I’ll tell you who are cunts: those poncey fuckers who spend all day in coffee shops with their laptops out, posing as writers or digital entrepreneurs.
Hogging all the tables, acting as though the coffee shop in question is their personal office and looking down their noses at customers with less interesting jobs than themselves, when everyone knows that REAL writers or digital entrepreneurs put in a hell of a lot of hard graft and don’t have hours to waste drinking overpriced coffee.
One day very soon I’m going to smack one of these cunts in the face with their cunting MacBook Pro.
Nominated by: Fred West
I second that. Any person that spends their handouts on a top end mac pro to then have to use it in a cafe cause they cant afford an internet connection is a right twat.
Its not like the cunts are that busy they need to be working during a coffee break – its more they have no option than to do it there and upload their selfies. Fucking cunts.
Speaking of, after trying to make some sense between men kissing and american overload, are the BAFTAs right for a cunting?
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The BAFTAs is indeed a cuntfest…. Beckham at the BAFTAS?!
He has a lot to do with film, television and theatre, doesn’t he?…
Beckham apart (and rather him than his revolting wife!), the BAFTAs
is much like the overrated and overhyped Academy Awards: a luvvie infested cunt gathering…. With mucho arselicking and expensive freebies being given out to already rich cunts…
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I encountered one of these knobchops shortly in a café in Manchester city centre shortly before Christmas. Dumb shit even managed to cunt himself. Not content with having his laptop on the table, along with several other peripheral piles of shit, this suited and booted chump was talking loudly on his mobile about the multi million pound deal he was working on. Nobody was impressed, but he provided much hilarity when, mid brag, his fucking phone started ringing. The look on the dickweed’s face while everyone was laughing at him was priceless.
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I might have seen this same tosspot myself, QDM… I work near Deansgate and there’s a yuppy twat who frequents the coffee shps and bars around there… He is always speaking out loud and waving his latest Iphone around… Town is full of cunts like him these days…
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A thoroughly deserved cunting indeed. The only reason these psuedo wannabe writers infest the coffee shops is so they can milk the free wi-fi.
Buy yourself a frappamochaespressochnio or whatever for £4 and get free wi-fi all day, shower of fucking shite the lot of them.
I once saw a guy outside a Starbucks (as I walked past) spill a coffee on his Macbook Pro, I laughed so hard he noticed and gave me a dirty look, to which I replied “Hope there was no sugar in that coffee” LMAO (anyone in IT knows if you spill ANY sugary drink on a laptop it is fucked no matter how quickly you mop it up and dry it off 😀
A good nomination Fred, kudos my serial killer friend!
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Any twat that keeps 24/7 on their person IT hardware paraphernalia in order to find free WiFi connected Internet for the price of a train fare or a cup of posh coffee, and likes to show off about it in public places is a total socially engineered zombie drone cunt.
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I bet Flaxen Saxon could find a method of dealing with them.
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Agreed, those fucking Sheep who queue up for like 3 days just to get the iPhone 7386 (or whatever the latest model is) deserve a damn good cunting too!
And the people who ‘customise’ their iPhones with a case like they are individuals is possibly the best example of an oxymoron you will ever find!
Oh look at me with my pink Iphone cover, I’m so unique and individual – corporate Sheep sucking at the teat of enslavement – cretins!
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Those fuckers are even worse than the coffee shop surfers. What sort of dweeb sits outside a shop for a week or more, just to buy a fucking phone? I mean, IT’S A FUCKING PHONE! And one made by a company that was formerly owned by a complete and utter cunt.
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The wankers who parade their portable I.T. wealth like a digital penis extension deserve to be mugged, buggered and beaten up, which in certain cities in the UK, they would like a shot. Aside from those thieving scouse bastards, there are plenty of scallies in Sunderland who would cheerfully oblige.
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Sam Allardyce is a cunt… Now I am more than a little frustrated at how Man United are playing right now (mostly shite!), but I have seen far worse (Dave Sexton and 86-89 Fergie, for a start!)… But for Fat Sam to moan about United using long ball tactics?! When it comes to exciting and attacking football, Allardyce is hardly Cesar Luis Menotti, Rinus Michels or Tommy Docherty himself… Fat Sam has always had the delusion that he is a ‘Big Name Manager’…. Except he has won fuck all, whereas Van Gaal has won the lot in his time… He has inherited a sack of shit at Old Trafford though… Only those two porn barons (Gold and Sullivan) at ‘West Aiiiiim’ would see Allardyce as a managerial catch…. Dodgy customers attract other dodgy customers (I remember Panorama)… So fuck off, Sam!
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Allardyce complained that United kept playing the long ball. Then Van Gaal, using match statistics and facts, proved that Allardyce’s mob actually used the long ball almost twice as much as United. Stitch that Sam, you fat cunt. I used to like Sam, but he’s become a real moaning cunt over the past few years.
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LVG’s press conference today was priceless… He’s up against it at the moment, but he knows more about football than Fat Sam ever will…
I am waiting for when Louis loses it with the press, because he will… Ask any Dutch journo who has got on the wrong side of him….
Right Side
Left Side
Stretford End
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I couldn’t help noticing that 100,000 peaceful muslims spent the weekend protesting against Charlie Hebdo printing an image of their peado prophet. For some reason, this involved them showing their contempt for freedom by jumping on a statue of Field Marshall Montgomery. Among the many banners and placards denouncing free speech and supporting terrorists, were a number that bore the message, “Learn Some Manners”. Really, you intolerant, racist, over reactive, anti semitic, dark age, intolerant scum?
You come to my country, cause nothing but trouble, demand special treatment for your “culture” and expect us to kow tow to your shitty beliefs, and you think WE lack manners. Fucking hypocrites. A couple of days ago, there was a story in the papers about two 16 year old female army cadets being threatened with beheading by two adherents of the religion of peace. Why weren’t those 100,000 muslims protesting against that?
In other news, Wiltshire police have had to apologise after it was revealed that some officers had gone to a number of news agents and asked for the names of addresses of all the people who had bought a copy of Charlie Hebdo. Had I been one of those news agents, the answer would have been “FUCK OFF”! Plod tried to excuse this prodnosery by claiming it was part of an “assessment of community tensions”. Bollocks.
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It was a few months ago in Manchester that an Army Cadet……… ya know – a child, was selling poppies and some cunt for some unknown reason which nobody at the time speculated about decided to give the young lad the old lighter and aerosol treatment in the face and walk away unremonstrated and unarrested…………. I’m sure it was completely unrelated to the religion of peace of course.
Every time some terrorist cunt enacts some medieval brutality and states it is in the name of Islam the instant response from politicians and “moderate” muslims is to go all “no true Scotsman” and state the opposite.
I’m sorry muslim moderates but if you are such good people and are so offended by being associated with these butchering cunts who read the same damn book as you then maybe you should drop the label muslim altogether or become secular atheists like myself – you don’t even need a tribal religious identity to be good people, you can do that all by yourselves. If you don’t want to follow and adhere to every diktat in the book of Islam then stop calling yourselve’s adherents of the Islamic religion you cherry-picking hypocrite cunts! (that goes for people of all religions by the way).
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These cunts actually manage to cunt themselves. There’s one on trial right now, charged with planning to murder a British soldier. Apparently, he idolised the two cock jockeys who murdered Lee Rigby. On reading the story, it seems he researched the locations of a number of British Army establishments, and Army cadet units. To me, that means the cowardly little shite was planning to murder a child if he couldn’t find a soldier.
Then there’s the story in the Daily Express of the Muslim family who’ve taken exception to a Gypsy (even the dead don’t won’t Gypo’s anywhere near them) being buried in the plot next to their snuffed relative. Apparently, it’s a multi faith graveyard in Leicester, but the muzzies thought the section they buried their stiff in was for muzzies only. They’re not happy, and say their dead relative wouldn’t have wanted to be buried next to a non believer.
I have a simple solution to that. Dig the fucking muslim up and bury the twat in whichever muzzie shithole he came from. Problem solved. Apparently, those plots cost £2,500. That’s a lot of sheets just to bury someone in a box. A commenter in the DE reckons the graveyard used to be a pig farm. I fucking hope so. The irony of muslims being buried there is just too poetic.
In all honesty though, I think it’s time to admit that the multicultural society that treacherous shite Blair forced on us, has failed. Moreover, it’s time we kicked all muslims off our green and pleasant land. They’ve have 60 years or so to integrate, and they’ve failed. Not only that, but every attempt to get them to integrate, has resulted in them spitting in our faces. They’ve proved they don’t belong here, it’s time for them to fuck off.
And while I’m thinking about it, Romanians need to fuck off too. They’re just thieving fuckers.
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I think you mean Romany Gypsies mate, not Romananians – different thing altogether.
Not all Romananians are thieving Gypos and not all thieving Gypos are Romanians………… but all Gypos are thieving cunts – fact.
Thieving isn’t just for the caravan-dwelling, inbred shitbirds of Irish descent, it’s also a favourite Romany pastime.
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Fact of the matter is, the UK is full up. China has space aplenty and I’m sure they could find a few thousand acres to resettle them there. While we are at it, why not deport the entire city of Liverpool. doubt the Chinese would notice, at least until they’d stolen all the sand from the Gobi desert.
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I wonder what Lee Rigby’s family would think of their ‘protest?’
Speaking of Monty, does anyone think that he or Churchill would have put up with these cunts dictating what is and isn’t done here in Britain? Of course they wouldn’t… But we get a shithouse like Cameron… And if it isn’t him it’ll be that prick, Milliband…
The 51st State of the USA? More like the new caliphate…
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Churchill’s thoughts on muslims are well documented.
He fucking despised them.
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With good reason too.
Say what you will about Churchill. He was a bigoted, intolerant and arrogant old sot but one with some deep foresight into the ways of the world and were he alive today, I’ll warrant he would not allow this pandering to minority demands.
The trouble with our politicians is that they not only feed the hand that bites them but they ignore the fact it has bitten them.
Far easier for plod to investigate those with right wing views than to actually arrest Islamic troublemakers, because there is nobody now who will fight the corner of the majority.
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Churchill was at least a better choice than the other cunt with funny tash and stiff arm. Hitler wasn’t it? Or was it Angela Merkel. I get confused…
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He thought De Gaulle was a cunt too. That’s the same De Gaulle who banned the original Charlie Hebdo for making out he was a cunt. Then by banning them and preaching freedom of the press, we went on and proved it!
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