Trekkies

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Star Trek fans are pretty fucking mental, they could tell you the star date captain Kirk farted in season 1 episode 9.

Star Trek is shite. The premise “explore new worlds and not interfere with other worlds.” They break this prime directive every episode and then are found to be in mortal peril.

The solution is always a variant of:
rerouting, inverting or generating a sub space field or the warp core inverters/manipulating the plasma flow is the ways above.
the end

Fucking wank, on a par with Dr Who,

Nominated by: Peter Griffin

41 thoughts on “Trekkies

  1. Not forgetting the formulaic cross series episodes involving:

    Nazi aliens.
    Cowboy aliens.
    Main character dead, but not dead. (Like my last pick of five).
    Slimey/ blobby/ gaseous super alien (But not Prescott).
    Inter species/racial snog fest.

    And as you say the tossers that dress up and re-enact any of the above.

    Cunts!

    Old Trec script writers don’t die they go to work on The Archers.

    Cunty fanny-fenacle peddling whore mongers.

  2. “…the voyages of Enterprise. It’s ongoing mission – to boldly go and invade every TV channel in every country in the world. To go where no sci-fi cunt has gone before”.

  3. The writers of Star Trek always seemed to be trying to make some moral point.
    Blake’s 7 was the best sci-fi show.

    • I liked Avon… Proper nasty cunt, he was….

      My favourite sci-fi series when I was a kid was Space 1999… Only the first series though… The second one was yankyfied wank…

      • Agreed Norman. Series 1 was heavily influenced both in tone and visually by Kubrick’s 2001 A Space Odyssey, series 2 was restyled by an American (Ugh!) producer to resemble Star Trek in cast and format, and was indeed shit! U.F.O also deserves an honorable mention despite looking hopelessly dated by the time 1980 actually got there and was a sincere attempt to create an adult Sci-Fi series. And Lt Ellis was seriously hot!

      • I recently bought the DVD of UFO, I must be going through a bit of a nostalga for my childhood, so I remember the planes and spaceships, but not the female characters lol

        But yes, she was hot

        Think it’s a good Sci-fi program, a bit dark and no real winners

      • I’m too young (just) to have watched Space 1999 the first time it aired. But I’ve watched the repeats, and I’ve downloa…err…bought the boxsets of both seasons.The Eagle is the coolest fucking spaceship ever. And the most realistic. My claim to geek fame is that I have a scale model of each version of the Eagle.

    • 7 Was good but I like Battlestar Galactica/Galactica 1980 and early Dr.who as well. Trekkies go crazy for the show cause it predicted or foresaw a change in medical advancements in healthcare. Also most trekkies live their life based on the show have a trekkie marriage practically living the show as a religious obsessed cult. Trekkies also want to have buttsex with william shatner and spock, both of them are cunts and have charged braindead fans alot of money for autographs very rude and self centered if you ask me.

    • Blake’s 7 was a good show, though I didn’t like the very last episode. Thinking back now though, I suppose it was different to have the bad guys win in the end. Being a young boy at the time I don’t really remember the early episodes, I’ve seen them since though. And the image of that federation trooper that used to appear during the opening credits really scared the shit out of me. I think it went a bit shit when the Liberator was destroyed.

      • Blake’s 7 was/is ace. The fourth series was a bit of an afterthought.

        Had to ban my wife from the TV room when I watched the whole box set a couple of years ago because she kept laughing at the crap sets.

        Tom Baker is still God.

  4. Loved early Dr.Who, bu they never adequately replaced Tom Baker…. That Nathan Turner cunt (The Steven Moffat of his day) replacing Barry Letts fucked it up too…

    Eccleston showed promise in 2005, but after that it was just the same old shite….Tennant and Smith chewing the scenery, a PC/gay angle to a lot of stories, every sidekick has to be a bloody cockney (That Martha one, Billie Piper, Catherine Fucking Tate)… Now Capaldi has to deal with a lot of bollocks… The moon is an egg? The Master is a woman? For fuck’s sake… The only good post Eccleston bits were John Simm’s Master and Amy Pond…. One for his acting ability, the other because I want to give her one..

    • Can you imagine any of the new Dr Whos standing up and urging the Thals to rise up and give the Daleks a proper kicking, William Hartnell style? Wouldn’t be considered “appropriate” nowadays. Really showing my age now BTW….

      • And the companions (Amy apart) are now crap… No Carol Ann Ford, Katy Manning or Elisabeth Sladen any more… No Leela attacking people with a big knife… No Jamie McCrimmon threatening baddies with his dagger… River Song? Clara? That lizard woman and cockney housemaid lezzer couple? What a load of bollocks…

      • Blagged a DVD copy of “Genesis of the Daleks” recently. Apart from a couple of ropey effects it’s powerful stuff, streets ahead of modern Who in content and acting performances esp Michael Wisher as a genuinely terrifying Davros. A posthumous cunting for Mary Whitehouse is surely worthwhile seeing as she complained about this story more than any other….

    • They missed a trick by opting for Sylvester McCoy instead of the late, great Ken Campbell who was apparently in the running.

  5. More cunts on The Voice…. Now there’s Boy George and Paloma Faith…. Check the BBC hompage for the pic of Faith… I thought it was that bloke who used to drum for The Bay City Rollers…

      • Yep he’s a nonce he was caught with Twenty-two videos of child porn and 1,000 images of sexual pics of kids. He of course blames it on a imaginary american friend yeah right.I hate when a friend stashs child porn and takes off without telling you.. what a cunt of course he’s lying. Norm Paloma Faith is a female singer the bay city roller drummer nonce is called Derek Longmuir and Boy George is that poof from culture club shite new wave group http://www.theguardian.com/uk/2000/mar/24/3 Also lead singer Les McKeown of BCR is supposedly gay or bi.

    • I cried when George Best left United when I was a little nipper… I didn’t expect to fly across the world and fucking meet him though…

  6. What the fuck is Eric Pollard from Emmerdale doing having a good time with these Trekkie cunts? Shouldn’t he be mournig his dead wife?! Disrespectful cunt….

  7. Best space programme of the lot was Fireball XL5. Robert the robot and Zoony were fucking brilliant.

  8. At least Kirk & co shot anything that moved or beat it to shit with a stick A lot better than that pile of next generation shite where the aliens have feelings to you know and need counselling and therapy
    I did like tomorrows people as a kid until they came up with the “bubble skin jump suit” episodes

    • That was the only one I saw and it scared the shit out of me. Seriously, I had nightmares for ages after that.

    • Next Generation was also nicknamed “Cap’n Slaphead and his Politically Correct Warriors” in certain circles….

  9. Emergency cunting.

    Calais immigrants

    That no politicians have taken any significant steps to prevent the Calais base immigrant invasions that have been taking place, I can only deduce that the obliteration of British society is government policy.

    In the age of the internet and mobile phones, the illegal fuckers in our country can pass the message loud and clear that if you do get your feet on British soil, it is very unlikely that you will ever be deported, even if you are caught for stealing, raping or murdering.

    It is an absolute and utter fucking disgrace that nothing substantive is ever done about it.

    With the EU and the UN actively persuading European countries to accept more and more of these migrant cunts, because it is “honourable, decent, and compassionate”, do they not consider those same feelings for us poor natives whose countries are being systematically invaded?

    The EU and the UN are in effect propping each other up. EU leaders are more concerned about what other leaders think than about the people they claim to represent.

    Not enough people care to make a difference and the levers of power are firmly in the hands of those who wish us indigenous white British extinction.

    When a society loses its patriotism it doesn’t become a fluffy, love everyone society it merely becomes the shit-manure in which another stronger culture takes hold and grows.

    It very much looks as though not only does the government not care about our security, vis-à-vis the potential for jihady-terrorists and other dangerous migrant cunts arriving in the UK, but they don’t care about maintaining the welfare state, education and hospitals, all of which have been collapsing under the pressure of this increasing migrant invasion since the Blair government of 1997.

    Anyone in the country illegally should immediately be sent back full stop. And fuck all your farsical international “human rights” excuses.

    The government currently appears to have abandoned its responsibility here, and along with it the duty to protect its citizens from these criminal immigrant fuckers.

    What we have, in effect, is a traitor government for immigrants paid for by British taxpayers.

    Fuck you all British traitor government minister cunts. Fuck you all immigrant cunts.

    • Seconded. I would also add Fat/White Dee to the list of traitorous cunts who support those filthy fucking parasites in Calais, (no, not the French).

  10. I’d like to nominate Tessa Jowell for a right good cunting. This is the woman, you will remember, who together with her husband laundered the proceeds of crime via a mortgage which Jowell signed the application form for. When it was subsequently shown in an Italian court that this money had been an illegal bung paid to her bent lawyer fly boy husband by non other than arch corrupt criminal Silvio Berlusconi and which led to her husband being convicted, Jowell staged a false separation from him whilst publicity proclaiming his innocence. Now why the fuck she would leave him if she thought he was innocent has never been fully explained though it does show you what a cunt she is if she is prepared to throw her husband under a bus to save her career. She also claimed she did not realise what she was signing to distance herself from the money laundering scheme her husband was ‘innocent’ of. Needless to say the separation was faked. Now the deceitful cow wants to become the Mayor of London. Fuck Off she is having a laugh.

  11. I’ll admit to liking Star Trek. But I don’t wear any uniforms from any of the series or movies, I don’t do the Vulcan live long and fuck off sign, I don’t own a toy phaser or a tricorder, I don’t attend any conventions, I have no idea how the fucking stardate system works, nor do I give fuck one, and I certainly don’t know a single fucking word of Klingon. Though I WILL admit to finding Alice Krige as the Borg Queen somewhat attractive. To me, it’s something to watch when there’s fuck all else on. Babylon 5 is better though.

  12. The good news: there’s a shitload of Daleks in the new Doctor Who series (including the classic 1960s ones!)….

    The bad news: Steven Moffat has written it…

    The badder news: he’s introducing yet another ‘mysterious’ female character (the web knobends are wetting themselves because it’s some bird from Game Of Thrones)… So we’ll have to endure all that ‘Who is River Song/Clara crap all over again….

    The worst news: The Master is still a silly tart/Mary Poppins clone and that irritating cow (the Doctor fangeek who is actually in the series, that Osgood character) is still alive…. What a load of dog turd….

  13. Last night’s Doctor Who was better than I thought it would be…. Capaldi is good as The Doc. loads of Daleks being bastards and Davros was fucking ace… The only drawback was that Clara wasn’t killed…

    Still not keen on the idea of a female Master…. But I would love to hear Missy talk dirty…

    • I haven’t seen it yet but I appreciate the old series alot more. The new doctor kind of irritates me but that’s my problem, he’s less humorous and more off-putting I think. Speaking of daleks did you know there was a band from the 80’s called Dalek I love you? Ha found this out 3 months back looking at Adam Ants wiki. Only heard Afew songs so far but they aren’t that bad from what I heard. https://youtu.be/QHdUXr7xBb0

      • Cheers for the link, TS…Wasn’t Chris Hughes (aka Merrick) in Dalek I Love You? Chris went on to be a renowned producer (his work with Tears For Fears is particularly well known)…. Lots of Daleks in last night’s episode… Including the classic silver ones from the 60s… They seem popular…. Here’s a poll done after the show:

        Which was your favourite Dalek(s) in The Witch’s Familiar?
        You have already voted. So far…
        Here are the results:

        The black Dalek 8%

        The bronze Daleks 10%

        The ‘classic’ blue and silver Daleks 32%

        The (red) Dalek Supreme 17%

        The Special Weapons Dalek 26%

        The ‘sewer’ Daleks, not in their ‘shells’. 6%

      • No problem anytime, no Chris Hughes produced dalek I love first album but he is a multi-intrusmentalist . Although he was the drummer and producer of Adam & the ants 2 last albums. David Hughes(keyboard) is in Dalek but is unrelated to Chris he produced their 1st album though. Classic and Dalek Supreme are my favorite Dalek’s 3rd would probably be black and bronze looked pretty cool as well.

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