The BAFTAs [3]

Oh fuck no! Get in from a lovely day on the links, fish supper in hand, settle down in front of the idiot lantern (before Morpheus wisps me away in a sea air fuelled slumber), and fuck me it’s the BARF-TA awards.

All the birds done out in bin bags to show support to the mass hysteria of #pleasepleasepleaseincludemetoo why don’t the cunts just wear burkahs and tick two virtue-signalling boxes in one fell swoop.

Needless to say the EE new talent was the cunt playing the black panther. He’s also nominated for best actor for his turn in “Get Out” – which was half-decent but not BARF-TA or Oscar material – but I doubt he’ll win that when Oldman is doing Churchill (you know that racist cunt who saved the whole if Europe from Germany, just so that Germany could gift it to “peaceful” cunts 65yrs later). But who knows in this fucked up day and age.

Also why is every award twosome I’ve seen thus far of the “Modern TV Advert Family/Couple” variety? I mean for fuck’s sake ABBC talk about force-feeding unreality down every cunt’s throat! And I’m paying for the fucking privileged!!! 😠😠😠

……Oh! – and notice the sideways snip at FX cunts by the “actors” not to model them in the future!

‘Cos those cunts know their time is short before studio bosses pay a one-off fee to use their image and then fuck them off, and their demands, and their tantrums, and their not turning up for a day’s work cos they’re “not in the right place today”.

No that’s baaaad, but importing cheap scum labour to keep indigenous wages low and replacing real people with real live lives (and manufacturing jobs) with robots is perfectly ok with them! Two Faced elitist cunts!

……and the Jackson Five with fiddles doing the eulogy tribute music. I mean COME ON!!!!!

Fuck off BARF-TA you cunts and God cunt the United Cunts of AL-BB-CERA!!! Fucking box-ticking, virtue-signalling, neo-liberal fascist cunts!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

Nominated by Rebel without a Cunt!

48 thoughts on “The BAFTAs [3]

  1. Cannot stand anything to do with actor award ceremonies.

    Self opinionated overpaid back slapping cunts who do little work (although they will tell you differently) for a shit load of money. Few great actors around these days in my opinion. Speeches usually just boring endless platitudes.

    Over the years I have also come to detest Joanna Lumley, her stupid voice just gets on my tits, cannot bear to listen to it. An immediate channel change, even for her fucking advert voiceovers. Not forgetting to mention the waste of potentially £50m of taxpayers money for the ridiculous now defunct Garden Bridge Project.

    • Fack me !!

      Would I like to kick Plastic-Bumley full-on in the gob ??

      Aggravating, gurning old splosher.

  2. BAFTA awards again hey? so I guess they’ll call up Stephen French Fry and get him a round of rent boys on the house so he would host and shoot his gob again

    • Did you know Norman Salma Hayek is only 3 feet tall? Small but oh so perfectly formed!!
      So impressed was I by her that I went to wickes and bought a stepladder Just in case she ever fancied giving me a BJ whilst I was standing……
      Alas 20 years on its still unused!!
      I fuckin hate actors!! Like many musicians they are always piping up about absolutely everything!! Listen Cunts just go and do your jobs and shut the fuck up about everything else!!
      Just because you act or sing it doesn’t make you a fucking expert on all the worlds woes…..

      • Exactly. Just because they mouth other people’s words for a over paid living doesn’t make them an authority on every fucking subject under the sun. Cunts.

  3. Have no problem with it because I don’t watch it or any awards shite. They don’t make grown up films anymore and most of telly stuff is poor or very poor indeed. Some exceptions, but not many.

    • I make you right Cunstable. I watch so little telly these days that when my license came up for renewal in Nov I was thinking about getting rid of it. Then I remembered the World Cup was coming up so I forked out.
      All I watch these days are history programmes and the occasional old film. It’s shit really.

      • What’s the matter with ya? There’s always Judge Judy and Come Dine With Me… Moaning fucking Minnie.

        • Well, you’ve seen one Judge Judy
          and you’ve seen them all and that dining shit is just a load of snobby up their own arse wankers. I have enough of cunts like that in real life thanks.

          • Did you see that Judge Judy with the cunt who didn’t like his Linda Blair tattoo? Hilarious.

    • Agree Cuntsable, Lets just think about the future of female actresses for a moment . If these stupid cunts get their way and no more women will be able to get an acting career simply by opening their legs anymore that means the only ones to get through ‘should’ be the ones that have an ability to act. Now if you look at the present bunch and not many of them can act to save their lives , it makes you wonder how they got there ????? The same talentless tarts are all wearing black . Old Harvey must be shouting Fucking Hypocrites .

      • Judging by the female leads on most films these days most actresses are given the roles because of the way they look, and not whether they have any acting ability.

  4. Cunt opens envelope and reads out name of cunt number 2.

    Cunt then hands small statue to cunt number 2.

    Cunt number 2 now expects a couple of million more for next role because he/she now has a small statue.

    I think that’s how it works….

    • Didn’t need to watch the show after that accurate description!
      I felt like I was actually there…. 😂

  5. Baftas,Oscars,thatre awards,t.v. awards…all just a bunch of self-indulgent bollocks. I never know who most of the Cunts are,and if I do know them,it’d a fair bet that I dislike/disapprove of them. No other industry has a televised award show,you don’t see plumbers or barbers having award shows,that’s because noone cares. I live in hope that eventually all those arty-farty types drown in a vat of their own self-satisfied,smug bullshit.
    I,too,detest that crypt-escapee, Lumley,she’ll get my size 10 boot up her rancid old kipper-box if I ever get close enough to the fucked-out,prehistoric bag.

    • One looks like a fourth-rate porn player, the other a right splosher.

      Trying to fathom which way round.

          • I originally posted something to that effect, including a reference to a certain liquid dripping from the younger slag’s chin onto her tits. But the post got mysteriously removed…

  6. It’s a sad day whenever someone feels the need to publicly announce LOUDLY what a great and smashing job they’ve apparently done.
    Unless of course you’ve just cured cancer or AIDS.
    Regular old artistes ? Sorry guys, shit out of luck you vain, desperately hollow turds.
    Fuck off you cunts.

  7. Off topic sort of but just seen trailer on Albeeb for new series of masterchef. Noticed a nadia- a-like contestant so no point watching now as already know the winner, cunts.

  8. If all of those slappers in black dresses ( 210 ) got shagged by Weinstain, then he is my absolute fucking hero

    • They are more intellectually in line with me. I hope they’ve rimmed A C Graylings toothbrush.

    • Hey Shitcake! Pay attention…I posted a link to that story when in first came out in The Sun. The Anna Soubry cunting to be precise.

      Whose turn to fuck off is it now you plagerising cunt?


      • Dear Admin,

        Shitcake is being a cunt.

        1. He is not keeping up with his daily cuntings.

        2. He is horning in on other cunter’s cuntings.

        3. He is stealing material from other cunter’s cuntings.

        And most egregious of all:

        4. Instead of calling another cunter a cunt, he told them (me) to fuck off.

        Cuntspectively yours,

        General Cuntster, USA, Retired, Deceased

        PS. Hugs and kisses to Mrs. Admin.

        • I’ll have you know I gave up railroad gin years ago. Now I drink only the finest…Guzzler’s Gin…distilled fresh everyday.

          • Can you get tonic water in Indiana General?

            In the UK find it goes remarkably well with gin. With ice and a slice of lemon.

          • My Dear Mr. Stroker…ahem…

            …fill mixing glass with ice. Add 3 parts gin…1 part dry vermouth and stir gently so as not to bruise the molecules.

            Pour through strainer into a martini glass. Add olive. Garnish with lemon. Enjoy.

            Repeat as often as necessary.”

  9. I can’t actually look at these cunts and this shit withouy becoming angry and visibly agitated. How the world has changed 🙁

  10. Didn’t the silly slags drag along a real heroine or two (careful, that’s a gender specific word, but I think I’ll get away with it for some reason), to look even more virtuous in the eyes of plebland? Some ex Ford workers who went on strike once, some dreadful lgbtq thingumy and worst of all Naiome Harries brought the despicable Afua Hurch or whatever her fucking name is. Heroine? To who? Nobody British that’s for sure.
    I can’t imagine many people watch these shitty awards shows anyway, but I’m sure even less are going to watch them if they are just going to grab the gold, and lecture the audience on whatever right on cause of the day is.

    • The Ford sewing machinists strike worked well as they now don’t make anything that needs sewing in the Dagenham plant just engines and in the pictures I’ve seen not many women involved.
      Equal pay takes equal commitment knowing you are likely to take 18 months out in five years on maternity leave doesn’t sit well at an interview. A bit like a scuzzy know nothing fresh out of uni or knuckle dragging tattooed ape wouldn’t be my first choice of employee. (I’m tattooedmyself) but needed a bit of balance. But scream #MeToo and that’s all it takes. Cunts

      • In Japan the employer is allowed by law to state exactly the criteria of the potential candidate.

        Can specify which sex, age and anything else they care to choose.

        After all they are paying h the salary and have a right to choose whoever they want.

        No wasted time and money for both parties regarding applicants turning up at interview who the employers have no interest in employing.

        Easy and straightforward.

  11. I reckon I’m right behind the #MeToo campaign. As in ‘would ya? Yeah not half, yeah, #MeToo’💪🏻

        • Kendall 85… Still one of the greatest teams I ever saw… Big Nev, Sharp and Gray, Reid, Ratcliffe etc… They would piss on that current Citeh side and they’d just steamroller the current United one…

        • FK shaggable in the Good Life, in 1975 or whenever it was.

          40+ years on she is reminiscent of one of those marmoset monkies but with a wrinkly, atrophied head.

      • I think a lot of people fancied a pop at Felicity Kendal.

        Not appreciative of her when in the Good Life however 40 years later find her incredibly sexy

  12. Isn’t Gwyneth Paltrow due for another cunting? I remember her embarrassing performance at one award ceremony causing one journalist to comment ‘she made me feel ashamed to be British’.

    • I seem to remember a picture with a horrid wrinkly face…
      Like a welly that had melted next to a gas fire.

Comments are closed.