For some unfathomable reason the delayed Euro 2020 soccer tournament is being held in the middle of a pandemic, touring the matches through 11 capitals to ensure that England is punished for Brexit by killing off as many people as possible when they all come streaming in to the country for the finals at Wembley.
If you’re one of the brain dead morons that’s dying for your footie ( literally? ), then this page is for you. Fill yer fucking boots here instead of polluting the main site with your drivel!
Dutch have got gaps I think the Czechs could sneak this on the break.
1
Lovely finish that.
1
Belgium never change. Fantastic team that does fuck all.
1
Like their chocolate 🍫….overrated 👎
1
On paper they’re great. In practice? Portugal are ripping their tits off. Same as at the last world cup Belgium just bottle it. Although they just scored so I guess I’m going to have to eat my words.
1
I only want Belgium to win because I’m fed up of that fucking mincing, all fall down, ballerina Ronaldo 😷👺
0
Oh everyone hates Portugal. I want Belgium to win too. But Portugal is a fucking sneaky bastard and you can’t underestimate them.
1
If it looks like they’re going out towards the end of the match watch for a barrage dirty tackles, foul theatrics and sulking gestures towards the ref. I doubt they will finish with 11 on the field either!
0
They suffer from the same problem we had in the mid 2000s – an abundance of talent who just cannot function well together.
1
Fucking exciting finish for sure
0
I’m glad I was wrong and happy to eat my words as Portugal are GONE. 😍😍😍
1
…….and they put mayonnaise on their chips! Fucking animals.
1
That was a NASTY foul.
0
Nothing is as bad as THAT Kung Fu kick in the 2010 World Cup final.
0
Oh when De Jong decided to go all Street Fighter 2? Yeah that was nasty.
0
Schumacher on Battiston in the 82 World Cup semi final tops the lot.
5
I dunno zidane’s blatant fuck you headbutt in 98 ranks up there.
2
Actually Zidane head butted Marco Materazzi, in the World Cup 2006. Fucking magic. The greasy sp¡khouse deserved it.
Wasn’t even a proper head but. But one of my favourites of all time.
2
In light of the football chants post. #fuck off Spain fuck off spain fuck off spain#
0
Who the fuck is this common female football tactical genius commentating for fuck’s sake 😷 like she knows anything about top flight football 🧐 Sounds like she’s reading it from an autocue, stupid thick clacker 👺
0
The best bit is the silence before the actual commentator continues and ignores her.
1
Hahahaha 😂
0
Seriously once you notice it you can’t unhear it. Every time she tries to chip in there’s a gap and he just continues ignoring her.
1
She has no actual fucking foresight. She’s just commentating 5 minutes behind 😷 “Pedro” 🤫
0
Holy shit. As the Siri bot continues to drone on. Come on Croatia.
2
Spot on 👍 I was going to say she sounds like a bot an all, LB 🤖
0
Spain are and have always been dirty cheating fall over diving cunts 😷
Go ooon Croatia 🇭🇷 💪
0
Yeah I noticed the sudden amount of dives after they went a goal down.
0
Didn’t want Spain to score, but what were the defenders thinking?
0
Probably listening to that awful fucking woman, that’s what they were thinking 🤨
1
If she doesn’t shut up I might throw my remote through the tv. She is nails on a chalkboard levels of annoying.
1
Ah bollocks that ruined my tea.
0
Ah double bollocks.
0
That’s that then 😢 Greezy cheating diving cunts are in the last 8 🙄
0
Least France could lose later…
0
😀 is there still a chance 😀😀
0
Fucking hope so, come on Croatia!
0
5 minutes ET I demand 🧐
0
Should read injury time
0
Get the fucking fuck in!!!
0
Never doubted it 🤥😬
0
She just got a name wrong too and embarrassingly quickly changed it for the right one 🙄 Fuck off back to Essex, Eliza 🤫
0
Last ditched attempt at a greezy dive because he fluffed his shot, the ref should of given the cunt a yellow card 👎
0
That was clearly coming for a while, sadly. Croatia you can do it, come on.
0
X2 💪💪
0
Fucking hell, went for a pee and now 3-5 to the greezies 😢
0
How the fuck did Croatia get so far in the competition?
For a team with so many “itches” in it, they’re just not up to scratch.
3
Last five minutes of the game they decide to start playing 😂
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Frogs one down 😂😂😂
What the fuck is the long steak of piss wearing, not content with a blond stripe he has got one long sleeve, what a twat.
1
3–3 😀
I thought it was overrrr…..it ain’t now 😀😀😀
Extra time you snail eating cunts 😷😷🧐
0
I wasn’t paying attention that much (other things to do) but fuck France go Switzerland you should have plenty of energy as you did fuck all in WW2.
2
Who the fuck subs on giroud in place of benzema?
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It’s the Swiss v Africa, LB! Let’s be honest. It isn’t France, it’s a fucking joke,
1
Mbappe is decent, the rest are shit. Giroud especially.
0
That was not a yellow card.
0
Yes! Yes! Yes! Fuck off fuck off fucking fuck off! Amazing outcome
2
Sorry I’m going to continue to say fucking yes for the next hour. Get fucked France.
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Mbappe, you are a cunt, goodbye 😂
3
Fuck off Frenchies and don’t come back. Fuck you garlic eating cunts. Fuck You Macron you granny shagging, Merkel licking wanker.
5
I don’t believe it-all the top teams underperforming and being knocked out.
Wokegate-if he beats Ze Germans, has an easier route to the final.
Lucky cunt.
I watched both matches tonight-the first I have watched this tournament-I wasn’t dissapointed👍
5
Late to the party but au revoir you fucking cheese eating surrender monkeys. Thanks Switzerland.
2
Is that a tear stained croissant I see?
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
1
Set my alarm for 1:55am and off to bed. See you in a few hours.
Come on Eng-Ger-Land…
https://mikesplace2017.wordpress.com/2021/06/13/video-of-the-day-31/
2
That fucking ‘Emma’ on the ITV commentary team does my nut in.
She’s supposed to be a co commentator (used to be known as a summariser). That job is one where the commentator brings you in for an opinion now and again.
Her? She just prattles on non stop. I recorded the Spain game, I was busy and planned on watching it later. I had to forward it to the end. I couldn’t take her non stop wittering on. The commentator wasn’t asking her for input, but who cares? It’s ‘The Emma Show ‘ My missus was laughing at how long she could go without talking whenever the commentator paused for breath. It seems 6 seconds is her limit.
She talks more than the main commentator. And talks complete bollocks of course.
Shut her the fuck up! Made the game unwatchable. It looked a good game too. Excruciating stuff, Brian.
3
Awful fucking thing that never stops talking! During yesterday’s game she gave me ear cancer!!!!
3
She reminds me of that automated voicemail you sometimes get. Robotic, no emotion and you auto delete it. No I wasn’t in a car accident in Coventry, no I already have insurance. Piss off.
4
I was browsing a footy forum and they were complaining like fuck about her wittering on. It’s like she’s terrified of dead air…for a single second.
A lot of split arses are like this. Which is why they belong in the kitchen or talking about cute fluffy kittens and embroidery. They don’t belong alongside a football commentator.
Some funny comments I read were ‘Stuart Pearce in a frock’ and ‘She said listen to the crowd. I fucking would if she’d shut up for two seconds.’
Commentator needs to tell her (or their boss) not to keep gabbing on. They’re probably scared of being called ‘sexist’. She’s a gobby social media complainer after all.
And they were calling out the media/Twitter crowing over her. She just gets a few facts off the internet, writes them down and brings them to the game. ‘Moratta has 1.2 expected assists per game.’ Any old cunt could do that. Ask her outside the ground and see if she knows ‘her own stats’. Not a fucking chance. ‘Croatia have won 61.6% of their games over the last 5 years.” Yeah right love.
Knowledgeable? Arse.
Expected fucking assists?
I mean, who gives a fuck about bollocks like that?
Fuck off.
England 1 Germany 1 prediction.
5-4 to the Jurgens on penalties as usual.
2
With any luck she’ll be in a car accident and lose her vocal cords!
1
Well gentleman, who’s your money on? The Churchill’s or the Hitler’s?
0
We’ve benched mount, grealish and fucking foden. Does wokegate want to win?
2
Who knows what goes through the mind of crazed Wokegate!
Also will the Hitler’s take the knee? You can guarantee our bunch of cunts will!
0
And trippier is starting? Fuck off
0
Grealish should play. He’s got a touch of the ‘Gazza’ about his play.
He must make sure half the team are dark keys though. And gays. Probably gays too. They’ve got half a mong up front after all (Kane).
3
All 3 should be on have you seen the absolute shower of shit we’re putting up midfield?
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Too white and not inflicted with the gayness enough for Wokegate.
1
Fuck the rest let Klinsmann speak he knows a lot more than you. Despite being a diving cunt.
1
Trippier deserves to be in there as he’s had an outstanding season for Athletico Madrid. The problem is that we’re playing 2 CDMs in front of a back 3 with little link between midfield and attack. Rice and Phillips are both good players but don’t have that additional X factor that’s needed to unlock top teams.
3
Germans didn’t take the knee.
Come on the Adolfs then!
England will probably win the tournament now we’ve got a bunch of unlikeable knee taking chippy millionaires.
2
We’re getting pummelled in midfield.
0
I say go further and have players come out to the field barefoot and in ankle-chains. You’ve got to out-woke the Woke cunts to show them how ridiculous they are. Tell them you want to see Christ the Redeemer in Rio pulled down as this “Jesus person” was clearly a psychotic honky who infiltrated the Jews and invented White Supremacy.
2
My brother says the Krauts did take the knee. 🤔
2
Yes, he is right. I got that wrong I was half looking and I think their knee was a quick one. But yes, they did take the knee, I’ve seen a photo now.
1
If England shit the bed today, then they really ought to just disband the national team until super-cyborg players are invented in 2035.
1
I hope the Krauts thoroughly savage the knee taking Chiggen Floyd George groupies today. The cunts aren’t even proud to be English, so why the fuck would I want a shower of woke softarsed shit like them win?
I do not – repeat – do not want to see cunts like Me Me Sterling, Marcus Eldridge Cleaver Rashcunt and Gareth Twatgate win anything ever.
Going out on penalties, with Me Me, Rashcunt and that Lingard bellend all missing will do me.
5
Sorry Norman but I can’t root against England. Especially against the fucking Krauts.
0
I’m not sure if Germany a really shit or England are playing well 🤔
2
Considering we just nearly let in two goals I think it’s a bit of both.
2
Well, that’s it, well deserved win. England went to sleep in the second half. Good goals by England. Still a dodgy side, though.
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Meant to say that Germany went to sleep, they never used to be as slack as this, it’s shocking. Lothar Mattheus will be smashing his TV right now.
1
I literally fell asleep and got woken up by the second goal.
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Oh, no. Fuck me, Southgate is going to turn out as a hero!
Fuck me. Life’s just not fair!
😁
3
Germany were awful, “woeful” as Alan Hanson used to say. It’s a scandal how they play these days. The 1990 Krauts would have DESTROYED this shower of dorks.
2
Get the fucking fuck IN.
2
When was the last time we beat Germany in a tournament? 1966?
2
People seem to forget Euro 2000 when England beat Germany 1-0 in Belgium, goal by Shearer, However both England and Germany were knocked out in the group stage by Portugal and Romania. Yeah, no wonder that is a forgotten tournament. France won it, 103 minute Golden Goal by David Trezeguet against Italy.
1
I think I don’t remember Euro 2000 as I spent the summer balls deep into a goth girl off my tits on booze and drugs personally.
1
I barely remember that year actually.
0
Happy days, Biscuits, happy days!
I “retired” from football watching after the 1998 World Cup (I’m from Scotland) and didn’t really return until the 2010 World Cup. The tournaments are fun these days because at least two teams melt down and shit the bed the pieces and underdogs like Senegal, Ghana, Costa Rica, Iceland are great to cheer on against the megabucks douchebags of the “Big Teams”. Hope Denmark win the cup again, they deserve it.
2
Yeah I agree a Denmark victory like 92 would be good. Still remember Cameroon in ‘90 beating Argentina. Good old Rog.
2
My dad never shut up about that World Cuo game in 1970. He insisted for years that England fucked up because (the admittedly great) Bobby Charlton was taken off when we were winning.
However, I always told him that the absence of the great Gordon Banks in goal was why Beckenbauer, Seeler, and ‘Der Bomber’ saw us off. Bonetti wasn’t in the same class as Banksy.
3
That Cameroon win was and still is one of the best moments in football. Roger Milla, Eugene Ekeke and François Omam-Biyik were amazing, great team, was gutted when England beat them due to reckless penalties given away.
1
It’s coming home, it’s coming…
0
That was my whole of the 80s, LB, just a blur now for the most part. Booze, (powder, pills, so i’m told 😉 ) and motorbikes, looking back it’s a wonder I am still here today, I know quite a few that aren’t. Always a party to go back to when the pubs kicked out at the weekend and always a bored girl that needed some attention. Didn’t care about politics, no burn loot murder or Gretta Tunderpants. Good times.
Bah, fuck off!
2
I woke up after a night on special k on a random bathroom floor, using my jeans as a pillow and decided. Yeah should probably stop doing this.
Good night out though.
1
As long as your pants were still on at least you know it wasn’t Krav or mince pie guys place 😂
What ever happened to those two kindly bummers that disappeared from here I wonder 🤔
0
Anyone notice that both Captains wore Pride armbands?
Not at all political, obviously…
0
The woke social worker and his band of merry knee benders live to virtue signal another day
2
Damn and double fucking damn!
If these knee taking fairies win the bloody thing, the woke generation will have their own 1966 moment, which they’ll never ever shut up about.
Expect shitloads of ‘Greatest Ever’ and ‘Best Of All Time’ bollocks. I’m not looking forward to Twatgate, Pound Sterling and Rashcunt getting knighthoods for a start…
Only thing is, the likes of Banksy, Mooro, Bobby, Big Jack, Nobby, Bally and the rest (and Sir Alf) were proper football men and true heroes. And they will never be bettered. So up yours, Twatgate.
And the BBC can fuck off and all…
6
This Englandshire team are more than beatable, it’s comcal that they are fourth in the FIFA rankings. Pretty sure Algeria or another machine-team would clown them. It will be interesting to see how this plays out.
4
You are Alex Salmond & I claim my £5 history of great Scottish fort all achievements, voucher👍
1
Swedish national anthem – shit. Swedish female fans – fucking lovely.
1
Ukraine seem to be playing a weird hybrid of Spain 2006 in passing/defending and a bad Russia attack.
0
Whatever works in football, go for it. It beats getting humped. Greece 2004 wasn’t pretty but imagine being Greek and seeing that miracle!
0
Yeah that wasn’t good but they won somehow.
0
Greece had a great Hun manager, Otto Rehhagel, a legend of the Bundesliga who just drilled the shit out of them into not letting in goals and Angelos Charisteas was a great striker. Terry Venables was in the running to manage Greece, glad they picked Rehhagel who managed a Werder Bremen side that played very sexy football, but for Greece he played to the team’s strengths. If a team doesn’t play as a machine then you’re fucked, no matter how many “stars” you have on the pitch.
Just noticed that a documentary on Otto and the Greece team came out this year, here’s the trailer:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWLQUaIPkiY
1
Nice I’ll give it a watch. Always interested in a good footie docu.
0
Bloody phone, I meant documentary.
0
Thanks for the link CG
That Greek team were a nightmare.
0
It seems to only be on Sky/Now TV at present.
A great documentary on The New York Cosmos team of the 1970s which had Pele etc in their team is on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fBR8jN_SyE0
Crazy stuff went on! Very fun watch. Great tunes on the soundtrack.
0
Nice I’ll give it a watch. The Sunderland documentary on Netflix is entertaining for how incredibly conceited a certain player was and the owner shambles.
0
Sunderland ‘Til I Die, is that it? 2 Series? Hmm. I’ll give the first episode a go. I was in Sunderland a few years ago to see Bruce Springsteen and it’s a dreary place, totally unlike Newcastle and some cunt in the crowd was throwing beer over folk, then it was a 6 hour drive back to Aberdeen, MY dreary shithole!
0
That’s the one. I’m sadly a Sunderland fan but no longer live there. It’s a shithole I agree, but the women are easy 😁
0
The Turd That Refused to Flush
A Comprehensive History of the Sweden International Football Team
The new international bestseller
0
England winning this thing would be a disaster. You’d have a whole new wave of middle class pricks becoming “fans” overnight. Prices would go through the roof and you will need a mortgage to buy a season ticket. Every game would be an orgy of BLM, Gay Rights, Trannie Equality, Welcome Refugees and Save the fucking Polar Bear. All football records before this year will be expunged because they are all the result of white supremacy.
Wokegate will get a 30 year contract, a knighthood and eventually become Prime Minister.
I’m watching the fucking darts.
4
It would be a never-ending circle-jerk on steroids. Yeah, after Gazza’s tears of Italia 90 a goldrush of middle class cunts invaded English football and the prices went up, the age of the prawn sandwich corporate box brigade was born. Reminds me of a great Fast Show sketch…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fvjk47UORFs
1
That was fucking great, especially the name…..Roger Nouveau. I know a few wankers like that.
Hi Freddie, no hard feelings about last night, I meant what I said you’re alright, but I fucked up my wording. My mistake and I owned up to it. Also I mocked you which was well out of line. Even for here. – DA
3
Couldn’t agree more, Freddie. Also, if Twatgate’s woke mob win it, everybody will instantly forget the recent treachery involving the European Super League. The fans, the media, the FA, the government will be jumping around like knobheads, acting like the backstabbing done by the clubs involved never happened. All will suddenly be rosy again in the football garden, and there’ll be endless shite about a ‘new era’ and ‘football being the winner’. This, of course, will be complete bollocks and nothing will have changed.
2
It’s a lose lose situation. If England win Wokegate will put it down to the fact that they all took the knee despite racist crowd boos and were in unity with burn loot murder!
If England lose Wokegate will put it down to the fact that England fans put the team off with racist booing and were not behind the team of woke millionaire wankers!
5
God forbid they knight Raheem Sterling, anyway, shouldn’t it be the white person subjugating on the floor and the black one holding the big shiny knife?
0
You haven’t heard the last from those $uper League cunts. They will be going back to the drawing board at some point.
0
I saw they were going to ask the Wembley DJ to play music and try to drown out the booing. That’s right, stick your head in the fucking sand and pretend its not happening. La-la-la-la I can’t hear you!
1
Horror tackle, dirty cunt. Red card and fuck off home, dirty cunt!
0
The DJ should have played the condescending cringe classic, “Ebony and Ivory” by Faul McCartney & Stevie “I’m going to live in Ghana” Wonder.
1
England have beat Germany?
WTF?
Is nothing sacred anymore ?
Must be the Brexit dividend 👍
1
Fucking hell, what a header! Unreal. Had a feeling Ukraine were going to win. I hate how Sweden play. Never nod off in football, you “play-for-penalties” mugs.
0
Was Dovbyk wearing a sports bra when he celebrated or am I not up to date on the latest fashions?
2