Rylan Clark-Neal

Posted on by

Rylan Clark (not forgetting the Neal) is described in Wiki as an English presenter, television personality, singer and model.

Rylan’s “talents” seemingly have no limits, he has been a part time model (not sure for what exactly), and has been in several Take That and Westlife tribute bands in Spain, and in a Spanish boy band called 4bidden.

Best known for finishing FIFTH on The X Factor. Has presented or been in such scintillating TV delights as Celebrity Big Brother, Big Brothers Bit on the Side, This Morning, The Xtra Factor, Up Late with Rylan and Babushka. He played the part of an air steward in Absolutely Fabulous: The Movie and has also been on BBC Celebrity Masterchef.

He met his spouse (Dan-Neal) on Big Brother in 2015, Rylan being the Alpha male in the relationship. A real man’s man.

He has appeared with such talented individuals such as Lorraine Kelly, Katie Price, John Bishop (perhaps a bit unfair to John), and a truly unforgettable and magical moment with Nicole Scherzinger (Lewis “no VAT” Hamilton’s former leg over).

Link (courtesy of Basement Bob) of said moment provided here, in order for you to judge Rylan in his magnificent splendour for yourself (Ryan being the more nauseating one of the two): https://youtu.be/WGGTX5JQufU

Whilst I can say hand on heart that I have NEVER EVER watched any of the programmes that he has been on (and I do consider myself to be quick off the mark with the TV remote) it has been impossible to avoid the effeminate gormless pathetic looking toothy cunt totally.

It depresses me deeply that despite appearing devoid of any obvious talent this “Wannabe” has actually made it onto our screens, and is now considered a celebrity on the type of programme that is now passes for “entertainment”.

Every time I look at his face I just want to slap it as hard as I can, so I can do as much damage as I can to his teeth, on which he spent £25,000. This is even before he says anything, which is ALWAYS pointless, banal, crude, unintelligent and truly insufferable.

On a rival website (not nearly as classy as this one), someone described Rylan as “An annoying camp gay idiot with Hollywood horse teeth”, or even with “teeth that could chew a tomato through a letter box”.

On the evidence presented I would very much like to nominate Rylan Clark for a severe Cunting as I feel he is most deserving and worthy recipient.

Nominated by Willie Stroker

61 thoughts on “Rylan Clark-Neal”

  1. I have written it before on these hallowed pages, but given this is a specific cunting for the chutney ferret, I should write it again.

    This cunt looks like he has borrowed his plastic, comedy teeth from Dick Emery’s vicar character.

    Bet his other half gets a bit nervous at blow job time, when Rylan’s choppers are circumnavigating his bobby’s helmet.

      • To pinch a truly epic term from a fellow cunter…

        “multitalentless”

        I can happily say I have never encountered this spunkbubble before in any shape, size, or form, but he indeed has a highly marketable face.

        If you manufacture industrial-strength punchbags, that is.

  3. I actually got to see this moron on Lorraine the other day ( No I don’t watch Lorraine.The wife does ! ) It struck me that yet again a poofy effeminate mincer with no fucking brains gets to speak with such authority on all fucking matters, including matters of State, is a sad reflection on a fucking society that seems to have a preference for vacuous arse holes with queer teeth.

    BTW, do those fucking teeth need a licence ?

    This wadever the fuck he is, is a complete and utter cunt.

  4. I count myself fortunate never to have heard or seen anything of this cunt, except the photo above. Guess I’m just lucky or, possibly, more discerning in the programmes I watch. I’m also fortunate that Mrs Frenulum doesn’t like any of that reality tv pish, nor Strictly Cum Dancing nor soaps. And she let me buy an Aprilia Tuono to play with. What a fucking life I have.

    • Sounds like a keeper, I’m after an Aprilia RS (2 stroke) though won’t have her blessing. Tough titty!

  5. Television is infested with queers. I don’t understand why programme makers assume that we all want to see a load of faggots spouting their camp shite every time we put the telly on.
    Queers should be kept to one dedicated channel,that way normal people wouldn’t have to run the risk of some Nancy boy screeching away on every fucking programme. The reason,I believe,that there are so many of them on the telly is down to the fact that queers are promiscuous. They enjoy nothing better than one of their Chemsex parties where they can exchange drugs at the same time as exchanging poofery diseases. These parties act as a network for queers akin to the Masons although the Masons aren’t as disease-ridden. The leading jobbie-jabbers prey on the younger and more vulnerable queers and exchange television jobs for perverted sex.

    Of course,it’s not just the Arts where queers use their own network to advance their careers. It can be seen in teaching,religion,social-care etc…anywhere that young innocents are,you will also find the queers. It’s nothing but nepotism for deviants.Nobody would have heard of this fairy, Rylan Clark, if he wasn’t one of them.

    Bring back Gross Indecency as a crime punishable by birching. That would reduce the amount of deviants parading around as if they were normal people.They are the very definition of abnormal and ,as such, should be prosecuted and persecuted until they hanged their minds about being “Gay” and admit they only do it because they enjoy the attention.
    I won’f finish on “Fuck them” in this case. I wouldn’t want to give them any encouragement.

    • I’m glad your posted that DF as it’s saved me the time…..
      excellent stuff….
      Rylan Clarke’s like one of those annoying cunts you see at butlins , he does lots of different things badly!
      Shit singer
      Shit presenter etc etc
      Or as they would say on Star Trek “ it’s talent Jim but not as we know it”……….

    • Careful there, Mr Fiddler…or you *might* be accused of protesting too much by the pro-homo forces of darkness…

      • I’m a martyr for my views. If it’s not the queers,it’ the Coons,or the Pikeys,or the crippled,or the benefit-claimants,or the moslems,or the religious nutters, or the pakis etc. I don’t know I manage to keep up with my list of deplorables,I really don’t……Nearly forgot that drunk.workshy bunch,the Scotch. I don’t approve of them,either.

      • All religion / religious practices / religious tales should take place at home within four walls or the chosen house of worship. Not in public and certainly not in schools.

        That would be the problem solved.

        Other than policing the peaceful religion worshipers dens for terror plotting that is.

    • Fuckin ‘jobbie jabber’

      He he, years since I’ve heard that and probably the first time I’ve read it.

      That’s the Scotch in ye, Dick Fiddler.

  6. Are you a screaching queen?
    Are you as camp as a row of tents?
    Are you hugely irritating?
    Are you overly opinionated?
    Do you shout a lot?
    Do you take it in the chuffer?
    Do you laugh at absolutely anything?
    Please apply to LGBT TV ……

  7. Is his name Ryan and its just they fuckin teeth that make him pronounce it wrong?

    I always thought it weird that Freddie Mercury had a great singing voice but couldn’t talk for shite coz of they fuckers.

    • I remember when Billie Piper had her teeth done (and she needed it!), and when she appeared again on Doctor Who she sounded well weird… Stuff like ‘We have to get in Ver Tardish to eshcape Ver Daleksh!’ She sounded pissed… Mind you, I’d have to down a bottle of Scotch before doing that shite…

  8. Celebrity.
    Fucking non-bastard entity. Mental Candy floss for this era.

    I would say generation but there’s plenty of people who should know fucking better who are my age( scraping the underside of 50)

    No wonder we can be easily controlled by the media who are in truth the controllers of government, no party, just the those in charge.

    Fuck the media for force feeding us this retarded shit and fuck those who can’t see through it.

    • The media just bully the government into doing what they want done.

      An example is the minute the media criticise someone for not visiting a burnt out building full of illegals, they are there like a shot handing out cash “just to shut the media up”.

      Don’t think for one minute they really wanted to give them a fucking penny as that’s the job of an insurance policy.

      You have to declare your name etc for insurance though, which would have flagged them who went to ground for thr deportation process.

      New illegals policy;
      Run, hide, wait till you get burnt out…..then come out and tell!

  9. I caught sight of this cunt once and assumed he was off one of those shite reality programmes. Now, thanks to Mr Stroker’s Wikipedia entry above I know more than I ever wished to. He was a strange orange colour with fluorescent teeth. Presumably totally talent-free. He will go far.

  10. How has this fuckin’ nancy boy amassed so much cash..?

    His arsehole must resemble a squashed blood orange….

    Cunt makes my skin crawl…

    • I hope his buggery antics lead to his arse bleeding like a halal cow until he draws his last breath.

  11. What is Kenny Dalglish doing all over the media at the moment?….
    I almost long for the days when him and Fergie were running the Premiership, before all these ‘tactical’ Johnny Foreigner ‘head coaches’ were about…

    Kenny was always a miserable cunt, but a top, top player…. One of the very best…

      • It always appeared that One day dalglish would prove it’s possible to moan yourself to death…..
        But?
        Years ago I met a couple on the plane over to America that we’re apparently friends of his, after a few drinks I could hold back no longer “ he always appears so miserable and dour?” According to them away from the pressure of football he was really funny and good company? Hard to believe I know but that’s what they said……

  12. That Rylan Clark Cunt all over the telly… It’s like that shite in Corrie… That mincing cunt, Sean, who just goes around going ‘Ooooh!’ all the time… Then there’s that Todd Grimshaw cunt (although his days are numbered because of get rich quick Weinsteinmania), and the fly on top of the dog turd: a bottybashing vicar who has had more men than Napoleon’s army… A vicar and all… Ena Sharples would be turning in her grave, by fuckin’ eck!

    • She would have kicked the mincers doors down and stubbed out her half smoked Woodbine on their Jap’s eye.

      Or was it Capstan or those Players No6 or whatever’s without the filters.

  13. Morrissey’s cunt credentials are second to none… But he was on superb form when calling out the ‘victims’ of Spacey and Weinstein… What was that little mong-a-like actor nobody knows doing in Spacey’s bedroom as a 14 year old anyway? And all those Hollywood celebrislags? They weren’t too upset when Weinstein blew their smelly snatches and careers up the Tinsletown ladder at the time, were they? That’s what they all did it for…. Hate to agree with the man, but that was top stuff, Mozzer….

  14. This talentless cunt is the last frontier for modern dentistry. I can think of no better reason for listening to the radio. To think he gets paid for his inane mincing waffle is an affront to anyone with a proper job.

    • I’d love to see someone smash them right in with a 3lb club hammer. In fact I would pay to see it, some real entertainment and a good reason for him to burst into tears.

  16. Completely off topic…..
    what’s happened to little Timmy (second referendum we didn’t vote on a final destination) farron? One of the UK,s finest quislings has all but disappeared…….

    • I think he has finally succumbed to the pull of his own arses vortex and disappeared up it, onion headed little turd.

      • Was away SB!! TBH I’m sick and fuckin tired of question time , Andrew Marr and Sunday politics!! Etc ……. I’ve hit overload on them!! In the run up to the referendum I watched every debate on TV, listened to every radio show! , I still occasionally watch but my mojos gone….. Not for leaving but for listening to the same crap over and over again !!

      • That shredded wheat topped cunt on the show after QT is dire. A funny cunt he is not, how anyone other than a prize cunt would partake in this ABBC shitfest, I will never know.

      • Yeah, me too Q – libtard dominated groundhog day programmes with occasional token ‘free-thinker’ to give veneer/illusion of balance, wall to wall peacefuls in every Q-time audience, same old same old same old, cynical doesn’t even begin to describe it.

        So hard not to be overcome with apathy, no longer feel much engaged, woolly snowflake dross, eyes glaze over…every day feeling more like the idiot bastard son of Syd Barrett & Charles Manson – don’t think the neighbors have twigged anything yet though…

      • Exactly SB…..
        The majority of it is just loaded wonky eyed remaniac nonsense, I’m absolutely sick to death of it ……

      • Don’t recall a single word Timmy uttered! Or any of the issues ‘debated’… Oh yes, one on gender confusion in kids or some such nonsense…

  17. that Duncan Goodhew has gone a bit quiet. bit surprising really , it’s only 30 years since he won his Olympic medal.

  18. He is an orange painted fuck knuckle that I would gladly turn into pate with a baseball bat what an utter shirt lifting shit stain of a cunt this retard is….even worse that Lilly the musical mong…….fuck it get the batt

  19. A Queenie bungle cunt of the 1st order. Gives poofs like ne a bad name.Talentless vapid naff camp twat.

    • Don’t get me wrong Kravdarth- this posting was primarily about the way he looks, talks, what he says and lack of talent. Not about sexual preference.

  20. Who the actual fuck is paying him and where does this money originate from?

    Cunt will be on the tax evasion gravy train if he is coining in that much. Utter oxygen thief and despicable cunt. Great Nom!

  21. I can’t understand how any homo would want to burgle his shite safe?

    I mean imagine what you would have to listen to from him in that process, the noises the cunt would come away with while waving the arms out in the air “Ohhh my god” .

  22. I think the name “Rylan” has the forensic signature of cunt written in its DNA. Nuf said…

    • There surely was a time when ye was like any other kid though?

      What happened / changed?

      I’m betting the blame lies with the parent(s), whether there was one or two, two batting for the same side, broken home with no father figure or one with a pair of chooks between his legs.

      Regardless, this product is a result of child abuse and bet this did not happen since (s)he became an adult by law.

  23. That cunt is one of the biggest parasites in television he has absolutely no talent whatsoever, and for him to be on celebrity big brother was ludicrous because he wasn’t a celebrity, unless you count finishing fifth on the X factor as being one. I also do my upmost to avoid anything he’s on, can’t bare that horse teethed cunt,

Comments are closed.