What the fuck is this?

Jeremy Ferromagnetic, spends the whole series proving he is ‘NOT GAY’ by diddling moist slags by the thousands. He brilliantly sounds all papal and popey but then for some reason suffers severe alzheimers and and starts sounding like a dopey cafe bint saying ‘do you want a bacon sarnie with that?’*. This ebbing and flowing of papal lah de dah with relapses into East London slack jawing is most intriguing. I’m sure the Pope of the 15th-16th century would have to agree.

Anyhoo while shagging loads of slags and generally putting bints in their place and identifying cross dressers so he can put his papal rod up their trans hole he sends off his son (Bob Geldof) to act all tough and dish out punishment. His other son, who is more effeminate tups his 13 yr old brothers wife while the 13yr old kisses pigeons in the garden. Finally Jezza’s daughter get’s fucked brutally by an Alan Rickmon wannabe who in turn gets rogered by a stableboy. Every guy in this is a weak sort of nancy, and the very first battle between France and Italy (well Rome) was decided by yes you’ve guessed it SURRENDER.

So Bob Geldof gets upset because a bird he fucked had her ears chopped off by ‘some tough frenchman’ so Bob Geldoff sends of his hard man who whispers all the time to sound menacing. He is a one man torture department and loves dishing out purple nurples (that’s about it). It’s really quite sad because the ‘Lord High Marshal’ from Riddick is complete wasted in this as he is poisoned and now suffers from Fat Tongue.

Then Bob Geldoff get’s together a load of tough italians to take down the French, blow up their powder mag and after this the top ‘ard man with the second top ‘ard man celebrate ‘their victory’ with a dung funnel penetration in a graveyard. Meanwhile, Bob Geldoff fucks the sister of the guy who force fucked his sister and sided with the French. Just as it gets interesting, we cut to the graveyard and the inevitable essential climax of the two important hard men finishing up. I am sure this series was done by the BBC, but I can’t be bothered to check.

The high tech weapons in the italian armoury are truly hilarious. ‘As effective as a cat flap in the elephant house’. Seriously a pizza cutter and a mincer would have me more convinced**. Anyhoo what next a period drama of the faggot community in the teutonic era? I really want to understand how they collect so many sticks.

*(always finishing with a Lock Jaw from He-man Pose trying to find a picture)
**oh wait I get it now THEY were the mincer

Nominated by: Get Fucked Woke Cunts