Bob Monkhouse. A smarmy cunt of the highest order.
Supposedly had hundreds of jokebooks compiled over his career. Pity they were all full of self effacing baron shite that wouldn’t even make a moron grin. All that “what….” after/ before getting to his dire punchlines and looking around for acceptance. Needs a punch up the throat even though the cunt is dead.
Good riddence to a dire excuse for a human piece of shite.
Nominated by: Dave Moor
Couldn’t agree more. Smug bastard. Thing is it was all an act, but that doesn’t make ir better.
I view him differently these days after watching a docu about his collecting/saving of rare radio/tv recordings, but that’s not what makes him a cunt, it’s the way he portrayed himself as a smug comedian. A true cunt sans pissflaps !
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I fondly remember Bernie the cunt on the Golden shot.
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And Anne Aston in those tight tops and velvet hotpants…
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I remember really liking her on the Golden Shot when I was a six year old boy, but not being old enough to know why….
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Remember Monica Rose, bit of a troubled soul. Hughie green was an utter cunt.
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I wonder if Monkhouse was party the inspiration for Alan Partridge?
Partridge is like part Nick Owen, part Simon Groom and part Bob Monkhouse…
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Steve Coogan hypocritical bastard criticizes murdochs corruption but gets his check from HIM! http://order-order.com/2016/02/15/back-of-the-net-another-big-murdoch-money-deal-for-coogan/ but yes I think monkhouse influenced the Alan Partridgecharacter
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Can’t argue with that, TitSlapper… The new Partridge series is on Sky Atlantic… Slags Uncle Rupert, but takes his dosh.. As Partridge himself might say, ‘Cashback!’
f reckon Steve’s pissed off about how the News Of The Screws bugged his phone and grassed him up about his coke sniffing and stripper shagging exploits….
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“Steve Coogan hypocritical bastard criticizes murdochs corruption but gets his check from HIM”
I think it would be far more hypocritical if Coogan was taking payments from Murdoch’s newspapers. No one has ever suggested that the film and tv production companies owned by Murdoch are corrupt.
That said, Coogan is of course a MASSIVE CUNT:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CQTm6nubfbs
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Thanks for the vid everyone can be a bit of a cunt including yours truly
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Partridge also has the faux-gravitas and self-importance of John Stapleton and Richard Madeley too.
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There is definitely Madeley in there , Fred… And, if I’m honest, a bit of Tony Wilson is in Partridge too…
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Bob Monkhouse, what a monumental cunt, cuprinol skinned, bryl creamed hair & about as funny as Richard Herring, if he was still alive no doubt Yewtree would be sniffing at his front door, seems every one from the 70’s had a penchant for ‘young un’s’
It is said he had books and books of jokes meticulously saved, you’d think someone with that much material could at least tell one which was funny.
Greasy little fuck turd
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Whoa, hold on. Comparing anyone to Richard “I went to Oxford” Herring is a bit harsh. Even Mugabe’s regime baulks at such unethical punishment.
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Old Bob may have been a bit of a cunt but he was head and shoulders above any of the “Comedians” we get today. Unfunny sacks of shite the lot of em.
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“Million joke man” my arse.
Unfunny cunt, decade after decade.
Having said that, looks like comedy genius if you’ve ever seen word strangler Stewart Lee.
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Totally agree, when Stewart Lee and Richard Herring were a double act they were about as funny as Jimmy Saville and Stuart Hall would have been presenting Blue Peter, can you imagine that, now then now then boys and girls, look what I’ve made this week out of a washing up bottle and sticky back plastic.
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So we can actually nominate people who are dead? Excellent, Karl Marx was a cunt. Along with every other middle class already moneyed hypocrite and cuntish student who thinks of the “Father of Modern Socialism” as some kind of fucking god. The trouble with Socialism is not, as the Empress Maggon (cunt) said, that you eventually run out of other peoples money. The problem with Socialism is that you never meet any working class Socialists. I’d have “strong Socialist principles”, if I could afford them….
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Absolutely right Mr.Bastard bloody champagne socialists sitting on their ass criticising everyone around them getting fat(rich) from the weak and poor. Socialist’s and communists are bunch of evil cunts like IDS. Truly the pigs from animal farm
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If we can nominate dead people I would like to choose Vlad the Impaler he was a cruel and ruthless dictator, but very good to his mother and enjoyed flower arranging in his spare time, I bet even Hitler had a cuddly side.
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To his credit, the moniker of “Vlad the Impaler” is somewhat more inspiring a legacy than “Dave the Pigfucker”…
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Vlad was probably better at “Public Relations” too..
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I still can’t believe Keith Emerson offed himself his death affected me alot more than Bowie’s death did. Ironically I was downloading ELP the night before he killed himself woke up then checked the obituary for my deadpool noms sure enough he died, later confirmed he committed suicide . His girlfriend was sexy too some japanese bird . https://youtu.be/uSm5IQFaTZA
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Compared to the no talent cunts around these days Monkhoise is a partial genius orf mirth. That said could never stand the greasy cunt and always had to be careful not to crack any gags within earshot orf the wank stain because he had a phenomenal memory and my material would be headlining his next gig. We all knew he collected stuff and he was always around hoovering up demo tapes, show reels ect. Nobody ever guessed he was BetaMaxing all the TV shows orn the air. Offered him some orf me artistic material but he was never that interested in it. Interesting he became a national treasure and inspiration for all the wanker standups the second he died.
Coogan orn the other hand was/is a total paranoid cunt. That show he does with the welsh cunt is Coogan in life. Resentful jealous bastard always looking to get one up orn a fellah. Have had dealings and would recommend barge pole, don’t touch. Get me drift.
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Bob was gold compared to the creepy shit that try to be funny these days.
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TV comedian double-acts are cunts. Well almost all of them.
Mike and Bernie Winters – one acting like a special needs mong with a mental age of 5, and the other his nasty paedophile uncle on the edge of the snuff scene.
Morecambe and Wise – pitiful formulaic low-brow Ground-hog day unfunny cheap cat vomit (with a big prop budget).
Little and Large – get to fuck you pathetic sad cunts.
Cannon and Ball – brain-dead comedy of the lowest order to bore alzheimer vegetables into swallowing their own tongues to make it stop.
Reeves and Mortimer – alcoholic fuckmupery for the faux-hippy media studies polytechnic set.
The krankies – rare and strange sexual deviance fuelled with drugs, presented to frightened and bewildered children.
Ant & Dec – genetically modified shit bags that have one idea that is rammed down people’s throats as if they are foie gras ducks.
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You forgot that class act The Chuckle Cunts. To me, to you, knowing me, knowing you ahaaa!
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I liked Morecambe and Wise, but I agree that the rest were shite…
Bernie Winters was a massive cunt and Eddie Large was/is a bitter bluenose Man City fat cunt…. When Syd and Eddie started out and did the Manchester clubs, Syd was quite a good singer… But every time he did a song that cunt Eddie would start all his shit with silly voices and that fucking Cliff Richard impression… Syd should have shot the fat, stage hogging cunt…
I know they’re Yanks, but Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis were cunts too…
Les Dawson and Roy Barrowclough were fucking ace though…
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You forgot:
Lee & Herring: Stewart Lee & Richard Herring, pair of cunts, one is a pseudo intellectual cunt sucking at the teat of the BBC, the other is a fat cunt begging for money on the Internet to fund his shows.
Punt & Dennis: Steve Punt & Hugh Dennis, pair of cunts, One is an arsehole sucking at the teat of the BBC, the other is sucking off men for loose change in London somewhere.
Fry & Laurie: Stephen Fry & Hugh Laurie, One is a fat cocaine addict homo sucking at the teat of the BBC, the other has run away to America cause no one likes him.
Skinner & Baddiel: Frank Skinner & David Baddiel, One is an alcoholic cunt sucking at the teat of the BBC, the other is a big nosed Jew sucking at the teat of the BBC.
French & Saunders: Dawn French & Jennifer Saunders, both fat, unfunny cunts sucking at the teat of the BBC.
I could go on…
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Hugh Laurie is a absolute cunt sure he was fine in blackadder but these yank shows he’s doing are piss poor. A vicodin pill popping bellend a medical genius who leads a team of other diagnosticians(bellends) nuff said shite show. What a great thing to teach the already drug induced youth take drugs!.
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I always thought Tim (Percy/Darling) McInnery was the real talent in Blackadder.
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Going back a bit (40s 50s 60s) Jewell and Warriss, a then famous double act copied later by Morcambe and Wise. Two cousins and both born in the same bed the story goes. Jimmy (Jewell) was a crusty tight arse and Ben (Warriss) a free spending ladies man. You may recognise Jimmy from telly- Spring And Autumn, Nearest And Dearest ect. Ben retired for many years and married a dancer more than half his age until going into theatre but that is another story.
http://inmemory.inmemoriaproduct.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/12/Jimmy-Jewel.jpg
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