Luis Suarez


Luis Suarez is a cunt. Not for soring against England (I don’t give a fuck about that), he is just a an utter copper bottomed cunt.

The media are also cunts: The fuckwits on ITV are more offended by Suarez biting somebody (again!) than Suarez racially abusing a fellow professional (like he did to Partice Evra). Suarez is a racist bastard and a vicious little cunt…

( Nice teeth, tho’ – Ed. )

Nominated by: Norman Whiteside

23 thoughts on “Luis Suarez

  1. Surely it’s ABH or even GBH to bite some fucker. But of course reality ceases to exist in the gold urinal, Bentley Coupe infested world of the supercunts that are professional footballers. He is the pus in the boil that is professional football…And he’s got a face like roadkill. A Cunt indeed!

  2. He doesn’t like going to Germany because people keep saying ‘bitter’ to him.

    • Droll.
      How’s ’bout saying that in Cockney argot – replacing the two t‘s with a glottal stop and ignoring the terminal r


      Saying it in a vile Masshole accent:

      Please to notice, these two are closer to the German word you imply.
      Das ist gut?

        • I’m not familiar with that idiom.
          Please to elaborate
          If you should mean by ‘get in the oven’, pull a Sylvia Plath, well, I can’t do that. We don’t use coal-gas any longer, it’s LNG now – not lethal.
          I’m willing to abide your wishes otherwise.

  3. By calling Mr. Suarez an “utter copper-bottomed cunt”, are you not also “racially abusing” the little, brown man? Not the “cunt” bit, he’s obviously one of those and no racial, or otherwise, derision is implied or should be inferred with that deserved appellation. Not the “copper-bottomed” bit either. Research tells me that that idiom “copper-bottomed” is nautical in origin and actually means: “Genuine; trustworthy.” Your abuse rests in your misspelling of the word “udder”. You’re calling him a “non-white corporeal mass sporting a pairing of from two to four teats”, right?

    • It used to be illegal to queen the cunt – you know, back in Oscar Wilde’s day – but I think now, as long as the cunt is over the age of consent, you can queen them ’til the kine come home!

  4. Nah! All royalty are cunts…. They’re German, for a start….

    Just seen bit of that Glastonbury… Full of hippy cunts of course (and BBC coverage presented by two total bellends!). Blondie? When I think of what they used to be… Debbie Harry has just said “I can’t control myself” Well, she is 68 now. So it’s only natural…

    Wouldn’t mind being on the tour bus with Haim though, if you get my unsavoury drift…

    • “…….Debbie Harry has just said “I can’t control myself” Well, she is 68 now. So it’s only natural……”


      Once I had control and it was a gas
      Soon turned out had bladder of glass(radio)
      Soon turned out to be a pain in the ass(album)
      Seemed like a one-off, only to find
      Incontinent, nappies behind

      Will this pass muster Dioclese?

      • Wait!
        It seems this Blondie joke exists on two different posts. I thought you had deleted my contribution.
        Ignore me, my medications are contra-indicating at present.

  5. Lily Allen is a talentless, tone deaf, ugly gobshite cunt…. When the silly bitch said she was ‘retiring’ from the music industry, I thought it was too good to be true….

    Her freeloading, pisspot, professional celebrity, can’t act for shit dad is a cunt too…

  6. All God-Botherers are cunts.

    Allow me to paint a picture of a typical God-Botherer, fellow cunters:

    “I’m a sad, social inadequate who has never got over discovering that Father Christmas and the Tooth Fairy don’t exist. Rather than taking responsibility for my own actions in an unmoral universe, or at least trying to create some meaning in my life, I need a fully worked out belief system given to me in easy to digest mental yoghurt servings. Fortunately, I have discovered that there is a magical sky daddy (WHO JUST LOVES ME SOOOOOO MUCH) who will take all that pesky thinking out of my life. I just have to give money to the daddy pushers (sorry, priests) and follow the rules he allegedly gave out in various books of fairy stories dating back to the Bronze Age. And the best things about the sky daddy? He hates all those nasty, confusing things I hate – books, ideas, the followers of other sky daddies who just don’t exist. How do I know other sky daddies don’t exist? Mine told me so.”

    It gets on my fucking tits the “respect” we are supposed to give to religious fucktards. The malign influence has even spread into politics in the UK; after years of sneering at the mad antics across the Atlantic, UK politicians are now keen to show themselves as “people of faith.” FUCK OFF WITH THAT SHIT. If anything, religion should exclude anyone from holding a position that involves more responsibility than a lollipop lady.

    Religion has always been about money and about telling other people what to do. It has got fuck all to do with God. Leave God out of religion! He’s up there in heaven, quietly not existing. He’d be horrified if he knew what was done in his name, but I suppose non-existence is even more blissful than the ignorance of most of his followers.

    Judaism is typical Bronze Age garbage that a semi-literate and barely-civilised tribe uses to justify its violence towards outsiders. Basically, the Old Testament says “our god is a double-hard bastard who can kick your god in the nuts so fucking give us your birds and your dough.” And when things aren’t going so well? We need to be even more cuntish in our crazy devotion to our tribal deity. If there had been airplanes in the first century, you can imagine some crazy Jewish cunt piloting one right up the Roman Emperor’s forum (yes, this is an ass joke).

    Eventually, some Jews got fed up being bosses of some desert shithole in the middle of nowhere and wanted to expand their horizons. So they picked up a commonplace idea from the civilised Greeks around them – the idea of the resurrected godman. So successful was this fusion of Jewish self-belief with Greek storytelling that, allied with ludicrous amounts of childish wishful thinking, Christianity became the top form of godbothering, ever.

    But, for sheer craziness and fanatical devotion to insane ideas, the followers of the mindless cult of Islam take the biscuit. Millions of pages have been written on the nature of morality but Muslims believe that an illiterate, epileptic paedophile whose main contribution to theological thought was “Allah says I can fuck who I like, even if she’s my daughter in law or nine years old” is the perfect man and the last prophet. Twats.

    Allahu Akbah, you cunts.

  7. Luis Suarez is going to take over from Louis Walsh on X-Factor. Apparently Walsh can’t get a boner anymore to sodomize kids from local authority children’s homes, but Suarez has an abundance of spunk for the job.

  8. This overpaid cretin should be escorted to the nearest veterinary clinic to have his teeth removed, marched to a cell, charged with assault and thrown in an egyptian cell. The end.

    Oops, almost forgot. And he’s a cunt.

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