Brooklyn Beckham

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At the grand age of 17,the “hugely talented” photographer, Brooklyn Beckham, has announced the release of his first book,allowing us mere mortals to “see the world through Brooklyns eyes”.

For fucks sake,we’ve had to endure 20odd years of his publicity craving parents,particularly that talentless,tone-deaf singer/designer!!!, pig-faced leech Victoria,and now her fucking spoiled brats are getting ready to delight us for the next 20 years.

I’ve done some cuntish things in my life but nothing to deserve a world inhabited by the spawn of the Beckhams/Olivers/Ramseys. They should all be drowned in the septic tank round the back of my local Indian restaurant.

Nominated by: Dick Fiddler

55 thoughts on “Brooklyn Beckham”

  1. I’m sure he’ll do a math’s degree at some point. He’s off the right stock to be another Newton or Hawking.

    I mean he won’t just piss his life away doing vacuous irrelevant shite that no one would give two shits from a tramp’s arsehole about but for the fact that Mummy & Daddy are quite well known.

    Surely not…

  2. An amazing future awaits this talented young man as you so rightly stated RWaC. I am certain that his images justly show all the talent and inspiration that millions of pounds can buy. Of course he will rise like an ascending star into the higher plane of true genius his meteoric rise no doubt eased by huge sums of money but this will have no impact on his amazing artistic ability. It is written (in the pr agency’s contract) that this young man venturing forth with nothing but x million pounds and his trusty camera will displace Ansel Adams and Henri Cartier Bresson as the greatest master of “writing with light” in the known universe. I bow before this fountain of photographic wonder and will consign my pathetic efforts to the bin and donate my camera’s to charity. There is only room for one (cos all that dosh and arselickers take up much room) and that is not me because I am not rich..

  3. Y’know,even if he wasn’t a Beckham,he’s got the kind of look that just makes you want to punch him right in the face. Bet the cunt’s as soft as shite.

  4. They are all cunts… The spoilt brat spawn of the United Judas and Dog Spice… Crooklyn is an everything on a plate cunt (photographer?! Please pick me up off the fucking floor!), but so is ‘model’ Romeo (one of the ugliest kids of all time!) and that little fucker Cruz is a cunt too (he sings better than his horrendous mother though… Then again, so does a ferret in a mangle)…

    • When I accidentally ran over a wee wabbit several years ago the screams from the poor wee thing was 10x better than that harriden’s vocal utterances.

      It really upset me when I put it out of its misery but on reflection had I imagined it was overrated spice I doubt I would have been affected in the slightest as I wrung its neck.

  5. Hey Brooklyn, why have you got a girly sounding shite name ?
    Oh , yeah, its the place your dad spunked in yer mam.
    My mates called Blackpool for the same reason.

    I’m sure there will be some black and white photos of run down areas with some down on their luck local kids sitting on a dirty kerb or doorstep.
    There’s something wrong when black and white poverty porn pics become art………..

    • Naming kids after where they were conceived?

      Lucky for posh spices’ kids that she managed to coin it in otherwise her kids could have been named ‘up against the bins at the back of pound shop’, ‘ bent over the bench in the launderette’ and ‘gang raped in the crack house’.

      • Good for you Rebel!

        My Mrs was into the naming after the place of conception too. My two step sons, the eldest ‘Clacket Lane services’ and his younger brother ‘Broadmoor’ not only are named after where they were conceived but in a weird twist of fate Broadmoor works at Clacket Lane services and Clacket is, well, errr, in Broadmoor.

        They are both gingers so it all maybe due to the merciless thrashings I gave them as kids.

    • I take pictures ( B&W) of run down areas but I never take pictures of homeless people, “poor people” in fact I hate the poverty porn that so many photographers turn out, problem is the wankers that be lap that sort of shit up and want more “gritty realism” I prefer the monicker
      dis-respectful cuntish cliche.
      Bollocks, that’s my shot at a London exhibition out the fucking window.

  6. That fucking bunch of me – me’s need my fine tuned decunting instrument , the white hot fencepost up the chuff. Who the fuck is not fed up with this moronic bunch of photo seeking retards?
    The tabloids know that they would all submit to a family donkey fuck in Trafalgar square just to get on the front page of Angling Times.
    They have less talent that the Karfartians and that is saying something. Wankers!

  7. When Cruz Beckham was born, the Spanish media were pissing themselves at his name.
    The parents said that they named him Cruz as that’s the Spanish version of Cruise, as in Tom Cruise.
    But what the Beckham’s couldn’t get was that Cruz means cross, as in cross the road.

    The first thing i did when i moved here was learn the language, but that cunt Beckham came here, took millions from Real Madrid and couldn’t even do an interview.
    He tried once. He said a few Spanish words with a few ehs and umms, and then spoke English.
    Michael Owen picked it up………

    • Becks really is a superthick cunt…. What sort of cunt (along with his eternally revolting wife) names his kids after a Beastie Boys song, the black bloke from Showaddywaddy, jaywalking, and a toilet cleaner?!… What a fick cockarnee fackin cant, gav’nor…

    • Michael Owen is a greedy little cunt. Spent most of his time at Newcastle” injured”,staging a miraculous recovery whenever an England game came along.
      I’d have charged the little cunt with obtaining money under false pretences.

  8. This shite really is the lowest form of hype over nothing. It’s dad was an extremely successful footballer and could deliver a wicked cross or free kick like no one’s business. So fairs dos. It’s mother got lucky with timing, image and a gullible public and enjoyed a short but successful pop career. So fair dos there I suppose. But what’s this know nothing, done nothing privileged cunt done? Nothing except being the offspring of two famous people. It’s the world we live in now where that alone grants you celebrity status, media attention, money and fame. That said, lots of famous couples have had children and we (the great unwashed peasant class) know little to nothing about them, so I suppose this cunt is allegedly news worthy solely on the basis that’s what it is seeking – attention. So a couple of media/attention seeking whores have bred a media/attention seeking whore. Shocker!

    At the point this little cunt discovers the cure for cancer, give me a call. Until then, fuck off you little over privileged twat and actually do something useful with your life on your own terms without leeching off your fucking parents.

    • He was a dab hand at crosses and free kicks, but he couldn’t be a man with pace, could not head a ball, wasn’t great at tacking, and he was also prone to diving… And the way he sucked up to tabloidsand the Eng-gurland fans and put England above United after the Red Army stood by him and the press and the England fucktards called for his head and staged mock lynchings made me sick… Then again, he’s always been very stupid, and his Spice Girls manager probably put him up to it… One can imagine Fuller bullshitting: ‘ Dave, darling, the England hero gets more publicity than the United hero, and Real Madrid will be better for ‘Brand Beckham’… So do your best to antagonise Fergie and their fans…’ Fucking cunt…

      • Can’t disagree, Norm. I’m sure you caught my “successful” rather than the lazy “great”. Not a good all-round footballer by any means, but as you say – more interested in celebrity status than knuckling down and being a dedicated, hard working footballer. Shocking as it seemed to us non-Man U fans at the time, old Bacon Nose was absolutely spot on by getting rid. Oh how I miss him. The Prem was so much more fun with him running things. The combo of Fergie, Wenger, Mourinho and Benitez all trying to out psyche each other – good times. Ah well, back to the telly – got the Boxing Day footie on. Cheers – I.Y.

  9. I truly believe David Beckham was an average player.
    He could take a free kick, but so could Jorge Albertz, and I’d definitely have had the Hammer before Beckham at Leicester.
    For me, he only has the fame coz his career started at the same time that football became infested by celebrity fans.
    I’m.sure if he had played before the nineties, he would be in a park drinking the dregs from Kenny Samson’s discarded bottles.

    And when he went to LA Galaxy, he said he was going to spread the word of football.
    And there was cynical me, thinking it was all about the money and ensuring an American twang for the kids………

  11. Cant wait for the next middle eastern fiasco… not only can Brooklyn sign up to stand on the firing line for Democracy, now Harper can join too… should be entertaining as they try to fit in Twitter updates between VBIED attacks on their FOB… Only joking of course. They’ll send the usual Mugs, people who look a bit like you and me. Its a double whammy as well as you get to prosecute them for war crimes afterwards. Corrupt fucking sick in the head society.

  12. I would very much like to put down the entire Beckham clan. That empty headed mongtard and his wife, who seems to resemble Zelda from terra hawks more every day, epitomise everything that grips my shit. Please David upset Alllllllllah in some way so jihad will be declared upon you. On another note I may have to declare a Jiiiiiiiihad upon my wife if she eats the last Ferrero Rocher. Apparently I can have the last after eight because “it’s just as good”, no way is a shite after eight a trade for a Ferrero Rocher.

  13. Hang on, is the cunt doing a selfie on the pic above. Is that what passes for being a photographer these days?

    Yeah you and 4 billion other people you cunt!

    • A multimillionarie selfie cunt is basically a professional photographer through vogues eyes basically a “honourary photographer” for product promotion and brand advertising. Spinny Spin doctor cunts!

  14. Photography is about a moment in time, composition and light.
    Photography is not about privileged kids having a four figure Leica digital camera dropped in their hand, and a team of editors that correct in post.
    Photography isn’t all book deals and publicists, it’s remembering the shit yourself days when you’ve shot on film or slides and you have no idea if what’s in the camera is good enough or even close to what the client expects. No instant previews on location with Fuji Velvia.
    Photography is about learning everytime you pick up a camera.
    Photography is not all about Pirelli calendars and Vogue covers.
    It’s about coming across an old shoe box that you find whilst cleaning out the loft, thats full of old photos.
    Before you know it an hour has passed as a thousand memories are rebooted in your mind.
    Those fleeting moments, captured, are what photography is.
    I should know, I’ve been knocking my pipe out for years, camera in hand.
    No cunt has offered me a book deal and I’ve forgotten more than this kid will ever know…..

    • There are at least 21 words in that post unknown to the Beckhams. They have told the media that the little turd has a camera and he instantly becomes a photographer.
      The best photoshoppers will be paid to make the little cunt’s work look presentable. The Mail and all the fucking horde of cheapshit story gatherers will publish the pics and the unwashed hordes will go ‘Aaah,must be in the genes.’ Thus a dynasty is born.
      I puke and fart in their general direction.

  15. I was wondering why he hasn’t gone to uni to study photography.
    An ex of mine ( the chocolate spread/mars bar one) went to uni to study photography, and every now and again i Google her to see what she’s done.
    She has had some success, and has stuck with it, but unluckily for her and loads more photographers, they’ll never get the gigs that Brooklyn gets……….

  16. And in other football related news:

    “Liverpool footballer Roberto Firmino has been charged with drink-driving after being arrested on Christmas Eve.
    The 25-year-old forward was arrested after his car was stopped in Liverpool city centre in the early hours of Saturday, police said.”

    A spokesman for the club said that Roberto was living proof that even though many Liverpool players no longer came from the local area the club was working hard to educate them about local culture and instil the values of the area into the players.

  17. Tim Farron needs another cunting. Being a lefty imbecile, and cock sucking traitor, Farron decided to give his Christmas message from a migrant centre in Paris. Predictably, the In-British little fuckwit called for migrants at the centre to be allowed in to the UK, because they want to come here. Well I want to live on a colony on Mars, but it ain’t gonna fucking happen.

    And why do they want to come here? Over to Tim; “Because of Britain’s reputation as a place of peace and security and tranquillity. Somewhere where you can start afresh having witnessed appalling things at far too young an age.” Yep, that’s right. It’s not because they know that our dipshit Government will give them every benefit they demand, plus a house, free medical care and an education.

    He also said; “Many of them want to come to the UK. It’s interesting to hear why. Fleeing from appalling circumstances; from war, from oppression, from torture. From terrible, terrible things”. Really Tim? And how long has France been a warzone? Apart from the likes of ISIS and Al-Qaeda, France is not currently at war. It’s a place of peace and security and tranquillity. There’s no need for them to come here.

    Although he’s had support from the usual dipshits, Farron has received a lot criticism for his message, and it’s entirely justified. It does not surprise me in the least that a far left wanker like Farron would put Muslims before the British people. It’s only been a week since a so “refugee” murdered 12 innocent people and injured 50 more in Berlin. Farron didn’t mention that though, nor the industrial scale sex attacks in Munich 12 months ago. Also carried out by “refugees”.

    What about the homeless here in the UK? Particularly former servicemen and women who have fallen on hard times. Why should foreigners be given priority? I would far rather help one of my own, that a parasite, whose only interest in coming to the UK, is to take advantage of our over generous welfare system. It just goes to show that lefties are NOT going to change their attitude toward “refugees”, even when the evidence tells them that they should. Fuck you Farron.

    • Farron is the maggot on the rotting corpse of the old order, soon the cunt is buried with the rest of LabCon and bit part LibDems the better. he only way to make our votes count is get these cunts out of the system.

    • I remember listening to an interview with that cunt Farron. When asked that the rapugees who wanted to come to Britain weren’t children, his response was “does that matter, blah blah”. Same goes with his fucking Christmas speech. Left wing liberal wankstain. Just seeing his face wants me to pummel it with my shovel.

    • Heard that cunt Farron on Question a cunt time, and he was going on about Brexit and how people didn’t get to vote on the destination we are going to. What the fuck is it with these cunts, I am so fucking sick of these whining cunts. The sooner they get this Brexit moving the better. These days you are either a lefty cunt or a racist right wing cunt according to the lefty cunts, I bet most of them if they actually looked at what the unelected EU cunts have done to Greece, Spain etc then they wouldn’t even support it. The reason they are so pro EU is because they see it as a fight against the racists and the right wing.

      • He rally is a worm infested, shit speaking, worthless little weasel faced cunt. The sooner someone takes him out the better.
        The honourable member for Aleppo is a treacherous bastard.
        Like the rest of the stayers he just doesn’t understand that we did understand exactly what a vote to leave meant.
        The thing is B and WC those cunts will ignore what has happened in Greece etc as it doesn’t help them. They are so far up Brussels arse they cannot see or more truthfully, don’t want to se the mess.
        Now, I believe Brexit will be delivered so we can perhaps see some light at the end of the tunnel in not having Farron and his cunt cronies whining on.

      • What a incoherent sack of bile that fucking so called christmas message was. Some shite about mary an joseph and that if UK was war torn the rag heads would provide homes fo us!! That little cunt must be taking some kind of self righteous narcotic. The only talent the mong has is being able to gurn while he fucking speaks. I’m thinking of buying a place in the Lakes so I can be one of his constituents. Then I’ll be able to show the cunt the fucking destination I voted for in the referendum. Namely my fucking size 9 up his useless ring fucking hole. Pretend twat.

      • I just wonder how many seconds it would take for Tim to be stripped of all his possessions and slung into to some shithole slum house and buttfucked by the very people he loves so much in my neck of the woods. I’m from Wolverhampton, the place is totally fucked. These days it has its own form of sectarian violence between these “victims” who only want to come the the UK to contribute to our society. Well he is right, they certainly do contribute, Rape, drugs, violence, guns, theft and many more wonderful things are rising every day, thanks Tim for your help, now fuck off back to the majority white Oxfordshire (where most of the cunts seems to live) and continue to pontificate about help and need etc. Or..come and live in the town I was born in and live for a year you fucking gobshite cunt.

    • What I would like to know is which cunt was at the passport office while Farron was at the “Benefits Abroad” camp and DIDN’T cancel his passport then and there?

      I mean he’s so into their plight that maybe if we turned him into a refugee overnight, having to stay in Le Jungle might just open his eyes.

      Yes Tim when it gets dark there, all those twinkling lights are not stars, they’re the lights from the destitute and desperate “refugees” iPhone 7’s and Samsung Galaxy S6’s. And while your teeth are chattering in the cold, take heart, your “refugee” friends are all nice and warm in their NorthFace jackets.

      And who are they calling given their sad and lonely existence without any contact with their families since leaving whatever safe country they left (like Egypt, Tunisia, Morocco and other stable sub-saharan African countries)?

      Oh and if I were you Tim – given you look as soft as a stray dog’s shit – I’d get yourself in with one of those “families” we never see on the TV (but hear about all the time) because in the wee hours I’m sure a gaggle of those poor wee (male, 25-40yrs old) children will grace you with their presence and show you a bit of love, because let’s face it – in the absence of any women being there – you’re about the next best thing!

      I’d love to hear about your experience in the House of Commons, I’m sure you’ll be able to claim for the rubber ring to sit on as an expense.

  18. He came on in some charity match David was playing in and it obvious he’s not going to set the Football world alight so after a chat with Mummy he thought yeah I can be a Photographer. We will have Brand Beckham around for ages now, apart from the money it would piss me off having super rich parents especially famous ones as you’ll always be known as the son or daughter of…

  20. Happy Birthday Jesus Christ (heres looking at you big guy, I wish the world wasn’t filled so many damn heathen cunts) Please come back and kill all the cunts especially the ones (cunted) mentioned on this fine site

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year cunters, May your cuntings be fewer than the last year & blessings and peace and otherstuff
    I wish you all a protein christmas https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VPUC5pnm3w

    • Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to you as well, unfortunately I think we will be cunting the cunts more than ever before. There will be a lot more cunts next year.

      • And I predict another busy year for the Dead Pool. I reckon it’ll notch along to about 58 by this time next year.

  22. I actually feel for the silver-spooned Backham sprogs.
    Imagine knowing that every girlfriend you will ever have, will hate your mother and want to suck your dad off!
    At least being a photographer is a job (which their parents make them have) and they haven’t taken it upon themselves to preach to us ‘stupid commoners’ about world peace / african famine etc…
    Now those Geldoff cunts are another thing altogether.
    Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to everyone taking the time to visit this wonderful site of no nonesense, thank fuck we’re not alone!!!

  23. fucking hell are we going to have to put up with the spawn of the beckom cunts now who are going to be in the news constantly just cuz he,s related…..sniper required,should have been done on the parents at least they had a talent[well david did posh,s only talent is suspect is blow jobs]if she had swallowed that nite we wpuldnt have to put up with the kid trying to be a talent for fuck knows what…..fuuuuuucccckkkk offffff cccccuuuuuuunnnnnnnttttttttttssssssssss

  24. I want to cunt sky they really are cunts,they make your box and internet unreliable and when you eventually get through to fresh pesh from Bangladesh they wanna sell you sky q which is so good it was on whatchdog recently….no thanks sky you money grabbing cunts just provide the service I’m paying you for you cunts

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