It was shite. Really shite. I was disappointed as fuck.
Nominated by: Quick Draw McGraw
What eclipse? All I saw were clouds…
Nominated by: Dioclese
95% totality? That description was about as accurate as the Tories 15 year austerity plan and as ambitious as Nick Clegg hoping to get elected.
Oddly enough, it prompted some strange behaviour by brickies working across the road, who at the moment of totality chose to bare their arses to all and sundry (no diamond rings there I can assure you)
Nominated by: Lez
UnfortunatIey I saw the eclipse and now can see nothing else. My eyes, my beautiful blue eyes………. Perhaps ’tis a blessing in disguise as I can’t find my matches.
Nominated by: Flaxen Saxon
Hey don’t blame the eclipse itself! The eclipse can hardly help being shite. What can help being shite however is the huge media hype which always precedes the complete non-event. It was the same with the last eclipse which even I as a teenage sci-fi geek found very underwhelming.
I found the appearance of Hale-Boop comet back in 1997 to be even more of a letdown.
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Petitions, petitions are for cunts.
“100,000 sign petition to stop Kanye West headlining Glastonbury!”
Firstly, yes, Kanye West is a big cunt but if he’s booked, let the cunt perform.
Secondly, Glastonbury is 95% cunts, cunts who just want to ‘selfie’ themselves with Greg James.
Thirdly, and most importantly, if we are going to use these cunts logic that 100,000 people don’t want him there by the signing of this petition surely we are then entitled to rationally understand that the 7 billion people who didn’t sign it want him there.
Don’t want to see him? Don’t go. Just keep yourself entertained at the dance stage sucking cocks for fags. Cunts.
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A worthwhile addition to the list – as is Glasto itself…
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Glastonbury is 100% cunts. You have to be a cunt to organise it these days. You have to be a cunt to go, or want to go. And you have to be a cunt to want perform there.
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Agreed, I gave the 5% a bit of a break in case they have rolled up thinking it was as it had been decades ago. They’ll probably amble around for half a day, open mouthed at the tattooed (not in a cool ‘Motorhead’ way) bodies of students with Daddies money in their bum bags then slit their own wrists in their tents, weeping at the dying of poular youth culture as they do it.
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‘Glasto” is full of twatbags who go ‘glamping’… A horrible term which means glamorous camping… ie: posh, spoonfed fuckers poncing about in expensive winnebagos with their fridges full of champers, nose candy and swizzle sticks… I also loathe the student (the kind of student Paul Calf despises) element that thinks crappy novelty acts/nonces like Rolf Harris and Paul Gadd that perform at ‘Glasto’ are ‘zany’ and ‘quaint’ and wear T-Shirts with the cunts names/faces on them… If you put most of these Glasto cunts in the middle of Donnington in the 80s they’d shit themselves… Bomb Glasto, I say….
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You might find this of interest Norman
http://nuclearsecrecy.com/nukemap/
(i tried the effects on Liverpool this morning, took a 50Kiloton warhead to take out the scousers and Birkenhead to be on the safe side
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Disappointing how big a bomb I’d need to take out my own town. Some of the cunts here would survive…
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Cheers, Lez… The Mickeys are pretty good at self combustion as it is… See Stevie Me lltoday at Anfield… Not to mention the rest of the cunts.. YNWA, my arse!
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I’d love to play Glasto – but then I’m a cunt!
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Radamel Falcao or, more to the point, his agent, is a cunt…
Buiilt like a brick shithouse, looks like he’s from a western, and his agent is telling all and sundry that he and Falcao ‘cry together’ over the player’s ‘predicament’ at United…
Well, for a start, he isn’t half as upset as the fans who have to endure Falcao’s Garry Birtles impressons.. Also, is this the best we can do these days? Whatever happened to the great Denis Law, or Pancho Pearson and Jimmy Greehoff? Joe Jordan cleaning his fangs on the corner flag after persecuting the opposition? Or Sparky Hughes equalizing against the Scousers, doing a ‘bollocks’ gesture and saying ‘Pick it out, vermin!” to the baying Koppites?
Now we’ve got some foreign softarse, blubbing just because LVG told him he was shite and put him in the U-21s…. Hardly the man to lead the charge… We’d be better off with Frank Spencer up front…
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Glastonbury (like most festivals) ain’t what it used to be. Overpriced, crawling with bloody students, indifferent acts and catering vans selling botulism burgers.
Now, “Storming the Castle” event is one I’d truly recommend. AND Wilco Johnson is headlining, what more could you want?
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Good to know WIlco is still with us… The Feelgoods were a proper fucking band…
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