann. “Oops, I forgot to say, I’ve doped them up already”.
In 4. Keeping the gender fluids happy with a Stay Away Dad, its Gerry McCann. “Oh, I gave them a few spoonfuls too. Should be okay. Let’s go for dinner, I’m starving”
They should have both stayed away…for life, behind bars in Portugal and someone could have made them disappear at night.
5. Shona “the fairground prize gonk” Robison. (Scotland’s equivalent to Jeremy Hunt).
She’s planning to reinvent NHS Scotland with the money raised from fixed price alcohol?
No more, Nicola’s using it for free abortions to loose legged Oirish birds. Sad that “the slappers actually paid” £650+ at NHS England Hospitals? That’s Krankie EconoNic’s for you.
1
Jim Bowen has just died!!!
0
Has Jim just popped his clogs?
0
Bowen’s a goner! Top darts, lad!
0
Fucking hell Basement
Judging by the times of the various media reports of Jim Bowen’s death, he was dead within about an hour of you nominating him.
Unfortunately you win nothing but your BFH… Bus Fare Home
1
The Dalai Lama
Rupert Murdoch
Alex Ferguson
Neil Simon
Nile Rodgers
He had an amazon mind and an incredible sense of humour. You’ve got to admire his energy for going on such a long….
Oh wait, that’s my Ken Dodd eulogy!
It’s comforting to know that even the greatest mind of a generation can be stroked by the dirty hand of lucre. That Specsavers ad must’ve kept him in porn mags for years. Now he’s carked it. How the fuck did he last so long. I would’ve thought his girlfriend/nanny/partner would’ve beaten him to death years ago solely for his silly political opinions.
1
Mikey hesletine . Queen Liz. Gary player. Dick van dyke. Harry styles.
0
Lilly Allen
Lilley Allen
Lilley Allen
0
Pat Robertson
James Caan
Amitabh Bachchan
Quincy Jones
Mary cunting Berry
0