Nominations

Use the Comment section below to write up your cunting nomination.

The site admins will periodically review the nominations and will either:

βœ”οΈ schedule it to be published immediately or at a later date, OR
❌ bin it for any number of reasons

Either way, your nomination will disappear from this page.
That’s how you’ll know it’s been reviewed, so don’t ask.

If you want your cunting nomination published, follow the fucking rules:

[1] Whenever possible include a link to a recognised news source or risk πŸ—‘οΈ.
[2] Unsubstantiated allegations against living people or institutions results in πŸ—‘οΈ.
[3] Too short (less than 5 lines) or too long (more than 50 lines) qualifies it for πŸ—‘οΈ.
[4] Pay attention to grammar, spelling, punctuation, spacing. Unreadable equals πŸ—‘οΈ.
[5] Do not add comments to nominations unless specifically requested by an admin.
[6] Stop using the Nominations page to ask for things not to be nominated. Use the Contact Us page. That’s what it’s there for, otherwise πŸ—‘οΈ

 

Which leads us to a most important rule:
Respond appropriately to an admin comment within 2 days or guess what happens.
That’s right. It goes in the πŸ—‘οΈ.

LET’S GET CUNTING!

5 thoughts on “Nominations

  1. JAWS

    🦈

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-68909513

    Again, I`m not nominating sharks for a cunting – they just do what they do.
    To steal a quote from Jaws: “All this machine does is swim and eat and make little sharks and that’s all.”

    No, I`m cunting the morons who knowingly (or cretinously) enter shark-infested waters and then get bits bitten off. The ones that don`t have the common decency to be entirely consumed, that is.

    In any case, it`s easy to avoid shark attacks. Here are a few ideas – maybe YOU can do better? …
    β–  Stay dry: Sharks only attack people who are wet.
    β–  Dress up as a shark: They`re thick and won`t notice you.
    β–  Learn to read: That sign over there says Sharks – stay out of the water.

    I`ll leave you with a final quote: “You`re going to need a bigger boat.”
    (Said the French coast guard to the intended migrants).

  2. ‘Crackhead Barney’

    No, me neither; at least until a couple of days ago that is.

    For those of you not yet familiar with this bizarre apparition, ‘Crackhead’ describes herself as a ‘satirical performance artist and ambush interviewer’. ‘Crackhead’ has recently gained notoriety by ‘ambushing’ a rather sad and depressed looking Alec Baldwin in a coffee shop, where she harassed him with reference to the death on set gunshot incident a while ago, then demanded that he shout ‘Free Palestine’;

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4xewHJw3DM

    ‘Crackhead’ then appeared over here on the Piers Morgan show, where Morgan unsuccessfully tried to find out just what she was trying to achieve by having a go at Baldwin, only to be faced with an increasingly outlandlish display (the ‘interview’ proper starts at 16.20);

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ioR7O-xovE&t=1014s

    Now okay, some might regard this kind of ‘performance’ as a kind of anarchic humour. Fair do’s if that’s the case, but personally I found the attempt to hound a clearly distressed Baldwin to be pointless and unsavoury. There’s no wit or humour here. As for the Morgan ‘interview’, well there’s a minute or so’s worth of novelty value I suppose, before it becomes clear that ‘Crackhead’ is little more than a gross-out ‘shock jock’ provocateur, the proverbial one-trick pony with little or nothing more to offer.

    A bit pathetic really, don’t you think? Come back Dennis Pennis, all is forgiven.

  3. Yorkshire Predator Gangs

    Good Lord, how many more times are we going to be confronted by THIS?

    https://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/1893027/predators-abuse-rapists-kirklees-yorkshire

    Indeed, how many more such vile goings-on never see the light of day, with the criminals never being brought to justice?

    Maybe it’s just me, but I detect, shall we say, a certain pattern where the perpetrators are concerned. Perhaps I’m just not making sufficient allowance for ‘cultural differences’.

    Perhaps I’d better consider and check my thinking; I wouldn’t want anyone calling me ‘far right’…

  4. THE HOLE IN THE OZONE LAYER

    https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-68906013

    I write this piece at the end of a bollock-numbingly cold April, so I was curious to see how the BBC would spin this into their monthly Climate Catastrophe tripe. You know the type of thing – ‘Hottest April ever recorded in Timbuktu because of climate change’.

    Sadly, El Nino isn’t playing ball and they can’t find anywhere that’s slightly warmer than usual to hyperbolise. That means there’ll be no week-long jolly for Justin Rowland Rat to file a 2-minute report from somewhere exotic that’s spontaneously combusting. Poor Rowland, no free holiday for you this month.

    However the BBC’s Ministry of Truth is nothing if not resourceful, so congratulations to Winston Smith for disinterring this old chestnut. Yes, it’s our old friend the ozone hole which is so serious that seals are wearing Raybans and penguins are slapping on the Factor 30.

    Let’s let have a look at just one sentence from this garbage with my comments in brackets:
    A major cause of ozone loss (a natural process which occurs every autumn in the southern hemisphere) is believed to be (believed by whom, the Swedish mong?) the amount of smoke from unprecedented Australian wildfires (another natural phenomenon which has been occurring for millions of years) which were fuelled by climate change (mostly started by Aussie dickheads).

    Hole in the ozone layer? There’s probably a bigger hole in Rowland Rat’s arse as that’s what he talks out of.

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