Rik Mayall


Bugger it to hell! Missed another dead cunt…

News yesterday that Rik Mayall died at the age of 56. Now you might say that one should not speak ill of the dead, but I’m having none of that. As far as I’m concerned the seriously unfunny cunt is now just a seriously unfunny dead cunt. Simples!

Seen above, Mayall is pictured with another seriously unfunny cunt, Ade Edmonson. Apparently they used to be great mates until they fell out. Don’t know over what, but could it possibly be that someone suggested they do something that’s actually funny?

Nominated by: Dioclese

And while we’re at it :

This is a pre-emptive re-cunting of Stephen Fry as I’m sure it’s only a matter of minutes before he posts something about Rik Mayall’s death on Twitter.

Nominated by: Fred West

18 thoughts on “Rik Mayall

  1. Its time to Cunt Qatar.

    I’m sick of the every cunt that has NOT been paid by the Camel Jockeys, now crying that it may be rigged. Really, you think so?

    Or is it because Doha is the place every cunt really wants to go to – in the middle of summer – between the Gas fields and the biggest Foriegn US Base cam?

    Perhaps its just that it is such a sporting nation? If you didn’t want them to win, don’t fucking enter them.

    If the best cunts the UK could send in for this was That Cunt that will be King, William, and that cunt that thinks he is king, Beckham – who between them could buy a fucking beer let alone a load of votes – they deserve a pasting.

    To them they are the UK – they own the Shart Tower, Olympic Village, Sainsburys, Harrods (Which the cunts use as a car park for all the lambos they drive in circles) and 50 percent of Public Listed Companies. At least the UK is safe against a building attack as the cunts own all of the rest worth taking out as well as the planes that would go in.

    Without Gas these cunts couldn’t even make a fucking coffee. With it, they are buying and paying off every cunt that bows to them and mighty allah.

    FIFA is the cream on this fucking cake. The farce started well before.

    Allah Akbar


    • That corrupt fat old cunt, Sepp Blatter is now trying to play he race card: Saying that those who want an investigation are racist…

      Most people think a lot of bribes and back handers were involved in Qatar getting the World Cup. Nobody wants to play in 100 degree heat. Nobody wants the tournament held in the winter (and disrupting the domestic season)… So how is that in any way racist?

      Nah! Sounds like the dodgy old FIFA cunt is on the ropes… Blatter is clutching at more straws than a wanking scarecrow…

      • The same politically correct Sepp Blatter who said that women’s football would be more popular if they played in really short shorts? Surely not?

  2. To be fair the Wik cunt did raise a laugh when he broke his neck whilst riding a quad bike. Every “alternative comedian” should have one

    • A good idea, Sir… FIFA are cunts: a bunch of old relics with corruption festering in every corner of their organization…. Qatar is bad enough, but FIFA also gave the nod to Russia (another corrupt country, run by corrupt people and full of corrupt money)… One can only imagine how many huge envelopes full of cash were involved in both nominations. The fact that FIFA gave the current tournament to Brazil is also questionable… OK there’s the myth and the glamour of Brazil (Pele, Zico and all that), but they’re still doing work on the stadiums for fuck’s sake!

  3. Has anyone cunted French and Saunders?
    If not, they should have been up there years ago.
    Absolutely fucking shite, every sketch, every one of their wee song and dance routine skits. Fuck me, I’d rather be Rik Mayall now than be forced to watch anything they did, have done or do in the future.

  4. On the subject of tennis players, I always thought about giving Chris Evert one when I was watching Wimbledon as a young lad….

    • I agree, but for me the bubble burst when Steffi Graf came on the scene. It really ruins the moment when you think “wait, isn’t that Jurgen Klinsmann in a short skirt?”

      • Yeah, Graf wasn’t a favourite of mine, either…

        That Maria Sharapova though… I wonder if she makes those noises elsewhere?

  5. The daily Mail

    Not sure if this a nom, or a declaration of love for how ridiculous their reporting is becoming. They ran a story a few days ago declaring that people are going to die as a result of an invasion of asian hornets entering the country. Apparently these illegal hornet immigrants have caused 50 deaths in France already,and are coming for our british honey bees. However, they failed to mention that they will be putting our hard working british hornets out a job. That is just sloppy semi racist scare mongering journalism and they really need to work harder

    • The Daily Mail (and especially its cuntly editor, Paul Dacre) is the biggest cunt in Fleet Street. Regularly topping the PCC’s list of most complained about newspapers by a massive majority, few complaints actually succeed in achieving corrections or redress because of the influence that the Cunt Dacre wields over the PCC. Did you know that The Daily Mail’s use of private investigators to illegally “blag” private data was far more widespread than at the News of The World, Sun or Mirror? When they’re not totally disregarding facts, the Mail twists, distorts and shamelessly LIES to suit Dacre’s extreme right-wing agenda. Watch the Mail tell you that the “new” Press watchdog IPSO is Leveson-compliant and will protect the public from the the worst excesses of the press… WRONG. By independent analysis, IPSO is NOT Leveson-compliant at all – even the old PCC was more Leveson-compliant than IPSO. IPSO is designed to protect the newspapers’ right to lie, distort, bully and harass without fear of sanction. And who is a major player behind the scenes at IPSO? You’ve guessed it – Cuntmeister-In-Chief of the Daily Mail, Paul Dacre. Leveson said, rightly, that the new press watchdog should be independent of both politicians AND the press. Remember how the press screams and shouts every time politicians have the temerity even to publicly express an opinion on press reform? “This isn’t what Leveson wanted,” they wail! Yet, the press apparently has no trouble in going against pretty much everything else Leveson recommended and then shamelessly LIES to the public that the new scheme is Leveson-compliant. Can you imagine any other industry where, had there been as much rampant criminality and abuse as we’ve witnessed in Fleet Street, the press would be happy for that industry to continue marking their own homework? Of course not. There would be daily front page demands for heads to roll and a new, tough, independent regulator. SO WHY WON’T THESE LYING, HYPOCRITICAL, SCUMBAG CUNTS ACCEPT THE SAME FOR THEMSELVES? PAUL DACRE SHOULD BE HUNG AND THE DAILY MAIL IS THE BIGGEST CUNT IN FLEET STREET. Oh, and in the 1930’s, the Mail published editorials praising and supporting Adolf…

  6. The Mail is the definitive cunt’s newspaper… Anyone who isn’t from ‘Middle England’ or a Tory (or the fucking McCanns!) is ‘scum’ or fair game. When that Shannon Matthews story happened, The Mail screamed about it being a product of ‘The Scrounging Classes’ and ‘Benefits Britain’. Yet when those McCann cunts leave three very tiny kids alone in a foreign country while Gerry and Kateypoos partied and got pissed, there was no mention of the McCann’s shitty antics being a yardstick for ‘Middle Class Britain’, was there? Utter hypocrites and total cuntwipes… Paul Dacre should be shot….

    George R. R Martin is a cunt….
    Firstly the pretentious ‘R.R’ thing… Maybe he doesn’t want people to confuse him with the Beatles producer? But it’s more like he wants to be like J. R. R. Tolkien (or Wile . E. Coyote!). Then there’s that ‘Game Of Thrones’ shite… It’s total bollocks: it’s just badly ripped off and rehashed Tolkein stories with lots of violence, bloodshed, incest and shagging (the incest bit also shows that old ‘R.R’ is also a sick old cunt!). Another way to look at Game Of Thrones is to see it as EastEnders or Brookside with swords and sorcery… It’s amazing how people can make millions of dollars out of steaming piles of crap like Game Of Thrones…

  7. His wife said, “we don’t know what happened” to a reporter, as she was on her way to Barbados with Delroy Bignob.

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