THE IN-BETWEENERS:
A bus wankers cunting for Channel 4, as they seem to be mulling over a reunion of the Unbetweeners. Far, far too late in the day.
Everyone has a guilty pleasure and mine is for the very un-PC comedy show which ran from 2008-2010, dealing with four sixth forms lads, Neil, Simon, Jay and Will , and their comments and jokes were disgusting. Just go on You Tube and see things like “Will’s mum” or “Inbetweeners watch Two Girls One Cup” and you will see what I mean.
At the time of recording the lads were meant to be between 16 and 18, though the actors playing them were in their twenties. Today two of them are 40 (Simon Bird and Joe Thomas), 39 (Blake Harrison) and the baby of the group (Jay) is 37.
Even if you could find some excuse to bring them together, times are so different, and the yoof of the country so puritanical you would never get away with lines like “My dad ain’t bent” or “knee deep in clunge” or “she’s on the blob” or “If she wasn’t your mum, would you fuck her?”. I can’t see where Mr. Pea Dough Kenendy would fit in now, or the elderly ice cream lady. Neil’s fingering in the car and “she wanked me off a few times” would certainly not get past the script editor.
You can just picture the audience and the production team clutching their pearls, and sniffing their smelling salts, while they get RSI posting their distaste on X for “likes”
Only one of the cast (Joe Thomas) doesn’t look dissipated – two of them look frankly raddled, one frankly looks like a tramp (“I think you are meant to call them homeless these days” as Simon had it).
I am a dirty old man of many years standing, and I sometimes watch the old shows on DVD if I am feeling really down just for a good laugh, but as Thomas Mann wrote “you can’t go home again”. Far better to leave them as four teenagers with foul mouths than bring them back as middle aged politically correct bores.
Why are the company even thinking of doing it?. It will never work.
Nominated by: W. C. Boggs
Where TV comedy is concerned I always think “leave them wanting more” is the best policy. I love seeing Simon behave like custard (getting upset over a trifle), Jay with his boasts, Neil still being that lovable but dim lad (but the only one of the four who ever had a job – Thorpe Park and Asda). I wonder if he ever fulfilled his wish to become “an airplane driver”?, and Will being Will (I often wondered how the other three put up with them)
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Wills mum was one hotty
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Cracking tits
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And arse
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For me, this is the funniest scene.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wsnljbEMHQ
Then Jay says in the toilets when they are hiding from the ‘hard’ kids, Jay says to Simon ‘what was you going to do….cum in their eyes?’
Fucking funny.
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Gone, done, finished for fucks sake let it fade away. There is more programmes coming back than wanked out rock bands. What an amazing original idea. Bollocks
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Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Starwars Starwars, Star Trek Star Trek….. and if what I recently heard is correct…. The Goonies The Goonies.
I wish Hollywood would leave my childhood alone.
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I just hope Stars On Sunday or Juke Box Jury never come back. Imagine Lily Allen in crotchless knickers singing Ave Maria.
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Light years ago, when I was a young teenager, one of my mates was the spit of Jay.
He was a little cunt.
There was none of the porkie telling, like Jay, but he was very spontaneous and no matter what shit he caused, someone else would pay the price for it.
Example…. gang of us walking down the street, next minute there’s an almighty crash and he’s off like a Mad March Hare. He’d thrown a half knacker through someones front window and by the time the rest of us had reacted, there was some big evil cunt breathing down our necks. Thankfully we escaped.
When we caught up with him he was laughing like fuck.
But worse was to come. Another lad in our merry band started pulling similar stunts.
His favourite being hurling insults at dangerous looking gentlemen on the other side of the road, some of whom turned out to be quite capable long distance runners.
We seemed to spend half our fucking lives running away from some cunt or other, who wanted to cause us extreme harm.
It got to the point where as we were walking along, one of the group would just start running. Without turning round or trying to work out what had happened, everybody just ran, instinctively. We could go quite a distance initially, before someone gasped ‘ what the fuck are we running for ? ‘
Obviously, that trick can only be pulled so many times.
A variation of this disgraceful teenage behaviour was the ‘ drive by shooting craze ‘ which developed.
We all had pushbikes, mine was a splendid home made orange and black affair with apehanger bars. We’d ride around shooting dried peas ( pigeon peas we called them) at people with Sekiden guns. Catch someone in the face or on the lug ‘ole and they stung like fuck.
https://www.glennsantiqueshop.co.uk/product-page/1960s-sekiden-automatic-sap-50-pellet-toy-gun
We thought it was fucking hilarious, but we ended it after a short while as we were getting recognised quite easily, leading to some close calls.
The Jay lookalike ended up nicking an ambulance, for which he, and no one else, took the rap.
The cunt.
Hehehehe
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Reading the blurb in the link, I had to laugh.
These things were never used sensibly.
What would be the fucking point ?
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I grew up over the road from a park.
My mam and dad are still there.
So in the days before computers all kids played on the park.
Idyllic really.
There was a kid younger than me he’d of been about 6yrs,
Id of been about 8/9yrs,
He had a old man’s face and was pretty much feral.
I went on the park and one of the neighbours kids on there with this little kid messing in a grid.
MNC ” what you doing?”
Kid ” looking for bugs”
MNC “why like?”
Kid ” he’s gonna eat em for a sweet”
MNC ” are ya?”
Feral kid ” yeah”
They found a black beetle and this kid ate it .
His reward? Aniseed ball.
We quickly russelled up some woodlice which to our amusement he scoffed for a mojo.
He’d eat anything!
Spiders, daddy longlegs, snails anything for a sweetie.
He must of really liked sweets?
Wed be crying with laughter, tears rolling down our cheeks while he ate worms and stuff.
I often wonder what happened to him,
Maybe he still eats bugs?
Does he feel like we underpaid him?
If I met him again I’d still offer him a fruit salad to eat a worm.
Some entertainment never ages.
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Back in the 90’s I was in a similar group of friends. Nowadays though one of them is a mechanic, one of them is an artist, one of them is me (former British Army scaly-back) and the other is a crack head – he was the biggest cunt of the lot of us back then and yet his brother has a doctorate and I think works for the UN so I don’t think he can pull the Arnold Rimmer card and blame his parents.
There was also a lad I hung around with for a while who was a nightmare. His Grandad owned a local boxing club so I didn’t want to say no when he “invited” me to go shoplifting with him. Thankfully he was finally expelled from the school at the age of 12 for throwing a chair at a much-disliked science teacher (she moved out of the way thankfully).
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Mr. Gilbert was my favourite character.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rGWLoev_D_c
LOL
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Greg Davies is a legend… and a fellow Shropshire lad. Would love to meet that bloke.
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So you’re a Salopian TITS? My wife’s maternal grandfather was from Norton in Hales near Market Drayton. He was a blacksmith and moved to Birmingham very early in the twentieth century for better pay. He worked for HP sauce in Aston as did his son and grandson, my wife’s late cousin. Amongst the three of them we worked out they did 147 years for the company. Now long gone, HP sauce is made abroad and imported.
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@arfurbrain
It’s nice to hear the term “Salopian” used in the correct way (a person from Shropshire). Many people from Shrewsbury seem to use it as a synonym for “a person from Shrewsbury”.
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Never to be seen again on tv, funny as fuck still to this day, the legendary Brass Eye. Also, Jamm, the tv version of Blue Jam from Radio 1 in the 90’s. Not even avaiable to stream on all 4 anymore. I hate to mention the BBC, but Monkey Dust also. You will find clips on Youtube. The last of good British comedy.
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I love Monkey Dust. Probably one of the most underrated dark comedies of the early 2000’s that will be assigned to the monkeydustbin of history because hardly anybody saw it.
It was on at something like 11pm…. on a Friday night…. on Channel 4…. when everybody who would have watched it was out in the pub trying to get drunk and maybe laid.
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“By the powers invested in me, by some bloke down the pub.”
Fucking gold.
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It was BBC 3, and it has a cult following online.
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It was always self-congratulatory tosswank.
Plus it didn’t have a black disabled lesbian in a wheelchair in it.
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That’s because all of those minge-licking, afro-having actors are trying to get cast for the even newer, upcoming biopic of Stephen Hawking’s life.
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Amazing, how that twat Coogan keeps revisiting and milking the now tiresome Alan Partridge character and ‘franchise’.
Yet, his greatest ever creation, Tommy Saxondale, has not been seen for years.
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