George Clarke

This smug mackem cunt has been winding my clock for years but he’s just burst the fucking spring with his latest cunty uttering?

Long and the short of it – his 15 year old son racked up a £4,500 mobile ‘phone bill. George “massively blames” himself but then goes on to say that he’s moving all personal and business mobiles away from the provider (Vodafone) because they should have done something about it.

I’m certainly no defender of Vodafone (having once threatened to sue them for damages if they didn’t stop sending me marketing texts after I’d moved to another network) but just how the fuck is this situation their fault?

Apparently his son’s monthly spend is usually “less than 2%” of this latest figure. How in the Blazing Arse of Hades do you even get a £90 ‘phone bill?! A 30 quid “Big Value Bundle” on Voda gives 20GB of data, three THOUSAND minutes of talk time (over an hour and a half a day!) and unlimited texts. You’d barely have the ‘phone out of your wanking spanners with that amount of free usage.

Give the little cunt a PAYG SIM, a good clip round the ear and then both you and he TAKE SOME FUCKING RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR ACTIONS and stop trying to blame others for your blatant ineptitude.


Nominated by Thirkleby Spunktrumpet

45 thoughts on “George Clarke

  1. Having read this and Kids at the Doctors it is time that millenials got another cunting.

    I’d do it myself but I don’t think I would ever stop typing – Londistan being plagued by these self absorbed utter cunts.

  2. The man’s a top-class wanker. I quite enjoy watching these home restoration shows that him and Kevin McCloud do…Grand Design,The Restoration Man, etc. What really fucked me off was when Clarke told a pair of The Gays to reign their ideas in,or they’d go bust….What a Cunt !,Thats why I watch these shows,to see some smug,eco-warrior types go bust building a glorified rabbit hutch. There’s no fear of McCloud telling them to calm down,It’s spend,spend,spend with him,until they’ve gone virtually bust,and he can walk around their pride and joy sneering at the bourgeoisie decoration and unfinished exterior.

    Clarke should buck his ideas up and stop trying to give sensible and sound advice to whichever idiots are getting ripped off by their builder and architect. That’s why I watch,to see their dreams crumble in a flurry of foreclosures and unfinished monuments to bad taste.

    Fuck them.

  3. Like the small spaces on his show but he’s a big grinning flappy handed cunt.
    That cunt mate of his with the trilby looks like a libtard hippy cunt too.

  4. Off topic
    SNP UTTER CUNT MPs ( not the Wee daddy ones in Edinburgh) Just fucked off oot the House of Commons
    I am embarrassed
    Our country is fucked
    Even worse than I thought

    • I wouldn’t worry about them. They’re too fucking stupid to realise how stupid they are, the infantile, rusk-munching cunts.

  5. This cunt must live by me, saw him wondering around with what must be his son. He looks like an Americunt… Massive head and smile. He needs a kick in the bollocks. As for the phone bill I dunno how you’d run up a bill like that but to blame the provider demonstrates his cunt credentials.

  6. Top notch cunting Spunktrumpet!

    10 years ago my brother-in-law ran up a Vodafone bill of over £40,000.!!! Fuck knows how… but being a higher functioning autistic probably had something to do with it. Long story short – house down the shitter, divorce followed swiftly thereafter.

    Should Vodafone have accepted some responsibility, or stepped in earlier? I have no idea. Never owned a mobile myself.

    However, I strongly go along with the general thrust of this cunting: individual responsibility. Clarke is a cunt of the first order.

    Brother-in-law now back living with mummy where he belongs.

    Btw, reassuring to see the Establishment buying off Bernard Jenkins with a knighthood.

    • 40k? By god and sunny jesus that is some bill. Must have been visiting porn streaming sites in a foreign country. Tsk tsk.

      • If only it had been streaming porn!

        No, this was a basic Vodafone mobile… the autistic (undiagnosed but obvious) cunt was out of control, phoning everyone and his dog – premium scams, sex lines, ‘friends’ abroad, etc. This was 10 years ago remember. Hopefully things are different nowadays…

    • How strange, judging by the comments I get, I had convinced myself that I was the only person in the world that didn’t possess a mobile phone.Are you some sort of social leper?👍

      • I am indeed Fillipo – and a proud upstanding recluse to boot!

        And ISAC is the only ‘social media’ site I have any personal experience of.

        • #me too👍 Facefuck occasionally to sort streaming problems out but that’s it.

      • I have a mobile but it hardly gets used aside from posting on ISAC. Between June and December last year I used £10 worth of credit. That’s only £10 more than a you spend on your non existent mobile.

    • Reckon I must have remembered the figure from your earlier nomination Ruff Tuff

  7. I only ever do PAYG for this exact kind of reason. So much more convenient than being locked into a contract.

    • I got my first mobile with a 12 month contract in 1995 when my wife, at the time, was pregnant and I was ‘temping’ so she didn’t know where I was from day to day so she couldn’t let me know she was ready to sprog (this came in useful later in our marriage). The bloody thing cost me over £30 a month before calls. I can’t remember the cost of the calls but I remember that I didn’t dare use it as I couldn’t fucking afford it! PAYG since then, rarely spent over £10 in a year and now, with a smartphone, only ever spend a fiver a month on data which I almost hardly use as well.

  8. Cannot bear to watch this annoying smiling twat nor listen to what he has to say.

    Preferred Grand Designs but even that is now usually only about smug cunts who like to show off and have millions to spend on their ridiculously opulent tastes.

    £4.5 k on a mobile phone bill? That’s nothing compared to one I have heard of recently of approximately £40k!!!!!!

    George is in my opinion partially right in that the major mobile phone providers should be made to legally take more responsibility and not be allowed for individuals to rack up such massive bills over a long time span as there may well be specific reasons the providers are unaware of.

    • Re £40k ref – you probably clocked the brief reply I left when Spunktrumpet’s nom was first submitted… around 3 weeks ago?

  9. I wasn’t on this particular job but a company I freelance for occasionally, worked on his show.
    The lads said once the filming had finished, all the incessant smiling, looking a bit airy fairy and using the word “space” every two minutes soon stopped.
    Apparently he was dead normal, a good laugh and a funny cunt, was first to the bar, bought nearly all the drinks through the evening, and pretty much a top bloke.
    Make of that what you will….

    • More than happy to give him the benefit of the doubt, especially on news from a fellow cunter from those who have worked with him. You naturally assume that he is being himself on the show and a head up his own arse sort.

      Still find him an annoying cunt to watch on though and won’t be tuning in anytime soon.

    • He’s always seemed ok to me, like Kevin on GD, healthily sceptic about over-budget spends…

      My piss boils when I hear “We managed to ‘borrow’ 150 grand from our friends/family”…

      And a few weeks ago, some IoW build went over budget by half a million or something obscene. I was waiting for the builders to use the client as foundations for their next project but, as they always seem to do, the greedy cunt with no “Stop” button on his spend function managed to pay everyone off.

  10. I’m fucking embarrassed to be from the same generation as these fuckwitted, brainless imbeciles. Spoilt, overly sensitive and clueless are a few words that come to mind. Not much hope for the future.

  11. I put this kind of stupidity into the same class as MacIntyre who spends £15,000 on a watch. Fifteen fucking thousand fucking quid for a fucking watch. Anyone who pays that sort of money for a watch – and £120,000 for a fucking car – wants his fucking bumps read.

    Two talentless fuckers with more money than sense !!!

    There. I feel better now…

    • Good for you Dio, the most I’ve ever spent on a car is £7k, over 3 years old, and £150 on a watch.

      • Just to add that, since I’m unemployed, time has no meaning for me and, since I can’t afford the petrol/road tax/insurance, the car is fucking useless.

    • I have often wondered if a £15k watch tells a different kind of time from a £10 casio.

  12. Sounds like there’s plenty of, ahem, open space between his son’s ears, the stupid cunt.

  13. Top nomination there TS. Like you, I’ve had problems with Vodaphone. When I switched from them to O2, Vodaphone continued to send me bills for £0.00. It took TWELVE phone calls and almost as many letters before they finally got the message that I was no longer a customer.

    As for Clarke, he is definitely a massive cunt. What were Vodaphone supposed to do? Block the phone? They didn’t make his progeny use his phone so much. They had no control over it. It’s just as well that Clarke blames himself, because as the boy’s father, it’s HIS job to ensure that his son uses his phone sensibly. being the father of four daughters, I know how difficult it can be to do that, but it isn’t impossible.

    • Many years ago, with a previous wife, my (then) 11 year-old son told me he wanted a phone. I told him to go and fucking buy one then. End of ‘I want’ story.

  14. Modern advances in capacitor technology should allow the use of the phone’s battery to deliver a rectum releasing level of electric shock therapy. Directly to the side of the head.
    It could be set up to look like a phone call from one of your contacts, and rigged as a result if preset parent conditions, for example during mealtimes.
    Simple, but effective solution. Everyone’s a winner.

  15. So, after today’s PMQ’s, I find myself having to make a mass nomination. And that nomination is for the entire SNP. Having had their division on devolution cut short last night (Tuesday, 12th June), they decided to try a stunt by attempting to call a division in the middle of PMQ’s. No doubt when they thought of it, they were patting themselves on the back for coming up with such a jolly wheeze. To us normal, intelligent people though, it was nothing more than an immature act of petulance. Surprisingly, Bercow did his job for once and expelled the parliamentary SNP’s leader, Ian Blackford from the chamber. This prompted the rest of Irn Bru Crew to walk out of the chamber, pointing and jeering at the Tories as they did so.

    I can understand them being upset about a division on what, in their minds, is a vitally important, life or death issue being cut short, but to pull a stunt like that and then compound it by all of them walking out after their leader was rightly expelled AND hurl abuse at the Tories, is not just an insult and an act of naked contempt for democracy, it’s downright fucking childish and pathetic. Apparently, they consider Brexit to be nothing more than a power grab, designed to destabilise the Scottish parliament. Blackford even claimed that ‘powers are being grabbed back’ from Edinburgh, though what those powers were he didn’t say. He also claimed that last night’s debate on Brexit laws was a ‘democratic outrage’. So what was today’s ludicrous attempt to disrupt PMQ’s, followed by a petulant mass walk out? And they have the nerve to claim THEY were disrespected.

    It kind of makes you wonder what they’re doing there in the first place, considering they despise the British parliament and everyone in it who isn’t SNP. Did they think they were being clever? Did they think they were hurting their fellow MP’s? They weren’t. They only people they’re hurting are their constituents, because for the rest of today at least, they have no representation in parliament, because there was nobody on the SNP benches to ask any of their questions. And of course, there’s no show without Wee Jimmy Krankie, who announced that she was right behind Blackford, and accused Westminster of treating Scotland with contempt. Westminster was doing no such thing, but the SNP certainly deserve to be treated with contempt, because they can rarely sit in the commons without one of them disrespecting democracy by doing something pathetic and/or ridiculous.

    The SNP are like a real life version of the muppets, led by their very own Miss Piggy, Sturgeon. They despise the English and are a single issue party, Scottish independence, and they couldn’t even achieve that when they had their ‘once in a life time’ independence referendum four years ago. The majority of Scots voted to remain in the Union. However, just like remainers, they have been unable to accept that democracy was done, and Sturgeon is now, once again waffling on about a second independence referendum. If it happens, it should be a UK wide referendum. I’m willing to bet that the English and Welsh would vote to grant the SNP their wish. The big problem, that never mention when talking about independence, is that they don’t actually want an independent Scotland. They have this fantasy that once they split from the UK, they will be welcomed with open arms by the EU. So basically, they don’t want to be governed by a British (in their view, a foreign government) for another foreign government, that unlike Westminster, does even have the decency to allow its citizens to elect it. The SNP really are a bunch of cunts.

    • It was heartwarming to see their bench empty though, if only for half a day.

      Shame they don’t fuck off permanently… like Sinn Fein.

      • I concur, but it would be better for all if they fucked off permanently (taking Wee Jimmy and her entire band of uber-morons with them) to somewhere furth of the United Kingdom. I hear that Syria’s quite nice at this time of year…

        • I can never forget every time that cunt John Bercow announced the German speaking SNP cunt Angus Robertson

    • How DARE you compare Miss Piggy to the Dreghorn puffer-fish ??!

      The bundle of porcine pulchritude is well do-able, streets ahead of any Kardashicunts et al.

Comments are closed.