Food packaging labels

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Bullshit on food packaging to trick the dumb into thinking it’s healthy…… Why the fuck when I buy a 330ml can of fizzy sugar does it give me the nutrition values ‘per 165ml serving’…. What kind of cunt would drink half a can of fizz and save the other half for the next day?

Or when some gm processed to fuck mechanically recovered meat based turd in a pack has ‘no artificial flavourings’ on the front of its packaging…. No shit sherlock but it does have 13 e numbers, artificial preservatives, artificial colouring, emulsifiers, binding agents and who knows what the fuck else in it…. Stop being cunts and trying to mislead dumb cunts…… Most of us know it’s dodgy shit but it tastes good…… Just man up and tell it like it is. If people like shit they will buy shit don’t need the bullshit…..

We all know cigs are bad and now there are pictures of some poor fuck coughing up a lung on every side of the pack but smokers still smoke. If I fancy eating or drinking some shit in a tray or piss in a can I will but don’t need some fucker pissing down my back but telling me it’s raining…… Cunts

Nominated by Cunt dracula.

49 thoughts on “Food packaging labels”

  1. It’s all a barrel of Cunt!!
    They need to simplify the labels..
    This will make you a fat Cunt!!
    This will not make you a fat Cunt!
    How many people know the optimum daily fat intake for a man / woman?
    Also how many people know the difference between fat/ saturated fat figures ?
    Good fats/ bad fats etc…….
    also …. who gives a fuck!! 😂😂
    Here’s a revolutionary idea,
    Putting on weight? Eat less, drink less booze and exercise a little more…..
    weight stable? Carry on…
    losing weight? ( without a change in eating/ drinking habits ) Eat more, exercise less or go to your doctor!!
    Someone needs to explain this to the younger generation!!
    My wife’s 45 and has a better figure than many 18 yo girls!!
    Her secret??
    Less Mac Donald’s, chocolate and booze…….. and some physical exercise ………

    • On a packet of peanuts…

      “May contain peanuts. Not suitable for peanut allergy sufferers.”

      JC, I would never have sussed that one out – so glad they told me !

      What they don’t tell you about peanuts, though, is the ATROCIOUS farting, not to mention the fact than on opening the packet, it smells like a fart.
      Being a pre-op elephant, I know this.

    • Lucky cunt. I haven’t got a bird right now, but I’m on the lookout. God, so many fat munters. Nutcases too… Oh wtf. I give up…

      • I’m a nutcase magnet. Before I fully embraced the more reliable joys of onanism, I could pull nothing else. Alternatively, that may mean that they’re all fucking mad. Apologies to any here, but I post with deep feeling.

  2. Or labels like…

    “It’s healthy! But it tastes like shit!”

    Or

    “Farmer Giles’ Hardening of the Arteries Scratchings.”

    That’s only the labels I need.

  4. What a lot of young people seem to have food allergies these days…wheat,dairy,nuts etc. I don’t know anyone of my generation who has a food allergy,but a lot of them claim that their kids do. I reckon that it’s just pandering to the spoiled sods.

    • Lettuce, kiwi, raw potatoes, milk, water melon, and (Nicola) Sturgeon.
      I’m allergic to the lot.

      And that’s just touching them with skin.

      • That’s because you’re a veggie pushbiker. You’re bound to have “issues”. Have you got over your ‘flu? That was probably due to your dissolute lifestyle too.

      • Welcome back ya squab massacring cunt.

        Hope yer well Dick Fiddler.

        Still getting over this flu….
        Bad shite man. Really bad shite.

        I’m trying to get back on track but my heads fucked. Over a week in isolation has given my thoughts an even darker edge to what they were before. So I might come across a wee bit barmier than usual.😂

      • A recent statement from Forbes said that vegetarians are more likely to suffer from depression.

        As a vegetarian for many years think perhaps that they may be right.

        Or is it more likely to be down to the shitty diet of Remainers Brexit propaganda and lies that I am force fed every fucking day?

      • Ah, just imagine her standing there with her eight strap suspender belt, tan fully fashioned nylons and stiletto’s beckoning you over with the finger?

        If Carlsberg made horror movies?

    • It’s because of the modern parenting fuckers. I mean the piss take of these modern parent cunts was even in Viz over 30yrs ago.

      They’re of the: “We’ve read that you shouldn’t give children X, Y, Z, etc.”

      They fill their houses with dust filters. Their kids “only ever had breast milk until they were 7 – he loves his ‘bitty’!” and fed them hermetically sealed, organic, overpriced shit.

      They’re not allowed to play out in the cold or rain or get covered in clarts.

      And then when the cunt finally fuck’s off to nursery school it’s all of a sudden allergic to everything, lactose intolerant, covered in eczema and breathing like peedough (see what I did there) at a kids beauty pageant with asthma!

      And the modern parents are stood there, hands on hips, scratching their heads as to why!?!

      I was a little kid in the 70’s and I used to be in and out of coal shed, jumping doffers over a rancid brook. Only had formula cos I wouldn’t suck the tit (not an issue these days mind), was given whatever my folks were having food wise from beef, pork, fish, nuts, the lot and was in an environment of smoke as both my folks smoked.

      I never ailed a thing through school/college/poly and am not on one tablet as I hurtle to the big 50.

      Apparently I live a bad lifestyle according to my younger, fitter, statin and painkiller riddled peers. Hmmm… yep, I do, but I don’t rattle as I walk about either!

      I drink like a fish and eat shit that (to quote First Blood) would make a billy-goat puke!

      My kids have been allowed to do the same as me. The have the usual shit in the house like PCs, PS4s, iPads but if it’s sunny outside they’re out and about kicking a ball, hitting a ball or doing doffers.

      They have always eaten the same as me and Mrs Cunt and now when we go away get fist deep in shit like cuttlefish and octopus cataplana, squid, all shellfish, anything they’ve not had they’ll try – just like I would do.

      Compare this to some of their peers (whose parents are 10yrs younger than me and Mrs cunt) who will “…only eat beans on toast…” or cheese and onion crisps or chocolate, etc., and a lot of them are the most sickly cunts you’ll see.

      That’s not the kid’s fault, it’s all down to the well-meaning but completely misguided modern parent mantra of bollocks!

      They think they’re doing right by their kids but alas they’re setting them up for a huge fall in the immunity and food tolerance stakes.

      Alas generation snowflake’s kids will be even more fucked because they don’t even know what sex they’re supposed to be!

      What a bunch of cunt!

      • To right m8 growiing up as a kid in the early 70s and from a family of nine you got what you were given and never say to mother at dinner table “hes got more than me” because she,d pick plate up and pour it over your head but i still love rhubarb crumble and birds custard and have appreciated food as it is
        I love drinking milk and once mistakinley bought a lactose free half litre of putrid piss vile
        And i took my mrs to Berlin and we went for a ruby murry in a resteraunt and on the next table was a bunch of yanks who had ordered the full monty and when the their grub finaly came one of the shits piped up “has this got nuts in it ” !
        The poor waiter had to take the lot back and everybody knows it has nuts and the restaraunt ditched it and cooked it without nuts WHAT A CUNT
        NEEDS TO BE SPOONFED SUN BAKED CRUMBLY WHITE DOG SHIT

      • Dogs are no longer permitted bones, that’s where. They have quail ‘n’ spinach doggyfeast from an individual no-mess pouch at £££ a throw. Same infantile shit as all the above.

        Add to the reminiscences – I remember my mother boiling lights and lamb breast (which was v.cheap then) for our mutts, which didn’t seem to object to the diet. Stunk the house out…

      • Back in the ’60s my dad fed our dogs raw melts, which is a form of cow’s offal, I believe…the dogs went nuts, took them less than 3 seconds to wolf the entire lot down.

  5. Myanmar, where a lot of people may not read or write has a simple solution on food packaging. Little caricatures of a skinny kid, a plump kid or a fat porky cunt.

    • That would be sizeist mate.

      I am the size of a minor planet and consider myself to be a fat cunt.

      However a lot of folk like me are just “big boned” or have a medical condition which makes them fat. The medical condition being a working mouth and gut!

      • Never saw a fat boy come out of Belsen or Time Team boffins squealing about the ” the large bones” on this skeleton. Its simple to much in not enough out.

  6. All they have to do is print what is in it and let us decide what we want to eat and in how much quantity.

    Forcing manufacturing to put less sugar in things to “comply” and destroying the taste doesn’t help those who have some self control.

    Halving the amount of sugar in a can of fizzy drink will just have the kid drink two cans or have an extra bar of chocolate instead.

    I would lock up parents of fat kids for child abuse, often a product mirrored by their own lifestyles.

    The amount of times I have seen kids no more than eight years old in fast food places being presented large adult meals and deserts by the parents is ridiculous. Oh I suppose its just because they’re a growing boy / girl.

    • The “serving suggestions” on the packaging make me laugh. For instance if the subject is a pie, it is usually pictured on a plate with either a tomato or some leaves next to it. It just goes to show how many thick cunts there must be around now. Without these helpful instructions.the cunts would probably be eating the pie off the floor.

      • On the subject of overweight children, saw two boys on Argos this morning, almost certainly brothers and aged about 13 to 15.

        Both severely overweight and each with tits bigger than Mrs Stroker’s.

  7. Everything I have heard about what is good or bad to eat changes every year.

    It keeps people in jobs, spouting this shite.
    My pet hate is actimel addicts. My daughter has them everyday under maters orders yet as far as I’m aware, they are placebos.

    But then, that report that said actimel is pointless could very well change next year, so, fuck knows.

    I believe very little of what I am told anyway, coz I’m a smart cunt that makes up his own mind with no scientific analysis getting in the way of my thoughts. 😁

    • Basically, life is bad for us…but THEY haven’t let on yet.
      Possibly because we all know already.

      • Trust yourself. And your instincts – they didn’t take millions of years to develop for nowt.

      • They are making it bad for us though in purpose, they want us all fucked.

        You notice the people who live into their hundreds live their life as simple as they did in their childhood and don’t buy into the “processed lifestyle” created by cunts and technology.

        Their houses still look as they did back in the day too, no layers of fresh chemicals on the wall each year and fabrics treated with nice chemicals to make them fire retardant and insect proof.

        Your also lucky if you see a television either.

    • Are they not just thinned down yoghurt drinks anyway?

      Full of good bacteria allegedly which is what yoghurt is?

      Marketing bullshit they feed us, be better if they could make us one of them juice / shake type things out of a big sirloin steak, fried onions & mushrooms, thick cut homemade chips and a pint of Stella.

      You could save a load of time by drinking it on the way home from work so that your fed when you arrive home.

      Imagine being half way down your bottle of Châteauneuf-du-Pape before Bradley Walsh asks you to come and have a go if you think your smart enough.

    • The fact that anyone could believe a 100ml dose of curdled milk costing 50p or more, if bought as a single, will improve your health, marks them out as absolute suckers that the marketeers depend on to make the huge profits these products return.

      I can’t help but think YouTube must be the gift that keeps on giving for the marketing teams at Danone (IMO) or Wiseman et al as they look to target their latest overpriced miniature bottle of gloop.

      Any sucker that ‘detoxes’ is a primary target. Don’t these fuckwits understand that it’s the Liver and Kidneys that have been performing that function perfectly well since time began.

      There’s a type of coffee called Kopi Luwak, it’s the most expensive coffee in the world at around £60 a cup. The beans are extracted from the shite produced by Luwaks, which are cat like creatures from South Asia.

      it’s billed as the most luxurious coffee in the world and is supposed to have many totally unproven health benefits.

      If only I’d thought of that, damn.

  8. By the way, Andrew Turnbull is a cunt. Ex head of the civil service during Bliar’s tenure is quoted as saying ‘Brexit attacks on civil service ‘are worthy of 1930s Germany’. The fucking gloves are well and truly off now shit kicker. Anarchy awaits.

  9. The fact is they want us to be scared all the time.
    Scared of the Soviets, then scared of the IRA, now scared of the Muzzies and the Ruskies again.
    Scared of what we eat and drink…it will kill us just as sure as the terrorists will.
    Scared of the air we breathe for fucks sake !
    Scared of poverty……the fucking EU will save us don’t worry.
    Scared of upsetting people with what we think and say. Thick cunts may not like us….really scary.
    Scared people are easy to control.

    • That explains why Catweazle took cover under the Flabbot, he was scared of some cunt.

      Would take some rounds to get through her kevlar enforced blubber.

  10. Fucking great cunting, I agree wholeheartedly .

    How the fuck am I supposed to know (or care) what 3.5g means?

    It’s good or bad .. pretty obvious really.

    Thank fuck for my phones autospell. … fuckin genius!

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